Why do I always seem to fail :(

elis1985

Just thought I would throw this out there and see if anyone had any tips. I'm that kinda person who will always say, "I'll start my diet tomorrow" and "tomorrow" never comes! A few times I have started one, I always go for the unhealthy stuff I want to lose a stone and a half.

Have any of you guys found going for the healthy food options hard or a struggle and how did you train yourself to stick to your diet?

Thanks

llevatela

The answer is simple. If you are dieting, that implies that at one point you will stop. Instead, you should make the decision to make a life change. Tell yourself, I am no longer eating unhealthy foods. You can make small changes in your meal plan that can help you shed pounds. I don't know what you eat, but simple swaps can go a long way. Whole wheat products instead of their traditional counterparts is a step in the right direction. You should put a plan in place and refuse to eat at unhealthy places. Anytime I am going out to eat with friends, I scout the place out and know what I am getting before I even leave my house. For me, the key is planning. If you can't help yourself and enjoy fast food, I reccomend picking up the "Eat This, Not That" book. It will help you shed calories even when eating at less desireable locations. I hope I helped and good luck!

ubermensch13

The answer is simple. If you are dieting, that implies that at one point you will stop. Instead, you should make the decision to make a life change. Tell yourself, I am no longer eating unhealthy foods. You can make small changes in your meal plan that can help you shed pounds. I don't know what you eat, but simple swaps can go a long way. Whole wheat products instead of their traditional counterparts is a step in the right direction. You should put a plan in place and refuse to eat at unhealthy places. Anytime I am going out to eat with friends, I scout the place out and know what I am getting before I even leave my house. For me, the key is planning. If you can't help yourself and enjoy fast food, I reccomend picking up the "Eat This, Not That" book. It will help you shed calories even when eating at less desireable locations. I hope I helped and good luck!

The only major changes I've made is my commitment to a work out routine and to log my calories. I still eat the same stuff, go out to eat once a week and enjoy food, I just eat less of it(however, recently i"ve upped my calories to almost Maint level because I'm pretty much done losing now, and trying to add strength). There are only 2 secrets to success on this journey: 1. Commitment to what you start 2. Looking long term.

mfpcopine

I just posted a self-help article and link on how to change habits. It might be interesting to you. Most people are too ambitious. They also don't realize that they will fail; the key is how to deal with the failure and resume.

To change even a trivial habit is hard, much less the way you eat and move.

gxm17

Start your diet while grocery shopping. Just don't buy those chips, buy healthy food so that's what you have around the house when you get the urge to snack. Healthy food doesn't have to be boring, search the MFP recipe board and elsewhere online to find recipe ideas that appeal to you. Buy those ingredients so that you have them on hand when you need to quench a craving.

What are your goals and how are you going to get there? Write it all down. Keep a fitness diary. And make exercise time a priority that can't be pushed to another day. Find something you enjoy doing, whether that's walking, running, dancing, kickboxing, lifting weights, pilates or yoga. If you enjoy an activity, then there's no dread factor, there's only the fun factor and you'll want to make time for it.

Do you comfort eat? If so, substitute exercise for food. Feeling down? Exercise, even if it's just a walk around the block. If you're still hungry afterwards, you've earned a nice little snack.

Don't "go on a diet," make a lifestyle change. This is the new you. This is the way you will eat for the rest of your life. It's an exciting journey and a little scary at first, but sooner than you think, the idea of junks foods will have lost all its appeal.

Lastly, don't beat yourself up over setbacks. Everyone has them. We're only human. Just don't let your setbacks define you, let your successes define you. Be stubborn, know that every day is a new day and just get back on that horse every time you fall off.

Good luck!

mrsfincham

AS all the guys above have said .... LIFESTYLE change . i have changed my mindset totally from believing i was going to fail before i even had a go to DOING it .
i eat healthy and make healthy choices . doesnt meant that every now and again i slip WE are only human but then its that choice again to eat healthy .

Dont be so hard on yourself , it can take a few goes before you finally click it one day and the light bulb goes on so to speak . it did for me and i am loving all the healthy food and exercise .

good luck hun and i am sure you will do very well ...

