Lead me to believe. :noway:

cinderelli83

After reading posts for the last two hours, I only feel confused.
You can easily come across valid reasons for every weight loss strategy- which has been pulling me left right and upside down all evening.
I am incredibly determined... but I'd like more structure.
I have been eating well, although a bit under calories with attempting to start hockey again... and working out while on breaks at work (sometimes only 30 minutes of walking- nothing insane).
I'm sure I will see results... but I'd really like to be directed to a magic person or website that I can input all of my information and goals and what not and out spits a meal and exersize plan that WILL WORK. I am pretty good at following a "plan", but I then become discouraged when I'm not seeing an improvement.

I am not looking to drop 60 lbs in a month, or even 10 in a week...
But I'm just frustrated with....

It's healthy to lose X amount of pounds per week.
You need to exersize 5 times a week.
You need to exersize 3 times a week.
TDEE - how do I calculate that??!!
BMR- what I need to be alive but bearly....
BF% - How do I calculate that??
Dont lose muscle!!!
Dont lift too much weight!!
Dont work out when you are sore.
Work out when you are sore, push it baby!!
Tone those arms!
Burn calories!
Eat Calories!
Don't expect results right away.
Don't expect results in 4 months.
Review this formula, it makes sense!
This study here is what really works!
THIS study really works!
Read this book!
Don't buy that!
Eat 10 times a day!
Starve yourself.
You will die if you lose 1/3 of your muscle mass.


I went to University but I feel like an idiot.
What do I believe.
I really need to find that magic web site or person.

What I am hoping to hear though, is what REALLY worked for YOU... what did you put into your mind that kept you focused. What methods did you endure to produce results.

Sorry for all the spelling errors. I'm a mess. LOL

SheilaG1963

You have to find what works for you. You are going to find all kinds of good stuff and bad stuff on here.

I've lost 100 pounds in 2 years. I didn't lift weights, I also didn't eat 10 times a day. That would make me puke! I haven't heard about dying if you lose muscle mass.

Just try logging your food and exercise for a couple of weeks and see if that helps. Eat 3 meals a day, 8 glasses of water and 2 snacks.

Feel free to add me if you want.

SideSteel

What do I believe.

You must create an energy deficit.

There is a short list of things that I would say you should also do, and then there's a LONG list of things that are going to be entirely preferential that will effect how you feel and your adherence but these are not universally applicable to everyone.

Here is what I think are some important things, and I'm going to try and simplify this quite a bit:

1) You should exercise. Ideally some sort of resistance would be beneficial to your body composition. 3 to 5 days/week, whatever you prefer here.
2) You should probably eat a fair amount of nutrient dense foods like fruits and veggies, fish, meats/etc... you can have an occasional pop tart too believe it or not. Just use some common sense here.
3) You should rest.
4) It would be in your best interest to get your macronutrient intake figured out. It's not mandatory for weight loss but it's helpful. Here is one resource:
http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=121703981

Meal timing, number of meals, working out at night or during the day, whether or not you can eat gluten, or whether you should eliminate foods or this or that--- that is all crap that I wouldn't worry about right now.

Eat less than you burn, have some fruit and veggies and a good amount of protein, and work out and sleep.

And win. Do that and you will WIN.


Don't complicate things.

opal24

Absolutely all I did to lose around 60 pounds in 11 months was to enter my stats into MFP, tell them that I wanted to lose 1 pound per week, and eat the number of calories they told me to (I tried to get as close to that number as I could - NOT trying to see how far under I could be!). Because I'm basically completely sedentary (and somewhat lazy), I put myself at the lowest level for exercise - then I logged all my exercise, including short walks and decent stints of house cleaning, and I ate back most of the calories I earned, so I stayed as close to the recommended nett calories as possible. I don't deprive myself of anything I'd like to eat - I just decide whether or not I REALLY want it, and if I do, then I make it fit into my calorie allowance. And the weight has gone off, slowly and steadily......... It's a bit slower now that I'm closer to goal, but I expected that and because I've been eating well for so long it doesn't worry me that it's going to take a bit longer still. This worked for me, and as sheilad1963 says, you need to try things out to see what works for you. Start by logging everything and take it from there. MFP does give you some fantastic tools to work with, so make the most of them. Good luck.

