Mike’s Daily Rant 10/26/2012 Got 2 B Wealthy 2 eat Healthy
Replies
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My boyfriend thinks its INSANE I (we) spend $150 on groceries each week. I explain that all the food we need to make the dinners I cook every night come to about 50ish dollars. He refuses to admit that the extra 100 comes from all the extra crap like the processed foods, cookies, cereal and lunchable type things him and his daughter demand. If he could just understand the amount we could save...then he gives me crap about the one or two $3 bottles of wine I buy a week! :P0
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Good post. Many people could use a friend like you. It just comes to the fact that sometimes people aren't ready to change. She was probably hoping you'd come over, say oh, stop drinking soda, and you'll be fine. When she realized it's a lot more difficult than that, and her whole diet needs an overhaul, she probably became overwhelmed.
Hopefully she'll come back to you soon and apologize for her ways. It's hard to accept that everything you've been eating for your whole life is wrong and bad.0 -
Hey, at least she knows you're still there if she changes her mind and decides to make the change. I don't think you wasted your time though. Any time you are able to educate someone is time well spent. They can no longer plead ignorance and have the choice whether to make the change. If they don't, then they only have themselves to blame. They can't claim ignorance. You demonstrated that 'it's too expensive' is not a valid excuse.
Thanks for your 'rant' though. It was very good to read and a reminder that I need to get myself to the grocery store after work to get some fresh food for my own healthy eats!0 -
I commend you sir.
I too get annoyed when people complain about the costs of healthy food. What I want to ask, is where they are seeing this said "healthy food". If you have the opportunity to support small stores or farmers markets- DO. The produce is much cheaper than those big name grocer stores (*cough* Safeway...), and you often find those 'special' healthy treat foods for a fraction of the price. You do not have to shop at Whole Foods to eat healthy.
Anyway... I too would be deeply offended, and I am glad you said what you did. I think if anything, you have planted the seed and she will be thinking about what you have told her a great deal.0 -
I've heard that one before. There is a school of thought that says poor people can't afford to eat healthy.Today’s rant was inspired by a conversation that I had with a friend. She wanted to know how I am able to afford and maintain a healthy lifestyle without going broke.
There is no way that I spend more on food since I started eating healthy. It's not real complicated either. 1) Junk food is expensive and 2) I don't eat so damn much food anymore.
THIS. I've recently had my hours at work cut back. Drastically. I have a mortgage, car payments and tuition. And suddenly my eating is under control and I'm losing weight nicely. My coworkers have noticed. It started out because I could not AFFORD to eat the junk, nor so much of it. Portion control and healthy food (and shopping a couple of times a week) equals big savings. Oh: I also discovered that green leaf lettuce grows wonderfully in a pot...fresh salad for MONTHS!!0 -
First off, I was looking at your pictures in your profile and have to say you did a great job of making yourself healthier. Very impressive. Congratulations.
Second, as you found out, you really can't change anyone else, even if they say they want to change. It comes from within. I hope you can salvage the friendship if you feel it's worth salvaging.0 -
Loved it!!!0
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You sir, are awesome
You think so? I think you are as well!0 -
Sometimes I look at a carton of fresh berries, and i think $3.00! Then I remember how I thought a fast food meal for $3.00 was a real bargain once upon a time.
Great logic. I feel that way about grapes but grapes are a bonus for me so sometimes I dont get them However, I dont buy cookies because the grapes are too expensive.I just buy more apples or whatever else is a cheaper fruit that day.0 -
Nice..Hopefully she'll listen to you
The choice is hers!!! *In Captain Planets Voice*0 -
Sometimes I look at a carton of fresh berries, and i think $3.00! Then I remember how I thought a fast food meal for $3.00 was a real bargain once upon a time.
+1
My only problem was growing in the mountains and being able to pick them for free and extremely fresh.
