Don't Lie It's ticking me off!!!!

ashesfromfire

*One last rant post before calling it a night*

I have been - quite literally - been working my but off to lose weight. I've dropped 25 pounds so far (17 since joining MFP). Every meal I eat is planned and considered, my portions are reasonable, but vastly different from how I used to eat. I don't seem to manage to work out every single day, but I certainly do the majority of them - all in all I've reinvented my entire life.
MY COMPLAINT: My very over weight, lazy brother I live with announced that he was going to lose 100 pounds this year. I was happy for this commitment and offered him some of the healthy yummy dinner I was making, which he quickly declined. Next thing I know he brings in a large pizza and two litter of soda and consumes the entire thing. Two days later, after watching him devour a large package of fried chicken I asked him how his weight loss plan was going. He smiled up and in all seriousness says, "great, I've lost 10 pounds so far!" We happen to work together and he goes to work every few days talking about all the weight he's lost and yadda yadda, while not making one damn effort - and everyone eats it up and asks me how proud I am of him and I swear I just want to punch him in the face.
I AM WORKING MY HEART OUT TO GET HEALTHY!!!!!! I don't need praise or compliments or glory, but it's killing me watching someone parade around basking in it while continuing habits that I'm pretty sure are going to kill him!!!!!!!!!
Has anyone else gone through anything like this?

EDIT: Apparently I didn't make this clear HE HASN'T ACTUALLY DROPPED ONE SINGLE POUND! HE'S LYING!!! TO EVERYONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

tmauck4472

I'm sure it's irritating but are you sure the scale for him is actually going down? He may just be pulling everyone's leg, give it time to see if his clothes are getting to big for him, then you'll know the truth of it. I can't see him losing eating like that.

Don't get discouraged, let him show off while you just keep on doing what your doing.

Sly_Blue

It'll get harder later. Plus he's a guy and has a quicker metabolism.

Chin up and relax.

You are getting healthy, he's getting lighter but not increasing his life span.

Also whining about it won't help a bit- just be supportive.

jodi41086

I agree its hard, but one day when his arteries are screaming he'll realize. I do miss fried chicken, may have to find my baked fried chicken recipe again. its not as unhealthy as deep fried but is still super crunchy. I have a bunch of friends that say I am obsessed with exercise. Its not that im obsessed but if I don't workout I feel tired and grouchy. I don't feel like myself unless i lace my shoes up and get going :O) Speaking of !! Off to the gym. hope your brother realizes sooner then later

Sherbog

Yes...something close to your complaint. A friend had surgery and tells others she lost her weight through hard work, exercise, and dieting. Just be honest. The surgery journey is difficult one from what I have heard so why lie! So when I have to listen to her talk like an expert on dieting and control now it is frustrating.

ashesfromfire

I'm sure it's irritating but are you sure the scale for him is actually going down? He may just be pulling everyone's leg, give it time to see if his clothes are getting to big for him, then you'll know the truth of it. I can't see him losing eating like that.

Don't get discouraged, let him show off while you just keep on doing what your doing.

That's my point! He hasn't lost one single pound - hadn't put one ounce of effort into it either. Just wants to be praised for doing so I guess....I'm not sure I understand exactly why he's doing (only, without sounding conceded I think it's because I've been losing and succeeding)

luciousone

I think we all know someone who lies about how much they have lost, and what they have eaten, just to keep up with you or to make themselves feel better, but in the long run, they are lying to themselves and won't have the fabulous results you will. I swear that one guy I knew was actually telling people he had lost weight in kilos, but when the truth came out, he had lost the amount in pounds. This was the same guy who would go to make drinks, and whilst at the drinks machine, would scoff 2 packets of crisps, so that he wasn't seen eating by his work colleagues, but seeing as he stank of salt and vinegar, we all knew. Liars are only hurting themselves-you keep going and feel virtuous about it. Your health will benefit frm it in the long run.

