Gym at hotel with pool and children in changing rooms?

BinaryPulsar

Obviously kid safety is the most important thing. I personally would be rattled changing or showering with woman's son there as long as he was behaved and not a minute older than 10, although I would prefer they use the family room if available. I take my 5 yo in the family room, although I went with my dad when I was kid until I was about 9, but that was the 80's, a different era.
I am curious what other women would think of their husbands taking their daughters into the man's locker room.

My husband takes our daughters swimming and he will bring them into the family room for them to get changed. And he will change in the shower stall for privacy. He doesn't take them into the men's room. If it is just to use the bathroom he will let them go into a bathroom on their own.

rml_16

I understand about the people with tall children. My daughter is 8 and since the age of 7 people have thought she was 10 because she is so tall. She is almost as tall as I am, so seeing her next to me just makes her seem that much taller. And if I take my daughter into a changing room, she probably looks at the women also (and if she were a boy people might misinterpret that). It's just kid curiosity, and that is normal.

That's a good point. I met a family the other day with GIANT children (as in tall, not fat)! Their 4-year-old could have passed for 10.

LaceyCwell

UHM YEAH, 10 years old he knows exactley what he is looking at and that is so inappropriate. I would have complained immediatley. She should have used a private room or sent his grown butt to the mens side Lmao

LMick1986

I think I would have said something. Our gym's rules state that if the child doesn't need assistance in the bathroom (opposite sex), they are not allowed.

aquasw16

Yeah 10 is a little too old.

Jentorres8814

I would address the mother and let her know what is going on. Like you said she seems to be at her wits end and may not even notice. There may be other factors as well that may not be prevalent.

I have a 9 year old son and when I bring him to the gym with me he has to come in the changing area with me. We have an open changing room with a few stalls with curtains and we change in there but there are a lot of women who change out in the open. We also have a similar sign about the age of children in the changing areas.

The only difference is my son is special needs and is not capable of going into the men's changing area alone. Looking at my son you would not guess this..he looks like an average 9 year old. But explaining to the front dest the situation we get the ok. Sometimes it's about safety and not so much convenience.

You have a right to your privacy as well. I would first approach the mother and then approach the front desk/customer service area and they may be able to attend the problem without getting anyone involved. But until it's resolved maybe trying to get into a spot where it's enclosed to change.

kelsully

I would never allow my son to be in there. At 10 years old the boy needs to be out of there. That Mother needs a reality check. The Mom should change quickly and have the son wait outside the changing area.

We have faced this issues a million times taking my 3 daughters to their swim lessons were then were younger as they were toddler classes going on the same time as the bigger kid classes. We had to insist on the 6 and under policy saying if a child is 6 and under they can accompany mom or dad into a different gender locker room but older than that the kids have to go through their own locker room.
A few things to note as arguement to this.
1. My 8 year old daughter is the same height as her 10 year old sister. My 8 year old is tall like her Daddy and 10 year old is short like me. People often have no idea how old someone else's kids are.
2. People are amazingly willing to change behavior if asked nicely....ie...."Since there is only one changing cubicle I need to change out here in the locker room, would you mind asking your son to look away while I change, I am a bit uncomfortable? If the mom and kid act all hinky then no rule posted about ages etc would make a difference anyway as they likely think that rules only apply if they suit them. But likely the mom will make kid turn away, even if she does so in a huffy way or they will storm out of the locker room aggravated and agast but the right thing will be reestablished in the locker room in which women and young girls in my case can change without feeling gawked at.
3. Some children have special needs and despite age need more assistance from their parents and thus need to be with mom or dad at an older age than we might find appropriate. The parent should still, IMO, make every effort however to keep those around them comfortable.
4. If you are a parent that will be pushing the limits of a rule, ie bringing an 8 year old boy into a locker room full of women, and trust me an 8 year old boy can handle changing his shorts on his own in the men's room, the responsibility of making other people comfortable is on your shoulders. A few, I am about to enter with my son, comments....and making sure your son makes every effort to avert his gaze, and being as fast as possible....no one should have to report you or feel uncomfortable just because you believe you have a right or a reason to bring your son into a women's room.
5. Complain people...then...not here (this is fine too) but complain immediately to the staff so the family can be addressed or rules can be established.

kelsully

Oh, point 2...if you are at a hotel...then wrap a towel around the kids and go back to the room to change.

or throw some sweats on over damp suit and do a quick change in the car.

My kids are swimmers...all four of them, and we have done complete wardrobe changes in the bleachers...from swimwear to street clothes, by making towel tents. But we have also driven home with wet buts to change at home. If we have somewhere else to go after swim we find a way without ever sending the 5 year old boy into a locker room of 8-18 year old girls.

Wickedbookworm1977

I knew I'd find fellow gym people in here so this is why I put this in here. I train at a gym in a hotel. They have a large pool and there are swim classes and a lot of hotel guests with children.

Just wondering about your thoughts... the changing room is open plan with a few small closed rooms for changing. Today a mother and her two children were in the changing room while i was changing out of my workout gear and into my swim togs. In Ireland, people tend not to be too stressed about being naked the few seconds it takes to change. I know different countries and cultures have different social mores about nudity.

Anyway, the woman's daughter was running around screaming not wanting her hair brushed. She was naked and about four or so. What made me most uncomfortable was her son, approximately aged 10 or so who was also in the changing room. He was also changing and spending a lot of time staring at me and other naked women. I felt really uncomfortable about this and wondered why she didn't bring them into the private rooms or send him to the men's changing room.

After she left, I noticed a sign that said children over the age of eight were not allowed in the opposite sex changing rooms. What are your thoughts? I'm a regular in this gym and it was one of the few times I've felt very uncomfortable and considered using the private changing areas myself, even though I wasn't fully changing, just putting on togs.

What do you think? Would you have suggested to her to take the kids into the private rooms or even outlined the rules to her re age of opposite sex children? (I didn't notice them myself until I was leaving)

10 yrs is a bit old for doing that. It would make me uncomfortable too. Staring, not cool!