This is really hard for me...

xohethr

I'm 25 years old, 5'9", and well, we won't discuss how much I weigh...but I'm a size 28. I've been fat my entire life. Not once was I able to shop in the Junior's department, or even the Misses... Straight to the Fat Girl section I go. I'd say around 90% of my family is overweight.

I've tried losing weight several times. I do the low carb, and I end up wanting sweets. I do the low calorie, and I feel like I'm starving at times.

I'm tired of being the "pretty fat girl" that everyone is friends with and nobody wants. I'm tired of looking in the mirror and literally crying almost every single time I see myself naked. I'm an amazing person on the inside, and deep down I know it, but this extra weight keeps me from shining...know what I mean? It's so upsetting.

I don't even want to be skinny. I'd just like to drop down to like a size 20. I could live with that. I just don't know where to begin. I'm incredibly busy, I don't have a gym membership because they cost me an arm & a leg. I don't eat raw vegetables. I literally almost throw them up every single time. (There's a long, sad story behind that, but we won't go there) I can deal with some cooked like onions, celery, carrots, green beans, peas, broccoli...

I need motivation. A swift kick in the booty. I WANT to get into better shape. Does anyone have advice, or words of encouragement, ways to exercise on the run, simple steps that'd make an impact on losing weight? ANYTHING? Help me out here!

Sorry this is completely random. I don't really know what to say. I just want to know that there's other people currently in my shoes, or that have been in my shoes. I don't wanna feel like I'm alone.

Thanks guys!
Heather

tristahenry

First things first... you are beautiful. You need to find the things that you love about yourself. From your profile picture you look like you have gorgeous eyes and an amazing smile. Realize that, no matter how much you weigh you have these things and focus on them when you look in the mirror.

As for diet, be sure you're doing these diets correctly or they won't work (I'm a fan of South Beach). You also need to experiment with how your body processes food. The bottom line with all of these diets is calories IN vs calories OUT. You need to be sure you're tracking your calories until you are familiar with what things "cost." A word of advice... I know its scary but open up your food diary. There are a lot of very knowledgeable people here on MFP who can make suggestions (kindly) on how to tweak your diet for better, healthy weight loss.

As for your veggies... keep trying them. I don't know the story behind your aversion but there are hundreds of vegetables and even more ways to prepare them. My husband thought he hated asparagus until I made them for him. Come to find out his mother pressure cooked them until they were grey or fed them to him straight out of a can. Vegetables are very important to your diet so you get the nutrients and fiber you need to be successful. The same with fruit.

Feel free to add me as a friend and lots of luck on your journey!

mgobluetx12

Hi Heather - You are definitely NOT alone. I have been a size 28 before and was a size 24 when I started on MFP in July (I joined last November, but didn't get serious until this summer) I have lost 37lbs since then and am now in a size 20.

The biggest thing I have learned is that exercise makes a HUGE difference!! I've been working out 3- 4 times a week using Jillian Michaels' dvd's and it's really helped my progress. I lost 100lbs in 2004 with lap band surgery and it took me 40lbs before I went down a size then and I'm already down 2 sizes and haven't even reached 40lbs.

Other advice I'd give you:

1 - Buy measuring cups/spoons and a scale. Weigh/Measure everything you eat. This is the only way you know how much you're putting in your mouth.
2 - Log every bite
3 - Find the right calorie goal for you. Mine wasn't what MFP suggested, it was lower. Yours might be higher. Just takes time to figure it out.
4 - Eat as many unprocessed foods as possible. Junk food made us a size 28. Foods like lean protein, plain greek yogurt, fruits, vegetables (eat whichever ones don't make you sick. I actually usually only eat 1 or 2 a day on a good day), whole grains, nuts, etc., will make us healthy!
5 - Remind yourself EVERY single day why you want to lose weight. It's easy to become discouraged, so recommit as many times day as you need to.

And - make some great friends on here; friends who will support you and provide advice if you need it. Please add me as a friend and we can cheer each other on. Good luck!!

kprattc

I'm not a skinny girl either, though looking back I wasn't as heavy as I thought. Maybe our issue is the same, self control. I make a vow to do or not do stuff and end up caving in fast. I think the important part for me is finding things I can do. For me the only way I am successful at loosing weight is this myfitnesspal or something like it where I track every single thing I eat. Most important, I can't lie, I have to actually write it all down, even if I eat way more than I'm supposed to.

I work out, so that's in my favor and would be in your favor too. If you don't have money for a gym, get a friend to go walking with you, or download free workouts online. The important thing is to do something. Make some change even if it's small and don't give up.