kimberliiw

It's healthy to lose X amount of pounds per week.
You need to exersize 5 times a week.
You need to exersize 3 times a week.
TDEE - how do I calculate that??!!
BMR- what I need to be alive but bearly....
BF% - How do I calculate that??
Dont lose muscle!!!
Dont lift too much weight!!
Dont work out when you are sore.
Work out when you are sore, push it baby!!
Tone those arms!
Burn calories!
Eat Calories!
Don't expect results right away.
Don't expect results in 4 months.
Review this formula, it makes sense!
This study here is what really works!
THIS study really works!
Read this book!
Don't buy that!
Eat 10 times a day!
Starve yourself.
You will die if you lose 1/3 of your muscle mass.

I hate to tell you this but none of those are right, but they're also all right. You'll hear many things here on the board and some of them will be right for you and some won't, it's a matter of finding what works for you. I know that's not what you want to hear, but there's no magic formula. Although I think the formula I use is pretty close. I calculated my TDEE, subtracted 15% and made that my daily goal. I've been losing steadily, 8 pounds in about 11 weeks.

Graelwyn75

Find what works for you, as what works for others might not suit you.
Eat the same times you have always eaten or when you are comfortable eating(for some they just eat when they are hungry but this only works if you actually get hungry often enough to eat enough, lol), but just try and focus more on eating whole foods, and moderating the less healthy foods. Ensure you get plenty of protein to preserve muscle, don't avoid fat like the plague as healthy fats are actually very helpful in weight loss, keeping you fuller, and try and incorporate some exercise, especially strength training/bodyweight exercises 3-6 times a week.

amonkey794

You must create an energy deficit.

There is a short list of things that I would say you should also do, and then there's a LONG list of things that are going to be entirely preferential that will effect how you feel and your adherence but these are not universally applicable to everyone.

Here is what I think are some important things, and I'm going to try and simplify this quite a bit:

1) You should exercise. Ideally some sort of resistance would be beneficial to your body composition. 3 to 5 days/week, whatever you prefer here.
2) You should probably eat a fair amount of nutrient dense foods like fruits and veggies, fish, meats/etc... you can have an occasional pop tart too believe it or not. Just use some common sense here.
3) You should rest.
4) It would be in your best interest to get your macronutrient intake figured out. It's not mandatory for weight loss but it's helpful. Here is one resource:
http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=121703981

Meal timing, number of meals, working out at night or during the day, whether or not you can eat gluten, or whether you should eliminate foods or this or that--- that is all crap that I wouldn't worry about right now.

Eat less than you burn, have some fruit and veggies and a good amount of protein, and work out and sleep.

And win. Do that and you will WIN.


Don't complicate things.

This

amonkey794

Absolutely all I did to lose around 60 pounds in 11 months was to enter my stats into MFP, tell them that I wanted to lose 1 pound per week, and eat the number of calories they told me to (I tried to get as close to that number as I could - NOT trying to see how far under I could be!). Because I'm basically completely sedentary (and somewhat lazy), I put myself at the lowest level for exercise - then I logged all my exercise, including short walks and decent stints of house cleaning, and I ate back most of the calories I earned, so I stayed as close to the recommended nett calories as possible. I don't deprive myself of anything I'd like to eat - I just decide whether or not I REALLY want it, and if I do, then I make it fit into my calorie allowance. And the weight has gone off, slowly and steadily......... It's a bit slower now that I'm closer to goal, but I expected that and because I've been eating well for so long it doesn't worry me that it's going to take a bit longer still. This worked for me, and as sheilad1963 says, you need to try things out to see what works for you. Start by logging everything and take it from there. MFP does give you some fantastic tools to work with, so make the most of them. Good luck.

oooo this is good advice as well

cinderelli83

[/quote]

You must create an energy deficit.