AmyRhubarb

Realistic goals,, baby steps, and one day at a time. I've tried and failed in the past, stopped and started several times over. It's been a process and a journey, but like the others have said, it's got to be a commitment to a lifestyle change, not a temporary diet.

Today marks my 460th straight day of logging into MFP, but I've been a member longer than that, and used other sites prior to finding MFP. In that time, my food diary has changed as far as how much I eat, and what foods I eat on a regular basis. Just logging everything I was eating was very eye-opening and helpful in getting me to start making changes. I'd see how I could cut something out or make a better choice for more protein, or less sodium, or drop something that was super high in calories in favor of something that was better for me that I could enjoy more of it!

I started making the habit of putting my workout clothes out the night before, so I could change into them first thing without the excuse of not going back into the bedroom and waking up my husband. Decide what workout you want to do as well, and if it's a DVD, load it the night before, have the exercise mat, dumbbells, or whatever you need all ready to go. I kept at it until it became habit, part of what I do.

And if you have a day where you miss a workout, or go over on calories, don't give up or beat yourself up over it - it happens, it's one day, and won't destroy any progress you've made. Resolve to stay on track the next day and keep going. That's part of it being my lifestyle now - life happens, unexpected meals out at restaurants, birthday parties, holidays, whatever. They don't derail me, I work them into my day, drink plenty of water, and keep going.

YOU CAN DO IT! :bigsmile:

wibutterflymagic

It's all in your head. If you are starting out thinking you can't do it and can't not eat the crap, then that is what is going to happen. It's taken me a long time to get my head around straight to tell myself I'm going to do this and make the "lifestyle" change to get on the road to a better me. It's not a diet where you are telling yourself not to eat this or that. It's a lifestyle change based on portion control and better choices. You can still have so called "bad" stuff but in moderation and not everyday. Tonight I'm having pizza and maybe a piece of garlic cheese bread but it all fits into my set of goals.

For me it hasn't been that hard. I'm not craving fast food or the sweets. I wasn't that big of a fast food person(comparatively speaking) but LOVE my sweets. There are lots of meals you can have that will fill you up and not make you crave the junk. I've only changed over the last 21 days and when I get extra calories from working out I think---ya, I'll have something really bad for me, but in the end I don't. I'm not craving it so I don't eat it and I don't want to give back the progress I've made.

Until you truly make up your mind to change, it won't happen.

sarahrbraun

Just thought I would throw this out there and see if anyone had any tips. I'm that kinda person who will always say, "I'll start my diet tomorrow" and "tomorrow" never comes! A few times I have started one, I always go for the unhealthy stuff I want to lose a stone and a half.

Have any of you guys found going for the healthy food options hard or a struggle and how did you train yourself to stick to your diet?

Thanks

I made a deal with myself when I started eating lowER carb. I would give it two weeks, then if it didn't make a difference on the scale, I could go back to my previous way of eating. That was in May...and without more than a handful of exceptions ( like a friend's BBQ and a church social...) I have stuck to it. Even through the last 3 months of almost no weight loss. I actually feel better when I eat lower carb. Yesterday I went to lunch with hubby, and I ate a sub--including the bun--within an hour or so I was ill. For lunch today, all I had to do was take the top bun off my burger--I was full and gave my kids my fries.

mmddwechanged

What has helped me tremendously is recording what I eat accurately for the last six months.
Looking back I can see that when I eat over 2000 calories a day most of the time over a four week period I weigh more. Less than 1700 pretty consistently over time I weigh less. I needed to see it for myself. Now I feel pretty confident that I am losing. Yesterday I had more than 2500. Today and tomorrow , if I eat less than 1600 I'll be a ok and even Steven! So even yesterday ( with my deep fried sushi and pepperoni pizza). I was on a "diet". Or continuing to hav a calorie deficit week by week. I don't have much to lose so the scale has just been going up and down for the last few weeks. Am I worried when I see a five pound jump? No, because I know this works, it's my diary that really shows how I'm doing us I know that I'm losing , even if it is only .1 of a pound per week. I will get there.

meshashesha2012

There are only 2 secrets to success on this journey: 1. Commitment to what you start 2. Looking long term.

this is how i see it as well.

it took me 20 years of committed effort to gain weight and get obese, so it's not going to take 6 months for me to fix those bad habits and lose the weight. i'm approaching my 1 year mark of being committed to losing weight and although i might not have much to show for it in terms of how far my lil lady on the ticker has moved, i have lost 5 sizes, my high blood pressure is gone, i'm no longer on the prediabetes train plus i've made a bunch of new healthy lifestyle changes that were a PITA the first few months but are now pretty much second nature.

my advice is to not look at this as a race. it's very tempting to want to do everything as soon as possible, but remember the story of the tortoise and the hare. in certain things it's best to be the tortoise if you want your changes to be effective in the long terms

meggonkgonk

Plan. Plan. And then. Plan a bit more.

