Best things I've seen/read in dating profiles
Why not. Here are a handful of things. Can you top em?
Some things I've seen in chick's profiles:
1. "Guys, I'm done giving one night stands now. I want something a little more." (Damn, always 5 minutes late to the party.)
2. Chick with 7 pics of her with 7 different guys. (Care to make it 8 for 8?).
3. The "I don't want this, I don't want that and my ex did this and that" chick. (Hey, at least she's not bitter.)
4. Let me tell you about the time I played Monopoly with a hooker when I was 11. (Oh wait, that's from my profile. Whoops).
5. Picture of chick holding a beer or possibly kissing another chick and looking blitzed BUT she's good woman looking for an honest, loyal man for evenings cuddling inside. (uh huh)
6. The down-to-earth chick with pics in every tropical location around the world and in front of her $50,000+ car and 6-bedroom home.
7. The "about average" chick who is clearly 150-200 pounds overweight. (I know we all fudge a little bit, but let's keep it in the ballpark and yes, guys do it too).
8. I love giving and getting oral---question in OKCupid. (I messaged her, fingers crossed.).
9. I only date bald men. (I wasn't sure if she meant upstairs or downstairs, so I emailed her for clarification).
10. I just got out of a relationship and am looking around for a good guy. (Houston, we have liftoff).
There's more but a lot of this crap runs together.
And if you're not on my friends list, why not? Are you boring? Send me a friends request already.
Don't be shy, add DesignGuy.
Some things I've seen in chick's profiles:
1. "Guys, I'm done giving one night stands now. I want something a little more." (Damn, always 5 minutes late to the party.)
2. Chick with 7 pics of her with 7 different guys. (Care to make it 8 for 8?).
3. The "I don't want this, I don't want that and my ex did this and that" chick. (Hey, at least she's not bitter.)
4. Let me tell you about the time I played Monopoly with a hooker when I was 11. (Oh wait, that's from my profile. Whoops).
5. Picture of chick holding a beer or possibly kissing another chick and looking blitzed BUT she's good woman looking for an honest, loyal man for evenings cuddling inside. (uh huh)
6. The down-to-earth chick with pics in every tropical location around the world and in front of her $50,000+ car and 6-bedroom home.
7. The "about average" chick who is clearly 150-200 pounds overweight. (I know we all fudge a little bit, but let's keep it in the ballpark and yes, guys do it too).
8. I love giving and getting oral---question in OKCupid. (I messaged her, fingers crossed.).
9. I only date bald men. (I wasn't sure if she meant upstairs or downstairs, so I emailed her for clarification).
10. I just got out of a relationship and am looking around for a good guy. (Houston, we have liftoff).
There's more but a lot of this crap runs together.
And if you're not on my friends list, why not? Are you boring? Send me a friends request already.
Don't be shy, add DesignGuy.
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Replies
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All the men's profiles are boring...outdoorsy, hunt, fish, camp, me Tarzan you Jane!0
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a friend showed me a profile of a guy who wrote: "I am very intellaganent."
Ha- you sure are, buddy.0 -
I had a guy tell me that a girl wrote "My idea of a first date is NOT at your house". After dinner on the first date the guy asked what they should do next and she said, "Let's go to your house" where she proceeded to take off her shirt...0
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a friend showed me a profile of a guy who wrote: "I am very intellaganent."
Ha- you sure are, buddy.
LOL. That's priceless. Goodness.0 -
I had a guy tell me that a girl wrote "My idea of a first date is NOT at your house". After dinner on the first date the guy asked what they should do next and she said, "Let's go to your house" where she proceeded to take off her shirt...
hahahahah0 -
They also want a "real" woman that is kind, loyal, nice, ... funny I meet all those qualities, but I never hear back from them when I email them... and they don't seem to be knocking down my door (one that did respond asked me how much I weighed, turns out his "real" woman is a size -4 supermodel...)All the men's profiles are boring...outdoorsy, hunt, fish, camp, me Tarzan you Jane!0 -
*lol* I never browsed the dating sites. I got married young, divorced after 5 years, met a new guy (who messaged me on MySpace and told me he had just gone through a divorce if I wanted to talk or needed support - he was friends with a couple of my cousins), and we hit it off
Those were hilarious dating quotes 0 -
Why not. Here are a handful of things. Can you top em?
Some things I've seen in chick's profiles:
1. "Guys, I'm done giving one night stands now. I want something a little more." (Damn, always 5 minutes late to the party.)
2. Chick with 7 pics of her with 7 different guys. (Care to make it 8 for 8?).
3. The "I don't want this, I don't want that and my ex did this and that" chick. (Hey, at least she's not bitter.)
4. Let me tell you about the time I played Monopoly with a hooker when I was 11. (Oh wait, that's from my profile. Whoops).
5. Picture of chick holding a beer or possibly kissing another chick and looking blitzed BUT she's good woman looking for an honest, loyal man for evenings cuddling inside. (uh huh)
6. The down-to-earth chick with pics in every tropical location around the world and in front of her $50,000+ car and 6-bedroom home.
7. The "about average" chick who is clearly 150-200 pounds overweight. (I know we all fudge a little bit, but let's keep it in the ballpark and yes, guys do it too).
8. I love giving and getting oral---question in OKCupid. (I messaged her, fingers crossed.).
9. I only date bald men. (I wasn't sure if she meant upstairs or downstairs, so I emailed her for clarification).
10. I just got out of a relationship and am looking around for a good guy. (Houston, we have liftoff).
There's more but a lot of this crap runs together.
