Question for people who have lost weight who were overweight

JennytheWicked

Do you think that having been overweight makes you less likely to judge an overweight person? Instead of the resorting to the usual negative comments most overweight people have been exposed to, would you be more likely to consider the person’s reasons for being overweight as opposed to immediately assuming they’re lazy or name calling?

I wonder if, while detrimental to one’s health, being overweight can be beneficial in the sense that it exposes people to that negative judgment so that, in turn that same person refrains from judging others based because of their own experiences. Maybe experience breeds empathy.

Just curious.

EmilyOfTheSun

Hmmmm. IDK. I think it goes both ways for me. If I see someone who is overweight but who is also clearly trying hard to change that, I definitely don't judge them! When I see overweight people who constantly complain about it, and do nothing to change it, it really gets on my nerves and I'm probably calling them "fatty" in my mind. lol

taylor5877

nah, if anything I'm more judgemental because I did it...(JK)

carriempls

I don’t think it makes much of a difference. There will be those will empathize more because they’ve been through it and there will be those who will be more judgmental because they’ve changed so everybody can.

possibri

I try my best not to judge people one way or another... can't say that being overweight all of my life (so far) really made me feel that way, but it wouldn't surprise me if that was partly why I think it's so important not to judge others based solely on looks.

OnWisconsin84

When I see overweight people who constantly complain about it, and do nothing to change it, it really gets on my nerves and I'm probably calling them "fatty" in my mind. lol

This. But I'd use stronger, more colorful language.

dadzpeach

Hmmmm. IDK. I think it goes both ways for me. If I see someone who is overweight but who is also clearly trying hard to change that, I definitely don't judge them! When I see overweight people who constantly complain about it, and do nothing to change it, it really gets on my nerves and I'm probably calling them "fatty" in my mind. lol

^^^THIS!

I don't judge people either way, but it does bother me if they complain and then not try to change

ILoveTheBrowns

nah, if anything I'm more judgemental because I did it...(JK)

agreed

DoingitWell

It has caused me to have more empathy because I know how hard it is to lose weight.

ILoveTheBrowns

nah, if anything I'm more judgemental because I did it...(JK)

agreed

whoops nevermind you said jk....im not judgemental but i hate hearing the excuses i think because i was the one who used all of them before and now ive done it so it can be done

douglasmobbs

Of course you judge them. What you say to them or how you act will depend on the person and yourself.

delilah47

When you see an overweight person, why would you even wonder how they got that way? It's none of your business. And, no, it's not beneficial to be overweight so people like you can come to a negative judgement on how they got that way. It's bad enough being treated like crap when you are overweight.

suzieqcookie

the first time i lost all the weight i was extremely judgmental towards fat people. I was in my 20's and lost it pretty easy. THEN i gained it all back due to a health issue and all the lovely meds i took getting that under control. Honestly, even then, i thought it was punishment from God for being to mean to fat people.

chivalryder

Unless there is a medical reason for them to be obese, which there rarely is, then there is no reason why I should treat them with more courtesy or respect than I do any ordinary person.

TrailRunner61

As a person who has gone from anorexic/bulimia to obese and back to a healthy weight...I don't judge anyone by their size. In fact, I believe that I am MORE compassionate towards them. Last week I saw a very obese woman trying to get out of her car and I stopped and asked her if she needed help. She was embarrassed but happy I was willing to help her. When I was super skinny, younger and dumber I probably wouldn't have done that, thinking that she needs the exercise and could work on getting out herself.If anything, I feel sorry for them and wish they would have their 'ahah' moment like I did, because until then, they wont do anything a bout it. Shame on me. Anyway, people are obese (and too thin) for many reasons. It could be sexual abuse, emotional abuse, depression, medical conditions, caused by medications, who knows? But, I am a human being and so are 'they'. I will help anyone, regardless of where they are in their journey (on their way or not) to better health and being slimmer.

RobinvdM

If I see an overweight person at the grocery store stocking up on frozen pizza, soda, and chips I probably will quietly judge them in my own mind. That's just reality. I will, naturally, feel just as judged when I am shopping for a birthday party and my cart is stocked with ice cream, cake mixes, frosting, and all that party food stuffs. If we aren't at the grocery store I do my best not to judge, and when at the gym I actually try smiling a LOT at the people who are overweight and clearly trying their best to work on it. I'm turning into one of those people that want to hug everyone who tries their best, which is totally contrary to my personality. So ya, Id judge in a store with someone having a grocery cart full of crap.

smkey

I have a completely different view on overweight people, especially when I see them at the gym. Before I'd lost my weight, I'd think more negatively about larger people (like me) who were at the gym. Now I find myself inwardly and sometimes outwardly encouraging them. I know it can be done. Success is just a few more workouts away.

