Thanksgiving w/ the b/f's family... etiquette & eating tips!

1sneakykiki

Hey everyone!

So, Thanksgiving is in just about a month. My boyfriend and I are travelling across the country to spend the week with his extended family. I went to his family's Thanksgiving celebration two years ago -- it was INTENSE. I gained 7 lbs that week and enjoyed every minute of it. :happy:

Coincidentally, Thanksgiving is about the time that I'll get as close to my weight loss goal as I've ever been (if I can stay on track!). I've gotten into a groove of what to eat, when to work out, etc., and I just feel like Thanksgiving is either going to sabotage me completely or make me a social pariah with the boyfriend's family. ESPECIALLY since, as hearty eaters, they "don't believe I need to be losing more weight anyway". If it was my own family, it wouldn't matter as much, but I don't want to be the weirdo girlfriend who won't eat the good food they slaved over. I'm almost kind of dreading it!

This is my first holiday trying to manage my weight. Do you have any advice on how to stay on track? How have you navigated the holidays in the past?

Thanks so much for your replies!

Im_NotPerfect

For actual T-day, I would let yourself enjoy. But since you're going to be there an entire WEEK. Keep on your schedule and tell them just that. You have a schedule for when you're back home and you don't want to get yourself off it for when you have to go back! If they can't respect that, that's their problem. Hopefully your BF will back you up, if he's a good guy!

mfpcopine

I would try to be very strict about my diet this month, trying to lose a bit more than usual if possible in order to offset the Thanksgiving meals. I might consider asking my boyfriend to tell the family that I'm trying not to overeat or overindulge. I would also build in some kind of activity every day. I don't know anything about you, but seven pounds over just a few days actually seems like a lot to gain and I would not enjoy that. I'd feel bad about it.

C00lCountry

Try small amounts on your plate as well. I find that helps out cause then when you go back you are giving body more time to tell brain it is full.

dlg1467

This is a good time to work on portion control. By all means have what they offer, just try to eyeball your portions to keep them reasonable. Have a small piece of pie, avoid the appetizer and nibbling treats that add up. No one will notice so much then. Try not to drink your calories. I enjoyed myself at our Thanksgiving I had a some of everything, just tried to keep it smaller.

dakotababy

Well one thing I noticed is that I will ALWAYS get asked/forced to go grab seconds. MAKE SURE your 1st plate is TINY. You can expect to be pressured to go up for more. Pick veggies, and protein - go low on the carbs.

Also remember dessert...dont forget about the dessert that will be following a meal. Try to get the smallest piece you can. Some families have other alternatives - pick the healthiest.

Plan to exercise through out your stay.


Or you could be assertive and just say "No I am full - I will get sick if I eat any more". That will usually stop the pressure from others to eat more. (Make sure you have a look on your face that your going to actually get sick if you eat any more...struggle to talk, cover your mouth and pause as if you are about to puke).

corn63

If you don't want to enjoy your day (meaning: eat whatever the F you want), I would get my foods and make sure that NONE of my food touched each other as a way to keep my portion control down. Of course i'm not going to scream that my cranberries are jerking up on my potatoes, but it's a good way to eyeball your portion size. And get in all the foods you want

bookwormwendy

I feel your pain. My in-laws are determined to feed you when you visit! They are kind, wonderful people but have told my husband he looks sick since he's lost weight. :huh: Anyway, Turkey day- indulge! The rest of the week do your best to stay on track. Just tell them your tummy has shrunk as you've minded your eating. Mine actually has. I can't figure out how I used to eat as much as I did. For as much as you don't wish to offend, you also owe to yourself to take care of yourself first.

rml_16

Eat a reasonable amount of the things you like most and if anyone asks why you aren't having more (which is RUDE on their part, BTW), just say you are stuffed and leave it at that.

Although, I don't ever notice how much other people eat. I find that very odd.

karenwill2

Thanksgiving is not actually intended for getting fatter. I will not dally from my course. I will eat till I get full and no more. I will continue with my proper choices and I will give thanks.

I don't know why anyone would be concerned if you are not overindulging but I would just say, "OMG! It is all so good. I am so stuffed but I really love the smells. Everything looks so amazing, I am so glad I tried a little of everything." Whether or not you did is a different story.

tikafly

offer to cook a side dish at Thanksgiving that way you know something will be "safe", and offer to cook dinner a night or two while you're there as well...portion control and try to stay active and you'll do fine. Have fun and don't be snooty about other people's food choices.