And if you're not on my friends list, why not? Are you boring? Send me a friends request already.
Don't be shy, add DesignGuy.
:laugh:0 -
I don't have any, but google "abcotd" (a bad case of the dates). Some great stories (even if some seem made up) with lots of good 'peculiar profiles'0
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All the men's profiles are boring...outdoorsy, hunt, fish, camp, me Tarzan you Jane!
honest to god. .i think they are all duking it out over the one single woman on the planet who is into that. And lets face it.. she doesn't need online dating!
i just get the jump backs (such scary photos, you jump back from the screen) Last night's "gem" looks like Charles Manson without the swastika on his forehead! Other than that, it's just crude comments or my all time favorite "hi", "hey" or the creme ala creme "hay"0 -
When I was on a dating website (they do work! I met my fiance on it) a guy wanted to go out and we finally met up and he looked nothing like his pictures. I think he could tell by my expression and fessed up to the pics being 5 years old. No hair and 50 lbs later is what I got.0
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Hilarious!!! You nailed it, man.0
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How about the ones that don't have a picture on their profile...but they're not married or anything! Lol0
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Once, there was a man who rambled on his page about how small his penis was. He stated it as a disclaimer and said that his ex-girlfriend cheated on him because of it. He was not looking for another cheater.... But rather for "someone who would love him for him."
A close second is every guy who writes that he is the "nice guy"... But then send you mean, vulgar messages telling you that you're a stuck up ***** for not responding to his clearly well thought out "Hi!" message.
Last but not least....
"She must be able to be as comfortable in a pair of blue jeans as she is in a little black dress."
On pretty much every man's profile.0 -
I honestly could write a book on all the bad dates I went on from one of those dating sites. My friends told me I should have my own blog and call it mydateblog.com Another friend suggested that I should wear a "date cam", like one of those reality shows....lol0
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All the men's profiles are boring...outdoorsy, hunt, fish, camp, me Tarzan you Jane!
I think that's because that's all they are hard wired for, unfortunately for us :ohwell:0 -
OMG!!!!! Scary stuff!0 -
Jason as your assitant on this dating endeavor? were does my profile land in those stereotypes? Think hard before you answer... No seriously any input would be appreciated.. And you saw I stated I was a few extra pounds so that shouldn't be an issue. 0
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I once read a guy's profile that said "I'm just looking for a local f***k buddy"..............well.....points for honesty? :huh:0
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I just want the 50 year old cowboys to go away... or the 30 somethign male sluts to go away also. AGGGG0
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i always loved the guys who appear so into finding out all about you...and then send/share a photo of their "junk" or whip it out after meeting for 30 minutes.
*sigh* those were the good ole days...NOT.0 -
a friend showed me a profile of a guy who wrote: "I am very intellaganent."
Ha- you sure are, buddy.
Hahaha... Yeah I have seen my share of 'winners' whilst on dating sites. I met my husband off of OKC so I guess one of us had a decent profile.
I have seen some profiles listed as seeking NSA relationships, when mine was clearly looking for something more, but they'd still waste their time and mine messaging me. Best advice for online dating profiles? Keep it simple and honest, don't give away too much information... less truly is more. Oh and use recent pictures! Within the last 6 months recent!
The best messages I would get were 45+ year old men.... REALLY? I clearly stated my age range was no older than 30. If you're old enough to be my dad it isn't going to work out, sorry! (I am 22 now, I was 19/20 at the time).0 -
They also want a "real" woman that is kind, loyal, nice, ... funny I meet all those qualities, but I never hear back from them when I email them... and they don't seem to be knocking down my door (one that did respond asked me how much I weighed, turns out his "real" woman is a size -4 supermodel...)i just get the jump backs (such scary photos, you jump back from the screen) Last night's "gem" looks like Charles Manson without the swastika on his forehead! Other than that, it's just crude comments or my all time favorite "hi", "hey" or the creme ala creme "hay"
Yup! These two scenarios adequately sum up my experience with online dating. $60, three months, and countless wasted hours later, I had nothing to show for the experience.All the men's profiles are boring...outdoorsy, hunt, fish, camp, me Tarzan you Jane!
honest to god. .i think they are all duking it out over the one single woman on the planet who is into that. And lets face it.. she doesn't need online dating!
Actually, I am pretty much this girl, but I still can't get any responses. I'm not sure if it's due to the fact that I don't look like Megan Fox in addition to having these other qualities, or if it's because I come across as "one of the guys".0 -
Haha...an I like chesse burgers an chesse burgers an sonic an fast food places an fancy places! Bahahaha! I am DYING!!!!0 -
Haha...an I like chesse burgers an chesse burgers an sonic an fast food places an fancy places! Bahahaha! I am DYING!!!!
LMAO....Sonic...very classy!! He knows how to treat his lady!!0 -
Haha...an I like chesse burgers an chesse burgers an sonic an fast food places an fancy places! Bahahaha! I am DYING!!!!
Oh my! Where do you even begin on this one? Oh my! Boooo :huh:0 -
I once read a guy's profile that said "I'm just looking for a local f***k buddy"..............well.....points for honesty? :huh:
I think design guy knows of a gal that might be interested in hooking up with that guy :devil:0 -
My experience from 13 years ago: www.waytoopersonal.com
I don't think anything's really changed. :laugh:0 -
9. I only date bald men. (I wasn't sure if she meant upstairs or downstairs, so I emailed her for clarification).
Epic! lol0
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