Hiding Eating?

SBHWeav

That is what I do. Today, I did super well on my food intake. Calorie goals, perfect. Honestly, my best day yet.

So WHY?!?!?! Why is it that the second I am all alone, I feel the need to binge? I ran down the street to get my MIL a drink, and while there I grabbed a bag of Flamin Hot Cheetos. And ate the whole thing. Correction. Not ate. Inhaled. I get home, everyone is in their respective rooms, doing their respective relaxing. I hang out in the living room. I'm alone, and feel the need to eat. So I go grab a couple handfuls of popcorn out of the holiday tin we were gifted.

It's not even a need, it's a compulsion. Like I HAVE to have a snack. I HAVE to eat. My DF was so proud of me today for my goals and made me feel so good about it! So why do I feel like I need to ruin it?! Help???

SBHWeav

bump?

auzziecawth66

Sounds like emotional eating... When you get the urge stop close your eyes and ask yourself am I really hungry, do I really need this and think about what you are really feeling in that moment...

Edit to say (I know I do the same thing when I'm bored or lonely, it really helps me to consciously think about what I'm doing and I find the feeling will pass)

lil_pulp

Therapy (which I started for other issues, but it's all connected for me!) has helped me learn why I did this. I'm working on those underlying issues now and my eating is much more "normal and healthy." I still struggle with the same stuff you mentioned, but I'm making progress and am confident that the progress will continue. Good luck.

SBHWeav

Shameless bump

jgandy13

I've seen on a lot of these message boards people saying bump....what does that mean?

bathsheba_c

People bump articles for one of two reasons. 1) They want to read what people write later, and commenting puts the thread in the "My Topics" list. They don't have an actual comment, so "bump" serves as a placeholder. 2) The topic was posted at a low-traffic time and sort of got pushed down to the bottom of the list, so they want to make sure that it gets the attention it deserves.

Destinie589

I agree with lil_pulp... You might need to see a therapist. Learn how to overcome that feeling. Learn ways to maybe cope and learn how to just feel comfortable in the moment without the need to binge.

Findingmyathlete

Sometimes when I binge after a perfectly good day, its because I'm subconsciously emotionally sabotaging all my efforts. In that moment I don't really believe that I can reach my goal. I think I'll fail like many times before. So, as previous poster already mentioned - I have started asking myself if I am really hungry. I pause before I inhale. I think about my calories, I think about how badly do I want the food vs how badly I want to be healthy and love my body. Then I tell myself to drink two glasses of water and walk away. Lately I have been overcoming because I have started to recognize the sabotage and my will power has started to become stronger as I have said no more often.

I think its a challenge that you have to prepare for before it happens. Write it down "This is what I'll do when I feel the need to inhale something that I don't need". That way when it happens your conscience can dig it up and play it in the background. Don't give up, don't walk away from your goals, don't beat yourself up. Find out what works for you, keep at it, and tell yourself that you deserve the body that you want. You are worth it!

kittenbobitten

Hey there. I have been a compulsive eater most of my life so I understand those feelings. When I was in my teens and early 20's I could eat myself nearly sick. I would cook a meal sized for a family and eat the whole thing. I would sneak and hide food, hide eating. I was so excited to have a job and a car (as sad as it is) so I could eat everything I wanted and no one would know.

I still have the compulsive tendencies, and some things I still can't control myself around (like movie theatre popcorn), but it has gotten better over time with me. Part of that is therapy. I have worked on other issues aside from food but those issues helped me deal better with my food issues. Plus I actively try to talk myself through the eating.

I know that is not all amazing advice, but it is what I have! I hope it helps at least to know other people are going through the same things.

HeinzPrincess

I am in the same boat!

No advice yet...still learning how to deal.

JoyousRen

It's not an uncommon thing. I have issues with secret eating. It always increases when I have emotional things going on. I have a friend that has had a lot of success with Overeaters Anonymous in dealing with it. I'm still in denial so I haven't gone that route but She has been doing it for years and I've never seen her happier.

Kelogik

I do the same thing and really haven't found a way to totally stop doing it One thing that does help (some times) like others have suggested, is just taking a minute to think if you are actually hungry and if you may regret it later. When I was smoking a lot, I used a tactic close to this where when I craved a cigarette, I would give myself 5 minutes and if I still craved it then, I'd go smoke. More often than not, I would already have my attention on something else and not even remember the craving I had 5 minutes ago.

savlyon

I've done the same thing off and on for a long time. It is so frustrating...and humiliating!! Like, I'm so ashamed of it. I totally have addict behavior (fortunately/unfortunately my only addiction is food.)

PaulW2MD

This was so me. I would go get fast food or junk anytime I was alone. I don't have an answer other than just stop. Break the pattern. Make new patterns. I have not done this in 4 months and I feel so much better.


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LisaKunz

I struggle with it, too. I made an appointment with a counselor, but had to cancel because insurance won't pay for it and I can't afford it. I just don't understand. Mostly I do so well, but if I come across something good (like homemade cookies), I inhale them before I even have a chance to think about it. It's not the calories I'm worried about, it's the behavior. I've been at this almost a year, and while the weightloss part has been a success, the thought processes (or LACK of them!) are the same. It's so discouraging. I don't know what to do.

asaw00

Some tricks to get you through. Drink water, chew gum, brush teeth, do something with your hands (like a hobby!) Ask yourself if yourself if your really hungry and eat some of what you want. Try to stick with serving sizes. Good luck! I do the same thing at night when is asleep. My go to is chocolate chips and peanut butter! Over time it has gotten less and less but its still there.

c_tap77

I've done the exact same thing. The worst part about it is the guilt I feel as soon as I've finished that bag of Cheetos which usually leads to more binge eating!

