How did YOU know?

catgirl711

How did you know that your significant other, wife, husband, girlfriend, boyfriend, fiancee, partner was THE one.
How did you know that they were the one you wanted to spend the rest of your life with?
I know there are a lot of people on here that have been married or with their partner for years, tell me how YOU knew that they were the one you wanted to be with?

I ask because I've been with my boyfriend for 2 1/2 years, we've talked about our future, marriage, kids all that jazz and back in August we moved in together. But since about July I've been having second thoughts, I've talked to him about it but it hasn't helped.

So... How did you know? Were you ever doubtful about the choice? I want some other opinions. My parents have both been divorced twice and I feel weird going to friend's parents with this sort of question. So I come to you MFP peeps.

WinnerVictorious

you're 22. why are you rushing? you are too young. go live life a little bit. have experiences. meet different types of people. discover what you really want out of life before you commit and settle down.

stephc0711

There's no way for me to explain this. My husband and I were engaged after dating 5 months, he proposed 2 days before I turned 18. We waited 3 years to get married, and have been married now for 6 years. I just knew it. He was and is my polar opposite on so many things, but we're very alike in others... We balance each other perfectly. If you are having second thoughts, weigh them, ask yourself why, and are they things that would keep you from being (mostly) happy together for ever? Everyone has ups and downs, so it could just be a "down" time. But, it's ultimately up to you.

amanda_ataraxia

Doubts and second thoughts are very normal. It is a huge commitment obviously, so being nervous is only natural.
I think many people are plagued by,"the grass is always greener," complex.


My husband has my exact sense of humor. We also share the same ideals. We also have many common interests. But, personality wise we would not be more different. But, it just works for us.

We were married 5 1/2 years ago when I was 22 years old and I have no regrets.

Mina133842

if you don't know, then, YOU KNOW. So, if you're having second thoughts, then wait.

For me, it was realizing, that I honestly don't know what I would do if he wasn't there- we started off Long-Distance, and we were both willing to move, because we loved being together, and couldn't stand being apart. Even the days he drives me crazy, and makes me furious (we too are opposite in many ways, but similar in important ways too) I still couldn't imagine my life without him. We've been married 5 years, but lived together over 7 years.

Hope that helps.

MrsAgi

LOL, he hung around so long I eventually gave in to the inevitable and threw a`party:drinker:

well, sort of.... TBH I didn't know he was the one. after a few years living together on and off and neither of us taking up other (better) offers, I finally realised I was already in a long term relationship and might as well accept it formally. He says he knew I was the one really on, but I'm not sure he did really- he was looking for a permanent relationship and I just turned up at the right time

didn't get married until we ad decided to try for kids, but had been living together for 7 years by then.

Will be our 20th anniversary (of being together, not being married) in a few weeks, and we've grown closer over the years. I can't imagine life without him, despite all the problems life has thrown at us, and I can't see how anyone else could possibly match up to him in many ways (although there are certainly some things about him that could be improved upon!)

zyxst

He can recite the Cheese Shop sketch from memory.