DoomCakes

Wow, I don't blame you. I'd be more sad than mad though. Because he's killing himself in food. I mean, that large pizza and two liter of soda is enough calories for 2 days right there just about, or one if his calorie needs are high enough. But even if he's in his calorie needs there's a lot of sodium and sugar in all that too that's not going to aide in his weight loss, or health, either. I understand your frustration though. I dislike people who eat crappy food and say they've been losing weight and bragging. I'm no perfect eater, but I've made HUGE changes in my life choices and work hard to keep them in practice. Do I slip, yea, but not as bad as I used to. I might indulge in A cookie, not a box. I even work hard finding healthier alternatives for my sweet, salty, or crunchy tooth! But then I see people who eat crap, and say they are doing fantastic. It's saddening.

dutchman24

Sounds like your brother is talking the talk, but not walking the walk. Ignor him. Your results will do your talking for you! I'm sure by now people have noticed...and complimented you.

dhakiyya

If he's got 100+ lbs to lose then yes it will be easier for him to lose them, and still have room for treats like pizza. That's just how it is, the more you have to lose, the easier it is to lose.

Maybe you see him eating his treat food because he wants to eat it and be sociable, while the rest of the time he's being more disciplined. If he's that big he can still eat a LOT of calories and lose weight. This won't last forever of course, as the more he loses the less he'll need to eat to be able to carry on losing fat. Then you'll see if he's really determined and good at planning treats, or if he's really lazy. If it's the latter he'll give up. If it's the former he'll step up his game when he needs to.

Rachlmale

You live and work with your brother? Good grief, the very sound of him breathing would get on my nerves let alone watching him apparently lose weight quicker than me whilst still eating terribly.

He won't be losing weight, if he is it'll just be a coincidence. After a while nobody will care because let's face it, he won't be losing weight.

Concentrate on your own thing you're doing very well. If he's happy about eating badly and remaining overweight then that is his choice there's not a lot you can say. I'd just ignore anything to do with his eating habits or weight loss (unless there is a drastic change).

vjrose

Just keep on trucking, you are doing it right and I know it's irritating (my hubby dropped 10 lbs in a month by just giving up one snack a day). Some guys are good at the junk food diet for awhile but when they hit their first plateau they tend to just go back to their old ways going "well dieting is a waste of time". Sadly his food choices will likely catch up with him sooner or later and you will need to be there to be supportive instead of saying I told you so. Then he'll be looking to you for healthy leadership.

justal313

I am learning to fly. Not a plane but like superman with the power of my mind. I flew 5 minutes yesterday. Pretty soon I'll be able to fly to work and not be stuck in traffic. I need to get a compass so I don't have to fly over the highway to find my way to work.



Doesn't make it true sadly, traffic sucks..

tenaheff

If he is lying the praise will eventually die a natural death. When he doesn't become smaller, people will notice.

sho3girl

I'm sure it's irritating but are you sure the scale for him is actually going down? He may just be pulling everyone's leg, give it time to see if his clothes are getting to big for him, then you'll know the truth of it. I can't see him losing eating like that.

Don't get discouraged, let him show off while you just keep on doing what your doing.

That's my point! He hasn't lost one single pound - hadn't put one ounce of effort into it either. Just wants to be praised for doing so I guess....I'm not sure I understand exactly why he's doing (only, without sounding conceded I think it's because I've been losing and succeeding)

I would try to let this whole thing go under your feet (not over you head) surely people will see he's got getting any smaller/lighter and then everyone will know he's just fibbing. Don't let someone else discourageYOU :flowerforyou:

KombuchaCat

He's only doing a disservice to himself. You can only control what you do, keep up the good work and try not to worry about what he does or does not actually do. Perhaps if you continue to be a positive role model he will actually put his money where his mouth is.

AJ_Pete

Sooner or later, it'll show that he's lost nothing.

"Gee, you've lost 70 lbs but are still a 56" waist?"

