I need some advice/support about my intake?

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Ok, so I've had A LOT of issues with eating disorders in the past and after my last time in recovery, I started gaining weight, and i mean a lot ( I went from 90 pounds to 160, down to 140, and now I'm back at 158) and I need help about not freaking out about my calorie intake (I know it's not that high but I still feel like a pig?). Anyone have any advice for remembering healthy is good?