Hi everyone - looking for motivation buddies!!!

kateyb

Hi Guys, hope everyone's well and had a great New Year.

I, like so many, have decided now is the time to really get serious and set myself some weight loss goals. I've struggled with my weight since my early 20's (I'm 29 now) after having been an active/slim teenager. In the past 9 years my weight has yo yo'd as fad diets were tried and discarded, brazillian diet pills taken and found to be the most amazing things ever - then declared illegal, and exercise regimes discarded after a couple of weeks.

I always have a very strong start, and can keep myself going for a few weeks, but without someone to share it with and be encouraged by I lose interest . I know I should be encouraged by the successes as the weight drops off, but I'm not. It's odd, almost like I need other peoples approval more than I value my own. In the past I've actually wondered if I am subconciously sabotaging my efforts and am too comfortable with the invisibility shield this layer of fat gives me. Once thats gone I'm out of excuses!

Whatever the reason I have decided that enough is enough. I have put in 5 stone (and gone up 6 dress sizes) in the past 2 years through a combination of poor eating habits and a complete change of lifestyle (moving back to the UK from Miami - land of the body concious), and it has to go.

To be honest, if it wasn't for that fact that I'm having to buy bigger clothes sizes I probably wouldn't have even noticed, I know that sounds preposterous but when I look in the mirror I don't see it, I see myself as the same size I always have. Even when at my skinniest (size 6/8) I didn't look in the mirror and see myself as slim - I saw what I've always seen, and continue to see now.

That said I'm not happy with the way I am now and am determined to do something about that.

I've read enough and heard enough to know that my biggest problem is my relationship with food. I don't really like chocolate so barely eat sweets, and I don't eat excessive amounts, but I do reward and console myself with my favourite foods. Everytime I feel like I've achieved something or worked really hard I treat myself to a chinese or other takeaway. If I'm upset or stressed I think that a chinese and takeaway will cheer me up. If I stay in on a weekend night (which I hate - being stuck in the house on my own when everyone else it out enjoying themselves) then I'll justify that I've saved lots of money by not going out so deserve a little treat to make my plight more bearable. It's not like I'm constantly eating take outs - but I'm obviously over indulging when I do and doing this far too often to be healthy.

I know I can't blame anyone but myself about this, but it also doesn't help that I have a skinny flatmate who has the exact same eating habits as me yet manages to remain a perfect size 10 (without exercising). We're bad influences on each other because even when I haven't had a bad day, she has and so wants the comfort and pick me up of yummy food and a movie. During the day I'm very careful about what I eat, and I'd say 4/5 days out of 7 we cook a healthy dinner, but not healthy enough to level out the excessive calories consumed on the other 2/3 days. So..... it may seem a little drastic but I think a real change is needed....

In less than a month I am moving out, moving back to my parents for a while which will serve the dual purpose of helping me save money for a deposit on a house and also help me break my bad eating habits. My parents are really quite health concious and have always viewed my weight fluctuations with disdain. I'm hoping that this will be a big enough motivator to keep me on the right path. I want to drop 3 stone by the summer and am aiming to get back to (and maintain) a size 12 figure. I have calculated that with a loss of 2lb's per week I should reach my goal by May 23rd (I started on Monday!).

This site is a god send with the calorie counting and targets broken down into such easy terms but now I'm looking for weight loss buddies to help me stay on track, and of course I'll provide the same motivation in return.

I know it's less likely but also if theres anyone local I'd love an exercise buddy, even if just once a week. I'm open to most activity, I can't run to save my life but am willing to try!

Anyone interested?

psamora

Hello there wow what a story, but no different than mine if I bother writing about it. First thing if you could find someone to work out with that would be a plus. I have a friend that we go 5 day a week in the morning at 3:30 am and work out. We made a commitment to stick with it. She has a lot more weight to lose so I always stay on her. Don't get me wrong there are mornings that we say I just want to sleep. The work out that we have found really works for us is we do weight 3 days and cardio 2 days. We also walk for lunch. I don’t know how you feel about protein drinks but they can really help with weigh lost. I have found that one in the morning and for days that I’m in a hurry I have one for lunch with fruit and a banana it’s like the best smoothie you will ever have.
It is very difficult to stay motivated when you are doing this on your own but like the old saying goes you are your worst enemy sometimes. I think that you have the basics to meet your goal. What I have also found that if can eat good carbs and try and take in about 35 grams of fiber that helps you to stay fool and your body burns 250 calories processing that fiber.
I think that fact that you have made a choice to change and have put yourself out there and asked for help is a plus. Try and not treat yourself with food I am also guilty of that instead go and use the money that you were going to use for a meal to buy some lotion or a candle or save it and them go back to it in a month and go have fun it doesn’t have to be around food all the time.
Have a great day, by the way I think it’s great that you can look at yourself in the mirror and not see the weight I on the other hand is all I see. I only have 10 or 15 people tell me that’s too much but I will be judge of that because when I look in the mirror all I see is fat.

kateyb

Wow 3.30 in the morning?! Thats hardcore!!! Good for you, unfortunately I don't think I could cope.

I work 12 hour days 5 days a week so finding the time to exercise is a problem. In the states I used to do the slim in 6 DVDs and loved them. I've been trying to get hold of that or something similar in the UK but so far no joy! I'm not a big fan of the gym so want to concentrate on exercise I enjoy more, and am thinking I'm going to try and get to a Yoga and Zumba class once a week.

With the diet I'm trying to limit myself to around 1000 calories a day so that I do have the freedom to go over that a little when I'm out with friends.

Just to address the 'all you see is fat' - please don't take this the wrong way, but I have a few friends who feel the same way and the commonality between them all is low self esteem. Obviously you're doing the right things and making a massive effort to correct what you don't like about yourself, but are doing anything about your own self image? I think I am lucky in the fact that I am a size 18 and don't look in the mirror and get disgusted with whats looking back, but maybe it's because I see past my appearance and instead recognise the person behind it all, maybe because I've been skinny and decided that it wasn't all it was cracked up to be - 2 years ago I was wearing size 6 jeans - but I wasn't happy at that weight. I was just as insecure then as I was when I started out to lose the weight and realised that after all that work I still didn't look like the image I had in my mind, maybe the image was wrong, not the way I had looked in the first place.

Why not make a list of all the things you like about yourself and read it every morning. Ask your friends to write a few little notes explaining what aspects of your personality they particularly love and read one each time you feel down. Little things like that might prove to overtake the fat image you see when you look in the mirror.

Thanks for the support and good luck with your own mission!

x
x
x

lorro

Hi Katey,

I lost 20 pounds relatively easily (for me) last year and managed to keep most of it off. Still a long way to go so I am back for more. I found this book very helpful: (http://www.amazon.co.uk/Overcoming-Weight-Problems-Jeremy-Gauntlett-Gilbert/dp/1845290682) to build motivation and identify the negative thinking patterns that get you when you're down. Getting to know people here who are doing the same thing and can provide support helps enormously too, as does the discipline of logging the food etc. I also found it really helpful to set up a private blog to reflect on how things are going, record progress against targets etc. The more you invest in it, the more likely you are to succeed. Good luck