I'm excited, but really really scared

Molly6

Hey everyone,

Wow...so here I am. My name is Molly and I'm a 21 year old senior in college. I have been worried about my weight for about 10 years, but I think that things got pretty serious once I started college. Here, I'm surrounded by stress and unhealthy food and its hard for me not to over do it. Over the past 3 years, my concern about my weight and eating have gone from an obsession to a binge eating disorder (whew...I always have a hard time admitting that so seeing it written out kind of takes my breath away). Again, college is a really difficult place to deal with such an issue because of the constant stress, late nights, overabundance of junk food, etc. I'm in therapy to deal with my eating disorder and body image issues and really, really want to get this problem under control. I mean, I'm young and I don't want to have this hanging over my head for the rest of my life...I really want to let myself enjoy who I am, what I have accomplished thus far, and what I have yet to accomplish without always thinking, "If only I weighed a little less" or "if only I looked like that in a bathing suit." So, as it is a new year, i thought it was time to try something new and I found myfitnesspal.com, which I am really pumped about. I have tried stuff like this in the past, but have never really let myself get completely involved for some reason...I guess I just wasn't ready. Well, I feel really ready now and I want to lose the weight, especially before graduation. While I am really pumped about this whole thing, I feel that I have had so many bad experiences and "failures" in the past that I am really really really afraid of messing this up. I live with a constant fear of another binge which makes me feel physically and emotionally ill. I guess that is part of the reason I joined this community. My eating issues are a sensitive topic and I don't feel comfortable talking about them with my friends so I wanted to find a community where I could vent my frustrations and fears and get support from people who have been there or who are dealing with the same thing. I am looking forward to this next step in my weight loss journey and would like to give myself a fresh, clean slate. So here I go...

Mindful_Trent

Welcome! I think you're taking a great step in joining this community - it's a great supplement to counseling. Just remember that slow and steady is best - changing habits and living a healthier lifestyle is difficult and will take considerable time and energy...but it CAN be done!! :happy: You will have setbacks (we all do!) but you just have to get back on the horse - don't let it get you down. A mistake is just that - a mistake. You just have to acknowledge it, learn from it, and let it go.

Good luck! This is a great community.

tmgirlie

I'm fairly new myself, but I saw your post and wanted to say welcome! I want to congratulate you because you are taking a good first step in the right direction. Like the other member mentioned, we all make mistakes... but you pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and continue. The key is to be healthier instead of "skinny" or a particular size. I too have the same thoughts: if only i could look like that... but we will look good in our own way and you'll know when you get there. Just take your time and never give up

DebbieW

Molly6 - WELCOME to mfp.

Thank you for being so open and honest with yourself and brave enough to share your personal struggle with all of us on mfp.

I truly admire your honesty and your desire to get to a healthy weight.

Unfortunately almost everyone has to deal with negative self-talk and poor self-image issues, but we can overcome them though with constant work.

These are the strategies that I use and it does help:

1. Everytime you hear that "voice" in your head say something negative about you, say "STOP" inside your head back to it. Immediately counteract that negative thought with a positive thought. Example "Oh I can never lose the weight, I might as well give up", change it to "I'm so proud that I'm taking the steps to making healthier for me food choices, I'm so proud that I went for a walk, I am on the road to being healthier, I'm so proud of me".

2. Prepare your food for the day ahead of time to avoid grabbing anything you see because you're hungry. I make my breakfast "automatic", meaning that I eat what I already know is a healthy food choice. Then, pack healthy snacks in your lunch bag, pack a healthy lunch. Make sure that you watch your calories and your portion sizes, this will make a huge difference in your weight loss goals.

3. Accept yourself and love yourself. It's amazing what happens in your life when you do this. It changes your karma. Your don't have to be "skinny" to love who you are. Be proud that you are you and be your own best friend. Help your best friend to make those healthier choices. Tell your best friend what a great job she is doing. Pat your best friend on the back, don't be so hard on her.

Just love your best friend, "you".

Good luck on your weight loss journey. You can do this, stick with mfp for support, we are all here for you.

ultraviolet29

Welcome, for you to be so willing to share with everyone you seem ready to do this the correct way. Im 21 and in university so i know what you mean about the junk food, stress and late nights etc..
To help with the junk food, i simply threw out all my old rubbish and bought healthier alternatives, i eventually plan to wean myself off them altogether, but i dont want to have nothing when im studying because i will just goto the shop and get the biggest bag of crisps i can find and eat them without realising what i am doing!
Its a good community here, i only joined this week but i am already eating healthier and love the food diary as this helps me make the right choice and the support really helps you when you have a craving.
I wish you lots of luck in your journey, we will all be here to help when you need it

amicklin

Welcome, welcome! I am also 21 and in college but only a Sophomore at this point. College can really take a toll on your weight. Keep up with MFP and we will give enouragement along the way. You will do great! :happy: :drinker: