Emotional problems during holidays

gjulie

Depends where you live personally I light the fire sit there and enjoy!I try to get out for a walk every day weather permitting or not! spend time cooking and have a stack of books to read,just simple stuff really,its dark and gloomy light some candles always makes me feel better! we have 5 kids and they are great but at times I need to escape for awhile!

tubbyelmo

This time of year has so much stress attached to it, when lots of us already feel below par due to the lack of daylight, you are certainly not alone. I'm from Scotland, not known for good weather in the winter - or the summer either most years! I'm happy to say this is the first time in YEARS that I've felt fairly upbeat at this time of year. It's probably a mix of things but I reckon a huge part of it is that I'm outside Monday - Friday for around 40 minutes in my lunch break - I can't say I'm getting much sunshine but I'm out in the fresh air - started just with walking but now started couch to 5k (on week 5) - and I mean in all weathers, I wrap up in waterproofs and just go. I no longer feel that afternoon dip where I almost fall asleep at my desk, I'm more alert, and I look forward to my walk/jog every day. I'm stunned I've not missed a day since I started at the end of August. Goodness only knows where the motivation has come from, maybe I just want to escape my work colleagues for a while at lunch time

Molly_Maguire

The only reason I feel "down" would be having to see my sh!tty hillbilly @sshole in-laws, and pretend to be nice to them while I watch my baby boy crawl all over their filthy dog-hair infested house and learn bad habits from them...

I love the holidays otherwise.

likearadiowave

yup.

It's all the stress, the gifts, the food, the family, the plans, the everything. Just try to relax and everything will be okay.

gkwatra

I love Christmas but the last few years have been difficult because my husband & I live far away from our families. He also started a business 2 hours away and has been very busy. We will spend Christmas together but it still feels lonely without our families. Hoping to be able to add to our family soon - a child always brings back that innocence and wonder. I still feel that wonder to some extent, but not near as much as I did when I was a kid. Missing the big family gatherings (my aunt had 7 kids, so lots of cousins :-)). Also, this is our first Christmas wihout our 15-year-old kitty . The ticker picture is of her at Christmas last year having a hey day with the opened boxes

newhabit

i struggle with this too and i think it is for me because i have a vitamin d deficiency in the winter. i always get very moody and crabby this time of year, most of it is just because of all the change and upheaval the holidays bring. we get out of our routine, have a lot of family visitors, changes in our schedule, etc. i am trying so hard to fight it and i've been taking my vitamins but it's usually tough to get through this time of year. i try to do an inventory of what is really "wrong" and i also do a list of what is "right"... sounds cliche but usualy there are more good things.

VorJoshigan

I'm doing OK this year, but I've definitely struggled in the past. Some things that seem to be working for me:

-Vitamin D supplementation. Seriously.
-Exercise more. Mostly walking for me, but if you can force yourself to do it, you will probably feel better.
-Hang out with people. Whether it's volunteering or parties or whatever, find a way to be social. I've had great success with meetup.com this year if you are struggling to meet new people. This one is HUGE.

sunsnstatheart

The holidays are a joyous and happy time for most people, but for those with a reason to not be happy its like jabbing a knife into them in twisting. You mentioned your childhood. My childhood also ruined the holidays until I had my own family and found new reasons to celebrate. If there's a difficult history there, then all I can say is face it find a new way to celebrate in your own way. There are quite a few of us out there with this issue. Always happy to chat.

swanarae

My emotional problems are not just during the holidays but all winter long. I struggle with this every year but am trying some new things out that have seemed to help me. Maybe they can help you as well.

I make sure to get at the very least 10 or 20 minutes of some sort of exercise in the mornings. Most of the time I do not get up early enough to get in a real fat burning work out, but just getting up and at least doing 10 minutes of free step on the wii or doing some crunches or jumping jacks and stretches, or even a couple of the 5min workouts that I have found on pinterest and youtube. It does not have to be as soon as I get up, but within a couple of hours of waking. It really does make my day go better.

I am eating very little processed food. I try to shop only on the outside aisles of the grocery store (except for the almighty coffee aisle and spice aisle) and to keep the majority of my purchases to fresh meat, fruit, veggies and dairy products. I never realized how heavy and draggy the processed food actually made me feel until I almost completely cut it out of my diet.