Also, It's possible that your previous 7lb gain was mostly bloat due to added sodium and extra food and not fat gain.

AnnaMolly17

I feel you, my family is Russian and Armenian, meaning that food is always a BIG part of the holiday season. I think as long as you're eating, you won't be seen as the "weirdo girlfriend who won't eat." What I try and do if I'm at a family function is try and fill up with liquids and lighter entrees (Double points if you complement them on the food!). I try and take a sip between each couple bites. If you guys are drinking, for your nonalcoholic drinks stick to water instead of juice. For alcoholic drinks, stick to wine or clear liquor with soda water, instead of sugary mixed drinks. And most important of all, enjoy it! You've worked really hard to look the way you do, so don't punish yourself too much because of a few days of indulgence!

Good Luck!

ShellyShuey

I find if you're honest and communicative, people respect your diet and will try to accommodate you. I agree that you should eat as you wish -- not CRAZY eating but flexible -- on Thanksgiving and then eat clean the balance of the trip. Get some walks and workouts in, you'll be fine. Aim to maintain.

mfpcopine

I don't know why anyone would be concerned if you are not overindulging ...

Some people are hurt if you don't stuff yourself with their food. Others are passive aggressive, urging food on people who they know are weight conscious. Sometimes it may be unconscious on their part. They don't realize they are trying to hinder the other person's weight loss.

I dread the holidays, not just because of inconsiderate people, but because of my own tendency to cave in the presence of tempting, high-calorie, low-nutrition foods. It's a particular struggle when you are dining with people who are not health conscious and obese.

This is an example of a lifestyle change. Many of us grew up learning to stuff ourselves silly on Thanksgiving. Now it's no longer acceptable to feel that the most energetic thing we can do after a big meal is nap or watch football. It's kind of gross, actually.

TimeWarp9

I feel you, my family is Russian and Armenian, meaning that food is always a BIG part of the holiday season. I think as long as you're eating, you won't be seen as the "weirdo girlfriend who won't eat." What I try and do if I'm at a family function is try and fill up with liquids and lighter entrees (Double points if you complement them on the food!). I try and take a sip between each couple bites. If you guys are drinking, for your nonalcoholic drinks stick to water instead of juice. For alcoholic drinks, stick to wine or clear liquor with soda water, instead of sugary mixed drinks. And most important of all, enjoy it! You've worked really hard to look the way you do, so don't punish yourself too much because of a few days of indulgence!

Good Luck!

Italian here. Same thing! In my family, it was (is!) an insult if you don't obviously enjoy the food prepared. The best way I found to avoid overeating at a family meal is to help with the serving, dishes and cleanup. You have to be slick about it, though. They can't catch on that you are up to something.

sugboog29

Portion control....try small bits of what you like! They will think you are wonderful wanting to try a bit of everything! Little will they know! :flowerforyou:

girlykate143

I read this guy's blog yesterday and thought it was hilarious. Maybe you'll get some bits of good info out of it.
Or not. Shrug. It's work safe:
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/dsjohndrow/view/converting-the-heathen-438529

Keiko385

Go enjoy, its one day but only eat what you are comfortable with, when everyone else is going for 2nd or 3rd you can always sneak off to the kitchen and offer to help clean up

OspreyVista

Oh man. I suggest letting yourself indulge a little bit. Have small portions of stuff you like. It's okay to have a treat day every once in awhile. I hate it when people tell me I don't need to lose any more weight. But I'd just shrug it off. ON thanksgiving, let yourself have a small bit of everything you like. Also, exercise too

bradphil87

Small amounts, but you should try a little of everything they made, if its store bought, leave it...that's acceptable, if you refuse to eat their cooking it can considered rude. It's like when I go to my moms for dinner, she makes everything....it's all pretty high in cals haha, I mean who butters green beans?!? Lol anyway, I eat some of everything, including the butter flavored green beans, and work out extra hard that day. I'd take an exta hour in the gym over hurting my moms feelings any day hope that helps!

JennKie1

I mean who butters green beans?!?

I do.....that's how I ended up here in the first place.