What behaviour/attitude led you down the fat path?

AlphamaleBAMF

I was fat all my life. Because I didn't understand even the basics. I never knew anything about BMR, TDEE, calories, sodium, carbs, exercise calories etc.

I'd happily consume coke, sandwiches sit on my *kitten* playing video games for years on end with no exercise.

I actually hated people that ate fruits and vegetables and went to gym and worried about their weight. Non smokers, non drinkers. Non gamers. They were noobs, idiots. Sheeple. People that were vain stuck up fools that only cared about their looks because of propaganda fashion on TV. That was how I actually thought. That was how I got to 300lb. Apathy, ignorance and denial.

If I knew then what I know now. I never would have got that big. Now that I understand this stuff, sure I binge sometimes. But generally I'm trending toward massive weight loss. And I know in 4-8 months I will reach my goal and go beyond that.

I got on my old mountain bike and vowed to ride that b*tch out until the wheels fall off ❤ lol

I wish I was that mountain bike.

windycitycupcake

severe depression. i can't even begin to explain why on here, too personal. but it got worse and worse over the course of a year and a half. i totally isolated myself. in the darkest time, i lay on a couch for days straight only getting up to use the bathroom and answer the door for food delivery. i ate and ate until i got sick then ate more.

Tank_Girl

severe depression. i can't even begin to explain why on here, too personal. but it got worse and worse over the course of a year and a half. i totally isolated myself. in the darkest time, i lay on a couch for days straight only getting up to use the bathroom and answer the door for food delivery. i ate and ate until i got sick then ate more.

^ this.

mogletdeluxe

A poor relationship with food from a very young age. Food was regarded as a reward, a treat, rather than fuel for the body. I got into a 'I've earned this' mentality very quickly. Cue binge-eating from the age of 11 that was noticed but left alone by my parents, and the weight steadily went on.

I was always praised for having a hearty appetite as a child and was told to clear my plate on all occasions. I was tall for my age, and carrying some fat, and dined out on that "puppy fat" for a very long time. You know you won't grow out of it when you're in your late teens; that's for sure.

As I got older, the classic of denial not just being a river in Egypt really kicked in. I was very quick to label myself as 'curvy', 'big-boned' (God, I hate those terms now). I was Amazonian, statuesque (which, when you consider I'm a distinctly average 5'5", is a crock). I carried it well (I look at photos now and realise how wrong I was).

Plainly put, I loved food more than I loved myself. More importantly, I loved food more than I hated being fat; being rejected by the opposite sex; being ostracised; and not being able to shop in the same shops as my friends. That's a whole lotta (awful) love.

super_monty

Bad food education and apathy.

There was always unlimited supply of sweets, crisps, soda and cake in my house when growing up. Even though my parents didn't eat them. It became habit and apathy.

Even now it goes on.
I limit my child to this food without denying him, but i still argue with my Mum she believes that my child is missing out (even though he has sweets etc on a treat day). I say what is he missing out on obesity and diabetes. Even after he had 5 teeth removed because grandparents were filling him full of sweets and junk without my knowledge and after specifically being told not to.


HOW I LOST IT WAS THIS:

I have posted this a few times.

My train of thought and my main motivation for my loss:

Until I CHOOSE to stop living in DENIAL about being FAT, I can then CHOOSE to do something about it, BY ACKNOWLEDGING that I was/am FAT and unhealthy I can CHOOSE to MOTIVATE myself.


This enlightenment came to me while working in an office with many other fat people except for the ultra fit manager.

Someone was saying that they hate being overweight as they ate a packet of crisps and a full fat fat coke, he simply said 'well its your CHOICE'

And he is 100% right in my opinion, we choose not to exercise and we choose not to eat right.

I find that harsh reality and being blunt motivates me.

shoneybabes

the thing is that weight generally goes on slowly so you don't notice it. So a couple of pounds a month every month and over a year a stone has been gained. A lot of people just brush it off with "it has been a stressful year at work/home/(fill in blank)" however they don't change their eating habits and before they know it they are classed as obese, lost all self esteem and eating junk food to feel better about themselves.

I am not saying this happens to everyone but I reckon many folk have been there and some stop it before it gets out of control and others don't until something scares them to stop.

EvgeniZyntx

Reading through the replies so far it is clear that the mental and emotional aspects - from depression, revenge eating, education, disinterest are all huge parts of the "fat path". So a site like MFP addresses the physical aspects of weight loss (mostly) and fitness (barely) but fails to track and provide input or tools into the emotional and mental aspects, except of the community support which I recognize is a big plus. Education is also a huge element.

Thanks for the answers so far, they are eye openers.

