Mikes Daily Rant 10/22/2012 Topic: I hear voices

Many of you know my class reunion was this past weekend. So many things happened this weekend that I could share but it would take more than 1 installment to write about. I made an executive decision to not discuss any of it. Just know that about 3 of us decided to have a good time despite the failure of the weekend. We drank so much that the weekend that the whole weekend was overshadowed by it.

Although I ate and drank like a mad man this past weekend, I managed to not gain any weight. Even though I didn’t gain any weight I felt terrible about how reckless I was and rushed back on Sunday to attend my Sunday Advanced Spin Class. I drove about 90 miles per hour the whole way because I woke up late. Feeling hung over and unmotivated to get up, I pressed snooze until 10:00am. My intention was to leave by 8:00a.m

I managed to drive a 5 hour trip in 4 hours and to God be the Glory no tickets. I pulled up to my house and took my things out of the car and got right back in and headed to the gym. I signed up for the spin class and then went up stairs to the cardio machines. I try not to do that much running before this class because the class is so intense. However, things changed in a blink of the eye.

I set my treadmill to a very light jog. 5.5 Incline and 8 mph for 20 minutes. I figure I can run about 2.5 miles to warm up for class and it won’t be a big deal. I was wrong! As I am jogging, I hear “Come on fatty! Run faster! That’s to slow!” I look over and I only see 1 guy on the treadmill and about 10 empty treadmills. We are the only 2 on the treadmills so I assume he is talking to me. I am thinking no we haven’t met before but I really like that he motivating me by calling me fatty and telling me to speed up. So I listen to him and kick the treadmill up to 9mph and lower incline to 3.5. So the 20 minutes end and I’m tired as sin. I’m walking on cool down mode and I realize that I was able to put in half a mile more than planned and burned about 160 more calories than I normally do.

I look over at the guy who is running about 7 minute miles and he is on mile 4. I see that his body is close to perfect and it’s obvious that he lives in the gym. I don’t want to interrupt but I’m getting ready to walk away and go into spin class. I just simply say, “Thanks for pushing me to run a little faster on the treadmill today. I needed that.” He looks at me and presses the emergency stop button and jumps off treadmill.

He is attempting to catch his breath and looking confused he asks me what I am talking about. I say to him “when you called me fatty and told me I was running to slow. That made me increase my intensity.” He shakes his head no and says, “I wasn’t talking to you.” I look at all the treadmills and they are still empty and he looks at me looking at them. He says, “I was talking to my challenger.” Now I’m confused but me being the jerk that I am, I feed into the foolishness, I ask him who won? He puffs his chest up and says, “I always win!” He then does a fist pump twice against his chest then walks away. As he is walking away I say congrats and he just does a head nod.

I see him again this morning and he is on the strength machine. He does the exact same thing on the machines. He would complete his reps and then look at his body and say things such as, “You a light weight!” or “You don’t wanna see me!”

My rant today is more of a complaint.
I don’t believe that it’s fair for him to be able to bring in his challenger unless he pays for 2 memberships. Also their conversation is very one sided and I never get to hear his challenger’s trash talk. Finally, I have decided to be within close proximity by this guy when I work out because the way he pushes his challenger ultimately pushes me to work harder. I may have to start bringing my own challenger. However, my challenger and I will not talk to each other during the workout. We will just push each other silently.



  • kimpossible471
    kimpossible471 Posts: 268 Member
    Really liked this one. I need a challenger...the voice in my head these days is my own worst enemy. I'm going to remember your post today, and either retrain it....or fire it and get a new one.

    Thanks. :)
  • mrsvatitagain
    mrsvatitagain Posts: 275 Member
    ROFLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL, that is funny I really thought you were hearing voices, not that the guy was actually talking too and challenging hisself out loud...that is toooooo much!!!!! And only YOU would not be offended by what you presumed as a challenge from a perfect stranger...anyone else would upset adn offended and the guy wasn't even talking to them. LOLOLOLOL LOVE IT!
  • bvinette31
    bvinette31 Posts: 15 Member
    ahhh I hope he has guest pass priviliges! haha
  • amoffatt
    amoffatt Posts: 674 Member
  • amoffatt
    amoffatt Posts: 674 Member
    Love it! I hear Jillian Michales in my head all the time or I would say to myself "What would JM do?"
  • jfatheree78
    jfatheree78 Posts: 78 Member
    :laugh: You're funny.
  • BronnersHarris
    BronnersHarris Posts: 247 Member
    Brilliant!! Really amusing!!
  • ladypenel
    ladypenel Posts: 88 Member
    I hear voices all the time but thanks to you I now know who it is!! Lol!!
  • Perfectdiamonds1
    Perfectdiamonds1 Posts: 347 Member
    ROFL. I think I'll take one in the morning ROFL
  • nurselroy
    nurselroy Posts: 67 Member
    LMAO! At first I thought maybe you were just hearing things. I like the challenger idea, but um, yeah, that has to be a silent conversation.
  • MonicaLee92
    This is awesome! Maybe that's what I need!
  • Oishii
    Oishii Posts: 2,675 Member
    That's so funny! How clever to split yourself so that you can trash talk one part of you but still win! My only concern would be the possible loss of sanity...