There is a short list of things that I would say you should also do, and then there's a LONG list of things that are going to be entirely preferential that will effect how you feel and your adherence but these are not universally applicable to everyone.

Here is what I think are some important things, and I'm going to try and simplify this quite a bit:

1) You should exercise. Ideally some sort of resistance would be beneficial to your body composition. 3 to 5 days/week, whatever you prefer here.
2) You should probably eat a fair amount of nutrient dense foods like fruits and veggies, fish, meats/etc... you can have an occasional pop tart too believe it or not. Just use some common sense here.
3) You should rest.
4) It would be in your best interest to get your macronutrient intake figured out. It's not mandatory for weight loss but it's helpful. Here is one resource:
http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=121703981

Meal timing, number of meals, working out at night or during the day, whether or not you can eat gluten, or whether you should eliminate foods or this or that--- that is all crap that I wouldn't worry about right now.

Eat less than you burn, have some fruit and veggies and a good amount of protein, and work out and sleep.

And win. Do that and you will WIN.


Don't complicate things.
[/quote]

Thank you for taking the time to write this out! You're right, I really shouldn't over-complicate. After all- there is still LIFE to do! LOL

cinderelli83

It's healthy to lose X amount of pounds per week.
You need to exersize 5 times a week.
You need to exersize 3 times a week.
TDEE - how do I calculate that??!!
BMR- what I need to be alive but bearly....
BF% - How do I calculate that??
Dont lose muscle!!!
Dont lift too much weight!!
Dont work out when you are sore.
Work out when you are sore, push it baby!!
Tone those arms!
Burn calories!
Eat Calories!
Don't expect results right away.
Don't expect results in 4 months.
Review this formula, it makes sense!
This study here is what really works!
THIS study really works!
Read this book!
Don't buy that!
Eat 10 times a day!
Starve yourself.
You will die if you lose 1/3 of your muscle mass.

I hate to tell you this but none of those are right, but they're also all right. You'll hear many things here on the board and some of them will be right for you and some won't, it's a matter of finding what works for you. I know that's not what you want to hear, but there's no magic formula. Although I think the formula I use is pretty close. I calculated my TDEE, subtracted 15% and made that my daily goal. I've been losing steadily, 8 pounds in about 11 weeks.

THANK YOU!

cinderelli83

Absolutely all I did to lose around 60 pounds in 11 months was to enter my stats into MFP, tell them that I wanted to lose 1 pound per week, and eat the number of calories they told me to (I tried to get as close to that number as I could - NOT trying to see how far under I could be!). Because I'm basically completely sedentary (and somewhat lazy), I put myself at the lowest level for exercise - then I logged all my exercise, including short walks and decent stints of house cleaning, and I ate back most of the calories I earned, so I stayed as close to the recommended nett calories as possible. I don't deprive myself of anything I'd like to eat - I just decide whether or not I REALLY want it, and if I do, then I make it fit into my calorie allowance. And the weight has gone off, slowly and steadily......... It's a bit slower now that I'm closer to goal, but I expected that and because I've been eating well for so long it doesn't worry me that it's going to take a bit longer still. This worked for me, and as sheilad1963 says, you need to try things out to see what works for you. Start by logging everything and take it from there. MFP does give you some fantastic tools to work with, so make the most of them. Good luck.

Thank you! I think as stated above- I am just going to not complicate it as much.
Also I should note- Opal is a great name.

vmekash

I'm all about keeping it simple, and cutting out nothing. MFP set my daily goal based on my stats, and I try to net those calories each day.