Give it time..... let it simmer....

mdbs2004

Not sure why your worrying about your brother? He can make his own decisions. You should be proud of yourself. What I would be pissed about is bringing that crap into the house. I don't have very good will power. If you bring that crap into the house I will eat it. So I don't allow it and I can get perty grumpy if you bring it in.

ninerbuff

Even with junk food, if he's in calorie deficit he's probably losing weight. The first several pounds will usually be water. If he's just indulging a day or 2 out of the week and eating fine the rest of the time, I see this as a more livable way to maintain weight. People who regain their weight most likely changed everything in the way they ate, lost it, missed foods they enjoyed eating, started eating it again and regained.
I don't tell my clients to diet. I tell them to make sure they meet their macro/micro nutrient profile, then if they have calories left over from their limit, to eat whatever they want, but make sure not to go over. Since doing it this way, the regain factor for my clients is almost non existent because they have now learned to still consume the foods they like without weight regain.
Health isn't just about food. You can eat as healthy as you want, but if you don't exercise, reduce stress, get enough rest, and basically aren't happy (emotionally) then you probably aren't more healthy than before with the exception of better eating habits.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

leejayem

I can see how that would be very frustrating. But the thought came to me that your brother sounds like he's desperately seeking attention so if you can try & feel pity for him - his actions sound very pathetic really & maybe you can be a good influence on him by your example of truly looking after your body. YOU are doing a great job so don't let his attention seeking antics detract from your success. A person who makes a habit of lying gets nowhere in the long run so don't be dragged down by what he's doing.:flowerforyou:

JenniBaby85

You said he's lying, and that would definitely tick me off. More so than if he just had a fast metabolism and could eat anything and lose weight just by walking a mile a day. (I can't say I'm fond of that either ). Call him on it maybe?

ashesfromfire

Even with junk food, if he's in calorie deficit he's probably losing weight. The first several pounds will usually be water. If he's just indulging a day or 2 out of the week and eating fine the rest of the time, I see this as a more livable way to maintain weight. People who regain their weight most likely changed everything in the way they ate, lost it, missed foods they enjoyed eating, started eating it again and regained.
I don't tell my clients to diet. I tell them to make sure they meet their macro/micro nutrient profile, then if they have calories left over from their limit, to eat whatever they want, but make sure not to go over. Since doing it this way, the regain factor for my clients is almost non existent because they have now learned to still consume the foods they like without weight regain.
Health isn't just about food. You can eat as healthy as you want, but if you don't exercise, reduce stress, get enough rest, and basically aren't happy (emotionally) then you probably aren't more healthy than before with the exception of better eating habits.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

I seem to not be getting across that he's making it all up. We live and work together - I see him way more often than need be said. He claimed to lose 10 pounds in 3 days eating like this. Not allowing himself things he enjoys from time to time - but eating every single meal in the portions that would serve a family of four! and the most exercise he's getting is rolling over while he sleeps on the couch.

Poorgirls_Diet

If he's got 100+ lbs to lose then yes it will be easier for him to lose them, and still have room for treats like pizza. That's just how it is, the more you have to lose, the easier it is to lose.

I would have to disagree with this as I started this journey with 200lbs to lose and I have lost 32lbs, losing those 32lbs were definitely not easy they were dang hard with allot of hard work, sweat and pain. So regardless if a person has to lose 10lbs or 200lbs we put in what we are prepared to take out. Either way we all have to work our *kitten* off.

It really annoys me when certain people categorize others based on their size and their capabilities. I don't eat pizza every day because if I did I would gain everything back that I lost.

leejayem

Even with junk food, if he's in calorie deficit he's probably losing weight. The first several pounds will usually be water. If he's just indulging a day or 2 out of the week and eating fine the rest of the time, I see this as a more livable way to maintain weight. People who regain their weight most likely changed everything in the way they ate, lost it, missed foods they enjoyed eating, started eating it again and regained.
I don't tell my clients to diet. I tell them to make sure they meet their macro/micro nutrient profile, then if they have calories left over from their limit, to eat whatever they want, but make sure not to go over. Since doing it this way, the regain factor for my clients is almost non existent because they have now learned to still consume the foods they like without weight regain.
Health isn't just about food. You can eat as healthy as you want, but if you don't exercise, reduce stress, get enough rest, and basically aren't happy (emotionally) then you probably aren't more healthy than before with the exception of better eating habits.
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

zyxst

As someone who has a jerkface, lying brother, I would just punch him. :drinker:

witchy_wife

Sooner or later, it'll show that he's lost nothing.