As I think about this, I know I need to help my daughters have good attitudes about food and work on these aspects so that they have the tools to eat better too - not just restricting certain food types at the table.

Raimi1990

I was never any good at physical activity, and I have very poor motor coordination. Even in elementary school, people would make fun of me because I tripped a lot (especially when running), couldn't catch, and couldn't throw. Due to the teasing, I gave up trying to play the outdoor games that my peers enjoyed so much. I was 8 years old when I started becoming overweight.

Now, almost 14 years later, I'm still very uncoordinated, but at least I can walk all of the weight off. My doctor said running would ruin my knees and back because I"m so heavy, so all I CAN do is walk.

I lost 8 pounds doing so before weighing in for this site, actually.

foxyforce

time to get honest:

i have a shady history with people and rejection. i started binging pretty bad after a past breakup. i saw my grandma yesterday and she was talking about how she doesn't even know if my mother is going to go to my wedding. note: my mother and i have no real issues, and we are not estranged.

that is just to paint a picture

i fill voids, with binging. trying to fill voids with happiness, but it isn't always easy.

roguestates

Reading through the replies so far it is clear that the mental and emotional aspects - from depression, revenge eating, education, disinterest are all huge parts of the "fat path". So a site like MFP addresses the physical aspects of weight loss (mostly) and fitness (barely) but fails to track and provide input or tools into the emotional and mental aspects, except of the community support which I recognize is a big plus. Education is also a huge element.

Thanks for the answers so far, they are eye openers.

As I think about this, I know I need to help my daughters have good attitudes about food and work on these aspects so that they have the tools to eat better too - not just restricting certain food types at the table.

Food is so emotional for so many folks. Raising your daughters to have a healthy attitude towards food AND their own bodies is one of the most important things you can do for them in such a hostile world. A number of us grew up in unhealthy homes with unhealthy habits, helping to lead us where we are. It didn't make us fat, but it made it easier to be fat. And worse than fat is the self-loathing that accompanies unhealthy minds.

Amberonamission

I have only just rooted out the true cause of why I do this. Thank goodness for my therapist. When I was 9 (and getting a lil chubby, or more accurately growing bewbs and hips early) my Dad looked me in my eyes and said that "no man would ever love me fat". I spent the next 30 years proving him wrong.

Every time I lost weight I'd get to a point where people would start being very weirdly nice to me and I'd get so mad (or freaked) that I'd fail.

I have set up a support system so solid this time that if those feelings should overwhelm me again, I have people to catch me.

GuruOnAMountain

I've always been a bit chubby, even as a kid. My mum is one of those women that believes the way to express love is by feeding her loved ones big portions and often, so I ate far more than I needed as a kid and of course, being a kid, you don't realise. Also, I was the academic sort rather than the sporty sort. I did enjoy kicking a ball around or going out on a bike but my mum was quite protective and would only let me play in my garden and I wasn't allowed to go out cycling without my dad and since he worked shifts, that wasn't very often.

Plus I'm in Scotland so getting outdoors from about September until April isn't very likely as you're more likely to get drenched in rain or up to your knees in snow, so instead I was encouraged to stay in, read, colour in, play musical instruments. I was never a FAT kid, though, but was certainly not a skinny kid.

I'd say that I piled most of the weight on when I was in my final year of my Undergrad. I was doing a lot of work at home in the final few months when classes were over but dissertation hand in was looming and exams were coming up, so I was sedentary, at a desk working and my mum tended to come into my room with food, sweets etc. thinking that she was helping because I was working so hard. Of course, while you're stressed and concentrating on revising or writing, you aren't focussing on how many times your hand goes into the bag of sweets next to you.

My mum also never let us have scales in our house as she was worried my sister and I would become anorexic (little chance of that with me! Lol), so I don't even know what weight I was at that point but I reckon I was probably about 13 and a half stones, or thereabouts. I then joined the Officer Training Corps the next year while doing a Postgrad and was being a lot more active so a lot of that weight started to come off and I got down to about 12 stones before I got seriously into fitness and got down to 11.

I stayed there for a few years until I met my boyfriend and started my PhD. Suddenly I didn't have as much time on my hands between doing the PhD full-time, working two part-time jobs, doing a lot of volunteering at youth projects and at museums and trying to make time for my boyfriend and friends. The gym time fell by the wayside a little bit while I tried to prioritise other things and I crept back up to 12 stones. I started to feel uncomfortable there, though, so I had to take control again.

It has meant giving up a lot of the volunteering I was doing in order to fit in gym time which I feel bad about but there just isn't enough hours in the day to do the PhD, work, volunteer and see my friends and family now and again if I want to fit in gym time as well, so something had to give.

RhonndaJ

I can't speak to why I was fat as a child, but why I regained after losing so much in my early twenties? Mental illness and flat out denial.

