gross out stories

clydethecat

i think gross funny is one of the best kind of funny

so heres my gross out story of the day:

i was having a purrfest with one of my kitties, she was all snuggly in my arms. all of a sudden the dog came barking her "i'm going to kill a fool" bark down the hall. baby kitty got her back up and jumped out of my arms. a little bit later i noticed this little brown thing in my arm. i had just been eating vanilla oreos and thought i dropped some on my arm. so i licked it off. it was then that i realized my terrible mistake. see, baby kitty is a nervous pooper, so what i licked off my arm was actually baby kitty poo! lol... i've been rinsing my mouth out with salt water for the last few hours.

k whats your gross story

vice350z

Years ago left a restaurant with a bunch of people. Back on the road the food hit my stomach bad. Me and my friends have a crap-o-meter system..plus add in the fact that I have a slight bathroom phobia where I don't like to #2 unless its absolutely necessary...i have all the single-seater rest stops planned out along my route to work. I really wanted to make an app for it but Charmin beat me to it.

Anywho, the rating system goes as follows:

0-5..doesn't even register
6..you can feel something's there but you don't cancel plans over it...it can easily go away
7..you can feel something's there but you realize you may have to make a pitstop somewhere. It goes away if you're lucky.
8..unless you take care of it before leaving the house...you might as well cancel plans or plan on stopping somewhere
9...if you're out and about, you better find a bathroom quick
10...well, this needs no explanation.

We were about 15 mins from my house and I hit a 9...i was doing about 115MPH in my car that night trying to get home..i then hit a 9.5. I was driving clenching for dear life, holding myself above my seat as I raced down the highway...all the while my bro laughing.

That was it, i couldn't take it, got off the exit and went into the woods. I came back boxerless and sockless. Next day I has a slight case of poison ivy on my cheeks.

There's my gross out TMI story of the night.

lstnlondry

Thank you! I prefer dark funny but this one gross story was funny. Hello from Solano County!

Okay, both were funny

clydethecat

oh my god, that is a funny story! lol.. thanks for the share

bikinibeliever

Just watch extreme cheapskates.....That was some gross stuff!

The woman doesn't use toilet paper. she rinses with water then dries up with a paper towel that she uses all week!!

She dumpster dives for her food. Then served it to her guests......and people wonder why I can't eat food prepared by others. :laugh:

vice350z

they guy from Hoarders took a pic of a toilet he encountered in one hoarders home..i **** you not that there was a pile of dirty toilet paper and who knows what else about a foot high outta the bowl. They just layered and layered on top of it.

WTF is wrong with people???

mikey1976

Just watch extreme cheapskates.....That was some gross stuff!

The woman doesn't use toilet paper. she rinses with water then dries up with a paper towel that she uses all week!!

She dumpster dives for her food. Then served it to her guests......and people wonder why I can't eat food prepared by others. :laugh:

what the heck oooo gross i seen that show once and it literally ticked me off for a week

charmander89

I have one!

The other day I went to brush my teeth and noticed my toothbrush was wet. I asked my brother if he had accidentally used mine and his response was, "Oh, I couldn't remember which one was mine, so I've been using them both." Gag!

Mina133842

I saw one of the Hoarders shows where the people would go in water/juice bottles, and just put the cap on- and the really gross part- they just left the bottles in their house- so gross. seriously!!!! EW!!!!

I also saw that Cheapskate show- and thought, I couldn't be friends with someone that doesn't have TP in their house. Seriously gross. and the dumpster dive for food, and serving to guests- even if it hasn't been opened, it was in the TRASH - there are germs in there! EW! and covering the sofa that you got from a dumpster in a trashbag to keep the bed bugs off you- really?! I coupon, and watch my budget, but some things are WORTH buying new, or near new.

vice350z

I have one!

The other day I went to brush my teeth and noticed my toothbrush was wet. I asked my brother if he had accidentally used mine and his response was, "Oh, I couldn't remember which one was mine, so I've been using them both." Gag!

haha.

on a somewhat related note, I saw a woman drop her cigarette on the ground so I picked it up..she gave me an "eww, i'm not putting that in my mouth" look.

Ooooh, so a little dirt on your cig and its unsmokable....yet the cancer ingredients are no problem..lol

clydethecat

those shows are so gross! i saw one where they move a cabinet away from the wall and theres a dead cat behind it... how do you live with a dead decaying cat in your house?