Has it clicked in your head yet?

lisamarie2181

I am sure I'm not alone in this, dieting, losing weight, gaining, losing, and usually feeling like it will never come off for good. Trying this way of eating or that way, wondering if the diet was unsuccessful or my lack of effort was the problem. In the past all I cared about was losing the weight. No matter what it was I've tried it, and most likely damaging my body in so many ways. I hit my highest weight of 305, went on nutrisystem, lost 60 lbs, went off and fell off, went back up to 275, lost 35 from diet and exercise and then stress and life got the best of me and at the end of last year fell off again and went back up to 270. After feeling like a complete failure yet again, i reconnected with a friend from high school who happens to b a trainer now and he changed my life in more ways then he probably knows. For the first time I had help and learned how to ask for it. I held myself accountable to him and did as he told me to, but still struggled to believe that my accomplishments were enough. Who were they not enough for? ME. I have been dieting all my life and everytime i had success, somewhere in the back of my head was that thought that it will be short lived and i would never get to my goal. I would never have the life i want because i am not strong enough to conquer this. I went in everytime w the thought of failure and never realized what a huge problem this was. And then my trainer sat me down and told me the simplest concept but probably the hardest thing to do - learn to love yourself and realize you are worthy of a happy healthy life. And then it CLICKED. I am the one getting in my way. My fear of the unknown and being successful is getting in my way. It wasnt my lack of knowledge of dieting because at the point i was 40lbs down and feeling better then i ever have. I found a way of eating that i can do for a lifetime and so much knowledge on whats best for me. All along its never been the diet, or the exercise, it has always been my mind. I AM the one who sabotages myself, I AM the one who thinks i am not good enough. I AM the one constantly getting in my way.

As i keep going on this journey the mind has made progress. I know now i am worth this. I am worth being happy and being successful in the things that i want. I am the one that has the strength to know that even if something isnt good for me and i can still lose weight, i now choose not to eat it because i know it will keep where i have always been in the past. I now have a different relationship with food. It is something i look to for fuel and nutrition and not something as a pleasure. I have learned to cook healthy and nutritious and learned that healthy food is awesome and not a nightmare. Do i still struggle at times? Of course, i am but only a human. But they are becoming way fewer and far between and all those bad foods that were treats and comforts are now becoming a reminder of the unhappy girl i used to be. I dont need them in my life and they are not doing anything good for me. All these things take time to realize and the longer i am on this journey the more knowledge i will gain. All of this because it finally CLICKED. I have the strength and knowledge to do this the right way and to go the distance and get it done this time. I am finally starting to love myslf for who i am and all the amazingthings i have accomplished so far.

So i ask you all if your still with me, when did it click for you or if it hasnt, what do you see as your hurdle to climb to get there? Does your mind play a huge factor in your journey? I would love to hear others experiences when they finally stopped dieting and finally learned that this is for life, that this is the path that will finally bring you to happiness.

I love to hear from you all

prayerseeker

so how do you post on a message board as the starting person? I want to help people get motivated too but don't know enough about the site

prayerseeker

WOW have you been looking in my mirror? This is exactly how I feel...the yoyo of life...and I have to learn to love myself and have joy in my small accomplishments.

simonlcube

It sounds like you are further down this road than me. I sometimes feel there is this self-destructive part of me that does not want to succeed. I just don't yet feel I have entirely managed to get it out of my system.

Thank you for your post.

RainHoward

Weight loss is 90% mental and 50% hard work and dedication.

amy_kee

WOW have you been looking in my mirror? This is exactly how I feel...the yoyo of life...and I have to learn to love myself and have joy in my small accomplishments.

Go to Community,
Click on the Main Forum Topic you want to start a new thread in
Then click on the green button on the top right,...I believe it says something like new topic

reddi2roll

so how do you post on a message board as the starting person? I want to help people get motivated too but don't know enough about the site

Go to the community tab at the top of the page, pick a thread and click on new topic and start typing.

lisamarie2181

so how do you post on a message board as the starting person? I want to help people get motivated too but don't know enough about the site

When you go into a topic like motivation and support, there should b a green button at the top right that says post topic or something like that and just write away

GAsoulstar

I commend you for being honest with yourself and understanding that it is lifetime journey that you are on. We are going to have good and bad days, but in life we have to learn to pick ourselves up and more forward. I always tell myself that this is a daily process....being mentally focus helps us become physical focus. Move forward and work harder each day is the only thing we can do.

Mistila

You have made a huge step, I am told and told and told to accept yourself but I can't get it it doesn't click!!!???

Irish_eyes75

I also did Nutrisystem a few years ago and lost 50lbs using their guidelines but cooking my own food (i couldn't last more than a month microwaving all my meals - I love to cook too much)

I went from 244 to 195 then I moved back to my hometown expecting to be much happier "home" but it was a major crash and burn for several reasons and over the last couple of years I shot up to 260.
I don't know why exactly it "clicked" for me but a little over a month ago it felt like the fog had lifted so to speak and I had just had it with myself. I decided now was the time to knock it off and stop waiting around for life to become what I want it to be and to go out and make it what I want it to be.

lisamarie2181

It sounds like you are further down this road than me. I sometimes feel there is this self-destructive part of me that does not want to succeed. I just don't yet feel I have entirely managed to get it out of my system.

Thank you for your post.

Ah the self sabotage! I still struggle with it but i think the first step is acknowledging you are doing it. So often we fail and blame it on the diet or not the right workouts, it is always something other then ourselves. This one is probably the toughest to break, and my only advice is just keep pushing forward. If you fall off get back on and keep going. The only way to beat it is to prove yourself wrong. Everyone is goingto falter at times and have bad days, weeks, months, but you only fail if you atop trying. There is no time frame for this, there is no competition. This is your journey and you jeed to get every bit of the experience to not only lose weight but change your life. If the mind doesnt change, the body never will. Thats why i feel so many people gain back because the mind is still working. There is a reason people that are successful and keep the weight off for good. It isnt because they have more willpower. It is because they finally realized no one can do this but me. No one can give me a happy life but me.

Keep on your journey and fight the difficult times, you will get there eventually, and i wish you the best of luck on all your goals and commend you for the success so far. Just starting the journey is a huge accomplishment in and of itself

Crochetluvr

That's great that you found someone to give you that edge and help you along!

I have been a yo-yo dieter since I was a young adult. I have tried many diets in the past...WW, Jenny Craig, prescription diet pills, starvation, etc. I have been thin, I have been fat. I have been less fat...I have been more fat. I was SO used to being that way that I was beginning to think it was a useless cause to try and get myself thin once and for all. I can say, for sure, that coming HERE was a huge factor in my current success. Having a support system.....the people AND the tools.....is something I never really had before, as well as a program that didn't set me up for failure.

Its not like I had an AHA moment. I just realize now that I CAN do this. I think the fact that I have seen steady progress over the summer and I spent so much of that time concentrating on my weight that my attitude has become more of a natural habit now than something I really have to work at. I get up every morning and I KNOW what I have to do...I don't have to do much thinking about it. And since this is not a point A to point B journey, but a forever thing, getting into a behavioral habit was a necessity.

I still have a long way to go but I am not too far from halfway to my goal. And I love the person on the outside I am becoming.

lisamarie2181

You have made a huge step, I am told and told and told to accept yourself but I can't get it it doesn't click!!!???

i feel you so much because i know how hard it is, and like i said im not perfect, i still slip up, but i am now able to stop myself before things get to far and i put back on a bunch of weight. This is the first time in my life i havent slid back and i have been struggling the past few weeks and have just maintained. Do i hare the fact that i feel i have wasted weeks with no progress? For sure, but i no longer beat myself up for it. I try and work with the mental things and push past them and get my focus back. If i dont i will forever be stuck this unhappy girl, and that is definitely where i dont want to be.