The depression/anxiety had me comfort eating every evening and the best food was high fat, for both it was all about that fleeting good feeling that came with the taste. But it was fleeting, so I had to have more and more and more. Part of me knew I was doing this. The other part of me determinedly ignored the awareness.

Which takes me to denial. It's not that I didn't know that I was getting fatter and fatter. I did. But I could still do all the things I wanted to do, mostly, and I convinced myself that I didn't want to do those things I thought that I probably couldn't do with the added weight. And since I didn't see myself as being limited by my weight in any way, why stop?

Except I knew where I was headed. I can remember going for my yearly with my GP and actually wanting them to find something wrong because I thought that somehow that would be what it took to convince me to get my act together. But nothing. Good cholesterol, good BP, no sign of diabetes, nothing except my own usual quirky blood results. Not even the fact that when I took the stress test I couldn't manage even three minutes on the darned treadmill was effective. I was healthy as a horse, just fat.

Even now, the health risks involved with obesity don't click as a viable concern for me. I know they are. Maybe not the BP or the cholesterol or diabetes. But the other ones are there. They just don't seem 'real' to me.

What turned the tide for me if all this didn't? I'm not really certain, but I think it has to do with an unconscious realisation that if I kept going the way I was, it wasn't going to be long before there would be things I'd really want to do, and couldn't.

Edited to add: And I just don't like anyone saying that I can't do something, even if it's my own body.

lacroyx

I was fat all my life. Because I didn't understand even the basics. I never knew anything about BMR, TDEE, calories, sodium, carbs, exercise calories etc.

I'd happily consume coke, sandwiches sit on my *kitten* playing video games for years on end with no exercise.

I actually hated people that ate fruits and vegetables and went to gym and worried about their weight. Non smokers, non drinkers. Non gamers. They were noobs, idiots. Sheeple. People that were vain stuck up fools that only cared about their looks because of propaganda fashion on TV. That was how I actually thought. That was how I got to 300lb. Apathy, ignorance and denial.

If I knew then what I know now. I never would have got that big. Now that I understand this stuff, sure I binge sometimes. But generally I'm trending toward massive weight loss. And I know in 4-8 months I will reach my goal and go beyond that.

I got on my old mountain bike and vowed to ride that b*tch out until the wheels fall off ❤ lol

I wish I was that mountain bike.

Same for me just minus the "I hate people that go to the gym/eat veggies/etc etc." part. I messed up my back in my early 20's and it was pretty much down hill from there. PC/Video games all day, everyday along with fast food and soda pop for all of my meals. No physical activity at all. I avoided it completely since it hurt my back. I did a 180 and changed when I found out I had diabetes type II Dec. 2009.

Alma_Sana

Emotional binge eating and fast food. Now I'm starting to feel my feelings instead of eat them lol

drusilla126

I worked morning radio. That and emotional eating. Eating when I was bored. Yup it was a never ending cycle of bad...until I got fired and then life got better.

Griannee

I ate unhealthy things when I felt like ****, which was a lot of the time. With my mental illness I had a bad relationship with food too. I've always been heavier, but not overweight like I am now. A lot of the weight I put on was cause of meds or the meds that made me hungry like mad.

I'm finally losing weight cause I want to be healthy. I want to have children in a few years and am scared that I won't be able to if I don't take better care of my body.

rml_16

I've never been that heavy. At my highest, I was a size 12. For me, it was a matter of having been naturally thin my entire life. I never had to worry about what I ate and I never had to exercise and I was a size 3. As I aged, though, my metabolic rate slowed down and I started gaining and it was a matter of having to figure out HOW to lose weight and keep it off. If you never had to do it, you don't know what to change.

Thankfully, I figured it out.

steadk

I knew i was bigger than most my age, but i was happy. Then, being fat was a shield so that i wouldnt be hurt any more. Now, its about being here for my little girl and my hubby. I don't want to be this way anymore, but I have to accept where I'm at, if that makes sense. I know it's not going to happen overnight, so why be upset with the progress i've made?
I hope your brother sees that he can be happy and enjoy life without being big.

alpine1994

I was a really skinny kid until my brother was born when I was 9. I noticed that I didn't have to ask for snacks anymore. I could just take them because my mom and stepdad were busy with the baby. A second brother came 3 years later and the trend continued. Also, I would have 2 dinners!! One at the babysitter, and one when I got home. Continue through high school eating pizza and fries for lunch every day, and of course college...and here we are. Looking back, it's crazy that I let myself get that way, and that my mom wasn't trying to teach me better eating habits. She is really tiny and never had a weight problem. I don't blame her at all for anything, but I know good nutrition is something I need to focus on with my future kids.