how to motivate someone else to start

twinketta

This is an ideal time coming up to Christmas, to give him an Xmas challenge!!

If you don`t want to make it about him, personally I wouldn`t cos he seems like he is on the defensive...then make it about yourself?

Ask him for help with you...does he live near you? Suggest that you need someone to spot you at the gym and you would appreciate his help?

You would like to try kick boxing/ tae bo/ whatever....but you would like some company cos you feel silly going on your own?

Your girlfriend/wife is not supporting you with the foods you eat...can he help you.

What I am trying to say is make him involved to make some decisions and offer his help...maybe he feels like he is being pushed into something that he wants but doesn`t want to be pushed into?

I am sure he will get there if he wants to

likemeinvisible

What's a better way to be accountable than to be on MFP and see that big number go red with a minus next to it. I feel bad when I see it and I need to gain !

kellicci

It's really his choice but I find that sharing my fun NSVs with people makes them want to join me in living healthy. Not just the pounds I lost but....other NSVs like the definitionin my biceps and abs....I'm sleeping better...My skin has never been this healthy....running is so much easier now that I've lost a few pounds and it's kinda fun. Honestly when I told my parents some of those I saw the thoguht cross their mind..."hmm I should try that." and sure enough they are eating healthier now. Try planing little seeds and be patient.

djames92

you see hes been saying i want to do this for months now ever since i lost my weight hes been talking about doing it himself and how he wants me to hold him accountable but its hard to do that when i live 3 hours away from him

hate to say it, but I think the only way you can help him is to tell him straight up - the next time he says that about wanting you to hold him accountable, you need to let him know that is BS and HE needs to hold HIMSELF accountable.

That statement leads me to believe he is just shifting the blame to someone else when all the blame belongs on his own shoulders. By saying he wants you to hold him accountable (knowing that it isn't physically possible - even if you lived WITH him) it gives him the excuse that it isn't his fault because "you aren't doing your part".

There is nothing you can do to make him do it other than lead by example and be supportive, but I wouldn't put up with him trying to blame you for his choices - that should stop. abruptly.

i like that i think ill try that next time i see him

Qskim

you see hes been saying i want to do this for months now ever since i lost my weight hes been talking about doing it himself and how he wants me to hold him accountable but its hard to do that when i live 3 hours away from him

hate to say it, but I think the only way you can help him is to tell him straight up - the next time he says that about wanting you to hold him accountable, you need to let him know that is BS and HE needs to hold HIMSELF accountable.

That statement leads me to believe he is just shifting the blame to someone else when all the blame belongs on his own shoulders. By saying he wants you to hold him accountable (knowing that it isn't physically possible - even if you lived WITH him) it gives him
the excuse that it isn't his fault because "you aren't doing your part".
There is nothing you can do to make him do it other than lead by example and be supportive, but I wouldn't put up with him trying
to blame you for his choices - that should stop. abruptly.

i like that i think ill try that next time i see him

I did this with a friend cos I got frustrated. I was queen of excuses myself so I saw excuses to not just do it in everything she said. She was blaming others just like I used to. So I was abrupt with her one day when she was feeling sorry for herself and it has changed our relationship. I should have just stuck with being the fun friend instead of being someone who came across to her as judgmental...I was doing the tough love bit but it hurt her deeply and she has given up completely now. I'm not totally to blame for this but it didn't help. She didn't need me to confirm what she already knew deep down, she just needed unconditional love.