Bottom Line:
I look at my daily calorie goal as cash in my wallet. It is all the cash I have for the day, unless I work (exercise) to earn more cash. If I have extra cash, I will likely spend most of it by day's end. The next day, I start fresh with my cash allowance reset, and repeat the process.

Details:
Nothing fancy. I don't worry about "eating clean" or about sodium, or carbs or whatever. I TRY to drink around five glasses of water each day. Most of the food I eat is fairly healthy, but I eat junk too. I regularly snack at night. For exercise,while I started off just doing some walking now and again and eventually started using the elliptical for 20 min. or so here and there, buring 100-200 calories (or, more accurately, earning 100-200 calories). Now, I use the elliptical three times a week for about 45 min per session, earning a little more than 400 extra calories on those days. Twice a week, I work out hard using my Total Gym (strength training). All of this has proven effective in terms of losing weight, slimming down, toning and defining muscle. My journey is not over, and frankly, it will not be over once I reach my goal. I will continue my journey for the rest of my life. Feels too good to NOT continue.

Good luck to you.

cinderelli83

Find what works for you, as what works for others might not suit you.
Eat the same times you have always eaten or when you are comfortable eating(for some they just eat when they are hungry but this only works if you actually get hungry often enough to eat enough, lol), but just try and focus more on eating whole foods, and moderating the less healthy foods. Ensure you get plenty of protein to preserve muscle, don't avoid fat like the plague as healthy fats are actually very helpful in weight loss, keeping you fuller, and try and incorporate some exercise, especially strength training/bodyweight exercises 3-6 times a week.

Thanks very much! I think i'm on track for that!!
Really appreciate your post.

jetscreaminagain

::throws confetti:: Yay for an OP that has a question, seeks information, listens to said information, considers it, and is appropriate and thankful in response!

You win MFP, OP!!! Yay!


(I am not in the least bit sarcastic, just so glad to see a thread go well for once--oh, and totally go with SideSteel on this one).

cinderelli83

I'm all about keeping it simple, and cutting out nothing. MFP set my daily goal based on my stats, and I try to net those calories each day.

Bottom Line:
I look at my daily calorie goal as cash in my wallet. It is all the cash I have for the day, unless I work (exercise) to earn more cash. If I have extra cash, I will likely spend most of it by day's end. The next day, I start fresh with my cash allowance reset, and repeat the process.

Details:
Nothing fancy. I don't worry about "eating clean" or about sodium, or carbs or whatever. I TRY to drink around five glasses of water each day. Most of the food I eat is fairly healthy, but I eat junk too. I regularly snack at night. For exercise,while I started off just doing some walking now and again and eventually started using the elliptical for 20 min. or so here and there, buring 100-200 calories (or, more accurately, earning 100-200 calories). Now, I use the elliptical three times a week for about 45 min per session, earning a little more than 400 extra calories on those days. Twice a week, I work out hard using my Total Gym (strength training). All of this has proven effective in terms of losing weight, slimming down, toning and defining muscle. My journey is not over, and frankly, it will not be over once I reach my goal. I will continue my journey for the rest of my life. Feels too good to NOT continue.

Good luck to you.

This sounds fantastic! Congrats!
It really is a great way to think about calories. Like currency.

cinderelli83

::throws confetti:: Yay for an OP that has a question, seeks information, listens to said information, considers it, and is appropriate and thankful in response!

You win MFP, OP!!! Yay!


(I am not in the least bit sarcastic, just so glad to see a thread go well for once--oh, and totally go with SideSteel on this one).

**Picks confetti out of hair***
THANKS! (What is an OP?)
I figure, people on here that have had success could truthfully just abandon all responsibility to support this community. Instead I have people on this message board bothering to type out suggestions and successes to help guide me. How can I not appreciate that!? Even people from New Zeland! Even if you eliminate the content, this support is truly motivational.
THANKS!

spectralmoon

... I just decide whether or not I REALLY want it, and if I do, then I make it fit into my calorie allowance. And the weight has gone off, slowly and steadily........