You can do it! Remember it's not just your size, it's also your health.

drkatiebug

Start by figuring out how many calories you need per day. Then log what you eat each day and be honest. The biggest advantage to MYP is awareness. Look at your nutrients and see if you're getting a good balance of protein, carbs, fat and fiber.

I find that eating lots of fruit helps curb my sweet tooth. Try roasted veggies like zucchini and onions.

Although I am old enough to be your mother, feel free to add me if you'd like. My diary is open. I eat real food so you can get an idea of how much I eat. I started at 250 and now weigh 208, down from a 22 to a 16.

schmenge55

You sounds and look like a beautiful person inside and out! If you want to lose some weight and be in better shape I am 100% confident you can do so. Don't try and do too much too soon.

I'll start with math. You may know this, but I'll start here anyway. If you were to eat 100 calories per day more than you need, which is less than a small bag of chips, you would, over the course of a year gain 10 pounds. The reverse is also true. Eat 100 calories less than you need (which is a total 200 calorie swing) you would lose 10 pounds per year. I am sure 10 pounds sounds like a drop in the bucket, but double or triple the numbers, the math works the same

**It does not take a lot of calories one way or the other to make a difference over time, and time is your friend.**

MFP recommends 1 pound per week which is 500 calories per day. Assuming one was over eating by 100 that is a 600 calorie swing. Add in that most people are looking to stay under their MFP goal, let's say by 200 calories you now have an 800, or more, calorie swing. That is like missing a entire meal!

If you are hungry all the time when you "diet" I would suggest you are not eating enough. You are, in my opinion, better off to take it slow and eat close to you need, but a bit under. Does the weight come off more slowly? Yes it does. But then you should not be hungry all the time either.

You do not need to belong to a gym to exercise. There are all kinds of things you can do at home, or if you like or could like running all you need are shoes. No matter what you do, start small. Something you know you can stick with over time. You can always add more.

If you want to do this thing you CAN do it. I have confidence in you!!!!

Helen_Luvnlife

Reaching out for help is a great first step. I had a hard time doing it but it helps to have a support system..

First I would say if you can't stand eating raw vegetables, don't. Eat the ones you like..Just eat more of them. An easy way to form a meal plan is to devide your plate in fourths. One fourth, fill with vegetables. Another with fruit. Then lean meat and carbs in the other fouths. Try to make your carb as healthy as possible. Avoid sugar and white flour and go with whole grains like brown rice, whole wheat pasta, ect. This is and easy way to start.

Don't skip breakfast. it will stop you from mindless snacking. Then make sure you eat before you get very hungry, about every 4 hours. This does not mean a whole meal. An ounce of raw almonds or a piece of fruit and a cheese stick are great snacks that are easy to take on the run.

Get some exercise. You say you are busy but try to find 10 minutes several times a day. Put some music on in the morning and dance, it will get your body going for the day. If you have to go to the store, park furthest away then walk around the the store. While cooking or clean do calesthenics. Squats while doing dishes. Back kicks while cooking. 5 push ups against the counter when you walk by it.

You can do it. Just take small steps at a time so you dont get overwhelmend. And dont try to lose it all at once. One to Two pounds a week is a healthy loss.

You can add me as a friend if you would like. I would love to watch your progress.

rml_16

No need for a gym membership. I lost 30 pounds never setting foot in a gym. Go for a walk! Get a couple workout videos or find some on YouTube.

If you don't like raw veggies, eat cooked ones. Eat fruit -- smoothies are a great, tasty way to get them in.

Take small steps and work your way toward the body you want.

JenniTheVeggie

Add me. We will support each other. You can do this!

clarkeje1

Some suggestions I have are:

-Try to make exercise a priority. Schedule it just like you would anything else in your busy life. I'm working 60 hours a week right now and schedule workouts 6 days a week. Your health should come before anything else so if there is anything you can eliminate in your life to make time for working out I would definitely do it! The workouts I do are running (I'm training for a 10k) and Jillian Michael's Ripped in 30. You don't need to join a gym and have all kinds of fancy equiptment or $, just get moving!

-Look up different recipes or different foods you can try that are healthy. When I first started I didn't know what to eat but I looked at recipes online and kraft.com helped me get started on cooking healthier meals. Allrecipes is another good one. Planning meals is huge. What I do is look up recipes online, plan my meals and snacks for the week, write out my grocery list and get the groceries and then stick to the meal plan! Another option is if you use Jillian MIchael's DVD she provides you with a free meal plan for 30 days! Planning your meals helps so much, you just have to put the time in.

-Start with baby steps if you have to. One of the biggest things I did when I first started getting healthy was drink water. That simple change lead me to lose 10 pounds in 2 weeks! It was a great jump start for my weight loss and did wonders for my self esteem. It gave me the confidence to keep going. So just try simple changes and once you can stick with those then change something else.

