Just don't want to go through the effort anymore

FlaxMilk

Also, great advice I got from a friend here when I was in a "Don't give a darn" phase: What are all the things you did do right today? All of a sudden, it doesn't seem so overwhelming to just do a little better.

AlotOfSweatAndPain

This is horrible!! I joined MFP begining of August and have lost 6 pounds by now, I think that's actually ok weight loss, but somehow I feel totally deflated and discouraged and annoyed with this whole process. I know it took time to gain, so will take time to lose, but I can't convince my appetite of that.

I stopped loggig in about two weeks ago, and even though I started logging in two days ago, I haven't finished my diary each day or I have gone over goal. I haven't exercised at all in three weeks, and no matter how much I LOATH my body, I just can't find any excitment or committement to get going again...

Any ideas or support out there?? I hate setting goals that I never reach, so I don't even have the energy to look at the calandar and dream of a skinny Christmas or bikini's next summer

I'm not even going to join your pity party. You simply don't want it bad enough. Either you want to do this or you dont. I hope you find that AHA moment or that spark soon because looking for others to push you will only get you but so far. YOU need to push yourself above all else. Good luck.

hopsywopsy

Firstly, well done on your weight loss so far! Keep remembering you are already 6lbs lighter than when you started - that is almost the weight of an average sized baby.

Motivation can be so hard to find, not to mention the time and energy when you have (4) children. I only have 1 and some days I just feel relieved to have survived! As a mum it can also feel focusing on our own needs for a change (or maybe that's just me!).

Have you written a list of things that motivated you when you first started?

You say you hate this, and are finding it hard. It will take some effort, but I wonder if you could find ways of making it more enjoyable? To make this work for me, I have had to find ways of ensuring I don't feel hungry, DO still love my meals (if anything, I enjoy them more now), don't have to spend a lot of extra time on it (i.e. the family still all have the same meals), and found exercise I both enjoy and can fit around an unpredictable schedule. Oh, and I am almost never under goal (1,220 cals) but have given myself a "calorie banding" so anything up to about 1,600 is OK.

Now I am motivated by mini-goals (for me 7lb increments, which in the UK has a significance as we work in "stones" = 14lbs), by seeing the scales moving and my measurements decreasing and my clothes getting baggier.

I have no idea if this is helpful, but thought I'd share a bit about what I am doing. Feel free to add me as a friend. Good luck!

lisam191

I know exactly how you feel. I have lost 11lbs in 2 months, and last week for the first time ever, i actually GAINED weight. This week, i've been eating so badly, i've had 2 takeaways aswell. I have been drinking no water and done absolutely no exercise. I feel disgusting. I know i need to turn it around, but it's so difficult. I was doing so well with my weight loss and it's really annoyed me that i gained weight. I dread to even look at the scales this week, i cant stop eating.

sweetbippy

Here are a couple suggestions that help me. I will sleep in my workout clothes so I'm ready first thing in the morning. Work out first thing, before the day gets in the way. Do 5 minutes. If that's all you squeeze in, it's a start. Many times, I'll do the 5 and want to continue. Make it less painful. If you're running on a treadmill or elliptical, watch a new movie you've been wanting to see. Only watch it while working out, or listen to a book on tape, only while working out. I've run many an extra mile to hear the end of the chapter. As to eating better, go to the store and pick some things you've always wanted to try, or already prepared so there are no hassles or excuses. There are a lot of really tasty options in the health freezer section that will work calorie wise. It takes the pressure off, gets a week of premade meals, is quick and convenient. No, you probably won't always be able to do this, but it will get you started. Make a list of all the reasons you want to lose. Great vaca pics, health, kids, sexy clothes, high school reunion, whatever works for you. Put it on the fridge next to a fat and a skinny picture of yourself. Stay connected. There are going to be highs and lows. Good days and bad. Friends make it so much easier. You're not alone in this. I haven't lost a pound in months, but I am stronger, I can run longer and faster, my legs are more toned, my arms wiggle less, there's muscle definition... the scale is only one indicator of your progress. Good luck!

Starbuck2020

I just posted the same thing pretty much. I feel your pain. I really do.

Starbuck2020

This is horrible!! I joined MFP begining of August and have lost 6 pounds by now, I think that's actually ok weight loss, but somehow I feel totally deflated and discouraged and annoyed with this whole process. I know it took time to gain, so will take time to lose, but I can't convince my appetite of that.

I stopped loggig in about two weeks ago, and even though I started logging in two days ago, I haven't finished my diary each day or I have gone over goal. I haven't exercised at all in three weeks, and no matter how much I LOATH my body, I just can't find any excitment or committement to get going again...

Any ideas or support out there?? I hate setting goals that I never reach, so I don't even have the energy to look at the calandar and dream of a skinny Christmas or bikini's next summer

I'm not even going to join your pity party. You simply don't want it bad enough. Either you want to do this or you dont. I hope you find that AHA moment or that spark soon because looking for others to push you will only get you but so far. YOU need to push yourself above all else. Good luck.

There are people that kill themselves because they can't manage to lose. You think they didn't want it badly enough? Kind of a jerk thing to say. Everyone is different.

doodles80

So don't go through the effort and put weight back on.

