My motivation isn't nearly enough.

chelso1

I'm about ready to throw in the towl and give up. I'm sure all of you have had this problem, but it's hitting me, and it's hitting me hard. Im 21 years old, and a cosmetology instructor with low to medium activity level during the day. I work out about 5 times a week for 20 minutes of circuit training from the Jillian Michaels DVD 30 Day Shread. It is a maximum calorie workout, and definately kicks my butt. I do have an eliptical, but I feel I burn more calories doing the dvd. I only work out at night, because I get up way to early in the mornings to work out.
I started my new healthy lifestyle a month ago, with eating healthy, and working out 5 times a week. My goal was to lose 10lbs a month, which is about 2.5lbs a week. So far, I have only lost 4 pounds, and I stepped on the scale the other day, and all 4 of those pounds are back. Its frustraiting! I cannot even look myself in the mirror after seeing something like that.
I'll give you a brief history of why I am so down about my weight. Four years ago I was 18 years old, and I was a size 5. Now that I will be 22 in a few months, I am currently a size 15, and its starting to feel tight. Within these 4 years, only two things have changed in my life. 1) I became a vegetarian. 2) I was put on anti anxiety medications. Since then I was watched my diet as being a vegetarian, and noticed I was eating nothing but carbs, and absolutely no protein. I have not been a vegetarian for about 2 months now, and have switched to a low carb diet, which I have seen or felt no changes from. So this leads me to believe it is my medications that are making it so hard for me to lose this weight.
Its hard for me to see some people being able to lose so much weight in a month just from exercising, and I am losing 4 that I have already regained back. It makes me want to quit, and just be fat forever, because I dont see a good, healthy looking body anywhere inside of me.
I want to have that confidence I did 4 years ago, where I could go anywhere I wanted to go because I looked, and felt good. Since my 60lbs weight gain, I have developed a high social anxiety. I dont want anyone who hasnt seen me in a while to see me. I will duck and run so I wont have to run into anyone. I make excuses to not go out with my skinny friends, becasue I know no one will be looking at me and my shapes.
So I guess Im just looking for some serious support. I'm not good at expressing how Im feeling out loud, so hiding behind my keyboard helps me express my true feelings.
Does anyone have any suggestions, ideas, inspirations?

Please help, and thankyou for your time.

-Chelsey.

lunglady

Have you discussed your medications with your physician? This might be a good place to start.

You should also consider hat you may be gaining muscle which is more dense than fat. Try not to worry so much about the 4 pounds and keep at it.

I wish you luck on your journey. Keep your head up. :flowerforyou:

chelso1

Thankyou for your help! I have disgussed medications with my physician, and I keep getting switched, because every time I tell them that I keep gaining weight no matter what, and I dont want one that will make me gain weight, but I just keep packing on the pounds. I have switched medications so many times, that I feel like I've tried every kind.
I am going to make an appointment again, and look for some serious alternative options.

jawhwilson

If you have only been doing it about a month, have you figured in your period? That could make you bloated, extra hungry and so on. One thing I have noticed is that the exercize makes me feel better or less anxious. Maybe you need a different exercize, or try a few different ones? Also I noticed that if I drink at least six cups of water by 1 or 2, i'm less munchy the rest of the day. I add in the walmart on the go powders or the ocean spray fruit powders (similar to crystal light) and I can drink way more water than I need too. Don't give up though and be proud of where you are. And like the other person said, you have probably built muscles. My last thought is, keep track of your measurements you should find a change there.

fooja

well dont give up!!! maybe try doing your work out video and the elliptical. and maybe try tweaking your diet until you find something that works. just remember that if u give up, ur still not gna be happy, so keep on trying!!!!! good luck!!!

chelso1

Thankyou both! I will definatley try switching up my workouts.

And I will definately try the 6 cups of water before lunch. I also mix in the drink packets, and I find myself being able to drink way more. The only thing that happens is I get caught up in teaching that I forget where I put my water, or I just forget to drink it. I need to keep reminding myself to drink that water!

