What motivates you to be "selfish" with your time?

ginnyadams
ginnyadams Posts: 22 Member
in Motivation and Support
I find my biggest challenge is taking the time to take care of myself (be selfish). It is always so much easier to do for others whether it is family, friends, work, community service than it is to get in that exercise or take the extra time to eat right. My biggest hurdle is using the word "NO". I get that the better I feel the more of I can give of myself (at least in principle) but have a hard time applying it in life.

What motivates you to take that time for yourself. If you have a crazy job or busy family, how do you make sure you fit that into your life? How do you manage it without feeling guilt?

Replies

  • Tina2Cats
    Tina2Cats Posts: 493 Member
    I get up extra early to do my execising before I eat. That is if I don't sleep through the alarm. I am getting better about saying NO to most fattening junk that is offered to me, especially during the holidays. I try to steal some time for myself at night, too.
  • ginnyadams
    ginnyadams Posts: 22 Member
    I think it is also saying NO to people at work and with my kids sports/school/etc. I tend to overcommit myself to please everyone else.
  • kaylabullard794
    kaylabullard794 Posts: 4
    Don't look at working out/eating healthy as being "selfish" with your time. Think about it as investing time for your family in the long run. You'll have more energy to play with them and won't die early from heart disease or whatever issue, and a variety of other things. You're helping yourself to help your loved ones.
  • EdTheGinge
    EdTheGinge Posts: 1,616 Member
    I have to cycle to get about at the moment so there's my exercise taken care of but I do add to it and people around me know how important this is to me and that I'm motivated and just let me get on with it. Even the girlfriend has accepted that I might be around the garage working out when she pops over but lets me get on with it.

    I've cut all the 'naughty' foods so I can't be tempted back into it, people try to tempt you back but say no and you'll feel you've achieved something right there.
  • CTCMom2009
    CTCMom2009 Posts: 263 Member
    I look at it as a benefit to my son and my husband... I am a better ME when I take the time for ME. My time is working out, my volleyball league, having a Girl's Dinner Out, etc. It's definitely not excessive, but it makes me a happier person. That in turn, is better for my son and my husband.

    Also with wanting to eat healthy, I know it is great for my son to see that and in fact, he will eat any kind of veggie or fruit!

    And since I'm losing weight, I know when my son is older, I will be able to be that active mom with him!

    It's not selfish to want/need/take ME time!
  • cheerforsteelers
    cheerforsteelers Posts: 686 Member
    If don't take me time and overload myself then I tend to get stressed out, which leads me to getting sick. I've found out my limit and I try to say no sometimes. I know that I need to stay healthy and in order to help others I have to help myself first. I look at it like that. :)
  • cecyvaquero
    cecyvaquero Posts: 154 Member
    I am married with 4 beautiful children and I have always done everything for them and I have never given myself any ME time. Now that I want to focus on myself I still give my family their time but I make it a part of my everyday give myself time also.
    What motivates me to be selfish with my time is that if I don't take care of myself I can't take care of my beautiful family. If I am not eating healthy and working out then I will always be a grouchy mom with my family and I don't like to be a grouchy person. I like to be happy.
  • Pedalpush
    Pedalpush Posts: 246 Member
    I can't seem to enjoy any "me time" without the guilt (recovering Catholic here). But I like to go shopping or get massages or have some spa time. Gym time or healthy cooking is a MUST and best for everyone around me and they all benefit so they have to deal with no guilt from this girl!
  • ginnyadams
    ginnyadams Posts: 22 Member
    The guilt part sucks doesn't it?
  • dnhardy
    dnhardy Posts: 59
    My motivation is wanting to love myself. They always say that in order to fully love others you must love yourself first. Thats my goal.
  • lousoulbody
    lousoulbody Posts: 663 Member
    I motivate myself to be "selfish" with my time with OUT the side oder of guilt. Look at it differently rather then using the word selfish, make it a must...you must work out today for your health and happiness. Saying "NO" is a lesson to learn, get a book, figure it out, your life will become much easier, once you say the words as soon as something is asked of you, wow, its a feel good thing and something to be proud of, its ok to say "NO" Give yourself permission to me happy and make the time for yourself, its now or never, and now sounds more achievable then never.

    Just say "NO" , and be good towards yourself, you deserve it!

    Cheers!!:drinker:
  • RunIntheMud
    RunIntheMud Posts: 2,645 Member
    My sanity. I don't feel guilty. Because if I don't take care of me, I can't take care of anyone else.
  • kmjenkins
    kmjenkins Posts: 396 Member
    I felt that way at first, that I was being selfish. But over time I have realized that if I don't take care of myself I can't take care of anything else. Putting yourself first and taking care of your mind/body makes you a better you, so everyone benefits from it and it's not selfish at all. I just tried to focus on retooling my mindset and reminding myself each day of this, it's worked so far and I feel better now mentally and physically than I have in my life.

    Good luck!
  • Calantorntain
    Calantorntain Posts: 172 Member
    Right now I don't live with my partner, and I don't have any children.

    But I think that this transition to a healthier lifestyle is anything but selfish! I hope to someday have children, and when I do, I want to pass on good habits to them. Furthermore, few men have ever complained about having a more attractive girlfriend :)
  • MissNations
    MissNations Posts: 513 Member
    Don't look at working out/eating healthy as being "selfish" with your time. Think about it as investing time for your family in the long run. You'll have more energy to play with them and won't die early from heart disease or whatever issue, and a variety of other things. You're helping yourself to help your loved ones.

    THIS
  • MissNations
    MissNations Posts: 513 Member
    If don't take me time and overload myself then I tend to get stressed out, which leads me to getting sick. I've found out my limit and I try to say no sometimes. I know that I need to stay healthy and in order to help others I have to help myself first. I look at it like that. :)


    And THIS.
  • DANCHAN1
    DANCHAN1 Posts: 113 Member
    Selfish? Always amazes me how women view themselves. What is that? Low self esteem? What that anyone would think doing something to get them healthy regardless of what it is, working out or preparing meals.

    Sometimes I cannot believe how women feel about themselves....sad really sad.
  • ginnyadams
    ginnyadams Posts: 22 Member
    I think for women it is often a combination of the strong natural instinct to be a caretaker (not a sad thing just something to manage) and from my perspective I started my career in a field that is traditionally very male dominated and there was always the need to do that extra to get the same notice as my male counterparts. It isn't always a self-esteem thing.....
  • Mischievous_Rascal
    Mischievous_Rascal Posts: 1,791 Member
    Don't look at working out/eating healthy as being "selfish" with your time. Think about it as investing time for your family in the long run. You'll have more energy to play with them and won't die early from heart disease or whatever issue, and a variety of other things. You're helping yourself to help your loved ones.

    This^^^

    Plus, I'm a much more pleasant person to be around after a bout "gym as stress relief", for sure!
  • santini1975
    santini1975 Posts: 175 Member
    Nobody is going to stop piling on demands unless you put your foot down. Especially if the have started taking you for granted. Set boundaries and make it very clear- I get one hour (or however long) without being bothered. Don't call me to ask for anything or the answer will automatically be "no". Don't bug me to tattle on your sister or you will both be punished. Fix your own damn snack. I'm working out and you don't exist :)
  • SarahtheJillianfanatic
    SarahtheJillianfanatic Posts: 117
    I feel a bit guilty, yes. But I emerged from doing aerobics this evening, and the baby and my husband were dancing to Russian gangsta music, completely happy and in their own world. It is good to know I'm not quite as indispensable around here as I like to imagine. :wink:

    But in general, I tend to wait till the kid is in bed and napping in the afternoon to exercise, read a book, whatever.

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