Communication: What is acceptable?

devil_in_a_blue_dress

We work from home and are best friends. So a lot.

3foldchord

maybe once a day IF he is somwhere reachable.... or if I have my phone turned on... Usually to find out when he will get home so I can have dinner somewhat ready. (he always seems to have last minute meetings or is in a different office, and he can't have his cell phone t work, so only if the operator there can get him an outside line) and he has frequent business trips that are often in different time zones- which can make calling hard- so we email then.


so some days none at all. My husband is more set on trying to call me once a day, than I am. He's the romantic in the family.

georgie_lou

I talk to my mum more than the biff. I call her 3-6 times a day. Sometimes more! I'll txt the biff every now and again but we live together and it's nice to have something to talk about at night lol

bulbadoof

My boyfriend talks to me almost nonstop at his job. He's a greeter at an office rental space, so his job is basically to sit around on a computer until someone shows up or needs help finding something.

Me, I don't have a cellphone, so when I manage to find a job around here, I probably won't talk to him at all on my shifts.

MinMin97

The submitter asks:
What is an acceptable amount of communication during the business day from your spouse or significant other?
What is too much is there a set amount that is too much or too little?

Communication would include phones calls, emails, text messages, instant messages.

Do you have contact with your spouse or significant other?
What would be considered excessive?

I contact my husband at work.
He's an orthopedic nurse.
It is a privilege, as I view it.
I don't call him directly, so I am not sneaking around authority.
I would not want to interrupt those he is serving, and what he is being paid to do....
as I would not want that done to me, if I were in their place.
I do need to contact him sometimes, though.
I feel in a sense that they hired my husband, but I work for them, too, as I work to make husband prepared and successful.
Also, I want to be sensitive to whether or not this is disruptive to him.....
I call for a reason, but not to hash anything out. (Ooohhhh, that would be bad, plus....not private??)

amanda_ataraxia

My husband is serving a year in Korea so we talk through FB chat and on Skype all the time.

3foldchord

.
I call for a reason, but not to hash anything out. (Ooohhhh, that would be bad, plus....not private??)

LOL- TRUE! All my husbands phone calls are taped/listened to- or maybe just sporadic ones. not sure, but it surely limits what I say to him. Thugh I tease hm that I will call him one day andd talk super dirty to see if the people listening in say anything about it. (but I never do)

MinMin97

When you get a text/email/IM from them and you go "JFC. WHY IS SHE/HE TEXTING/CALLING/IMing/EMAILING ME AGAIN!?!?"


Maybe it's too much.

Yes I think this is what the submitter is experiencing. So much so that they really have nothing to discuss about their day when they get home.

Maybe the communications are unproductive?
Keep them relevant to something you are working on together.
Sounds like you need to have some goal setting times.
Husband and I do this regularly, so we are both pulling in the same direction.
Working together is really fun and exciting.
So much can be accomplished! And a whole lot more flow energy, and intimacy, too.

LadyIvysMom

Unless something was going on (like the other day when my husband took the pets to the vet while I was at work & texted me with updates) we text each other maybe 3 times during the day. Like one text every few hours.

magj0y

My husband works from home, but in all honesty we rarely eat lunch together. we talk msg each other about important stuff and that's it.

Why? Because he's at work and he's supposed to be working. Calling/texting/e-mailing your spouse while he's at work about stuff that doesn't need to be immediately addressed is distracting and interrupts work most of the time and you don't know if they are in the middle of a conversation with the boss. msg him while they're on break/lunch and that should be it.

Im_NotPerfect

My husband and I used to work together, and in fact constant communication (e-mail) is how we flirted and hooked up! LOL So now that we don't work together anymore, we e-mail throughout the day. Sometimes we get into a full conversation where it's constant, sometimes it's only 2 or 3 messages. Just depends on the day.

CarleyLovesPets

My ex and I would email most of the day.
At least 2 emails an hour unless one of us was really busy.

Though he didn't mind nor did I.
He would actually email me again being like "Hey you busy/okay?" if he didn't hear from me in two hours or so.

We'd also text if I wasn't at home.

It wasn't controlling or anything like that, it wasn't like that.
Just simply talking too each other about our day and what we were up too.

magj0y

My ex and I would email most of the day.
At least 2 emails an hour unless one of us was really busy.

Though he didn't mind nor did I.
He would actually email me again being like "Hey you busy/okay?" if he didn't hear from me in two hours or so.

We'd also text if I wasn't at home.

It wasn't controlling or anything like that, it wasn't like that.
Just simply talking too each other about our day and what we were up too.

I hope your IT dept doesn't scan for employees that do this!

ChelseaYepThatsMe

I go to my boyfriends house EVERY DAY! I text him when I wake up. He texts me while he's at work 5pm-5am. Sometimes calls me when he's got a break. I text him every wednesday when I get to school.

unJunk

If you asked this question 20 years ago the answer would be entirely different.

Depends primarily on the job as far as I am concerned. Also, your relationship should be at a point that it isn't measured at all by the frequency of communication when you are busy with other stuff.

This is completely true before cell phones were common place. OR even if oyu had a cell phone and your minutes were severely limited to use only via emergency.

People woudl leave in the morning, maybe call for 10 min at lunch, and not talk again until home in the evening

mrs_deg1983

Amy way we can. We have two young daughters, and the oldest is four snd never stops talking. My husband text each other and some times from the same room lol. We talk a4 much as we can one way our another.

carriempls

My bf and I both have office jobs. We don’t call or text each other at work (unless something urgent comes up) but we email at least once a day, sometimes several times a day. That way we can respond when we’ve got time.

We don’t live together yet. He’s in class 2 nights a week and plays pool another night. We usually only see each other in person on weekends and maybe 1 weeknight. There will usually be a phone call on weeknights we don’t see each other.

We’re moving in together in November. I don’t know if that will change how often we email or not.

S1NN3R

I mostly email with my husband, every now and then he will text. And either he will call me when he is on his way back to work from his lunch or I will call him on my way out to lunch.