My 50 lb loss so far-my feelings on this

Cindy393

Well, I hit that magical 50 lb loss this morning. I thought ONEderland was something! I have been seriously thinking about alot of things and I need to write a few things down. I still have 38 lbs to go, but this feels utterly fantastic! For the first (and truly the first) time in my life, I can now look in the mirror and honestly tell myself that I love ME. This is a huge revelation. I've always been so hard on myself-I went from being a petite child to a huge, overweight preteen seemingly overnight. I had bad acne, greasy skin and hair and hated myself. I didn't hang with a good crowd because of my appearance and low self-esteem. Gradually I became the "life of the party" to fit in. I also inherited my father's big everything: hands, nose, feet, body structure. I was not thin when I first got married, but not really overweight by then. I grew too 'comfortable' in my life, and after 2 children, gained weight and held on to it. Every time I would lose weight, I was greeted with "where, in your little finger"? or the ex-*kitten* would call me 'tt', which meant thunder thighs. I had no self-esteem. The entire family was very controlling, so I now realize I turned to food, because it was the ONE thing I could control. When I was out of the house, I could eat whatever I wanted, so I was happy. Fast forward to my 50th birthday. I have been married to the man of my dreams for 3 years now. He is more supportive in this journey than anyone has ever been. In fact, he's doing it with me! I made the decision in June to ask my doctor for help because I couldn't stand it any longer. My self-esteem was being restored by my husband. I started eating clean and working out. I always hear "great job"! or "damn you look sexy". This "journey" I'm on has truly made me realize that I can do something and stick with it. I've never lost 50 lbs in my life. I honestly, truly love myself. That makes it worth it!

Katla49

Congratulations on your success, and on finding a great husband who supports you and diets with you. Mine is on this adventure with me, too, and it is so good to have a diet partner that is also a life partner.

okinmaine

Thanks for the mid-day tears!! I couldn't be happy for you!! I can completely relate to so many things in your story.....overweight teen, low self esteem, name calling. I get it. 50 pounds is such an amazing accomplishment but NOTHING compares to loving yourself. Keep going, my friend! You are amaazing!

tempie286

I am so proud of you! Congrats! You inspire me to keep pushing!

iluvmycats

So happy for you Cindy! its been great watching you go from "ok im gonna try that hill today" to conquering even bigger personal hills! This is a big day! Dont ever forget this feeling!! you earned it my friend!!!

Jen

Cindy393

wow, I did say that about the hill, didn't I??? Seems so long ago! And thanks to all of you, my great friends, for always cheering me on! It makes this all even more worthwhile!!!