For me, and for a few others on my list it seems, THIS is what makes the difference. When you feel that you are "suffering" with that cake taunting you from the kitchen or that burger wrecking your day from lunch on, it's how much you want it that gets you to move just a liiiiiiiittle bit more to make it work. And it does work.

Railr0aderTony

Opps, I need to be more attentive to what i comment on. My apologies.

momxs2

makes perfect sense...

Sarauk2sf

1) Eat mostly nutritious foods (except this weekend ) at a reasonable (ie 1lb or less) deficit
2) Hit my macros (1g of protein per lb of LBM, 0.35g fat per total body weight as a minimum)
3) Strength train
4) Take a diet break every couple of months
5) Try to get enough sleep
6) Be as accurate in my weighting/measuring/logging as possible
7) Eat ice-cream every day

Sarauk2sf

I am not looking to drop 60 lbs in a month, or even 10 in a week...

^^^^ Unrealistic, did you gain 60lbs in a month? or even 10 in a week? No, It takes time.

She said she is NOT looking to do that.

MariaMariaM

I think I got confused by just reading your post.

Yes, there is too much information here and a lot of it is wrong. You want to create a calorie deficit, not more than 20% IMO with 15% been ideal (Again my opinion). After all, once you reach your goal you want to maintain it.
BMR is the lowest you need to live while TDEE is what you need to maintain your weight at your current activity level (including exercise). You can estimate them by using some online calculators. Just keep in mind that everything is an estimate and not accurate to the last calorie. Here are some websites you can use to estimate. I usually use 3 and do an avg.
FAT2FITRADIO.COM
FITNESSFROG.ORG
scoobysworkshop.com

As long as you eat between BRM and TDEE you will lose weight. Obviously the less you eat, the less energy you might have. You need to play with your calories to see what is comfortable to you.

One more thing, quality of food is important IMO as well as macros. Eat at least 1gr of protein for every pound of weight. My macros are set to 35% carbs, 40% protein, 25% fat.

About lifting, I do lifting and lift heavy for me. I like it and it has done good things to my body, Before that I did p90x and it gave me excellent results. I also eat to fuel my body and for pleasure when it calls for that. It is all about balance.

cubsgirlinny

*

Wendysworld13

Your first step has been asking the questions. The second is looking carefully at the answers that are positive and motivating and try the pieces you can use for your life.
I am extremely impressed by the responses you have received - well thought out and all trying to help.
You have the opportunity to try different things because this is a lifestyle change, not a diet and what works for you might not work for the next person. If something works in your life, keep at it - if it doesn't now try something else - just don't quit too early - give it time. This is your life. Live it!
Good luck to you on your journey!

WendyTerry420

What do I believe.

You must create an energy deficit.

There is a short list of things that I would say you should also do, and then there's a LONG list of things that are going to be entirely preferential that will effect how you feel and your adherence but these are not universally applicable to everyone.

Here is what I think are some important things, and I'm going to try and simplify this quite a bit:

1) You should exercise. Ideally some sort of resistance would be beneficial to your body composition. 3 to 5 days/week, whatever you prefer here.
2) You should probably eat a fair amount of nutrient dense foods like fruits and veggies, fish, meats/etc... you can have an occasional pop tart too believe it or not. Just use some common sense here.
3) You should rest.
4) It would be in your best interest to get your macronutrient intake figured out. It's not mandatory for weight loss but it's helpful. Here is one resource:
http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=121703981

Meal timing, number of meals, working out at night or during the day, whether or not you can eat gluten, or whether you should eliminate foods or this or that--- that is all crap that I wouldn't worry about right now.

Eat less than you burn, have some fruit and veggies and a good amount of protein, and work out and sleep.

And win. Do that and you will WIN.


Don't complicate things.

^^^^

One thing I did was notice THIS guy's posts early on, along with HelloItsDan's "In Place of a Road Map."