JennytheWicked

I have a completely different view on overweight people, especially when I see them at the gym. Before I'd lost my weight, I'd think more negatively about larger people (like me) who were at the gym. Now I find myself inwardly and sometimes outwardly encouraging them. I know it can be done. Success is just a few more workouts away.

I love this outlook.

babymine55

Hmm, it surprises me that "fatty" is a term used...for me, it doesn't matter what stage a person is in, my heart bleeds for those that are overweight and merely surviving, rather than living.

We don't always know the details of what someone is walking through. Death of a loved one, sexual abuse (this was me), eating disorder (this was me too). While eating the two drive through meals at McD's...all the while hating myself, I know there were those calling me "fatty", sometimes out loud...sometimes in their head. Did any one of those people stop to care that I was wounded on the inside?

I can say now, I don't give a damn about those haters or judgemental people...I learned a lot from my journey to a LONG TERM healthier life-NEVER, NEVER, NEVER judge a book by its cover, no matter what they happen to be doing. When I see an overweight person, regardless of what they are doing, whether they are finally ready to begin healing, or if they are still broken and hurting, I chose to love them and show encouragement where ever they might be.

JennytheWicked

Hmm, it surprises me that "fatty" is a term used...for me, it doesn't matter what stage a person is in, my heart bleeds for those that are overweight and merely surviving, rather than living.

We don't always know the details of what someone is walking through. Death of a loved one, sexual abuse (this was me), eating disorder (this was me too). While eating the two drive through meals at McD's...all the while hating myself, I know there were those calling me "fatty", sometimes out loud...sometimes in their head. Did any one of those people stop to care that I was wounded on the inside?

I can say now, I don't give a damn about those haters or judgemental people...I learned a lot from my journey to a LONG TERM healthier life-NEVER, NEVER, NEVER judge a book by its cover, no matter what they happen to be doing. When I see an overweight person, regardless of what they are doing, whether they are finally ready to begin healing, or if they are still broken and hurting, I chose to love them and show encouragement where ever they might be.

I agree.

EmilyOfTheSun

Hmm, it surprises me that "fatty" is a term used...for me, it doesn't matter what stage a person is in, my heart bleeds for those that are overweight and merely surviving, rather than living.

I'm not saying all overweight people. People that complain about it yet do nothing to change it. It's not like I'd say it out loud or be mean to them. This is just the thought that pops in my mind lol. I can't stand when people complain about stuff that is in their control.

kanittaj

I try not to judge anyone because I am not the judge. What I do like to do is offer positive reinforcement for anyone that may be struggling. I still have a long way to go, but I encourage my family and friends to take the proper measures for a healthier life. We need less judgment and more helping each other...

babymine55

Hmm, it surprises me that "fatty" is a term used...for me, it doesn't matter what stage a person is in, my heart bleeds for those that are overweight and merely surviving, rather than living.

I'm not saying all overweight people. People that complain about it yet do nothing to change it. It's not like I'd say it out loud or be mean to them. This is just the thought that pops in my mind lol. I can't stand when people complain about stuff that is in their control.

I hear you...however, I was one of those people. I'd complain..all the while eating an entire large pizza to myself. It's a process, like any other. But, I was broken. I hated my body, I hated living. I was trapped in 370 pounds...I was in a live coffin of fat. But, I wouldn't chang my journey for anything. It brought me to where I am today. Today, I LIVE. Today, I get to show my children what healthy eating and EXERCISING looks like.

That's why I would never judge or even think "fatty" to someone who just isn't there yet. If I can be an encourager for them, awesome! If they are ready for accountability, fantastic! If they just need non-judgemental eyes to say, hello....I'm there.

kimothy38

Sometimes I can be really compassionate and empathise with overweight people and other times I'm really judgemental. I definitely believe you have to hit your lowest point in order to gain the determination to do something about being overweight and it's really sad when people ask for help but don't follow through with it. I'm still overweight but am soooooo much happier and healthier and I want others to experience that also.

Off10h8ed

I am an extremely open person. I have never, nor will I ever judge someone because of their weight, looks, religion, race, sexual preference, or anything of the sort. I don't think it has anything to do with me being over weight. I think for me it is more of a personal human nature thing. Even when I was a thin 118lbs, I was never judgmental over weight. I mean, I am not a perfect person, if I get irritated at someones actions or something, I can be very judgmental. Just not so much over the basic things in life. You really don't know other peoples stories and why they are where they are at. Yes, I talk to my son and my mother, both whom are over weight, about exercising and such. I don't hound them about it but I do want them to know that I care about them and that them being over weight is a health concern but as I said, you can't know exactally what is going on with others all the time. I just know that I feel better physically since I started working out more regularly and I want to share that with them.

nicholettebell

I am definitely less sympathetic especially to those who complain but don't do anything about it. Although I can identify and empathize with their struggle. But I can't lose the weight for them.