Please help my motivation and self esteem = low

nicstir

Hi I am a young single mother of a wonderful daughter. I weigh in at 233 pounds, I am 5'9 and very upset about how far I let myself get. I am one who starts things and never finishes I never finished a thing in my life. An lately I've been realizing that and it hurts because I used to be so happy. Don't get me wrong I am very proud of my daughter, I love her very much. But I am not happy with myself and feel like me being fat affects her because I am lazy to go and take her for a walk or sledding or visiting her family. We don;t go anywhere due to my self esteem. I know this sounds like I am whining or complaining. But I never do I hold everything in and hide myself. I need motivation I need someone to say hey get your bum out of bed off the couch and go for a walk. An tell me not to eat so unhealthy. I don't know maybe I need to find that strength in side myself. But I don't think I have it. Actually I probably don't. Maybe I'm waiting my time trying. Who knows but I would like it if you can add me as a friend. Maybe we can help each other motivate each other. I am just tired of this feeling already.

pastryari

You should add Leakramirez as a friend. She's also a mother and she loves helping motivate others.

newjourney2015

First of all you have to want to make changes in order to make changes and it sounds like you do. Pick 1 thing to change and do that until you are ready to pick something else. Example: decide to take your daughter to the park, or to walk around the mall (you don't have to spend $ - my mother called it "window shopping"), anythig to get out and walk or move. You know the saying - a body at rest tends to stay at rest, a body in motion tends to stay in motion. You didn't mention how old your daughter is but you can find something to do that is age appropriate where y'all can go "play" together. Once you start moving, you will start feeling better and a new level of motivation will surge upon you. While you are getting adjusted to "moving" pick 1 thing to change from your diet. Example: stop drinking soda's or eating chips. Pick 1 and do that. Add something healthy like carrots and a little ranch dip to take the place of the missing "crunch" snack food. You just have to start. Remember - you don't have to be great to start but you do have to start to be great!

Pick yourself up and start doing something - anything! Your daughter will thank you!

chaoskitty

I'm a mom too.... I know the first year of my daughter's life I was just too exhausted. AND I'm an emotional eater so when I'd look at myself I'd get bummed out and then I'd eat even worse... I'm the type that every time I see progress I some how do something self sabatoging to mess it up. That's why weight watchers wasn't worth it for me.

I'm finding the people on here are really nice and you can find lots of motivation in watching them lose weight... eventually you start to realize only YOU can make the changes and your worth it.

It's all starting to click... but it took me 14 months before I started to really feel like I could do this. Stick to it.. and don't give up. Track everything you eat even on bad days and eventually you will start looking at the pizza hut pizza as 700 calories instead of not even thinking about it. Small changes will eventually turn into habits.

danasings

Hi I am a young single mother of a wonderful daughter. I weigh in at 233 pounds, I am 5'9 and very upset about how far I let myself get. I am one who starts things and never finishes I never finished a thing in my life. An lately I've been realizing that and it hurts because I used to be so happy. Don't get me wrong I am very proud of my daughter, I love her very much. But I am not happy with myself and feel like me being fat affects her because I am lazy to go and take her for a walk or sledding or visiting her family. We don;t go anywhere due to my self esteem. I know this sounds like I am whining or complaining. But I never do I hold everything in and hide myself. I need motivation I need someone to say hey get your bum out of bed off the couch and go for a walk. An tell me not to eat so unhealthy. I don't know maybe I need to find that strength in side myself. But I don't think I have it. Actually I probably don't. Maybe I'm waiting my time trying. Who knows but I would like it if you can add me as a friend. Maybe we can help each other motivate each other. I am just tired of this feeling already.

You may not like this answer, but you HAVE to motivate yourself. NO ONE ELSE will do that for you. I was where you are after my 2nd son was born. But almost one year ago I started tracking my food, I got myself off the couch, put my two sons in a double stroller, and started walking them every day. Then I started lifting weights again. You need to change your own mind, nobody else can make you important to yourself.

Sugarhiccup03

Sorry you feel this way. It does help when you have support and motivation from others working towards the same goal. I have quite a bit to lose myself. I just had to get my mind set to do it.

DontStopB_Leakin

You should add Leakramirez as a friend. She's also a mother and she loves helping motivate others.

No. I don't.


I only motivate those who can motivate themselves.


You let yourself go? So what. Do something about it. I was 288 lbs. Instead of wallowing in my own self pity, I got my *kitten* off the couch and made a change. It took sweat, tears, a little blood, and 3 years....but 134 lbs later, it was completely worth it.


I motivate myself. I don't need anyone else to do it for me.


Also, it's called "self" esteem for a reason. Only you can fix it.

chaoskitty

I think your story alone is motivational... you go girl!

BurtHuttz

Hello; as you can tell, some people around here really like to motivate using the "tough love" approach; you know, get you fired up.

I don't need to tell you that being a single parent is tough and I'm glad to hear that you want to make a change, not out of vanity, but so you can be a better mom.

Find out about how many calories you should be eating a day to lose a reasonable .5 to 1 pound per week, and start tracking your food religiously. Everything will come out in the wash :-)

♥Amy♥

As others have posted, you have to do this for yourself. No one else can motivate you or make you do it. You just have to want it.

Before starting this lifestyle change, I was a 4'11" 223 lb. mother of 2. I went from a size 24W in pants and a XXL shirt to now a size 5 pants and an XS shirt. Nothing drastic, nothing extreme. I just decided that I wanted something different in my life. I wanted to be healthy and active for my boys. I started out by just reducing portions and walking around our subdivision. I then incorporated healthier food options and then a year ago began running.

There are a ton of great people on MFP that will help you along the way...just ask them

Good luck with your journey. And you can do this!

nicstir

Thanks so much I will take all your advice I'm feeling better already. Today's the day I mean it this time!! Thanks you guys!