In order to break myself of the pattern I've started doing the following:

Whenever I feel the urge to binge or feel a craving for something I know I probably shouldn't be eating, I set the timer on my phone for 20 min. Usually within that 20 minutes one of three things happens: 1) Something else distracts me and I forget about the desire to binge in the first place. 2) I can talk myself out of the binge and into a healthier option 3) If I get to the end of the 20 minutes and STILL have the urge to eat whatever it is that I probably shouldn't, I will let myself have a small serving of it. The 20 minutes at least allows me to cool my head enough to realize that if I'm going to eat junk I shouldn't ruin all the other good I did and eat an entire bag of Cheetos or stop by the local McDonalds on my way home.

Another thing that has helped me is refusing to eat in my car! By eating my meals at a table at planned times (in front of others 90% of the time) it makes me think about what I'm putting in my mouth. I also keep a lot of healthy snacks that I happen to really like on hand (veggies, nuts, etc.) so if I get a case of the munchies, I don't feel the desire to run down to the break room vending machine.

ChristyRunStarr

WHY?!?!?!

Honeslty, only YOU can answer that but like others said, it's probably emotional eating

breza262

Agree with asaw00.

I've read that 10 minutes is the time it takes for your mind to switch gears to something else. So set the timer for 10 minutes and do something else, walk, read, do laundry, whatever, just to occupy your mind from eating. And put a piece of gum in. Or brush your teeth. Or drink an entire glass of water. It sounds like it's a habit that you have formed when you are bored, so now you have to change that habit. Good luck!

Bookchick887

I just have to jump in here bc I see myself in your comments. It's funny that I didn't notice this before. I mean, I knew I did it but never brought it out into my conscious mind. I guess it's time to address my secret eating. I know why I started doing it (back in my teens) but why do I continue to do it? That anxious feeling I get when I want to eat a bad food and the guilt that I have that I must hide it like anyone would care. Thanks for bringing this subject fior conversation.

mirasolabeille

This thread is so helpful to read.

SBHWeav

Thanks, everyone. I really do appreciate everyone's input.

I have thought about doing OA, but I'm honestly afraid. I hate being the new girl.

Sadly, I have always had some sort of disordered eating. When I was 13 I became anorexic. Not severe, but enough to where my family and friends KNEW what I was doing. Whenever I would eat, it was very very small, and never anything healthy. Think a small order of fries, tops. Once I was able to move past that, I felt the need to overcompensate for everything I had "missed out on". Back then, I had the metabolism though to where I could run through Burger King, get a large double whopper with cheese meal, and lose a pound. Then I had my daughter. EVERYTHING changed. No more great metabolism, no more eating whatever I liked while staying thin. So I ballooned after having my daughter. Which led to me feeling depressed all the time. Which is where I am today. All this just makes me feel crazy and I just want it to stop.

pastancil

Been there. Done that. There is a book called The End of Overeating by David Kessler that actually explains what is going on to cause that. The book is excellent, though fairly clinical as it discusses various tests in laboratories that have been done to help with the understanding of Binge Eating Disorder (which, I read the other day, has now been identified as a true eating disorder). Reading the book really helped me put a stop to many bad eating habits. Won't say the cravings have completely gone away, but will say that I have it under control. Good Luck to you.

painthoss

For me, I learned it from my mother. To this day, she swears she never eats any sweets of any kind. However, she will stuff her pockets with cookies and cake, and go into her bedroom or sewing room, or as I live and breathe, into the closet, stuff everything in her mouth at once, choke and gag, and come out brushing the crumbs off herself and denying utterly that she ate anything.

I'm not that bad, but when I'm alone I do get this feeling that now's my chance! Now I can do whatever I want, finally, with nobody to know and nobody to judge and nobody to comment.

Except me: I know, and I judge myself, and I comment on my own behavior, not with kindness and not with understanding.

Becoming self-aware enough to be able to view this emotional habit without judgement and with acceptance was a very large step to overcoming it, for me.

RobynLB

When you say you ate a whole bag of Cheetos, do you mean the size of bag that has two or three servings in it? If that's the case, eating that and a few handfuls of popcorn doesn't sound like compulsive overeating, it sounds like you were just hungry. Cutting calories makes you hungry, and being hungry makes it hard to resist eating.

mspris2u

I was just realizing here recently that I do this too! I'm really good at work or if my husband is at home but when I'm alone I eat crap and can't seem to stop myself. It's just mindless binging. I also need to keep the crap out of the house. I always say "I'll only eat 1 or just a little" and it always ends up being the whole freaking bag.

Some great suggestions here on overcoming this. I hope they help you AND me! Perhaps now that we've admitted it out loud we can start to overcome it!

SBHWeav

Robyn: Yeah it wasn't the HUGE bag, just the bag with a few servings. But I didn't feel hungry when I went to eat it. I just felt like I needed to snack. I would have been completely content the rest of the evening without it.

RobynLB

So your brain was hungry even though your stomach was not. Again, that's totally normal, especially when cutting calories. You don't need to beat yourself up over it or make it into something bigger than it is. Just recognize it for what it is and practice changing your behavior. You're going to slip up sometimes, but just keep at it. I find sometimes when I have that snacky impulse, I am really more thirsty than anything, and drinking something helps. Even something not that great -- like a coffee or tea or diet soda-- is better than eating when you're not really hungry.