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/654536-in-place-of-a-road-map-2-0-revised-7-2-12

^^ The road map thread is a ton of great info on figuring out your TDEE.

I found my "energy sweet spot" between 1700-1800 calories, and follow SideSteel's advice about keeping it simple. Basically, I am about 100 calories above my BMR and stay about 200-400 calories below my TDEE. I try to exercise regularly (cardio *and* strength training), to remember to eat my vegetables and get enough protein, to get enough sleep and to stay hydrated. I don't freak out or let myself stress over the little things. For the most part, I don't get hungry except at meal times, and physically I feel better than I have since I was a teenager. I've been doing this since July 5, losing 2 pounds a week, and have lowered my body fat by more than 12%. It really is pretty simple. The hard part is the discipline and patience.

pastryari

1) Eat mostly nutritious foods (except this weekend ) at a reasonable (ie 1lb or less) deficit
2) Hit my macros (1g of protein per lb of LBM, 0.35g fat per total body weight as a minimum)
3) Strength train
4) Take a diet break every couple of months
5) Try to get enough sleep
6) Be as accurate in my weighting/measuring/logging as possible
7) Eat ice-cream every day

hannibal28

I will tell you what I did, I was obese, diagnosed with sleep apnea and had no energy. i started out by walking until i got a little more energy and lost some weight. i then started jogging and when i got tired I walked. i increased my didstance on a weekly basis. After i had gained more energy and started sleeping better, i started lifting weights 6 days a week and incorporated twice weekly spinning classes, this was low resistance on legs but burned a lot of calories. 9 months later I am getting ready to do my first 1/2 marathon. biggest advice no excuses gotta get started and saty with it. almost forgot log everything you eat and set your profile for desired weekly loss. Their are no magic pills just exercise and eating properly.

CrazyCatLadylovescats

Yup, you are right. Ask a question here and you will get a million answers, none the same.

Here is what is working for me: Primal Blueprint (get the book from the library if you want to read it.) It is a combination of what to eat, exercise suggestions, sleep recommendations, getting enough sun and lowering stress levels. When I read the book, which included eliminating grains, I felt this made sense to me based on how I lost baby weight years ago - I hate being hungry, so I didn't eat a lot of carbs, and ate almost as much as I wanted of vegetables. I did lose 10lbs right away this summer...but it was starting to creep back up, so I came here to count calories. I am not following the lifestyle totally - I need to exercise more, but I have a hard time with that, so cutting calories is my substitute. If I was exercising, perhaps I wouldn't need to count calories. I hope to fit that in soon, but we will see if I can make the time.

Basically, read different options, and see what makes sense to you. If it doesn't work, try something else. If it does work for you, consider it a lifestyle change and stick with it.

cinderelli83

I think I got confused by just reading your post.

Yes, there is too much information here and a lot of it is wrong. You want to create a calorie deficit, not more than 20% IMO with 15% been ideal (Again my opinion). After all, once you reach your goal you want to maintain it.
BMR is the lowest you need to live while TDEE is what you need to maintain your weight at your current activity level (including exercise). You can estimate them by using some online calculators. Just keep in mind that everything is an estimate and not accurate to the last calorie. Here are some websites you can use to estimate. I usually use 3 and do an avg.
FAT2FITRADIO.COM
FITNESSFROG.ORG
scoobysworkshop.com

As long as you eat between BRM and TDEE you will lose weight. Obviously the less you eat, the less energy you might have. You need to play with your calories to see what is comfortable to you.

One more thing, quality of food is important IMO as well as macros. Eat at least 1gr of protein for every pound of weight. My macros are set to 35% carbs, 40% protein, 25% fat.

About lifting, I do lifting and lift heavy for me. I like it and it has done good things to my body, Before that I did p90x and it gave me excellent results. I also eat to fuel my body and for pleasure when it calls for that. It is all about balance.

