relationship advice :( sorry

inkmonster

Sorry to bring this up since this is a fitness site. but i have a real problem here.

about 5 months ago i got reconnected with a old (online) friend of 6 years. iv helped him through a lot of crap he was going through at the time and we were deeply in love. we fell out of contact and found each other on facebook about 6 months later and. he had a girlfriend who didnt let me speak to him for 4 years. and then we both started to talk to each other again. after 3 days we were in a relationship. one month later i went and visited him. another month later i moved in. im deeply serious about this guy and we were are absolutely PERFECT together. we have fun joke around. im saying our relationship has no flaws what-so-ever.

last friday he broke up with me randomly. i got a text from one of his friends saying hes hiding something from u, i approached him and he broke up with me saying that he cant be a boyfriend, that i need to find someone else. he says he doesnt have enough time to do things he wants or to have a girlfriend, he is really into philosophy and wants to read a lot ( he has an entire bookshelf that he barely started on full of dense book that he plans to get through) plus school work and college applications. the thing is that he claims he really loves me and cares about me, but he cant put me above his strive for intelligence or his philosophy, says he doesn't want to hurt me anymore. but he still wants me to stay living with him and to be just friends but its extremely difficult for me.
he is the type to do self harming things ( not physically) but he will purposely do stuff that would ruin him. i dont know if its just a phase, if he stopped loving me. if were ever going to be back together again. im giving him a bit of space but being alone in a state all by myself away from family and friends is pretty difficult. im only 18 years old and i absolutely love and care about him to death but i cant get over the fact that this happened. i really need advice and im slowly slipping into depression, i have thoughts of going home, dying, staying here and just taking care of him till he goes off to college. but i love him and i cant just keep back from him. i havent even eaten for a couple days and its just destroying me completely. i honestly dont know what to do. leaving him and finding someone else is completely out of the question because he is the one, iv had my experience of horrible boyfriends but this one is truly the one for me. i just cant let him go. please help i have no one else