Funny Thanksgiving family drama stories

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mramirez1981
mramirez1981 Posts: 134
in Chit-Chat
It seems like my family becomes dysfunctional around the holidays. Any funny stories from Thanksgiving?
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  • Arexxx
    Arexxx Posts: 486 Member
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    Not Thanksgiving, but when I was about 6 my great Aunt stripped naked and washed her clothes in the sink before Christmas dinner.
  • boomboom011
    boomboom011 Posts: 1,459
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    Normally my sister and i have a big blow out anytime we get together however this year I happened to have a pulled muscle or pinched nerve in my neck causing me some serious pain so i took pain medications and went over to her house to eat. it was the best thanksgiving ever! no fighting or anything. as a matter of fact i hugged her when we left.

    Next year Im getting medicated again! it worked out perfect.

    Not sure if you think its funny but we did :)
  • mramirez1981
    mramirez1981 Posts: 134
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    Not Thanksgiving, but when I was about 6 my great Aunt stripped naked and washed her clothes in the sink before Christmas dinner.

    That literally made me LOL! What a memory.
  • mramirez1981
    mramirez1981 Posts: 134
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    Normally my sister and i have a big blow out anytime we get together however this year I happened to have a pulled muscle or pinched nerve in my neck causing me some serious pain so i took pain medications and went over to her house to eat. it was the best thanksgiving ever! no fighting or anything. as a matter of fact i hugged her when we left.

    Next year Im getting medicated again! it worked out perfect.

    Not sure if you think its funny but we did :)

    I love it! Did she know you were medicated?
  • zentha1384
    zentha1384 Posts: 323 Member
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    This isn't funny but it is a huge family drama that has made me very thankful for our smaller thanksgiving dinners since then. About 12 years ago, but it is the reason for my mom's side of the family no longer being invited to our Thanksgiving Dinner anymore.

    We usually have a large family dinner, but my mom wanted to have a huge family dinner, but my dad's side was already planning their own so no one on his side could make it. This honestly ended up being a great thing, but it was still a huge group. My grandma however refused to come if my Aunt Sandy wasn't invited. My mom can't stand her sister for numerous, (*see below for those details). The guest were: My mom's 3 sisters, and her brother, and their families (everyone but Sandy is married), My 2 cousins, and my grandma. Including our little family that is 13 people. My mom made a huge dinner hat was great.

    After most the guest left it was only my Uncle and his wife and son left he asked "Did you give permission for Sandy to take your asthma medication" Turns out he witnessed my aunt take about half a box of her nebulizer solution. Note, my aunt is on welfare and doesn't pay for any of her meds. She has no need to take them. My mom had just gotten her prescriptions filled for her asthma and the pain meds for her back, and as it turns out she pocketed more that just the asthma medicine but half of two other prescripts as well.

    My mom just wanted to let it go but my dad was fuming. So my mom had to call my grandma for my Aunt's number. My grandma refused until she knew why. When the situation was explained it suddenly because my uncle was lying my mom was lying etc. The argument ended with my mom and uncle being "disowned" and she "never wants to see your devil infested family again"

    It take 6 months before my mom and grandma talk again. When my mom tries to make amends my grandma stats yelling. My mom can't even hold the phone up to her ear so my mom puts it on speaker. She said horrible things. after 20 min of her endless ranting i hung up the phone. A month later she called and started another rant and again after her endless rants for 20 min.I had enough, I picked up the phone (I was 16 and I am the quiet shy one, so when I raise my voice everyone listens)

    "Grandma, your are a disrespectful B**** and you are not allowed to call her again until you can treat my family with respect"
    Her voice got all whiny "What did I ever do to you?"
    "You were disrespectful to my mother, and she is part of me, so you disrespected me. We do not need your venomous lies in our life. When you can behave like a normal respectful person we will think about letting you back into our lives" It wasn't until 4 years ago for my wedding that they reconciled, my mom has forgiven her.

    Some of my grandma's choice words:
    "You were so hateful from the time you were born"
    "You are nothing but a w****"
    "You were an abusive little b****. You remember that time you kicked me, you always were a horrible child" (Note the time she was referencing to my mom kicked my grandma ONCE to get my grandma to stop beating her head against the floor and wall)
    "No one loves you, no one could ever love you."
    "You are a lying piece of S***"
    "You are soulless and if you aren't your soul will rot in Hell"

    *My mom saved up for a long time to move out and when she finally got her own place she was so proud and invited her sisters over. It was the first week in her new place, Sandy was the only one who came over. She took a crap in the hot tub, she broke a bottle of alcohol all over the bathroom. She did nothing to clean it up, and my mom ended up getting kicked out without any of her money returned. Every boyfriend (including my dad) my mom brought home my aunt would come down in a see through nightie and flirt with a touch her boyfriends. My grandma will take anything she says at true, including that the devil made her crash her car into a telephone pole.
  • shellebelle87
    shellebelle87 Posts: 291 Member
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    ^^^^

