FUN FRIDAY MFP DEBATE: PRENUPS!

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  • maab_connor
    maab_connor Posts: 3,927 Member
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    I had just about nothing and a 30k a year job when we got married. No need for one.

    If I had a family fortune or say a house or two that I OWNED, not paying 99% interest on, sure might be a good reason to have one.

    Great opportunity to steal from Chris Rock:

    "Now if you make $50 million and your wife wants half that's alright! You ain't starvin'. But if you make $30,000.. and your wife wants $15,000.. you might have to kill a b*^ch! I'm not moving back in with my mother because you ain't in love!"

    perfection!!

    also, what's wrong w/ ironing out these details when you're not both in the middle of rage and greif?
  • mminor77
    mminor77 Posts: 313
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    If there is a prenup involved on his side or mine I wouldn't see the point of getting married. Its all or nothing as far as I'm concerned.
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
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    It's between the two people getting married. It's nobody else's place to suggest they get one, particularly the groom's parents, and especially when I make more than he does...

    wait, now it's getting personal. Carry on....

    LMFAO :smooched:
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
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    I'd sign one.

    I come to the table with nothing... including being debt free. I'm good with me as is and need nothing from dude.

    Then again, I'm not so keen on marriage sometimes.
  • ZombieChaser
    ZombieChaser Posts: 1,555 Member
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    Knowing what I know now, you bet your *kitten* I will. I lost a lot - and for there record, some men take more than their share too, it's not just women.
  • magj0y
    magj0y Posts: 1,911 Member
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    It's between the two people getting married. It's nobody else's place to suggest they get one, particularly the groom's parents, and especially when I make more than he does...

    wait, now it's getting personal. Carry on....

    HAHA.

    if there are major assets one is bring into the marriage such as a business. It ALSO protects the person who is coming in with nothing. If he owns a house or business and defaults, you can squirm your way out so you're not penalized with a bankruptcy if he files after the divorce
  • 55AngelH55
    55AngelH55 Posts: 117
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    HWkVf.gif
  • TubbsMcGee
    TubbsMcGee Posts: 1,058 Member
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    I think it really depends on the relationship.

    I've had this conversation with my boyfriend (we've been together for almost 7 years) and we came to the conclusion that what's ours is ours...I'd only take what I paid for and him the same. Not to say that we're expecting to break up, but we're even looking into buying a second house and renting it out in case it comes down to that, so we'd each have our own place with our own crap.

    Even if things somehow became bitter between the two of us, we're not heartless enough to involve a lawyer to help either one of us claim what isn't ours.

    ...I'm assuming that pinky promise is legal enough.
  • doughnutwretch
    doughnutwretch Posts: 498 Member
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    Personally... no. I trust my spouse and trust our relationship and wouldn't want that kind of thing hanging over our relationship.


    However, if people are in line to make a lot of money in their future, either from working, inheritance, what have you, I don't think it's a bad idea. Divorce is all-to-common in our society and it never hurts to prepare yourself, especially if you have any kind of doubts about your relationship.
  • Rae6503
    Rae6503 Posts: 6,294 Member
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    Better to have one and not need it, then to need it and not have it.

    We don't have one.
  • Rae6503
    Rae6503 Posts: 6,294 Member
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    HWkVf.gif

    Classic.
  • Il_DaniD_lI
    Il_DaniD_lI Posts: 1,593 Member
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    I say nay. If I ever get married it will be for good, no reason for a prenup.
  • scapez
    scapez Posts: 2,018 Member
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    It worked well for Tom Cruise!
  • Jebbster007
    Jebbster007 Posts: 265 Member
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    Definitely not for me.

    I will say as others have that it is absolutely up to the two individuals. If they feel they need one and the party needing to sign is ok with it....who is anyone to tell them no.

    However, with that being said, its very difficult to not see the person asking for one as someone who is expecting the union to fail.

    Score:

    Security - 10

    Romance - 0
  • katrwal
    katrwal Posts: 336 Member
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    Interestingly, our pastor at the time recommended we do one, just to have some structure around a finances discussion... we found the process really helpful in that we disclosed our full debt as well as asset loads, and talked about our financial priorities (such as what kind of debt is good debt, whether to pay for the kids' college, what kind of mortgage/how big is reasonable, etc.). We finished the process and signed it, but never got it notarized - not sure if it would ever hold up in court - but in the last 7 years we've had very few fights about money.

    Now, discipline of the kids or where to drop the wet towels is a totally different topic - hard to get those into a pre-nup, though... :drinker:
  • jcstanton
    jcstanton Posts: 1,849 Member
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    I can understand how some people would want to be cautious, especially considering the day and age in which we live. However, for me personally, if I felt there was a need for a prenup, I'd have to seriously reconsider getting married. Either there are some red flags regarding the character of the person I'm marrying, or I have some serious trust issues. Either way, it's an indicator that marriage to this particular person at this particular time, may not be such a good idea. Plus, as others have said, it sort of feels like you're going into the marriage with low expectations, which is never a good sign.
  • tashjs21
    tashjs21 Posts: 4,584 Member
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    My ex boyfriend always said he wanted one to "protect himself" Uhhhh, seeing how he was unemployed when we met and I footed the bill the first year of us dating (I know, I was stupid) and we built our home together (after he finally joined the working world) I was extremely offended.

    That is why he is an ex. The hubby and I don't have a whole lot so if we did suddenly have money to squabble over then it came into being after the marriage and we'll deal with it then.

    I can see if you have loads of money and property and the other person doesn't, protecting yourself. However, if you don't then it is pretty much an *kitten* move IMO.

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