Building Self Confidence

LFreshley

Hello everyone. My name is Liz. I'm 24 and getting married in April 2013. On Thursday, I am going wedding dress shopping for the first time, but I am fearful that I won't be able to commit to a dress. I've always had self esteem issues even before my weight became an issue. How do you build self confidence in yourself? How do you keep yourself motivated? I want to keep going and lose the weight so I can be healthier and happier, but sometimes it just gets really hard.

bizorra

For me, it helps when I put a bit more effort in to my appearance. I feel so different on days when I actually do my hair vs wear a ponytail, or dress properly vs wearing yoga pants. My natural state is pretty slobby *lol* so little things give me a boost and make me feel good about myself.

I'd advise that you go all out for dress shopping! Do your hair and make-up, wear jewellery and your best bra. Bring people who will be honest with you about how great you look, and don't feel that you have to pick a dress that day - get the salespeople to write down style numbers etc. You can always go back for round 2.
Oh and if you go to a store and the saleslady makes any rude comment about your dress size, walk out. Unless you live in a tiny town with only one bridal shop, don't put up with it. I had a great dress shopping experience but I've heard horror stories from other women.

Devild0ll

I'm sorry, honey, but it's a lot of hard work. What is it that's keeping you from believing in yourself? What are the things that you *know* to be great about you? Don't try to convince yourself that you're something you really believe you aren't. We know when we're lying to ourselves, and it has the opposite effect... we feel worse about ourselves rather than better. If there are people who are dragging you down with insults, give 'em the boot! No one needs that crap!

I was always incredibly down on myself. I still am somewhat, but I've gotten tons better. My thing i always knew about myself was that I'm smart. My wasband (abusive, mean, evil man) took everything from me: my friends, my confidence around people, my ability to laugh at life. When he started in on my intelligence, I just laughed at him! He couldn't take that from me because I knew he was wrong.

After I left him, I built myself back up with that as a base. I clung to my intelligence like a life raft as I found other things I was good at. Caring for my friends, raising my son, cooking, crafting, all kinds of things! Find your core, solidify it, and build out.

And therapy. A good therapist is priceless.

Good luck!