jealousy?

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  • Austintito
    Austintito Posts: 6 Member
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    I wouldn't just say its just a jealousy thing but it could be. Im talking from personal experience.. whenever I first got into lifting id talk about it non stop and usually your group of friends you had before this lifestyle change just don't care. People tend to take your excitement and enthusiasm for this change as a "im better than you mentality" even tho that's not the message your trying to portray. After a while I just learned to keep it to myself and over time you'll meet new people who are into the same things you are that WILL want to hear about that kind of stuff. Just trying to get you to think on it from a different aspect, as I said the "im better than you" probably isnt the message your sending out but some people will take it that way.. People is just way to sensitive about crap.

    However this is happening on facebook and honestly, facebook is full of random rants and loads of bs I really don't see why or how anyone could be that annoyed with hearing your updates on your lifestyle. With that said keep posting it and unfriend that person, obviously its not a friend!
  • JuliyaRN
    JuliyaRN Posts: 18
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    UNFRIEND! done.

    I deleted fb long time ago, and would never sign up again. But you encounter negativity based on everyone's own opinion in cyber world and in real life. best you can do is get rid of them. focus on what makes you happy. probably the person was insecure in themselves and seeing your success and determination must have reminded them of their own downfalls. not really your problem or worry.

    have a great day and stay positive, you've accomplished a great deal.
  • Loves418
    Loves418 Posts: 330 Member
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    Wow..unfriend her ..I will be your FB friend and even your MFP friend. I love positive I need it in my life...I deal with a lot of negative as well..I try to not let it bring me down.
  • SRH7
    SRH7 Posts: 2,037 Member
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    That's one of the reasons I love this site. Most of my "real" friends on Facebook just don't get how much fitness, and especially exercise, have become my passion, and a way of life. So unless I'm pushing a charity run or a major accomplishment, I share it here with my support peeps! Hold your ground and good for you for being positive!

    Agreed. I'm not FB friends with any of my MFP friends and vice versa. I have the two different social networks for different reasons and if I need motivation to move my backside or eat well I turn to my fitness friends rather than Facebook. But, as and when I hit goal weight you can bet I will be posting some photos of my success on FB! Anyone who gets narky with me will be deleted!
  • JuliyaRN
    JuliyaRN Posts: 18
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    Also, I hate when people make criteria for what's allowed to be posted on facebook or not. It's facebook, the sole purpose of it has no meaning. It's a soapbox, sometimes a way to stalk your ex's, but it's still useless and has no point. therefor NO ONE can be offended if you post random stuff on it that they don't like. I like your fishing pictures about as much as you like my baby and cat pictures.

    ( twitter is platform of choice. rant away!)
  • Italiano7
    Italiano7 Posts: 382 Member
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    DONT STOP POSTING. THAT SHOULD MOTIVATE YOU TO POST TWICE AS OFTEN.
  • Corruptkitten
    Corruptkitten Posts: 157 Member
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    Like my friend Nikki says "If you have haters you must be doing something right." Honestly I have the same issue. It has nothing to do with you, it is all her. Let her internalize it and feel bad about herself, heck maybe it will eventually motivate her. I do the same thing on my FB because my "real" friends support me and it keeps me accountable. I had such a hard time finally publicly coming out on FB talking about my workouts, my goals etc, due to fear of being judged (I know issues, right!?) If someone said something like that to me I would lose it.
  • ThisGirl2013
    ThisGirl2013 Posts: 220 Member
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    It is her own issue. Maybe she just feels bad because she isn't out there doing good stuff, too. She should just delete if she is so offended. I can't stand people like that. I mean, I do feel bad for them but come on! Why try to take it a step further and bash you on top of it?! I think adults don't follow the rule of - If ya can't say something nice, don't say anything at all!
  • meghan6867
    meghan6867 Posts: 388 Member
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    Post what motivates you and makes you happy. If she has a problem with it, tell her to unsubscribe from your posts or defriend you. You are posting information about your life: your interests and hobbies. You aren't preaching to anybody. If she isn't interested in it... tell her to get lost.

