My Daughter Called

Aesop101

I was laying in bed last Sunday when I heard the phone ring while I was dozing off. Something stuck with me about that phone call even while I was sleeping. Eventually in the wee hours of the morning I got out of bed a bit groggy and made it to the living room to get the phone. Then I stumbled back to bed and laid the phone beside me. Every now and then I would reach out and touch it to make sure it was still there. Finally I picked it up to see the number. It was from my Daughter's hometown. That could also be my niece since she lives there as well. However, I figured it was my daughter. I had heard third hand that she was getting engaged. So being a bit sarcastic I knew she was in need of a Dad Prop. I had not heard from her in 7 years or more though I had reached out 4 or 5 times.

In the wee hours of the morning I played the message. Sure enough it was her. She was engaged and her fiance' proposed in Paris. She wants to get married in the Caribbean somewhere. Before I responded to her message I called a woman friend. She said what great news! Let me just say at first I was going to get a bit haughty. I felt after seven years to call me just because you needed a dad prop was out of line. I mean when I'm done being the Dad prop will I go back into storage?!

However my friend got me to thinking differently. Then I thought about a time many years ago when things weren't going my way. A man I worked with said to me, "Ron, I know that people have crapped on you but you still have to do the right thing." I pondered it all. There's still a bit of rage in me. Then I wondered how will I make that phone call. Also, what strength did it take for my daughter to call me? I wasn't sure even how to start the conversation. I thought about it for a bit then decided to offer some advice based upon my marriage. Well sort of. My ex-wife has mental issues and is in assisted living. As I often say in jest, the home for the criminally insane.

Well I mentally work out the words. I call. "Hello." "Jennifer this is your Pa." "Hi dad!" She then repeats the message she left on my phone and adds she wants to get married in the Caribbean. Building from my ex-wife's history "If you don't mind I'd like to give you some advice. You should give him some kind of Ink Blot test. Tell him there's no right or wrong answer. But of course there is." She roars with laughter. We discuss our lives and what we have done in the past few years. The phone call ends with "I love you."

gentlebreeze2

I'm so glad she reached out to you. I hope the lines of communication continue to be open for you. In my thoughts and prayers.

rmwinters

This is the one time in life that a daughter NEEDS her father.

Pinkigloopyxie

How do you not talk to your own Dad in 7 years? I could see a few weeks or a month or three between phone calls, but that's really sad. If I had a Dad or my Mom was still living I'd want to talk to them once a week at least.

I'm not harping on your daughter, I apologize if I gave that impression, I just literally cannot comprehend it. People are strange.

thoseblueeyes

I am glad to hear that you were able to reconnect with your daughter. I hope you can keep intouch with her. Family is the best thing ever.

Brianna72994

I havent talked to my dad since I was 9 years old (I'm 18 now) And I can understand where shes coming from. I would want my dad there, I would feel so selfish if I didnt at least invite him. I am his only daughter. I hope you do go to her wedding! I'm sure she needs you there

Kenzieb07

I am happy to hear that you talked with your daughter and that she called you to tell you firsthand that she was engaged! Quite honestly, I did not invite my dad to my wedding. He had broken my heart so many times in the years leading up to it, that it wasn't worth bringing that hurt to the happiest day of my life. My stepdad was there and the others who have been there for me and helped me in the good AND bad times.

I am sure you and your daughter had a reason for not speaking for 7 years, just as I had mine for not talking to (still not talking to) my dad, but I hope and pray that you two can overcome it and repair your broken relationship. Congratulations to your daughter, and to you! Best wishes

angel823

" I know that people have crapped on you but you still have to do the right thing."

I needed to hear this...maybe not where u were going with this

But it helped me hearing these words

fortheheart

I read your post four times. I am considering over and over again if I should even comment. My dad and I go years without speaking. Most of it is on my part (the not talking to him). He is the most painful man. He says the most hateful and cruel things and he just doesn't make me feel good about myself. To be honest, I am afraid to be alone in a room with him.
We were talking for awhile up until May of this year after I had my surgery. My mother called to tell him how my surgery went. She said he was screaming at her over the phone. A few days later I called him and he screamed at me for being so careless with my health. That's when I decided that I can no longer carry the stress that comes along with keeping him in my life. Talking to him and knowing him should be a good thing. I shouldn't cry and get upset after the phone call. I shouldn't say that I never ever want to see him again. That's not a good thing. He called two weeks ago and I haven't returned the call.
But it doesn't mean I don't love him. He does have some wonderful traits. He is so intelligent and funny when he is in a good mood. BUT you have to talk to him when he is in that good mood. So, it's tricky...
..
I am sorry that it's been so long since you talked to your daughter. Maybe there was some harsh words and some bad memories. But you sound like you want to work on the past, or at least move on. It sounds like you want her in your life.
I have always wanted to be 'Daddy's Little Girl'. I missed out on that. Maybe you two can get back to bonding. It might be a wonderful thing. Someone like me would envy your desire to be with your daughter. Just try it.

LoraF83

This is the one time in life that a daughter NEEDS her father.

The ONE time?

Sorry, but pretty sure most of need our dads a lot more than that.

Jenny_Taylia

Great story! Be there for your little girl!

I never met my dad and finally I found him 4 yrs ago through facebook, he flew to visit...had a great time...sent him an invite to my wedding...gotta a reply card stating he was coming. YES!!! I always was so sad I wouldnt have m father walk me down the aisle and my wish has come true!!! I was sooooo happy



He was a no show at the wedding......and I havent spoken to him to this day and I refuse to.

TylerJ76

He was a no show at the wedding......and I havent spoken to him to this day and I refuse to.

That just breaks my heart..
:brokenheart:

pastryari