Dont give up, keep coming here for support and staying engage, having all these wonderful people on here will help you to realize you do have the support to get this done and they will be here whether you have success or you falter. Even if u may struggle, as long as you keep getting back up and trying is amazing. And you are worth it

lisamarie2181

I also did Nutrisystem a few years ago and lost 50lbs using their guidelines but cooking my own food (i couldn't last more than a month microwaving all my meals - I love to cook too much)

I went from 244 to 195 then I moved back to my hometown expecting to be much happier "home" but it was a major crash and burn for several reasons and over the last couple of years I shot up to 260.
I don't know why exactly it "clicked" for me but a little over a month ago it felt like the fog had lifted so to speak and I had just had it with myself. I decided now was the time to knock it off and stop waiting around for life to become what I want it to be and to go out and make it what I want it to be.

That is so awesome and i bet you feel great too! Keep staying strong and i wish you much happiness and success on your journey! Thank you so much for sharing

DawnieB1977

I think sometimes I fear what it'll be like when/if I get to my goal, and I can't actually picture being thin in my head. Although I was thin once, and even then I thought I was fat, so I guess I will always see a fat girl in the mirror.

I have also been up and down in weight. I was really overweight as a teenager (sadly genetics, becuase I didn't overeat, and I did exercise) but lost weight when I went to university, and then when i started working after. By age 24 I was 5 clothes sizes (we do sizes in 2s in the UK, so like 8, 10, 12 etc) smaller than when I started university at age 18.

Then I met my now husband at 25, and moved in with him at 26 then did my teacher training which was pretty stressful. The weight started to creep back on, and when I got engaged on my 30th birthday I was bigger again (although not as big as when I was 18). So I lost 45lbs for my wedding, and looked good (I was a US size 8/10), but then I was pregnant a month later (planned) and despite going to the gym until 34 weeks pregnant I still put on weight. So after i had my son I started exercising again, and I lost it all. When he was 1 I got pregnant again, and all the weight came back on and more!

Now my daughter is 15 months and I am smaller than when I got married, so probably a US size 8/10 again, but in different proportions. My hips are a lot smaller now, but my boobs are still bigger. My aim is to be a US size 6/8 (which I used to be), but I want to be toned and fit.

Although I can squeeze myself into those size 8 trousers, I want them to be loose!

I think the weight loss/exercise things has definitely clicked though as I make good choices without even thinking about it, and I miss exercise if I don't do it. It helps having young children because you have to be active, and I am also very conscious of what they eat, because we all eat the same meals.

caitdev

Thanks for the hopeful messages. I'm not there yet, but as I read the messages on this site, I am beginning to believe that I can get there.

butterflylover527

Love this! I am not nearly that far yet mentally Hope to be there soon though!

Mandeez77

My clicking moment was just a month ago. I was talking with a friend about how just a few years back I had lost 60 lbs. Adding it up, it was TEN years ago. I felt so stupid that I had been doing nothing but talking about getting into shape. It was embarrassing. I've lost 8 lbs this month doing Insanity: Asylum. I've completely changed the way I eat and feel amazing. Enough talk!!

lisamarie2181

I think sometimes I fear what it'll be like when/if I get to my goal, and I can't actually picture being thin in my head. Although I was thin once, and even then I thought I was fat, so I guess I will always see a fat girl in the mirror.

I have also been up and down in weight. I was really overweight as a teenager (sadly genetics, becuase I didn't overeat, and I did exercise) but lost weight when I went to university, and then when i started working after. By age 24 I was 5 clothes sizes (we do sizes in 2s in the UK, so like 8, 10, 12 etc) smaller than when I started university at age 18.

Then I met my now husband at 25, and moved in with him at 26 then did my teacher training which was pretty stressful. The weight started to creep back on, and when I got engaged on my 30th birthday I was bigger again (although not as big as when I was 18). So I lost 45lbs for my wedding, and looked good (I was a US size 8/10), but then I was pregnant a month later (planned) and despite going to the gym until 34 weeks pregnant I still put on weight. So after i had my son I started exercising again, and I lost it all. When he was 1 I got pregnant again, and all the weight came back on and more!

Now my daughter is 15 months and I am smaller than when I got married, so probably a US size 8/10 again, but in different proportions. My hips are a lot smaller now, but my boobs are still bigger. My aim is to be a US size 6/8 (which I used to be), but I want to be toned and fit.