Lucky You. I grew up in the city but loved traveling to the country to get fresh produce and nuts as a kid. Eventually city life caught up with me and put on hundreds of pounds.0 -
i love it, rant on!!!
Thank You I shall.0 -
You did what she asked, but as you said some people are not ready for change. People have habits and for some it is easier to break then others. You are a good friend for trying, she on the other hand was not so much by tossing everything you said.0
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I
you. You make my day better and I completely agree with you!!! I've been able to save at least $50 every shopping trip (I only shop when I get paid the 10th and 25th of the month or else I spend the money on other things. I suck at saving money 
) 0 -
'Pisstivity' <--- my new favourite word!
I love that you would do that for someone. I hate that she hasn't taken your advice. I hope she will some day, when she's ready.
With our little house there is no pantry or big freezer, so it's hard to be as 'naughty' :laugh: I don't know anyone who shops less than once a week, I don't think.
LOL you like Pisstivity? I dont mind doing anything that for someone that needs my help. However, they have to put forth an effort to help themselves. I think that she will. I think she was more hurt that I was not coddling her. I have been there myself and I had nobody to coddle me. Coddling actually impedes progress in most cases.
She has a huge home with large everything. So there is more room for junk. I told her that the junk food is best if its out of sight out of mind. If its not in the house, you wont crave it "AS MUCH" Cravings come but they go away if its not as convenient. Just my thoughts.
I shop 3 times a week because I love tyhe freshest of produce. I also keep a stock of frozen veggies in case I cant make it to the store.0 -
I have saved a bundle eating better. Things like cabbage, beans, cauliflower, sweet potatoes, etc. are super cheap. I'll admit to also stocking up on Lean Cuisine when it's on sale too, because sometimes I just don't wanna cook.
All wonderful foods that are very inexpensive but when people claim to not like certain foods it makes it harder. I tried to put things on list that she liked and would eat but she rejected most things.0 -
She then texts me 5 minutes later and says that I was mean and hurt her feelings. I texted back and told her that she hurt my feelings as well. She wasted my time, lied to me and does not trust what I say. I told her that if she didn’t buy Oreos and lays that she could use savings from those things to afford fruit and vegetables.
Umm Lays potato chips are on sale for $1.99 a bag, I was going to buy the dill ones.. I like them.. Don't yell Mike0 -
I for one had no problem getting fat on home-cooked meals with lots of fresh vegetables, etc. I mean, an extra portion of quinoa or mashed yams will still get ya.0
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You sir, you are a good friend. No, you are a FANTASTIC friend. To take the time to provide both positive & negative feedback, understand & truly help your friend to such magnitude is commendable.
Proud to have you on my friend list! Keep up the good work & as always thanks for sharing your unique perspective!0 -
She then texts me 5 minutes later and says that I was mean and hurt her feelings. I texted back and told her that she hurt my feelings as well. She wasted my time, lied to me and does not trust what I say. I told her that if she didn’t buy Oreos and lays that she could use savings from those things to afford fruit and vegetables.
Umm Lays potato chips are on sale for $1.99 a bag, I was going to buy the dill ones.. I like them.. Don't yell Mike
Dill Pickle Lays = Oh so GOOD!!!0 -
This is such a great post and it's all true. I cut my monthly grocery bill in half just by not buying processed food, drinks, and really planning my meal around healthy fruits, vegetables, and lean meats. With the exception of bread and condiments, I don't buy or eat any processed foods and I plan my meals first then make my grocery list. I'm very fortunate in that I've never met a fruit or vegetable I didn't like and I'm happy to eat tofu, chicken, and fish forever (I don't like pork and I'm indifferent about beef) so it wasn't a big change for me to start eating better. Too bad about your friend.0
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I am going to take your advice!!! Im tired of spending my money on processed junk just cuz my husband and his parents like it! Im going to be healthy even if they wont be!!!0
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Funny you should post this just as I realized the same thing (before I read this)
I made inquiries at a local gym and realized I really need the gold membership which is priced at a little over AU$1000.