I believe you can do it. Look at all the success stories on here. Get more friends to support you. Try one of the challenges they have in the forums. We are all in this together!!!

kenazfehu

I have a friend on MFP who eats almost all fast food, but she keeps it below her calorie limit and is losing weight. You don't have to eat food vastly different from the food you already eat, you just need to keep track of it and limit your calories.

You also don't need a gym membership. There are a ton of fitness videos on YouTube, and there's walking - one of the best exercises you can do.

Get down to it. All the tools you need are right here. You'll start to feel better about yourself.

CaptChad75

Grettings Xohethr, Lets start with your comment ." I do the low carb, and I end up wanting sweets. I do the low calorie, and I feel like I'm starving at times." I don't know how much you know about food other than calories, fat, protein etc etc so I'll start from square one. When your eating food that is low cal this and low cal that I'm automatically thinking of processed food because there is no such thing as low cal apples and low cal bananas. Start with the ingredients on the package, if it doesnt look like ingredients that you can find in an average kitchen (vanilla, flour,salt etc) then your adding to your struggles. If you see long word this and confusing word that then it's proccessed. Proccessed foods will give you calories yes, and they will also give you energy but only in short bursts. For example if you ate an apple your blood glucose will spike and your body will start to proccess it and but that energy will slowly start to dwindle downward then youd get hungry again. If you were to eat a apple flavored jolly rancher your blood sugar will spike stay there for a while then drop down rapidly. So try to get away from the proccessed food and start with lots of whole foods Natural peanut butters, natural jellies, fruits and veggies as much as you can handle. I personally used lots of veggies and meats for my meals and then only used the fruits as my deserts because when you start this new diet your going to crave what your use too. So if you eat lots of sugar you can't just stop because that has become part of your bodys operating norm and its going to be looking for what I would call False energy. Mix up a bunch of fruits, I used water melon because its super sweet mainly water and after eating lots of meat and steamed veggies I would start cravin sweets then I'd pound all types of melons which some may say is bad but I feel that if I'm going to over indulge on something at least make sure its healthy food that I'm over indulging on. So start with your food in general When you eat the foods that stay in your system longer you do not feel hungry as fast. If you ate apples, then ate the equivilent calories in the form of oreo cookies I can assure you the apples will last longer in your system as a form of energy. If you have this site in the form of an app on your Iphone then look at the diary and there is a little bar code press that and you can start scanning the bar codes on the foods you eat, and I can guarantee that youll start to understand how quickly the foods you eat and drink will add up causing you to over eat. I dropped sodas first thing and bought the individual powder crystal lights, and the Mio drink drops to add to my water for flavor and I started dropping instantly. I'm only dedicated to 2000 calories per day and by the time I would drink my usual 5 dr peppers I was in the hole 1000 calories for the day. Its important to set realistic goals for weight loss. If you started a new regiment of fast walking and dropped your calorie intake you would shed some immediate pounds but don't get use to it because your technically shocking your system and that loss wont continue as your body starts to level out so to speak. When you start noticing your weight to stabilize its time to start something even more intense in order to shock your system again. There are litterally thousands of people on here that can give you what works and what doesn't work but each and every one of them will also atest that what doesn't work 100% of the time is doing nothing at all.

MandaJean83

I'm so sorry you are feeling so down on yourself!!!!

First of all, you CAN do this! Not only can you achieve a size 20, you can well surpass that. You are young and I'm sure have a lot of energy (and will have even more after you drop a couple sizes).

Here are my suggestions:
1) Exercise!! You don't need a gym membership, they ARE expensive. I belong to planet fitness which is only $10 a month, but even that's not necessary. Bundle up in the winter and go for a nice long walk...I'm talking a few miles, or as much as you can handle. And I don't mean a leisurely walk. Bust some butt out there! You can even build up to a jog eventually. C25K is a FREE program that you can do outside, and it helped me to drop my last 10 lbs earlier this year! You can also invest in a few good DVD workouts and a couple sets of hand weights, a set of resistance bands, and a floor mat. With that, you can do everything from aerobics, to simple strength training, to yoga!

2) Be religious about counting cals. Don't cut down to 1200 like some people do. I'm only doing 1200 because I have maybe 5 more lbs to lose. At your current weight, MFP will calculate it for you, but if you set to lose 1 lb per week, you could easily have 1400-1500 a day! Experiment with foods. It doesn't have to be raw veggies! You can have anything you want, in moderation!

3) Have faith in yourself! You can do this!

