Can't get a "clear run" to make any progress! Any advice?

TriedEverything

Hi everyone,

I'm getting a bit annoyed that hardly a week goes by when some kind of social occasion doesn't crop up at some point, which makes it impossible to stick to my diet on that particular day. Or something else happens which makes it hard to stick to my plan.

I am a middle-aged mum, and believe me, my life is really not that exciting! But when it comes to healthy eating, things keep getting in the way. I am able to be fairly strict/sensible for 5 or 6 days out of 7, but it's not really enough, and I find that I am mostly maintaining rather than losing! :ohwell:

Has anyone else experienced this, and found a way to make the weight come off, despite frequent deviations from the diet? Should I be eating drastically less on the days when I am not doing anything special? (that in itself could be a challenge, as I don't cope well with very low cal diets! But if I heard it had worked for others, I might give it a go).

Any input would be appreciated - really floundering here, but don't want to give up seeing friends/family. I also tend to keep my weight loss attempts fairly quiet, due to having a failed so many times in the past! :embarassed:

sarahcuddle

I notice from your food diary that you do not log every day. How do you know what you are eating on those days? Even if you do have a social occasion, still log your food. Also I think you need to up the intensity of your exercise. Your body is obviously used to the walking that you do and you need to do more, not necessarily for longer duration but definitely of higher intensity. This worked for me to break a month long plateau.

bcattoes

Just how many more calories are you eating at these occasions or events? And how much do you eat normally? I don't think it's necessary to 'drastically' cut calories on good days in order to have the occasional bad day, but it is necessary to have a deficit over a week or so.

Also, I agree with the previous poster who suggested increasing the intensity of your workouts. This will burn more calories and help you keep more muscle as you lose. This is even more important as we age. You don't have to join a gym and start pumping iron (though that's great if you want to). Just do something that makes you work harder than you currently are.

TriedEverything

Thanks, I appreciate you both taking the time to reply

You are probably right about the exercise - will have to see what I can do to "up" it a bit.

Re logging - it's not always possible to log accurately if I'm eating out or whatever, so I tend not to bother - I just don't see the point if you're completely guessing - but maybe that's just me.

I think I probably do need to be eating a bit less on the days when I am in control (so to speak). but maybe it doesn't need to be too drastic.

bcattoes

Re logging - it's not always possible to log accurately if I'm eating out or whatever, so I tend not to bother - I just don't see the point if you're completely guessing - but maybe that's just me.

I do that too. Often my weekends are blank for this very reason.

mgmlap

I live by the 80/20 rule..as long as I am healthy 80% of the time..its ok to slack a bit the rest of the time. I log M-F...and leave Saturday/Sunday...if we are going out. If we stay home..I will log..

starjumper12

are these special cases ones for which you can plan? if i know i have a "lunch out with friends" or something, i might put in extra exercise that day or try to limit my calories in other parts of the day.

msudaisy28

Re logging - it's not always possible to log accurately if I'm eating out or whatever, so I tend not to bother - I just don't see the point if you're completely guessing - but maybe that's just me.

It's not exact, but logging something close will still help you be concious of what you're consuming. I travel frequently for work and would rather eat at local restaurants rather than chains. So I guestimate what I'm eating and drinking and usually try to log a similar food from a chain restaurant (i.e. eggplant parmesan from Olive Garden). It's surprising how quickly the calories add up - especially if drinks are involved!

jackjohnny5

Just don't limit your calories on other days. Your metabolism is going to have a hard time resetting itself in a healthy manner if you aren't giving consistent food. Just try to be good with the rest of your meals on a given day, try to eat the healthiest option possible when you do have a social occasion, and allow yourself some freedom every now and again. And I would suggest trying to find a workout that burns a few more calories for you if possible.

VorJoshigan

"...impossible..."

I do not think this word means what you think it means.




edit: make it clear that impossible was a qote from the OP.

kenazfehu

When I'm at home measuring my food, I will often eyeball my serving first, then measure it to see how close I am. I do this so that when I eat out, I have a pretty good idea what an on-plan serving looks like without having to weigh and measure. I get a to-go box and put the rest away. OR I work out extra before and after the meal so that I can eat more than usual.

azjenny72

Thanks, I appreciate you both taking the time to reply

You are probably right about the exercise - will have to see what I can do to "up" it a bit.

Re logging - it's not always possible to log accurately if I'm eating out or whatever, so I tend not to bother - I just don't see the point if you're completely guessing - but maybe that's just me.

I think I probably do need to be eating a bit less on the days when I am in control (so to speak). but maybe it doesn't need to be too drastic.

I agree it's not always possible to log accurately when you aren't controlling what is being offered... but there are so many things in the database that I try to find something even close to what I ate. It may not be entirely accurate but at least on those days I am getting a general idea of what I may have consumed in regards to calories, carbs, protein, etc...