Ouch! a bit steep I thought, too much, how can I possibly justify spending that much on me? Then I realized I can pay weekly which brings it to just under AU$25 <
a bit less than a family meal at macca's or a packet of ciggarettes.
I am definitely worth more than that, so I am going back up there (sans kids) and signing on the dotted line! I've already noticed that I spend less on groceries and as an added benifit of not giving the kids processed junk, my 14 year olds zits have cleared up.0 -
I'm impressed..Im not sure I could find something rant worthy to write about every single day.
Well people always give me something to run my mouth about.0 -
Enjoyed reading this story. Except for the fact that it doesn't look as if YOU need more MFP friends, I'd like to have you as a friend! You gave very good advice.
More friends the better.0 -
Wow great job on your weight loss. When you make the switch to a healthier lifestyle everything just falls in place.
Amen.0 -
You can't change them if they don't want to change. See if shell do a weeks worth of food diary. Have her add up what it costs to eat that. You do the same.
Right now she is not speaking to me. But when she is I will approach he situation totally different.0 -
Today’s rant was inspired by a conversation that I had with a friend. She wanted to know how I am able to afford and maintain a healthy lifestyle without going broke. I answered in simple terms (In My Opinion) but she didn’t understand. I personally believe that when you are LOSING weight you GAIN a sense of awareness. You realize how wasteful you are and then you stop it. The answer that I gave her is buy what you need, desire what you want.
I asked her when does she go grocery shopping? She told me that she goes shopping every 3 weeks. I expressed to her that going shopping every 3 weeks is a problem. She wants to know why, so I come over and give her a workshop based on how I shop and save. The first thing that I do when I enter her home is walk straight to the refrigerator and the pantry.
I am judgmental in most situations but this time I say nothing because she is taking the first step to improve, which is addressing the issue that she has by asking for help. Top shelf of her French door style refrigerator is stocked with soft drinks, fruit juices, whole Milk, and pitchers of foreign drinks made from powder and water. The next shelf is stocked with leftovers galore. Leftovers include Lasagna, steaks, Pizza, and other miscellaneous items. Crisper drawer is filled with processed meat and cheese. Side compartments have condiments and marinades as well as cans of soda. Her freezer is full of Hot pockets, TV dinners, decadent desserts frozen beef, chicken pork. I knew this would be a challenge but I took it on.
Her pantry was no better it was full of things such as Mac and cheese, more soft drinks, chips, cookies, little Debbie pies, pasta, rice and the list goes on.
I made her a grocery list based on what was not in the fridge, freezer and pantry. I also made her and titled it “foods and drinks that make me fatter.” She hated the foods that were on the make me fatter list because it was everything that was already in her kitchen. The grocery list consisted of fresh veggies of her liking. I told her it’s quite a commitment with fresh veggies. I let her know that you have to only buy what you know you will eat before going back to the grocery store or they will go bad fast. I also let her know that flash frozen veggies are just as good and last longer. Plus it's better to occupy space in freezer with frozen veggies than hot pockets and desserts. I also put lean meats minus ground beef and replaced it with ground turkey. I added low fat milk and didn’t put any soft drinks or beverages on the list. So veggies, fruits, lean meats, ground turkey, turkey sausage kielbasa, poultry, fish and a few extra items to brighten the list such as yogurts and low fat sour creams to top it off. I even gave her a rough estimate of how much those items cost. If she purchased everything that I told her to purchase she would be saving about $70.00 more than what she normally spends. She thanks me and I keep it moving.
I call her and tell her that I left my hat at her house and that I’m on my way to get it. She tells me that I don’t have to because she is out right now and as soon as she gets home she will be leaving the house again. She volunteers to bring it to me. This sounds strange to me so I decide to just meet her at her home and wait until she gets there. She pulls up with a trunk and backseat full of groceries. She looks shocked to see me there and refuses my help taking groceries out of car.
