Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris is so scary that when the Boogeyman goes to bed, he checks the closet for Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris died 10 years ago but the Grim Reaper is too scared to tell him
Chuck Norris can turn toast back into bread
Disney made a Chuck Norris movie in 3D but had to pull it out of theatres. In the first scene Chuck does a roundhouse kick and all the people in the first 3 rows of the theatres were getting killed
Chuck Norris and Superman had a bet on who was stronger. The loser has to wear his underwear on the outside of his pants.
Chuck Norris died 10 years ago but the Grim Reaper is too scared to tell him
Chuck Norris can turn toast back into bread
Disney made a Chuck Norris movie in 3D but had to pull it out of theatres. In the first scene Chuck does a roundhouse kick and all the people in the first 3 rows of the theatres were getting killed
Chuck Norris and Superman had a bet on who was stronger. The loser has to wear his underwear on the outside of his pants.
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OMG THANKS I NEEDED A GOOD LAUGH TODAY! THESE ARE GREAT KEEP THEM COMING!0
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Oh my. I certainly enjoyed these. Real rib-ticklers. Where do you come up with this stuff?
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These are awesome! I don't know who Chuck Norris is, but I can't stop chuckling! Did you make them up?
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most come from my youngest child who has for soem reason become infatuated by Chuck.0
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Oh my. I certainly enjoyed these. Real rib-ticklers. Where do you come up with this stuff?
omg that pic is so cute where did you find it at?0 -
These are awesome! I don't know who Chuck Norris is, but I can't stop chuckling! Did you make them up?
He's an american martial arts guy from many years back who became an actor. He was in a couple Bruce Lee movies before Bruce died. Made a bunch of badass martial arts movies of his own and then did some normal stuff and had a TV show where he was a Texas Ranger (sort like a police officer). He's in his 60s now but is still a great fighter.0 -
You should put them on a website. They're super! Maybe use MySpace or GeoCities.most come from my youngest child who has for soem reason become infatuated by Chuck.0 -
ghosts sit around the camp fire and tell Chuck Norris stories
Stare at an American flag long enough and a 3D image of Chuck Norris will appear.
Chuck Norris can hear lightning and see thunder
and my favorite- Chuck Norris counted to infinity, twice.0 -
You should put them on a website. They're super! Maybe use MySpace or GeoCities.most come from my youngest child who has for soem reason become infatuated by Chuck.
I posted a bunch on my BBS. Email me and I'll give you the dial up number. I've got it set with a 56k modem so the download speed is incredible.0 -
haha the Chuck Norris jokes are all over the interwebz can't believe you guys ain't seen em!
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These are awesome! I don't know who Chuck Norris is, but I can't stop chuckling! Did you make them up?
He's an american martial arts guy from many years back who became an actor. He was in a couple Bruce Lee movies before Bruce died. Made a bunch of badass martial arts movies of his own and then did some normal stuff and had a TV show where he was a Texas Ranger (sort like a police officer). He's in his 60s now but is still a great fighter.
Oh, thanks! I will Google him. I bet it will make the jokes even funnier. Do you have more?0 -
ok now i know this is a troll topic -_-0
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These are awesome! I don't know who Chuck Norris is, but I can't stop chuckling! Did you make them up?
He's an american martial arts guy from many years back who became an actor. He was in a couple Bruce Lee movies before Bruce died. Made a bunch of badass martial arts movies of his own and then did some normal stuff and had a TV show where he was a Texas Ranger (sort like a police officer). He's in his 60s now but is still a great fighter.
Oh, thanks! I will Google him. I bet it will make the jokes even funnier. Do you have more?
Sure, how many do you want? I can post them one at a time for you to create some sense of anticipation for you. That way you can have some extra time to think up your responses and practice them in the mirror to make sure you get full effects.
I love posters like you. You keep things lively.....0 -
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Post them all!0
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Chuck Norris is a douchepuppet who thinks we're all going to be plunged into darkness and despair because Obama was re-elected...
Oh wait, that's not a joke... that actually happened.0 -
Chuck Norris is a douchepuppet who thinks we're all going to be plunged into darkness and despair because Obama was re-elected...
Oh wait, that's not a joke... that actually happened.
What? Is that true?0 -
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Chuck Norris is a douchepuppet who thinks we're all going to be plunged into darkness and despair because Obama was re-elected...
Oh wait, that's not a joke... that actually happened.
Don't blame me when the sun goes out- I voted for Jill Stein.0 -
Chuck Norris is a douchepuppet who thinks we're all going to be plunged into darkness and despair because Obama was re-elected...
Oh wait, that's not a joke... that actually happened.
What? Is that true?
Unfortunately yes, he and Linda (his wife) were in a commercial supporting Romney's campaign, saying that id Obama was re-elected it would be the 'beginning of 1000 years of darkness' amongst other things.
It turns out he is quite the religious fanatic. Too bad such a badass had to turn out to be such a nutjob.0 -
It turns out he is quite the religious fanatic. Too bad such a badass had to turn out to be such a nutjob.
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Mate, I'm glad I'm Sydney cause you're going to be struck down by lightening (aka kick to head by CN)
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Seriously tho, didn't realise that about him. Hmmm.0 -
Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.
Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris says "More cowbell", he MEANS it.
Chuck Norris was what Willis was talkin' about.
Chuck Norris shot the sheriff, but he round house kicked the deputy.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
In a fight between Batman and Darth Vader, the winner would be Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris wants an egg, he cracks open a chicken.
Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
Chuck Norris's sweat has burned holes in concrete.
Chuck Norris makes onions cry!!!
Chuck Norris visited the "virgin" islands... when he left it was renamed to the islands.0 -
when chuck norris was born only the dr cried, cuz no one slaps chuck norris
chuck norris can get blackjack with one card
they invented the automobile to escape chuck norris, chuck norris invented the automobile accident
chuck norris uses tabasco sauce for eye drops
chuck norrris aced the SAT's by writting "chuck norris" for every answer
chuck norris lost his virginity before his dad did
instead of being birthed the usual way he punched his way out of his mother's womb. and promptly grew a beard
chuck norris' tears cure cancer. too bad he's never cried
chuck norris doesn't read books. he stares them down till he gets the information he wants.
when chuck norris is hungry he shouts BAKE and his food cooks itself out of fear
chuck norris isn't hung like a horse, horses are hung like chuck norris
waldo is hiding from chuck norris
the quickest way to a man's heart is a punch through the chest from chuck norris
if you spell CHUCK NORRIS in scrabble you win. forever
my fave...
chuck norris can swallow a rubix cube and poop it out solved
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My fave: Chuck Norris once fell into a lake. He didn't get wet, but the lake got Chuck Norris'ed.0
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If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more than you.0
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Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.
Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn't dead it is just afriad to move.
Some magicans can walk on water, Chuck Norris can swim through land.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.0 -
Once, while having sex in a tractor-trailer, part of Chuck Norris' sperm escaped and got into the engine. We now know this truck as Optimus Prime.
The original title of Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs. Chuck Norris. They had to scrap the idea because no one would pay $9 to see a movie 14 seconds long.0 -
My company drilled an irrigation well for Chuck Norris's ranch recently...true story.
We set up the rig and he just roundhouse kicked the pipe down hole.0 -
under Chuck Norris's beard is another fist0
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