"Gee, you've lost 70 lbs but are still a 56" waist?"

Give it time..... let it simmer....

Yeah exactly this. When you have over 100lb to lose you can get away with saying you have lost 10-20lbs..... but when he starts saying 50-60 but isn't noticably different.... people will know.

ninerbuff

Even with junk food, if he's in calorie deficit he's probably losing weight. The first several pounds will usually be water. If he's just indulging a day or 2 out of the week and eating fine the rest of the time, I see this as a more livable way to maintain weight. People who regain their weight most likely changed everything in the way they ate, lost it, missed foods they enjoyed eating, started eating it again and regained.
I don't tell my clients to diet. I tell them to make sure they meet their macro/micro nutrient profile, then if they have calories left over from their limit, to eat whatever they want, but make sure not to go over. Since doing it this way, the regain factor for my clients is almost non existent because they have now learned to still consume the foods they like without weight regain.
Health isn't just about food. You can eat as healthy as you want, but if you don't exercise, reduce stress, get enough rest, and basically aren't happy (emotionally) then you probably aren't more healthy than before with the exception of better eating habits.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

I seem to not be getting across that he's making it all up. We live and work together - I see him way more often than need be said. He claimed to lose 10 pounds in 3 days eating like this. Not allowing himself things he enjoys from time to time - but eating every single meal in the portions that would serve a family of four! and the most exercise he's getting is rolling over while he sleeps on the couch.

Then call him out for making it all up. Really the only person he's hurting is himself. I get clients that tell me they are doing fine with eating, but when I don't see any change in their physique or body weight, I'll call them on it. They eventually confess that they probably aren't following the eating regimen as consistently as they should.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

hughtwalker

Brothers are born to be annoying. I know - I have one and I am one. However, he is the only one I have. [we have a sister but she isn't annoying]

You don't want him to suffer the consequences of all that unhealthy food, which is highly commendable BUT you are doing the 'suffering' and 'self-mortification' while he is taking vicarious credit on his say-so alone. How galling!
BUT the waist band and tape-measure won't lie. He risks being exposed to your colleagues at work as a bragging charlatan.

So, how about:
When people ask you how proud you are of him you could say, "Of course"- and how good it would be to start a slimming club at work - there probably are a few others who could benefit from dropping a stone or two - and they wouldn't have to pay slimming club membership fees. (?)

Set up one day each week as "(Public) Weigh-in day" and take in the scales that day and keep a progress chart. Do you have a notice board to display this PERMANENTLY for all to see?

That way, if 'Someone' is lying then he will be found out and will be forced to either shut up or put up.

Just a thought.

Antlady69

Sorry for insulting your brother but ...

Men = peacocks. They can't live without the adoration of others.

Fact of life. You just have to accept it. #ManBashing

BeeElMarvin

I seem to not be getting across that he's making it all up. We live and work together - I see him way more often than need be said. He claimed to lose 10 pounds in 3 days eating like this. Not allowing himself things he enjoys from time to time - but eating every single meal in the portions that would serve a family of four! and the most exercise he's getting is rolling over while he sleeps on the couch.

Then don't sweat it. It will all become very obvious soon enough. When I first lost, I lost pants sizes before I lost pounds. If he's not doing anything - if he's not losing weight it will be very apparent - very soon! Let him hang himself.

BeeElMarvin

Sorry for insulting your brother but ...

Men = peacocks. They can't live without the adoration of others.

Fact of life. You just have to accept it. #ManBashing

Generalize...much?