Plan what you will eat. Only diverge from it if you have a good reason for doing so.

Plan your workouts - even if it's just a 10 minute walk.

Don't beat yourself up for imperfection. If you miss something, start over again the next minute. Not the next day.

Don't be afraid to start small and build up. Start your work out with short walks. Build them up. Try running or swimming or cardio machines. Start revising your food with dinner. Then breakfast. Then lunch. Start with measuring portions. THEN start by cutting them down. Start by ADDING fruits and veggies. THEN start ommitting extraneous foods like junky snacks, or extra bread/grain servings or soda.

Set an achievable goal for every step. Get 3 veggies a day every day for a week. Walk every day for a week. Go 3 meals without something you know is bad for you. Try some kind of sandwich without cheese or sauce.

Eat healthy, but don't stress about slashing your cals. Bring them down slowly and be controlled about it. Enjoy the food you eat. Eat food you truly enjoy.

Chillax. Plan ahead, be prepared.

Derpes

Try keeping a food diary for a week. Next, rank the top five foods or types of food that you eat most often.

If they are not healthy, attempt to substitute them with healthier alternatives.

For example, if you like bacon, substitute turkey bacon.

This will at least provide a starting point to build on without depriving yourself. Deprivation is unsustainable.

beachlover317

You have to really want it. Really. Not because someone else wants it. Because YOU want it. When your head is there - you will succeed - in spite of every obstacle that is thrown in your path. You will make it happen. Until then, you're not going to do it. I know and so does everyone else who is doing it now. We've all been there. Good luck.

krazy4choc

I would say not to look too far into the future. A wise person once said to me, "do what works for today". Take it a day at a time. Try to control what you eat today maybe by planning in the morning what you will eat that day. We don't know what tomorrow will bring so do your best today!
Also, try having cut up vegetables like carrots and celery on hand in your refrigerator. It's much easier to eat those if they are already cut up.
Maybe drink 8 ounces of water every hour on the hour to get your water quota done.
Remember you are doing something loving for yourself! When I go to a yoga class my mantra for that class is to love myself.
Good luck!!

vanguardfitness

You can start by dropping processed foods

ACrowsDay

You have to want it really, really, really bad!!!

kr1stadee

I'm going to give you my experiences. If it offends you, I apologize, it's not my intent. I do wish someone said this to me every time I decided on a new fad, started counting calories, or joined a gym. Maybe you just aren't ready.

I've been trying to lose weight for about 10 years. After I started dating my now husband, I went from 150 to 180. A couple of years in, I got pregnant with my son at 180 (gained 50lbs none the less). Had him, went back to 180, but never any lower. Slowly it crept to 190, then 200. I dieted, cut out food groups, looked into South Beach, did Slim Fast, pretty much every weight loss plan you can imagine. Sparkpeople, I've reset my account there more times than I had logged!

Then I started working at LA Weight Loss (hello money grab!!), and followed their plan. Got as low as 184, no lower. Got married then, and on our honeymoon, I found out I was pregnant. I got up to 230lbs. Had her, then went back to 200.. then over the last 3 years, I ballooned up to 220, again, trying and trying to lose weight. Wasted much money at the gym- I was good for the first month, dropped 10lbs, gave myself a cheat night on Friday, then it turned into Saturday, Sunday, then I gave up completely. Repeat that about 4 times over the course of a year.

This past summer, it was HOT. I was HOT. I had no shorts that I was comfortable in, I hated everything in my closet. My husband said "well, go shopping!" Nothing was scarier than those words. I was NOT about to go and see what I could squeeze into.. been there, done that, left the mall crying. I couldn't do it.