    Your relatives are insane!!! Thats terrible!
  • BlackStarDeceiver
    BlackStarDeceiver Posts: 590 Member
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    it's all fun and games until someone drops a deuce on the table
  • mramirez1981
    mramirez1981 Posts: 134
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    it's all fun and games until someone drops a deuce on the table

    What? LOL! What happened?
  • WifeyCarion
    WifeyCarion Posts: 91
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    Ok, so I have a very attractive family, and one of my cousins is a raging gold digger (I still love her--but man does she have issues!), and she brought her newest fiance over to Thanksgiving dinner...good god he was so weird and creepy, claimed he was a podiatrist, but I seriously wonder if that's really the case. He showed up with a black eye and wearing a suit LOL. My cousin looked immaculate as usual, and bragged about living in a massive new house and shopping for herself this Christmas (using his card). haha, so naturally, my other cousins and I spent Thanksgiving discreetly making fun of them for being super ridiculous :)
  • palmerig88
    palmerig88 Posts: 623 Member
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    My Dad (RIP) missed out on a really fun dinner one Christmas Eve because my Mom refused to make his plate for him. Maybe a bad time to take a stand? Maybe good?

    I don't go to many family functions now but if I visit my Mom's, I can expect to see my step-dad's ex wife at the table.
  • slkehl
    slkehl Posts: 3,801 Member
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    Well, old gramps went on a tirade about Obama being a Marxist and how we all need to buy gold.

    I got locked in the pantry and the lights turned out on me LIKE USUAL even though all my cousins are in their twenties. Some things never change.
  • zentha1384
    zentha1384 Posts: 323 Member
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    ^^^^

    Your relatives are insane!!! Thats terrible!

    Yes, yes they are
  • indygal76
    indygal76 Posts: 283 Member
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    :love: I survived two Thanksgivings with no battle scars! We had fun at both!
  • mllst18
    mllst18 Posts: 188 Member
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    Well, we went to my hubby's side of the family for T-day, and in true French style we played spoons. It tends to get pretty vicious, and my husband flung all the spoons down the table away from me, and I basically did a belly flop and broke the table LOL Embarassing, but at least I'm still the thinnest one out of his side of the family! :laugh:
  • mllst18
    mllst18 Posts: 188 Member
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    Some of my grandma's choice words:
    "You were so hateful from the time you were born"
    "You are nothing but a w****"
    "You were an abusive little b****. You remember that time you kicked me, you always were a horrible child" (Note the time she was referencing to my mom kicked my grandma ONCE to get my grandma to stop beating her head against the floor and wall)
    "No one loves you, no one could ever love you."
    "You are a lying piece of S***"
    "You are soulless and if you aren't your soul will rot in Hell"
    Sounds like some of the things my mother has said to me over the years.....hmmmm
  • boomboom011
    boomboom011 Posts: 1,459
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    Normally my sister and i have a big blow out anytime we get together however this year I happened to have a pulled muscle or pinched nerve in my neck causing me some serious pain so i took pain medications and went over to her house to eat. it was the best thanksgiving ever! no fighting or anything. as a matter of fact i hugged her when we left.

    Next year Im getting medicated again! it worked out perfect.

    Not sure if you think its funny but we did :)

    I love it! Did she know you were medicated?

    Not sure. But im thinking she figured something was up lol
  • Lyssa62
    Lyssa62 Posts: 930 Member
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    there are always brawls at my gatherings..our motto is "it's all fun and games until somebody gets hurt..then it's friggin hilarious" -- that's how we roll
  • AmberJo1984
    AmberJo1984 Posts: 1,067 Member
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    I think all families become dysfunctional during the holidays. However, none of my stories are funny.

    My youngest ucle hates my oldest uncle (on my mom's side). He also seems to hate the rest of us... and would rather scream and throw temper tantrums than spend time with family and make my 84 year old grandmother happy.
  • sunnyside1213
    sunnyside1213 Posts: 1,205 Member
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    My family put the fun in dysFUNctional.
  • mramirez1981
    mramirez1981 Posts: 134
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    Ok, so I have a very attractive family, and one of my cousins is a raging gold digger (I still love her--but man does she have issues!), and she brought her newest fiance over to Thanksgiving dinner...good god he was so weird and creepy, claimed he was a podiatrist, but I seriously wonder if that's really the case. He showed up with a black eye and wearing a suit LOL. My cousin looked immaculate as usual, and bragged about living in a massive new house and shopping for herself this Christmas (using his card). haha, so naturally, my other cousins and I spent Thanksgiving discreetly making fun of them for being super ridiculous :)

    LOL - that's hilarious!!!

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