Feel free to add me, I keep my diary open, and I don't eat raw veggies except once in a very blue moon...

adnol_2

Add me if you would like. I don't like to eat vegetables either. I will eat some once in a while. I am not figuring this as a diet. I am just watching my calories and if I eat more than I should I try to get some exercise in to help me. I have been on MFP for about 110 days now and have only lost 21 lbs, but that is 21 lbs less than I started out with. I have also lost inches, which is good. I get on my stationary bike, or I get on my wii and do some exercises, or I walk a little. I have a hard time walking. There are ways to exercise without spending time and money at the gym. You will also find all kinds of support on MFP. I never would have made it as far as I have without their help.

eyeliner128

I can offer a few tips - I don't have a gym membership either, in fact, I can't do any exercises other than swimming and walking because of a health condition. So, I found a $70 treadmill on craigslist and use that when I can. Walking really passes time if you're listening to music or, as I do, watching stand up comedy on youtube while tread-milling.

Find a good calculator to see what you need to eat, calorie-wise: search "TDEE calculator" or I bet someone has a link that has replied. That's the number of calories you need every day to maintain your current weight, according to how active you are. Aim to eat below that level to start losing weight - MyFitnessPal will calculate all of that when you set up the profile and goals.

I eat whatever kinds of foods I want to eat, as long as I'm under the calorie goal for the day. It might mean that if I eat out at a restaurant for dinner, I can't eat much during the day, but it's all about balancing what you want the day to be like.

3foldchord

Read this link, it is full of good info:

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/654536-in-place-of-a-road-map-2-0-revised-7-2-12

And so many people say it's all about a calorie deficit no matter what foods or how you get to the deficit really. But I have found for me, "only eating less" hardly does anything, but if I have a calorie deficit due to exercise I do better with weight loss.

So, the basics apply to everyone in general, but we all have our own way follow,through that works best.

Log everything you eat. Every thing. Measure. Measure. Log it all!
And read the above linked post.

MandaJean83

Ohh!! I forgot!

#3- Take starting pictures! And starting measurements . For weeks when the scale doesn't cooperate, comparing your current pics and measurements with the starting point is SO motivating!

kos1472

You can do this. It was hard for me at first but I decided I wanted a better life. Last December I was 287 pounds. Now I'm 230 but still a work in progress. Work towards being the person you envision. Here's the good news. You understand this will be difficult but it is not impossible! The even better news is you want something more for your life. You are now just a couple of good decisions paired with consistent action away from changing your life. Feel free to add me.

binkydo123456789

I just have one thing to add to everyones amazing advice----don't look at the big picture, it's easier to look at the small victories such as a 5 lb loss then it is to swallow having to lose 50 lbs. You can do this!

gluestic14

You're not alone! I think it's hard for most people to stay thin, especially with our fast paced lives and all the food at our fingertips. I'm naturally heavier and my weight has always gone up and down but I've finally been able to keep the weight that I want off by using this tool. Counting calories...it can be a massive pain in the butt but it works! I've lost about 34lbs and I've been able to keep it off by never stopping my calorie counting. This tool makes it much easier since it can be on your phone and the scan function is amazing! Just scan the barcode and there's your calories. The hardest part at first is being really really honest with yourself. But after a while it can become second nature. I've been doing this for about a year now and I've found that I can pretty accurately tell the calories in a lot of things. And if I'm not sure - say at a time like Thanksgiving - overestimate!

You can do it!!! Once you get in the swing with the calorie counting you can begin to add exercise. Like a lot of people have already said, you don't need a gym membership. I've got a Fitbit that counts all my steps and it integrates with MFP so it can tell me if I have extra calories to eat that day. It can become part of your everyday routine. Exercise is also one of those things that as you begin to add it your workouts become easier and you add a little more. Before you know it, you may be looking forward to that routine and challenging yourself to go even harder than before!

Slow and steady wins the race with this stuff but let me tell you there's no better feeling than waking up one day and trying on that thing you might have in the closet that's a little too small and seeing that it fits! Also, there's no better feeling than feeling healthy and strong from exercise. Just believe in yourself and don't let little set back cause you to quit completely. If you have a bad day, you can always start fresh the next! Believe in yourself - know you can do it! :-)

lilpoindexter

The best bang for the buck....

Log your daily food intake, and be truthful. You can lock it so only you can look at it, if you feel you want to.

AND

Walk 3/4/5 times a day. 30-60 minutes a pop. I couldn't walk 10 minutes in August 2011, and now I can ride a bike for three hours, and walk an hour without much trouble. You don't have to walk fast, or anything, just walk at a regular pace.

GOOD LUCK!!!! You are on the right path!

Don't get discouraged if you have a bad day. Just concentrate on making the next day better.