For me it makes me think more about the choices I may when not in my own controlled environment. Gives me a guage to try to judge by so when I look at my log even if I'm logging hours after I've eaten. For the future I can know, if presented with teh same choices again which might be better or where I may want to cut down quantity.

So if I go out somewhere and say eat a large helping of lasagna... if I log it later and see that it was say 1000 calories... next time I may be more prone to eat only half of it and be satisfied.

Not judging, just giving some "food for thought" on the matter and where my head is. Good bad or ugly I try to log it all so I can see the patterns and make adjustments to keep a healthy lifestyle going and learn to fit it into an every day life.

sapl31

I would say even when you eat out and it is difficult do the best you can. Sometimes seeing it makes it easier to make changes. Logging keeps me accountable even on the bad days. Sometimes I will even make better choices knowing it will be written down later. Also if you have a special event plan for that. Have lower calorie meals on that day to allow for some room.

oddyogi

I don't mean this to sound rude at all but, I think maybe you just don't want IT bad enough. When you do want IT, you will either forego the "special occasions" (unless it's a huge one like a birthday, anniversary, Thanksgiving, or Christmas), or you will attend the special occasions and have control over yourself. It's not bad to allow yourself a small treat once or twice a week, but having one or two days of not logging and not caring will do you in.

Or you can add in strength training, or HIIT.

dorianaldyn

I ate "out" for two of my meals yesterday and I was able to log everything in.

At lunch they brought in Thai food at my work - now, I love Thai food so I was happy to have some! I limited myself to about to about a half cup of rice, I had it with a prawn and green bean red curry. I estimated the amount of each, including how many tablespoons of curry sauce I had and found what seemed like the closest estimation in the database. No, it wasn't perfect, but it was certainly a great estimate!

I went out to dinner with a friend too - and here I was lucky because the restaurant posted calories right on their menu and I was able to make a healthier decision to have a half sandwhich & bowl of soup rather than the whole sandwhich which is what I used to get.

You can have social occassions every day of the week and still stick to your plan. Just limit what you eat. Don't eat when you're not hungry. Don't keep eating just because it tastes so darn good. At a buffet, only dish out what you should eat and don't go back for seconds. At a restaurant immediately ask for a take away box and put half of your food in it so you won't eat it all (odds are you'll be full off half your meal anyway!). You can do it. Just keep the longer term goals in mind when faced with short term temptations.

krickeyuu

[/quote]

I agree it's not always possible to log accurately when you aren't controlling what is being offered... but there are so many things in the database that I try to find something even close to what I ate. It may not be entirely accurate but at least on those days I am getting a general idea of what I may have consumed in regards to calories, carbs, protein, etc...

For me it makes me think more about the choices I may when not in my own controlled environment. Gives me a guage to try to judge by so when I look at my log even if I'm logging hours after I've eaten. For the future I can know, if presented with teh same choices again which might be better or where I may want to cut down quantity.

So if I go out somewhere and say eat a large helping of lasagna... if I log it later and see that it was say 1000 calories... next time I may be more prone to eat only half of it and be satisfied.

Not judging, just giving some "food for thought" on the matter and where my head is. Good bad or ugly I try to log it all so I can see the patterns and make adjustments to keep a healthy lifestyle going and learn to fit it into an every day life.
[/quote]
^this^
I log everything just for this reason. I went to a Chinese buffet and I made up a plate of several different bites of food. I also had some soup. For dessert, I had a Sesame Ball--it was so small. When I logged all of my bites that night I found out that Sesame Ball was over 200 calories--WTF? I could have had a whole plate of shrimp or two bowls of soup for those 200 calories. And, it wasn't even good :noway:

Ready2Rock206

Too easy to fall into the trap of this restaurant isn't in the data base so instead of having the grilled chicken and steamed veggies I'll have the triple bacon cheeseburger w/chili, large chili cheese fries, a double chocolate shake, and a molten chocolate lava cake for dessert, because it isn't in the database EXACTLY it doesn't count right?

Log it. Close is better than not at all, IMO.

sarahcuddle

A friend of mine went to the cinema recently and had large nachos with cheese. Over 1000 calories!!!!! If you don't log it you'll never realise how much you are eating on your off days

kcoftx

I live in a foreign country. I do not have access to nutrition information like many of you do but I still do my best to guess and match it up as close to possible to something in the database. It is EASY to let those odd days get out of control and you can walk out tripling or quadrupling the calories without realizing it. In the beginning, it might be not be completely favorable but the more you do it, the more you realize what you CAN choose stuff that will have a better return for you. Absolutely log everything, even if it is a best guesstimate.

There are lots of things you can do to make it manageable.