Although I can squeeze myself into those size 8 trousers, I want them to be loose!

I think the weight loss/exercise things has definitely clicked though as I make good choices without even thinking about it, and I miss exercise if I don't do it. It helps having young children because you have to be active, and I am also very conscious of what they eat, because we all eat the same meals.

dawnie i have those same fears too! Is my life really going to be what i expected when i finally reach my goal? In alot of ways i am sure it wont be lol but it probably will be in alot of ways i probably never thought of. And i know the only way for me to have my happy ending is to finally realize how great i really am and if i set my mind to something i can accomplish it! I may not do it the first time or the second but if i dont give up then i will get there!

Thank you so much for your post and sharing w me

I hope your having a great weekend!

lisamarie2181

My clicking moment was just a month ago. I was talking with a friend about how just a few years back I had lost 60 lbs. Adding it up, it was TEN years ago. I felt so stupid that I had been doing nothing but talking about getting into shape. It was embarrassing. I've lost 8 lbs this month doing Insanity: Asylum. I've completely changed the way I eat and feel amazing. Enough talk!!

That is amazing, you should be so proud! And good luck with the insanity i heard its a tough one but awesome!! Keep staying strong

slim_photographer

I have a more extensive opinion but just to bump the thread, I can tell you this right now. I have done the same. Up and down with weight loss and gained it back and then some.
It's definetly a process. I don't know if it's clicked for me but I can tell you that I don't think I will be done this time. That has been the pitfall in the past. "It is my goal to get down to x" so I got there and I was done. So I went back to eating lots of unhealthy stuff.
Not this time. I understand that I need to be concious of eating well and staying active now and 10 years from now and when I'm 60,70 or however long God allows me to live.
For some people that is a sad realization but it doesn't have to be. I guess when you find out you can do it for life it clicks. I probably will feel like that when I get down to 214 and then to 199.

MyM0wM0w

I am sure I'm not alone in this, dieting, losing weight, gaining, losing, and usually feeling like it will never come off for good. Trying this way of eating or that way, wondering if the diet was unsuccessful or my lack of effort was the problem

Imo the answer is in the question.

It has "clicked" for me because now I realize this isn't a diet. I now know that it's the way the rest of my life has to be. I don't mean "OMG, I have to do Nutrisystem, or Atkins, or Jenny Craig for the rest of my life. I mean that I have to chose healthy carbs, healthy fats, healthy/lean proteins and eat balanced healthy meals 3 times a day as a rule. I can have occasional blow outs but they have to be occasional. I can have things like ice cream and cookies....as long as they are not the rule and I account for it in my day (orwork out harder to make up for it).

It's a cliche for a reason...it's true. This isn't a diet, it's a lifestyle.

lisamarie2181

I have a more extensive opinion but just to bump the thread, I can tell you this right now. I have done the same. Up and down with weight loss and gained it back and then some.
It's definetly a process. I don't know if it's clicked for me but I can tell you that I don't think I will be done this time. That has been the pitfall in the past. "It is my goal to get down to x" so I got there and I was done. So I went back to eating lots of unhealthy stuff.
Not this time. I understand that I need to be concious of eating well and staying active now and 10 years from now and when I'm 60,70 or however long God allows me to live.
For some people that is a sad realization but it doesn't have to be. I guess when you find out you can do it for life it clicks. I probably will feel like that when I get down to 214 and then to 199.

just keep having faith and you will get there. I still have a long way on my journey, but I am the smallest I have been in about 10 years. My goal is to get to 145 (eventually), but pushing forward to get under 200 first. That is my goal I have had for years and I am getting closer and closer. I will suggest too if you have not done it yet, take pictures! That has definitely helped me in getting to where I am mentally. You see yourself everyday, and you don't see all the changes that everyone else is seeing. It is amazing when you get to see in a picture how far you have actually come.

Just keep reminding yourself you can do this, you have gotten this far and every step you take to changing your life is a healthier, active step then yesterday and all those steps are going to add up into one strong powerful person

lisamarie2181

I am sure I'm not alone in this, dieting, losing weight, gaining, losing, and usually feeling like it will never come off for good. Trying this way of eating or that way, wondering if the diet was unsuccessful or my lack of effort was the problem

Imo the answer is in the question.