At the very end (last day or 2) of August of this year, I found this website, and for some reason, I have no idea, it's working. I'm sticking to it. I'm losing weight!! I didn't have to research the latest fad, I didn't have to give up everything I love to eat and turn into a bunny rabbit. I just do it in moderation!!

I think I was just ready. I'm sure the need and the intention is there, but if you find yourself sticking to it, and then giving up, maybe you just aren't ready yet.

Whatever the issue, I hope it gets sorted out and you find something you can work with!! Good luck!

JesterMFP

Stop being "that kinda person who will always say, "I'll start my diet tomorrow"". You don't want to be that person? Simple. Stop saying that. Start saying "I'm starting now".

Also, as others have said, stop looking at it as a temporary "diet" that you're going on until you have lost the weight, and will then go back to normal. Make a permanent lifestyle change, so that when you reach your goal (and if you choose to, you will) you just carry on in the same way, confident that you will keep the weight off for life.

I think a lot of people believe that in order to lose weight they have to be terribly restrictive, cut out all "fattening" foods and exist off skinless chicken breast and steamed vegetables. You don't. Now, I'm not advocating paying no attention to nutrition at all, far from it. I just think that there's little point in making such radical overnight changes that you can only sustain for a few weeks before you fall off the wagon again.

What I suggest is that you start by setting MFP to lose 0.5 lb a week. You don't have much to lose, so a smaller calorie deficit is more appropriate, and easier to stick to. Then, log what you eat (if you're not already doing this consistently). Eat what you like, log it, and see how it adds up. If you are over your calorie goal, then make tweaks to your diet until you reach your goal. I have no idea what kind of stuff you eat, but it could mean swapping out a 250 calorie chocolate bar for something smaller that is only 100 calories. It might mean having 2 slices of bread instead of 4. It might mean slightly reducing the amount of pasta or rice you're eating. You might decide to cut back on the more calorific items in order to save calories, or have them only once or twice a week.

Once you are used to eating the right portions to reach your calorie goal, and you don't feel too deprived because you're still eating all the foods you like, then you can look at other aspects of what you're eating. Work out what's important to you. If you read these boards, you'll get vastly different ideas of what constitutes a "healthy diet", but you need to decide what your priorities are. If you want to cut down on sugar, or increase protein, or focus on how much calcium you're getting, well you can do that, and make further changes to your diet. Don't try to change everything all at once, but you'll probably find that over time, you are drawn to more nutritious foods anyway.

The same goes with exercise. Start out gently, if you're not used to exercise. Go for a walk, or swimming. Find an activity that you really enjoy, and that will keep you motivated. If it's something that allows you to learn new skills (like dancing or a martial art) or allows you to set goals (running or weight lifting) then that will keep you motivated too.

Losing weight is hard, but be careful not to make it harder than it needs to be. It doesn't have to be torture. Create a lifestyle that you can live with, permanently. Beyond that, you just have to decide how much you want it, and then commit to it.

DavPul

Three things that helped me.

1. Don't put so much pressure on yourself about food choices. Eat things you like in moderation. Control portion sizes more than anything else. I've lost all my weight eating pizzas and McDonalds with a few minor changes. I'm an extreme example, but that point remains. Too many people stress over "the right foods" and quit altogether. Find some middle ground that works for you. There's no magical food; just the right amount of calories from whatever you choose to eat.

2. Stop thinking about the past. The title of your post is too concerned about what happened the last few times you tried. I don't care what happened last time. I don't care what happened yesterday. There was no yesterday. Only worry about what you're going to do today. And today you're going to succeed, because you have a plan for success. Doesn't matter that you quit last time, doesn't matter that you pigged out yesterday, doesn't matter that you skipped a week of workouts. Talk to me about what we're getting done today.

3. Stop talking about tomorrow. Too many people have plans that are going to start on some magical turn of the calendar's page. Sure, have a plan for tomorrow. Hell, I have my workouts and food planned for the next several weeks. But I don't talk about it. Only thing I'm talking about is what I'm doing today. And even then I'm not talking about it. I'm just lacing my shoes up and hitting the door.

If you manage your todays then your tommorrows will take care of themselves and your yesterdays won't matter.