Thanks very much for this information!!!

cinderelli83

Thanks EVERYONE for the great strategies.
The main message I picked up was this:

- STAY focused by TRACKING results, calories and exersize
- Do what FEELS right for ME, and pay attention to what's going on.
- STAY connected with this wonderful community.
- Take the PRESSURE off by SIMPLIFYING.
- Calories are currency. Aim for the target, or work for more.

Thank you everyone.

dvisser1

After reading posts for the last two hours, I only feel confused.
You can easily come across valid reasons for every weight loss strategy- which has been pulling me left right and upside down all evening.
I am incredibly determined... but I'd like more structure.
I have been eating well, although a bit under calories with attempting to start hockey again... and working out while on breaks at work (sometimes only 30 minutes of walking- nothing insane).
I'm sure I will see results... but I'd really like to be directed to a magic person or website that I can input all of my information and goals and what not and out spits a meal and exersize plan that WILL WORK. I am pretty good at following a "plan", but I then become discouraged when I'm not seeing an improvement.

I am not looking to drop 60 lbs in a month, or even 10 in a week...
But I'm just frustrated with....

It's healthy to lose X amount of pounds per week.
You need to exersize 5 times a week.
You need to exersize 3 times a week.
TDEE - how do I calculate that??!!
BMR- what I need to be alive but bearly....
BF% - How do I calculate that??
Dont lose muscle!!!
Dont lift too much weight!!
Dont work out when you are sore.
Work out when you are sore, push it baby!!
Tone those arms!
Burn calories!
Eat Calories!
Don't expect results right away.
Don't expect results in 4 months.
Review this formula, it makes sense!
This study here is what really works!
THIS study really works!
Read this book!
Don't buy that!
Eat 10 times a day!
Starve yourself.
You will die if you lose 1/3 of your muscle mass.


I went to University but I feel like an idiot.
What do I believe.
I really need to find that magic web site or person.

What I am hoping to hear though, is what REALLY worked for YOU... what did you put into your mind that kept you focused. What methods did you endure to produce results.

Sorry for all the spelling errors. I'm a mess. LOL

Both the beauty and ultimate frustration about weight loss and getting healthy is that there is no set formula, no special sauce, no magical unicorn dust. Different approaches work for different people for any of a variety of reasons.

Personally I like that this website does a lot of the work for me, but leaves the meal planning up to me. Some people might like being given meal plans for each day, but I would not be able to follow something like that. As I said, different approaches for different people.

TDEE = Total daily energy expenditure....or how many calories you burn in a given day. TDEE = BMR * Activity Level + exercise. This is where MFP or other websites (fat2fitradio.com is a personal favorite) are helpful. You input your vital stats so the website can calculate a relatively accurate approximation of your BMR. You input your activity level, and I always suggest people set a level that does not include exercise. Basically if you don't go to the gym or do that lunchtime power walk, what is your activity level like? Each activity level converts into a numerical factor. Sedentary is about 1.2, Lightly Active is around 1.35, etc. Those are built into the website. So the website does that hard work for you. Exercise, MFP has a large database of exercises to estimate calories burned. Some are relatively accurate, some are not. A heart rate monitor that calculates calories burned is really the most accurate.

How many times a day to eat? Again, that goes back to personal preference. I eat 3 meals with 1-2 mostly unplanned snacks each day. I met a guy who ate only once a day, but packed away over 2500 calories in that one meal. Some people eat a bunch of little snack sized meals each day. I've heard that eating many times a day can help reduce insulin spikes, but as you know you can find opinions and studies that support any and all sides of that. What it comes down to is if you are comfortable eating two, three or ten meals a day, you can make this work for you. More meals simply means smaller volume at each one.

It's easy to over think this. There is a lot of trial and error in finding what works for you. Eat less than what you burn over a period of time and you will lose weight. How you go about eating and accounting for those calories is up to you.