I will not give up, I just needed a little bit of some motivations from others. Its much appreciated!

kiffypooh

I agree you should talk to your dr. My sister was put on some anti-depressants or anti-anxiety meds before and it made her gain weight. She went into the dr and basically said, "the meds make me feel great until I gain weight then I'm anxious and depressed about the weight gain." I would also suggest doing some research so you can go to your dr and ask what he/she thinks about specific meds that may not have the side effects of weight gain. I know when i was on welbutrin (sp) for depression it made me feel more depressed then I've ever felt before in my life but I didn't want to smoke and wasn't very hungry (I'm an eater when I'm depressed, not a starver). So each one has their pros and cons.
This last part isn't meant to be rude so I hope you don't take it that way. Are you being completely honest with yourself about what you are eating? Are you logging everything? I'm the queen of, "oh, I haven't eaten anything today. Oh wait, I did have that doughnut...I almost for that apple I ate" etc. Just something to consider.
Also, how many cals are you eating? I know sometimes not eating enough can do it too. I also just read an interesting little thing from Jillian Michaels about ex yo-yo dieters (although I doubt you fall into that category).
Best of luck to you. You deserve to be the size you want to be and you deserve to be happy!

pbord30

Hang in there!!! Also take into count Soduim!!! That will make you retain water weight fast!!! I sometimes for get ok im staying cal but wait.........alot of the low fat low carb and cal is high in soduim because it helps the taste!!! Look at your Soduim hang in there!!!

chelso1

Oh thankyou!

I need to get in the habit of logging everything, but some things I just dont know how to log. Like if I go to a grocery store salad bar do I add in every vegetable I put in it, because I dont know if I used a teaspoon or tablespoon of peas. Do you use a food scale at all? Im interested in picking up one of those, so I can actually weigh out my food. Things like that are hard for me. I totally agree with your sister about the being more anxious, and even depressed once you gain weight. That is completely how I feel!! And would you happen to have that article about yoyo dieters?

Thanks for the sodium advice. I actually just added that into my counter today. Sodium is definately some evil stuff!

kiffypooh

Not a problem, that's what we are here for so YOU don't quit!!!! Here is the artical
http://www.everydayhealth.com/fitness-specialist/fixing-ruined-metabolism.aspx?xid=SendToAFriend
I LOVE Jillian Michaels and I LOVE her 30 day Shred DVD's. Which level are you on? I lost 5 lbs in two weeks when I went from 1 to 2. I don't have the courage to do 3 yet even though I've been doing them since Nov. Now I've taken a break from them and probably have to start over
I have a scale and I LOVE it. As far as a salad bar goes, if it's all veggies and you've counted the dressing I would just guess. I often tell myself, "I didn't get fat eating this stuff!" It's important to track, but I'm sure a 100 cal apple isn't going to do the same thing to me as that doughnut I forgot I ate this morning :laugh:
Do you eat out a lot? My husband and I use to eat out all the time, often a meal a day. We joined a gym last week and we decided to be able to afford the gym we would have to stop eating out. We decided to do one dinner out a week. This week we didn't eat any meals out since last Sunday from breakfast and I lost 4 lbs since last friday. I eat healthy when I eat out, but they put so much stuff in their food that you don't realize. My main meal out is a turkey sandwich on toasted whole wheat and a salad with balsamic vinaigrette dressing. You could try packing your meals.
I agree water is a huge help. One of my new years goals is to drink at least 64 oz a day and I've felt great since I started.
I also agree that I have less depression (I don't have anxiety issues but I've had depression in the past) since I started walking a year and a half ago. Try doing 30 Day Shred every-other day and the elliptical the other days. My friend does 30DS and then an hour or something crazy on the elliptical. But she's crazy :laugh:

chelso1

I love 30 Day Shread also!! I kind of switch off with levels 1 and 2 daily. Two days a week I work about 14 hours so I'll just do level 1 on those days, because its alot easier to me now. The only thing is am I not ready to move on until I can do the hard moves like Natalie, or am I ok if Im leaning more towards Anita? On level two I definately have to do the plank jump moves like Anita, because it kills my knees if I jump around like that. I am also nervous about level three. I thought I was going to die after the chair squats and the v raise. WoW that is hard!
The not eating out thing has been good to me also. I tell myself that I can only eat out one day a week also. Its hard at times when my friends want to go out just to chit chat, but then I'll just have a water. Its definately helped me financially too!!
I definately think Im going to try switching up my workouts. My only problem with my elliptical is that it squeeks realllllly bad when Im on it, and I've regreased all the parts imaginable. Its annoying!! So I try not to use it because it gets me irritated fast. :P

Thankyou for all your support! Good luck to you. The things you are doing seem to be helping you, so I have no reason not to listen to any of you!!