If at first you don't succeed...

elebel82

Try try again, right?

Hi all, I'm 30 and live in Melbourne, Australia. Not completely new to MFP, I've used it as an app to check out calories for well over a year, but definitely new to this community. Fair warning, sometimes I write too much and can't work out what to delete, alas.

For most of my adult life I weighed 110-115kg. Then a few years ago, I finally moved out of my parents house, was struggling with money, and got down to about 100kg on the poverty diet alone. I remember the first time I went to a store and found that I fitted into a size 16, ie, clothes stocked in regular stores, was one of the happiest days ever. That was when I got serious and used a website similar to this one and got down to 84kg extremely quickly. I was happy. Then I stopped.

Don't get me wrong, I didn't go into gorge mode, I maintained around that weight for about a year.

But then my lifestyle changed again
- I started working a far less active job, loooong shifts, with lots of long breaks, and shift work to boot +5kg
- I moved to an apartment where everything I could want is extremely close, no more 3 flights of stairs like the old place, and got a car so that I can get to certain shifts that I was struggling with beforehand, use it way too often +5kg
- quit smoking + 5kg (but yay, right?)
- got way complacent + a few more kg

Most recently I put on 5kg in one month, that just won't shift. This 5kg I don't actually understand. I currently weigh 107kg and absolutely terrified of hitting the 110kg again. My family still think I've "maintained a lower weight" mostly I think because I dress differently these days, but those clothes aren't fitting me so well anymore, I'm scared of dating again like I used to be when I was younger, my work uniform that I ordered 20kg ago still kind of fits but just makes me self conscious.

I've been calorie counting again for a few months now, and mostly I've been good with it, but I guess I'm not accountable, because nothing's happening. If I have a bad day I stop logging, a few weeks ago a bad day turned into a bad week. I have a flatmate who eats blocks of chocolate for dinner and so is very forgiving if I slip up a little, tells me I'm doing a great job, tells me I deserve a break when clearly, the scales don't lie. I know she thinks she's helping, but I guess it's not really what I need. I need community with similar goals. I already knew this. About this time last year I was on a similar community - my body was being extremely stubborn to begin with back then as well, but becoming active in the community helped, got some new tips, jiggled things around, got the support I needed, and finally broke the 100kg mark... and then my circumstances changed again, you'd think I'd have learnt from the previous attempt, but I guess that's a lesson I have to keep learning until I get it. What I've taken away from that though is that I need to be accountable, and that community helps with that. So I guess this is me saying hi, and hoping to find similar support over here.

In numbers: height: 161cm, weight:107kg

my short term goal is 99kg, but I don't want to get too excited when I reach that, after that I'll want to get back down to the 84kg and then 77kg which would make me "overweight" and not "obese", and from there hopefully it'll be habit and I can reassess. I'm also challenging myself in the gym, and various tasks I want to be able to do within the next year or so.

What I don't want - having to write this same post in a year's time. I never used to be a yo-yoer, and I don't think it really suits my personality, I've yo -yoed twice now I guess, I don't want to do it again.

PNJB796

As you will know already, as your weight decreases, activity becomes easier and less strenuous. You have amply described your current status and have a defined idea of where you want to get to. With those objectives set and your own clear determination, I believe you will be ticketyy boo . Keep up the good work and Good Luck!