It has "clicked" for me because now I realize this isn't a diet. I now know that it's the way the rest of my life has to be. I don't mean "OMG, I have to do Nutrisystem, or Atkins, or Jenny Craig for the rest of my life. I mean that I have to chose healthy carbs, healthy fats, healthy/lean proteins and eat balanced healthy meals 3 times a day as a rule. I can have occasional blow outs but they have to be occasional. I can have things like ice cream and cookies....as long as they are not the rule and I account for it in my day (orwork out harder to make up for it).

It's a cliche for a reason...it's true. This isn't a diet, it's a lifestyle.

So true! Congrats on "seeing the light" and i wish you great success on the rest of your journey and everything after

DawnieB1977

I am sure I'm not alone in this, dieting, losing weight, gaining, losing, and usually feeling like it will never come off for good. Trying this way of eating or that way, wondering if the diet was unsuccessful or my lack of effort was the problem

Imo the answer is in the question.

It has "clicked" for me because now I realize this isn't a diet. I now know that it's the way the rest of my life has to be. I don't mean "OMG, I have to do Nutrisystem, or Atkins, or Jenny Craig for the rest of my life. I mean that I have to chose healthy carbs, healthy fats, healthy/lean proteins and eat balanced healthy meals 3 times a day as a rule. I can have occasional blow outs but they have to be occasional. I can have things like ice cream and cookies....as long as they are not the rule and I account for it in my day (orwork out harder to make up for it).

It's a cliche for a reason...it's true. This isn't a diet, it's a lifestyle.

Yes, that's it, it's a lifestyle, not a fad diet. This is why I love My Fitness Pal and would never do Slimming World or Weight Watchers, or something like Lighter Life or the Cambridge Diet. I think you just reach a point where it's natural to want something healthy (and to be honest I was never a fan of junk or convenience food anyway, thanks to a healthy upbringing).

I think it's also fine to have a treat occasionally, because there is no 'I can have a treat when this diet ends' because it won't end, the healthy lifestyle is forever, and life would be pretty dull if you couldn't have a treat now and again.

Becca_007

bump

Hearts_2015

Looking forward to catching up on this thread when I have a bit more time. Glad you all posted:flowerforyou:

29andfat

I'm not sure I can say that it's definitely clicked yet, more like it's just started to click, in the last month. Like a really slow-motion click! It's taken me 15 years of yo-yo dieting to realise that I can't crash diet my way into losing 70lbs. I used to get so annoyed when people would talk about lifestyle changes. I HATED it. As far as I was concerned, the lifestyle change they were talking about meant giving up one of the few pleasures I had in life, eating. I love eating. I love delicious food! All I wanted to do was find a quick fix, maybe eat healthily for a while to drop the weight, and then get back to eating the things I want, perhaps being a little bit more careful.

And I always hoped that would work. I was certainly never interested in making a permanent change. But, recently I've finally started to accept that that is exactly what I have to do and I have a completely different mindset about things now. And I've also realised that if you make changes gradually enough, your taste in food changes. I never understood people who said they LOVED eating healthily, and how delicious healthy food was. I thought that was complete nonsense! But I've been making changes to my diet for several weeks now, and I'm actually starting to understand what they mean. Once a while I'll have something unhealthy, something I would previously have enjoyed a lot - and it just doesn't satisfy me any more. It's been a huge revelation to me that healthy food CAN be delicious!

I have my first weekly weigh-in tomorrow. The old me would be aiming for some huge loss in my first week (because that's what everyone expects and hopes for, right?), but the new me will just be absolutely overjoyed if I have the tiniest loss at all. And the new me won't give up if I don't have a loss.

I guess that's how it's clicked for me - I feel like I'm more mature in my attitude towards food, my expectations are more realistic and I finally feel like I'm capable of coping with setbacks. Having said all this, I'm still at the very beginning of my weight loss journey. But I hope now I have this new mindset, I'll actually succeed this time!...