I also started keeping a journal and writing in it when I was started feeling depressed or emotional. I did notice that most of my more emotional days were when I did not do some sort of exercise in the morning for a few minutes.

I am sure that being able to share your feelings with someone will help as well. Someone who will listen and not judge

I also have heard that one of those greenhouse lights help with winter blues, but that you must not use it at least 3 hours before you go to bed and for no longer than an hour or 2 a day. I have not tried it myself so I cannot say whether it is false or not.

I hope that whatever you decide to do helps you. Just know that you are NOT the only one struggling.

cecyvaquero

I tend to get moody when the seasons change and christmas time stresses me out becuase of lack of money. I find that when I work out I feel better. If you are feeling down then get up and work out a bit. Even if its for 30 minutes. Try it. Take a kickboxing class. Those fighting classes just make me feel awesome. Try it. I also found that decorating for the holidays puts me in a happy mood also. You can also just go out for a walk and get some sunlight. You will feel better and if you need motivation you can always add me.

jsmcintyre

To answer a few questions that people have asked:

I am an Navy Chaplain
Childhood holidays were a tug between two divorced parents
I currently live in Southern California, but it has even been rainy here for several weeks
I want to be better so that my 4 kids have a better memory of childhood Christmas than I do.

I appreciate all of the helpful suggestions.

maillemaker

The shooting at Sandy Hook has ruined this season for me.

Gingersfit

It's very common to feel this way over the holidays and there can be a lot of causes. I visited my doctor last week to talk about it with him and do labwork. My thyroid med was off and he's changing that -- and that can cause depression or feeling down. My Vitamin D was also very deficient -- that's common because we're not out in the sunshine especially with the short days. He has me taking 5000 IU a day of vitamin D3 to help get that up. Vitamin D helps stablize emotional swings.

It's also important to take care of yourself -- get enough rest, try to eat healthy and pass up at least SOME of those cookies and chocolates everyone has laying around at the office. And, sounds strange but I've had to put extra thick curtains in my bedroom because of the Christmas lights across the street. I'm really sensitive to light in my bedroom when sleeping and my neighbors don't turn them off.

If you really feel blue, see a doctor. Don't struggle alone.

Gingersfit

And, BTW, please don't "diagnose" feeling down as a lack of faith. Christian joy is a celebration and understanding of what Christ has done for us. But it doesn't mean feeling "happy" all the time. As a Christian who struggles with depression, I have been told by pastors and well-meaning friends I just needed to "get over it" and "focus on the good", etc., etc., etc. But depression is a very real chemical imbalance and not a lack of faith or strength. Pray for God to comfort you but seek out, too, if there are chemical imbalances (that you can control through healthier living or not) and get help.

Dumbell_Diva

I know you all have your reasons for feeling low but this time last year I was really battling with depression, I would be in tears on and off all day some days and I would snap at anybody. BUT what has really helped me is taking up a new hobby. As silly and basic as this may sound, I bought myself a good camera and now I spend my time taking photos of the countryside, sunsets, wildlife, anything really. The act of taking the photo, editing or developing is totally absorbing and totally takes my mind away from any probllems I may have.

Of course I still have my down days. Christmas is one of those times. My parents arent very caring, my Dad is an alcoholic and my Mum is too wrapped up in herself and my brother, so Im sort of an after thought!! Im also a little low as I dont have my children this Christmas, they are spending it with my ex husband.

....My strategies are to go for a long walk. Often just being out of the house helps. Go for a nice long walk, complete change of scenery. The problems or emotions will still be there when we come back but just getting away from the house or the home makes us see the world differently. Hope this helps.

clemsonhrd

I struggle also ... I love the Christmas season but some how the "perfect christmas" never materializes ...and even though I know there is no such thing I still get a bit depressed.

sunsnstatheart

To answer a few questions that people have asked:

I am an Navy Chaplain
Childhood holidays were a tug between two divorced parents
I currently live in Southern California, but it has even been rainy here for several weeks
I want to be better so that my 4 kids have a better memory of childhood Christmas than I do.

I appreciate all of the helpful suggestions.

Make Christmas and the other holidays about your own kids. it finally worked for me.