    Also: WTG on your weightloss so far! You're doing AMAZING!
  • KatieLou1022
    KatieLou1022 Posts: 102 Member
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    Better_zpsc26adad8.jpg
  • teamdj1
    teamdj1 Posts: 265 Member
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    Who needs FB when you have MFP and people are here for you on your journey. Sad that there is always someone out there to bring negativity to something so positive. Post your success on here and tell them ungrateful people to go fly a kite. O ya by the way Congrats. :flowerforyou:
  • lizp114
    lizp114 Posts: 202 Member
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    well I have a so called friend like that...I always post postive quotes, sayings, and good things going on in my life...I don't like t put negative stuff out there....it's enough negative and bs in the world...so anyway my so called friend inboxed me and said I was fake cause I'm always pretending I'm so happy and my life is so perfect...so i was like I have ups and downs just like everybody else but just because i don't glorify my problems doesn't mean i'm fake...people are a trip...just because they have issues with themselves they try to drag someone down with them
  • etoiles_argentees
    etoiles_argentees Posts: 2,827 Member
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    All my life, i ignore it. I'm lucky i was born as i am. I'm thankful I have a great body and good health. jealousy is not my thing.
  • metaphoria
    metaphoria Posts: 1,432 Member
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    It is so sad that people can't be happy for someone trying to make positive changes in their life. I go through the same thing with my in-laws.

    When I was going to cardio classes 3x a week and running on the weekends, I was told that I was being selfish and taking too much time away from my family. BUT my sister-in-law went and got gastric bypass surgery, lost 90 pounds, and is now told how awesome it is that she was able to loose the weight. While I'm happy for her...SHE CHEATED!!! I was working hard to count my calories, exercise regularly, and even incorporate my family whenever I could...my daughter would bike ride when I would run or she would go with me to my Zumba class and participate. How is it that taking the easy road is worthy of praise, but good old fashioned hard work is not?!

    I'm so sorry that your "friend" is not supporting you or seeing your posts as positive and uplifting. Maybe she is saying those things out of guilt that she can't/won't take the initiative to better herself? Either way, keep staying positive and strong. You are doing a great job and have no reason to be put down! :)

    Gastric bypass isn't cheating. This isn't Monopoly.
  • angel2rn
    angel2rn Posts: 11
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    Maybe she's feeling a little convicted & she's not liking it too well.......
  • CrowdStoppa
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    The better you look the more haters gonna hate girl so just keep up being proud of yourself and posting what makes YOU feel good and let them keep on hatin!!!
  • crenner07
    crenner07 Posts: 36
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    Do what you need to do in order to smile and keep it up. Nothing wrong with that. If people on my Facebook page post stuff I don't agree with, don't like or even feel is aimed at me but isn't helpful I will simply ignore it. That person is welcome to have their opinion but I refuse to let their opinion keep me down. I have enough self doubt that I don't need my "friends" to bring me down. Keep up the good work and ignore the jealous ones! :smile:
  • Sqeekyjojo
    Sqeekyjojo Posts: 704 Member
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    What everybody else said.

    With the exception of the criticisms of bypass surgery. I'd hardly call being so desperate that they have their entire digestive system permanently screwed by irreversible surgery and left with malnutrition that always has to be treated by supplementation AND a physical inability to stomach enough food in one go, but still with the same emotional issues and desires that everybody else here that's overweight struggles with but can lapse without pain or danger, as being 'cheating'.

    They certainly aren't cheating when they die under anaesthesia. Or end up switching to anorexia nervosa due to the horrible side effects and fear of eating too much.

    They aren't cheating when they have to deal with not just cravings, but desires for normal portions of foods.

    Or when they exercise.


    The idea of taking such risks and doing what I feel is akin to self harm in the extreme, horrifies me - but I reason that they are so truly desperate, they genuinely feel that they have no choice. And it can have positive outcomes as well as all the horrible things I think of.

    But one thing I know for sure it isn't, is easy.
  • mrs_joshica
    mrs_joshica Posts: 275 Member
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    You know, as a Christian, I get this all the time, and the same rules apply. A lot of people live in a guilty conscious. Oftentimes whenever we post, say, or do things that shine a light into the dark areas of their hearts, areas where they know they need to improve, areas where they know they aren't right, areas where they know they are not fairing as well as we may be at the time, it causes them to become angry. Many people want to stay where they are, untouched, unshaken by anything that would point out a change may be necessary, and oftentimes the anger, frustration, or bitterness is not directed in the right place, but rather directed at the person who is helping to shine the light, be it intentionally or unintentionally. All you can do is keep going, keep living healthy, keep encouraging others to do so, and keep shining the light in hopes that one day, you reach your goals, and maybe help others to do so.

    You'll also find that misery loves company, and a good amount of people walk in that "crab mentality", for those of you who don't know what I mean, watch a video of crabs in a bucket, many of them don't get out because they are too busy yanking each other back down as soon as one makes it to the top, I'm down, I want you to stay down with me, don't allow it, just keep going!