*I take a week view on calories. I might eat 100-200 less on some days so I have more room for a higher calorie day. To me this reflects life more accurately.

*Balance it with exercise.

*If it is a chain restaurant in the US, you will have access to those calories. Go to the bathroom if you have to and look it up on your phone if you have one. If not, choose the best you can using some common sense and then learn from what you do so you can make better choices next time.

*If you already know where you'll be going, look it up before you go. Plan ahead.

*LIMIT YOUR PORTIONS. At buffets I only get one plate. I carefully choose what I will put on that plate. I try for better options when I can.

*Personally people know I'm logging so when I take a picture of my plate so I can more accurately log it later, they aren't surprised.

*If someone gives you a chance to suggest a restaurant, take them up on the offer and pick a restaurant you are already familiar with you can favorably choose from the menu.

*f you know you will be going out, lighten up on your other meals for the day. I might eat a 250 calorie breakfast instead of a 400 calorie breakfast and I make sure I pick something that will stick so I don't binge because I'm starving.

*Choose chicken or seafood, unless you know the count of something and it fits your budget.

*Choose dishes that aren't laden in sauces.

*Exercise portion control. This is the single best advice you can heed.

*Don't eat from the free stuff basket (chips, bread, etc.)

*Pick something that comes with veggies and if it has another side, ask them to double up on veggies instead.

*Skip alcohol, unless you know for sure you have room for it, and even then limit it. Do some research ahead of time.

*Skip dessert, unless you know for sure you have room for it, and even then share it.

*If you have to guess, pick the highest calorie version in the database. If there is only a homemade version, add a pat or two of butter to overestimate because restaurants tend to add stuff to drive up the calories.

You can budget your social life in. I do. YOU DO HAVE TO LOG IT. Otherwise you won't learn from it. The whole goal is not to depress you but to help TEACH you how to manage it. It is absolutely not impossible. I eat out frequently. It's definitely higher calorie, in general, than eating at home but there are good choices you can make.

Maybe at first start with an easier calorie goal of 0.5lb and try to go under for the weekly view. Then next look at the 1lb a week loss and set that up once you've become better at meeting your budget for the week.

Nobody said this was easy but it is certainly not impossible. You are going to have to make changes to reach your goal.

mulderpf

Not sure if you will read this, but this is my take on things:

1. Change your mindset - this isn't a diet, it's a lifestyle change. That's why I haven't done things too drastically, because it is something that has to fit in with the way that I do things. Diets are things people do for a limited time and when it's over, they go back to their old habits and it's usually the old habits that got them in trouble in the first place.
2. Log everything, even if it is a guestimate. This makes you much more responsible for the choices you make. By saying "I don't see the point anyway", means that you are free to have whatever without giving it a second thought. Even if it isn't accurate, you will at least be somewhat responsible and not go completely overboard.
3. I have been doing this since June, and log just about everything. There was only two occasions where I didn't log and that's because I didn't have access to a PC or mobile internet at the time when I went overseas. I have NOT given up on my social life, but I am now much more responsible for the choices I make. When I go to a restaurant, I choose the healthier option if I'm going to have wine and probably not have as much wine as I would've if I didn't have to think about it. When I go to the pub, I look for lower alcohol ales instead of having just anything. All these small things add up - even though they might not be accurate, I'm taking responsibility for my decisions.

The problem is, this is your life. You are always going to have social occasions and rather than giving up and saying "well, it doesn't fit in with my life", MAKE it fit in and let it actually teach you how to do things when you are out. If I ever forgot my phone or lost access to MFP, after many visits to the pub and going to restaurants, I have now at least learnt what I can and cannot fit in.

(Also, when I think that my estimates might be significantly off, I work extra hard by walking a bit more or trying to make up the calories somewhere else).

Bottom line is, this is what your life is going to be - take responsibility and grab the opportunity by learning how to cope with it rather than just giving up and saying "it can't be done". You don't have to be a bore!!

EDIT: And what kcoftx said while I was writing mine :laugh:

Koldnomore

Basically, If you are waiting for a 'good' week you will be waiting for a long time. Life does not just stop because we decide to change something. You will ALWAYS have situations when there is food and it's not in your control..always. Not everyone is on your journey and so you can not expect that everyone around you is going to stop living their lives just because you want to not be tempted.

If you want this bad enough you will make every effort, and if you aren't perfect don't worry about it. No one is 100% perfect all the time but logging every day is a step that I encourage everyone to do - even if you went way over - It does not matter how many calories you ate, only that you can SEE them and then you can make a better choice next time OR take other steps to mitigate it - like going for a long walk, or eating a little less the next day or that day or whatever.

Baby steps, but you need to take them.. don't wait because every day you wait to do it is a day longer that you won't reach that goal