sabotage at christmas - just me?

katcunock

the amount of people trying to sabotage you around christmas is mental. It's literally the 2nd, and people are already telling me to 'treat myself, it's christmas'.

No. I don't want to go to that all you can eat buffet with you, i don't see why my social interactions have to focus on food.

People's reactions? not favourable.

I indulge, I workout, but I don't go overboard. What is so wrong with that???

How do you cope with the sabotage?Am I the only one experiencing this?

pixietoes

I don't see it as sabotage. My decisions about what I put in my mouth aren't any one else's problems. What they choose to eat isn't my problem, either.

I get that meals are a lovely way to socialize with friends. I get that a lot of holiday celebrating happens with food in the room. I eat before I go to either. I have been to restaurants and ordered tea at a buffet place, or sometimes a salad or possibly a vegetable side dish with no butter. Everyone I'm with knows what I'm doing and my friends are supportive and want me to hang out with them and don't care what I order. There have been people who find it odd and that's fine with me. I can tell you it's never the servers in restaurants. They've seen people with odd food needs before.

A few weeks ago I was at an art opening with some friends, it was a wine and beer evening with lots of hors d'oerves. I ate dinner before I went, drank water while I was there and I had a great time. It was even more great the next morning when I got on the scale.

You can do this.

lacroyx

When people try to offer me treats, I give them one of these

followed by lifting up my shirt and doing one of these

they laugh and leave me alone. but sometimes they insist and when they do I say diabetes and they drop it. I had type II nearly 3 years ago and don't anymore.

katcunock

I don't see it as sabotage. My decisions about what I put in my mouth aren't any one else's problems. What they choose to eat isn't my problem, either.

I get that meals are a lovely way to socialize with friends. I get that a lot of holiday celebrating happens with food in the room. I eat before I go to either. I have been to restaurants and ordered tea at a buffet place, or sometimes a salad or possibly a vegetable side dish with no butter. Everyone I'm with knows what I'm doing and my friends are supportive and want me to hang out with them and don't care what I order. There have been people who find it odd and that's fine with me. I can tell you it's never the servers in restaurants. They've seen people with odd food needs before.

A few weeks ago I was at an art opening with some friends, it was a wine and beer evening with lots of hors d'oerves. I ate dinner before I went, drank water while I was there and I had a great time. It was even more great the next morning when I got on the scale.

You can do this.

I get that meals are great ways to see friends and catch up, and i'm good at making my day balance around a meal out. I just don't see why it being december needs to be an excuse for extra gluttony. I'm going home for one weekend, and have been invited to two chinese buffets, a meal and drinks out, another meal and drinks out, and a big family dinner (no issue with that, helping make it so there will be healthy options)

katcunock

When people try to offer me treats, I give them one of these

followed by lifting up my shirt and doing one of these

they laugh and leave me alone. but sometimes they insist and when they do I say diabetes and they drop it. I had type II nearly 3 years ago and don't anymore.

Love this

littlemeowmaid

Some people give me attitude when they realise i'm not eating something/ doing something because of a diet and it drives me CRAZY, espeically when it's from people who complain about their own bodies, atleast I'm doing something about it!
I'm not banning myself from anything and if i want to go out for dinner etc, I'll try and make good choices and work off the bad choices!
Otherwise I take the high road and cop it on the chin.
I make my own choices if people don't like them they can deal with it

Vailara

I know what you mean, but don't think it's always that people are trying to sabotage you. I think sometimes they're just trying to be nice. Having a meal "off", or a day off for special occasions can be healthy and sustainable. It's just that I would prefer to choose for myself when I'd like to do that . However, I'd HATE if people were telling me that I shouldn't eat x, y or z, or shouldn't go to a buffet. That would upset me much more!

It doesn't happen to me very often, and I'd cope in different ways depending on the situation. For instance, if I wanted to be with those people on that night at the all-you-can-eat buffet, I'd go. Then I'd either not eat very much, or have a night off and eat a bit more than usual. Usually I find people understand when I say I'm trying to stick to my diet, trying to not snack between meals, etc.