I know how you feel - believe me. I lost 3 stones last year and put it all back on when I found out I had a heart defect and can't exercise til its operated on. Last year I just had to power though even though I did not feel like it and honestly - it did get better with time and I learned to like exercise (I wouldn't say I loved it!)

I think you need to give it some more time.

LorinaLynn

This is horrible!! I joined MFP begining of August and have lost 6 pounds by now, I think that's actually ok weight loss, but somehow I feel totally deflated and discouraged and annoyed with this whole process. I know it took time to gain, so will take time to lose, but I can't convince my appetite of that.

I stopped loggig in about two weeks ago, and even though I started logging in two days ago, I haven't finished my diary each day or I have gone over goal. I haven't exercised at all in three weeks, and no matter how much I LOATH my body, I just can't find any excitment or committement to get going again...

Any ideas or support out there?? I hate setting goals that I never reach, so I don't even have the energy to look at the calandar and dream of a skinny Christmas or bikini's next summer

Well, let's break it all down logically. You're goal is to lose a total of 50 pounds. You've already lost more than 10% of that in about a month. If you continue to lose 6 pounds a month, you'd reach your goal in less than 8 months. Where do you want to be in May? At your goal weight, or in the same place you are now?

As it sits now, you have 44 pounds to lose. That's not THAT much. Make sure your activity level is accurate (I really don't believe people are as "sedentary" as they think they are), set your goal to lose one pound a week, and eat back most of your exercise calories. Alternately, check with one of the groups like "In Place of a Road Map" ( http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/8017-in-place-of-a-road-map ) and find out your TDEE (total daily energy expenditure) and eat 20% less than that. You shouldn't feel deprived, hungry or miserable. If you are, something's wrong... either your calorie goal is too low, or you're not getting the right nutrients.

Set some goals that have nothing to do with the scale, but will improve your overall health and fitness. For me, when I started here, I wanted to be able to run a 5k. So I started the Couch to 5k running plan, and after a few weeks, I was able to run one mile. I'd NEVER been able to run a mile before! So even when my clothes still fit the same and I wasn't seeing major drops on the scale, I knew I was doing good things for my body. That kept me excited.

slkehl

I became motivated to exercise when I found it improved my mental health. I didn't want to put in the effort for weight loss, but feeling sane was worth a run!

deannajf4

Thank you all so very much! I am blown away that you all took the time to make a comment, and give me a little boost.

I really appreciate a number of your comments, and have been chewing on a few of the things you mentioned throughout the day (even, surprisingly the rather "negative" comments from the two extremly in-shape men...lol)

So, I went for a run tonight and will go to my class in the morning. I will keep logging calories and drinking water.

I heard today from people that the motivation comes from me, not from what anyone else can say, and I do agree with that, but I want you to know that sometimes it takes the perspective of another person to get that motivation high in myself. For example, one lady wrote that i could likely hit my goal by next May and would I rather be at my goal weight when May comes around (which it will)... or would I like to be at my same weight... I never really thought about it like that, and so her comment helped me. As I was getting so fixated on how slowly the weight is coming off...anyway, just want to say thanks and that this is a good board for people to come to when they need a little boost...

crunchybubblez

I know how you feel....

hesn92

You have to want it. I'm surprised how long I've stuck with this. I only wanted to lose 20 pounds (started in January) and I met my goal in I think April... and I've stuck with it since then. I've maintained, kept working out, trying to work more on building muscle, etc etc. I love how dedicated I am. I'm dedicated because I WANT it. I want to be fit. i want to look good. I want to be healthy.

alpine1994

The first month or two are the hardest because you're trying to break old habits and create new ones. You just really have to want it. Find a picture of you before you lost any weight that you hate and tell yourself you will never go back to that. Set short term goals for yourself, like I'm going to work out 6 days this week, or I'm going to eat 6 small meals today. Some people have a lot of success pre-logging their food for the next day so they stick to it. Just try out different things and see what motivates you the most.

I've been at it for about 5 months now, and it really does get easier. I'm at the point where I can't imagine that I used to eat really bad things ALL the time. I still have them once in a while, but it makes me feel gross after. Also, I feel really cranky and tired if I don't work out. You'll adjust.

I know the feeling, and please don't give up! Feel free to add me if you need some daily encouragement!

mrrodriguez

. . . Christmas, summer, your birthday, whatever arbitrary date you want to throw out, will come and go whether you do this or not. You can either be fitter, healthier and happier when it gets here, or not. Your choice

I totally love this statement. It really makes me think about the fact that time will pass anyway, might as well TRY to be fit. I am going through some of the same thing. Stuck in a plateau for a year. Add me as a friend if you like and we can commiserate.

ctgirlscout

I was in your situation once. I have four children, three of them close in age. My first child was (and still is) disabled. Because he was such a difficult baby, I was never able to lose my pregnancy weight due to depression and stress, and the pounds just kept coming with each subsequent child. My son just turned 26 on Tuesday, so that is how long I have been struggling with my weight. The bottom line is you have to find your motivation to lose weight and change your lifestyle. It could be that you are just not ready yet. But I want to tell you that it will be much easier to lose while you are young, rather than when you get to be my age (52). You have four beautiful children to get healthy for. I wish I had had the willpower years ago to do this for my kids. Try to build a support group for yourself and see if you can make this work, if not for you, then for your kids.