Halloween quips

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lkcuts
lkcuts Posts: 224
in Chit-Chat
Some one put a thread with jokes for he day loved it so thought I would send one and hopefully people have a few jokes to add to it about Halloween. Here goes...

A little boy painted his face red and filled his mouth with mayo as his costume. He went to the first door for candy with his friends. A man answered the door exclaiming. "why here's a spider man, a princess and a witch and the guy looks a the little boy and asks "What are you supposed to be?" He takes his hands pops his cheeks and says,... "A pimple".

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  • lkcuts
    lkcuts Posts: 224
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    knock knock
    who's there?
    "BOO"
    "BOO WHO?"
    Well ya don't have to cry about it
  • coliema
    coliema Posts: 7,646 Member
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    A little boy painted his face red and filled his mouth with mayo as his costume. He went to the first door for candy with his friends. A man answered the door exclaiming. "why here's a spider man, a princess and a witch and the guy looks a the little boy and asks "What are you supposed to be?" He takes his hands pops his cheeks and says,... "A pimple".

    Hahahah, I puked in my mouth a little bit.
  • lkcuts
    lkcuts Posts: 224
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    A little boy painted his face red and filled his mouth with mayo as his costume. He went to the first door for candy with his friends. A man answered the door exclaiming. "why here's a spider man, a princess and a witch and the guy looks a the little boy and asks "What are you supposed to be?" He takes his hands pops his cheeks and says,... "A pimple".

    Hahahah, I puked in my mouth a little bit.

    Ya its kinda like EWWWW ha hah hahha
  • Rachlmale
    Rachlmale Posts: 640 Member
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    Why was the skeleton afraid to cross the road?
    It had no guts...

    :bigsmile:
  • tcunbeliever
    tcunbeliever Posts: 8,219 Member
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    Some one put a thread with jokes for he day loved it so thought I would send one and hopefully people have a few jokes to add to it about Halloween. Here goes...

    A little boy painted his face red and filled his mouth with mayo as his costume. He went to the first door for candy with his friends. A man answered the door exclaiming. "why here's a spider man, a princess and a witch and the guy looks a the little boy and asks "What are you supposed to be?" He takes his hands pops his cheeks and says,... "A pimple".

    Ok Blutarsky!
  • ErB56
    ErB56 Posts: 71 Member
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    A couple received a last minute invitation to a Halloween costume party and had to scramble for outfits. Every great idea that the wife came up with was vetoed by the husband, typically accompanied by 'dumb', 'lame', etc. Finally, the wife got fed up and left the room. When she came back, she threw an orange jumpsuit and a 2 x 4 on the bed. Husband says "What is that?" Wife says "Put on the jumpsuit, shove the 2 x 4 up your *kitten* and go as a Dreamcycle!"
  • lkcuts
    lkcuts Posts: 224
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    lovin' it keep em' coming!!
  • Rachlmale
    Rachlmale Posts: 640 Member
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    A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween Party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need of his good time being spoiled by not going. So he took his costume and away he went.

    The wife, after sleeping soundly for one hour, awakened without pain, and as it was still early, she decided to go to the party. In as much as her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him.


    She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice chick he could, and copping a little feel here and a little kiss there. His wife sidled up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his partner high and dry and devoted his time to the new stuff that had just arrived.


    She let him go as far as he wished; naturally, since he was her husband. Finally he whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and had a little bang.


    Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away and went home and put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make for his behavior.


    She was sitting up reading when he came in and asked what kind of a time he had. He said, "Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you're not there."


    Then she asked, "Did you dance much?"


    He replied, "I'll tell you, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Brown and some other guys, so we went into the den and played poker all evening. But I'll tell you... the guy I loaned my costume to sure had a real good time!"

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