I think it's a fact of life that social interactions do focus on food, so it's important to find a way to deal with that. Alcohol bothers me more. I've found that my social life has plummetted since I cut down drinking. I hate splitting the bill with heavy drinkers if I'm a bit short of cash, and I don't like spending money on soft drinks that I don't enjoy. I still haven't worked out how to deal with that!

katcunock

i think the problem i'm having is that a lot of different people are saying it to me all at once, and if i did what they said it would result in basically a week long binge.

katcunock

I know what you mean, but don't think it's always that people are trying to sabotage you. I think sometimes they're just trying to be nice. Having a meal "off", or a day off for special occasions can be healthy and sustainable. It's just that I would prefer to choose for myself when I'd like to do that . However, I'd HATE if people were telling me that I shouldn't eat x, y or z, or shouldn't go to a buffet. That would upset me much more!

you're right, this would upset me a lot too!

JesterMFP

Sabotage? I don't know... to be honest, it sounds a little paranoid to think that everyone around me is busy thinking about how much I'm eating, and my weight goals, and intentionally trying to make me fail or gain weight. I'm not saying you're paranoid, but I just don't personally see it as sabotage. People have other priorities than you and in most cultures, food is an important part of social interaction. Add to that the hype we receive at this time of year from companies trying to make us buy their food, and yeah... people can go a little crazy with the over-indulgence.

The people around you are either not thinking about you and your weight loss goals, or maybe they're looking at you, seeing how well you've done, and think that you might want to loosen up on the weight loss a bit for Christmas. That's not a totally outrageous idea, but it's something that's up to you. If you want to stick 100% to your goals, then that's fine. I know it's hard but in the end, if you go out to a buffet, it's up to you what you choose to eat or drink. No one is (I presume) holding you down, forcing food into your mouth. Sometimes people are jealous of someone losing weight, but in most cases, they're just trying to be nice.

I plan to indulge a bit this Christmas. I'm not intending to gain any weight, so I will still have to practise some degree of self-control. For me, though, celebrating Christmas is part of life, and eating indulgent food and drink is part of Christmas. That's my choice though, and if I end up gaining any weight, it's my fault, not anyone else who may have offered that food to me.

Infauna

They're trying to being kind, they're not trying to sabotage you.

fit4lifeUcan2

unfortunately most people associate food with interaction and don't know of any other way to "hang out" without it involving food or alcohol. My friends stopped asking me to go out with them when I would try to get them to do something other than eat. WHy not get the kids together and hang out in a park? My friends always wanted to meet up in a kid friendly restaurant. I would suggest the park or some playground but they didn't want to do that. Meanwhile their kids are all obese and ours are all thin and healthy. Now I try to get them to go with me for walks but they can never seem to find the time or when I am ready to go they're too busy with something else. I still go to their homes and we sit and talk over coffee but I won't do the buffet thing.

rissadiane

I too am getting sick of hearing "oh it's the holidays, it's okay!!" When I was complaining about the weight I gained over Thanksgiving (I indulged a little too much), one of my coworkers was like "It's okay, you live in the South you're supposed to eat like that!" Um.. what?!

Contrarian

They are all just jealous.

itgeekwoman

You have to figure out for you what works. Last year I was very "on target" and wouldn't stray from the menu plan or even consider foods that I thought would throw me off. This year I realized that I need to relax a bit because this is life. Christmas comes once a year and as long as I manage my intake and stay within a reasonable range, then I will be fine. I increased my calories to support my workouts and can stay within that easily.

Just workout more and you can have more food!

Relax and smile. If you aren't happy, none of this is really worth it.

IronPlayground

Build your diet around your life, not your life around your diet.

kokaneesailor

Move to a cabin in the wilderness.

meggonkgonk

Social interaction *does* focus around food in many ways. That's just kind of how socializing works. For me, the key has been figuring out how to keep social eating in my life without getting out of control. Eat a small amount, make healthier choices, or come up with reasons not to go out as often.

People aren't trying to sabatoge you, they are trying to share with you.

ManEnMotion

the amount of people trying to sabotage you around christmas is mental. It's literally the 2nd, and people are already telling me to 'treat myself, it's christmas'.

No. I don't want to go to that all you can eat buffet with you, i don't see why my social interactions have to focus on food.

People's reactions? not favourable.

I indulge, I workout, but I don't go overboard. What is so wrong with that???

How do you cope with the sabotage?Am I the only one experiencing this?

Great job with your weight loss journey and discipline. It seems that Christmas celebrations are starting earlier and earlier every year and for some reason people think that Christmas celebrations include eating large amounts of Christmas treats and booze at parties. What I did was tell everyone that I'm on this journey and if needed I remind them. I've had a couple people push the issue with me and so I've had to "sort them out".