I knew the reason why she refused my help but I didn’t tell her that I knew the reason. The reason was because she didn’t buy what I wrote on the grocery list. She purchased from the “foods and drinks that make me fatter list.” This pretty much disappointed me. I almost reached the point of pisstivity. I wasn’t disappointed because she purchased all the wrong things. I was disappointed because she didn’t purchase any of the things that I recommended her to purchase. It made very little sense to me but I wanted an explanation. I didn’t go through her bags but I looked at the receipt. The receipt indicated that she had oreos, more chips, pizza rolls, no fruit or veggies, more ground beef, steaks as well and more pork chops.
I politely asked her why she wasted my time? She gave several excuses. She stated that the fruit and veggies were expensive. She stated that the ground turkey looked very pale and unappealing. She also went on to explain that she needs her liquids to have flavor and that she can’t just do water. I looked at her with the facial expression that she understood. It was that facial expression you use when someone is lying but you are indifferent about it.
I grab my hat and tell her on my way out that I understand she is not ready to commit to a lifestyle change. I also tell her that I will leave the grocery list on her fridge and I’m tossing the “foods and drinks that make me fatter” list. She knows exactly what’s on that list because it’s everything that’s in her kitchen. I walk out.
She then texts me 5 minutes later and says that I was mean and hurt her feelings. I texted back and told her that she hurt my feelings as well. She wasted my time, lied to me and does not trust what I say. I told her that if she didn’t buy Oreos and lays that she could use savings from those things to afford fruit and vegetables.
I was not able to go into all the benefits of eating healthy because she is just not ready to hear it. However, I let her know that I don’t make a lot of money so I cut back in other places to sacrifice. I stopped buying cookies, candy and chips and put that money towards fruit veggies and healthier foods. It’s a small sacrifice and very worth it. So you don’t have to be wealthy to eat healthy. It all pays off later though. The cost of my insurance was cut in half when my weight went down, I eat less food but more often and I don’t pay as much for groceries because processed stuff costs more. If this were the case all wealthy people would be thin and all poor people would be fat. This thought is absolutely rediculous.
I have said this many times to my friends before. I am kind of selfish. However, it would be pretty selfish and unfair of me to leave this world due to something that I can control, such as my weight and health related issues DUE to my weight. I tell my friends that If they are over 275 pounds, I will NOT be a Paul Bearer at their funeral but I wish them luck in the afterlife. It would be totally unfair for me to break my back trying to move their heavy body. I have to live here for a long time after they are burried and I need my back to work properly. I refuse to have a weak back while you get to lay on yours all day and night in a comfortable coffin for the rest of eternity.
MikeMontana1914
Holy crap, that's 5 minutes of my life I'll never get back.
Pall bearer0 -
I like this because now realized what I am doing wrong. I need to shop weekly and plan ahead. Thank you.
Did I help you realize that? Wow! I feel good!0 -
While I understand your motives and applaud them, perhaps in this situation, once you realized that she was not ready for a complete overhaul of her diet and lifestyle, suggestions for small steps that could make a big difference would have been met with greater success.
If she's not going to give up the frozen pizza, she could at least make it healthier by buying plain cheese and adding veggie toppings before baking. Encourage her to experiment with recipes. Lasagna can be a very healthy meal by simply switching to reduced fat cheese and using lean meat. Why not encourage that, or even trying a vegetable lasagna made with zucchini, eggplant or tofu (if she’s brave enough for tofu).
So many meals that are generally thought of as being unhealthy can be just as delicious and much healthier with a few simple ingredient changes. I’ve found that many people find it easier to make these little changes instead of a full on change of everything they are familiar with. And they often go on to make more healthy changes one they begin to find recipes they like and notice the differences in their health and figure.
Sometimes the journey to health is made in baby steps instead of leaps and bounds.
Well said.0
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