My wife and I are planning our own Christmas party and I plan to go to other christmas events. We plan to make a bit of everything for our party. When I go out I plan to eat prior to any festivities, eat what works within cal count, if people push the issue I'll push back and lastly I'll try to chill.

Merry Christmas Everyone

Graceious1

Only YOU can make the choice as to what you put in your mouth. There will be temptations every where especially at christmas. People only sabotage themselves. I am looking forward to christmas because I love food and I love choice. I can choose to eat what's on offer or leave it alone. I will have 2 weeks off work in that time and I plan to do between 20 and 60 minutes of exercies every day. I can run or do weights at home as my Tae Kwon Do school will be closed.

Before you get to christmas make plans for what you are going to do to stay on track and if you stay on track or not it's totally down to you. Enjoy chistmas it is the most wonderful time of the year to eat, drink and be merry with family and true friends.:drinker:

amyswims

My family and friends are very supportive once I explained that my family has a very high rate of heart disease and I am trying to minimize/avoid having that issue altogether. They tend to band together because they don't want to see me sick! So, maybe try to explain that you aren't losing to look "prettier" but for your health. I do have one issue.. Alcohol. I don't like the taste of it, yet I get lot of weird looks and " oh come on, just one little glass won't hurt you!" type of comments. I've tried wine, mixed drinks, beer, champagne, you name it. I just don't like the taste or the dizzy feeling I get after ingesting alcohol. I have very low tolerance. How do you handle that? any ideas?

vjrose

I keep my before and current picture (one of those comparison ones) on my phone, people get pushy, I whip out my phone and show them why I don't overeat or overdrink (only if they don't know me well, my friends have been on this page since last Christmas). That tends to end the discussion with a smile and a congratulations.

JesterMFP

Build your diet around your life, not your life around your diet.

Worth repeating.

SueGremlin

Learning to deal with that kind of thing is all part of the journey.
The most important thing I have learned is to not involve anyone else in what I eat, and to not argue and give reasons. If you argue, people will argue back. So I just say "No thank you" and change the topic. If they persist, I say "No thank you " again. Or I take whatever they are offering and don't eat it. People never notice that part, only that you took it.

OR, I try to be a sport and take a bite if we are talking about something that is the topic of conversation. Like it or not, food is a very big part of social interaction. People aren't trying to sabotage you, they are trying to be nice and include you. Try to remember that and it may make things easier.

mwbulechek

I do not know if I would call it sabotage as much as I would call it ignorance on their part. I had to experience this at Thanksgiving "is there something wrong with the potatoes? You are not eating them" and then the whole pie thing, one of them actually brought me a piece of pie after I stated "no thank you I will be skipping pie this year."
Just do your thing, let them do theirs and do not let it get under your skin!

SueGremlin

I keep my before and current picture (one of those comparison ones) on my phone, people get pushy, I whip out my phone and show them why I don't overeat or overdrink (only if they don't know me well, my friends have been on this page since last Christmas). That tends to end the discussion with a smile and a congratulations.

And people don't persist and tell you "One little cookie isn't going to make a difference!"?

I learned that this happens more often than not.

Pamtime22

I usually am more guilty of self sabotage. Last night i sampled cookies and had large slice of pizza at mall! However i usually take offered treats from family and friends out of politeness, take a couple small nibbles and then dispose of rest when they don't see me, then say oh that was great. Just look for their trash can when they are not looking. If they offer more do the same or give it to their dog. Lol. Good luck.

vanguardfitness

I will go on a 36 hour fast if I over indulge for a holiday meal.

cappri

When people try to offer me treats, I give them one of these

followed by lifting up my shirt and doing one of these

they laugh and leave me alone. but sometimes they insist and when they do I say diabetes and they drop it. I had type II nearly 3 years ago and don't anymore.

So awesome!

cappri

I too am getting sick of hearing "oh it's the holidays, it's okay!!" When I was complaining about the weight I gained over Thanksgiving (I indulged a little too much), one of my coworkers was like "It's okay, you live in the South you're supposed to eat like that!" Um.. what?!

She was trying to be polite and make you feel better. Did you want her to say "You are right you shouldn't have eaten so much."

cappri

Build your diet around your life, not your life around your diet.

I love this!