How do you say 'No"

NatalieG70
NatalieG70 Posts: 11
in Health and Weight Loss
Does anyone have a problem with saying no to alcohol? I'm not talking AA limits, but what do you do when you lead a very social life and everyone around you is having a beer or a glass of wine - or my personal favourite....bubbles! How far down do you have to dig to find the self control to say "no thanks, I'll have a glass of water!!!!!"
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Replies

  • Castine12
    Castine12 Posts: 10
    Well, I try my best to avoid unnecessary calories, even when it comes to alcohol. When it's the right time, right occasion, then sure enough I'll enjoy a glass of champagne or whatnot. When I'm at a bar, I usually order a vodka tonic/soda. They tend to have the lowest amount of calories as opposed to a margarita or some fancy martini.

    I usually don't have a hard time to say "no" because I'm an extreme lightweight. I get red so easily after barely taking a drink, so yeah.

    I guess you could say you're the "designated driver" lol. I'm always that person because alcohol hardly tempts me.
  • onyxgirl17
    onyxgirl17 Posts: 1,722 Member
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  • neanderthin
    neanderthin Posts: 10,207 Member
    I don't get it, I guess. What other people do has nothing to do with me. If I happen to want a drink I will, if not, I won't. Lead, don't follow.
  • phildawson75
    phildawson75 Posts: 205 Member
    I'm guessing the OP is talking willpower over sticking to goal calories rather than peer pressure to have a drink if everyone else is. I guess it comes down to how often you are socialising with alcohol, and if you're going on a night out to get hammered or just nicely tipsy. I would agree that drinking the same quantity as others is silly with just casual drinking. Everyone has different willpower levels, I say to myself do I really need or want this before drinking/eating, and pre-logging can help too.
  • glovepuppet
    glovepuppet Posts: 1,710 Member
    drive!

    these days ''i'm driving'' is something nobody will argue with.
  • ladyartichoke
    ladyartichoke Posts: 22
    I like the suggestion to drive, unfortunately since we moved to a city with great public transport we nixed the car. Which does help me exercise more but doesn't help with the alcohol issue.

    OP, yes I find it very hard to say no. I regularly had a G&T (and unfortunately I can't get low cal tonic here), especially for an aperitif. And I like a nice glass of wine or two with dinner. I try to stick to one (small one) now.

    I agree with the poster who suggested pre-logging, I do it to work out meals and treats. Also, I find the less I eat the less I am able to drink because I get merry more quickly (less lining the stomach).
  • secretchallenge
    secretchallenge Posts: 14
    There are a few things that can make me say no:
    1. having something important to do after the party, when I want my head to be fresh.
    2. thinking about cancer dangers of alcohol, as well as thinking about my liver and how much older I would look if I drink....
  • 714rah714
    714rah714 Posts: 759 Member
    Find some friends that like to do things that don't center around drinking
  • purple_tux1
    purple_tux1 Posts: 250 Member
    Come prepared. You don't have to drink water. Bring something fun like diet pop or somethign else that won't cost too many calories.

    Perhaps you can mix your drinks with diet gingerale?
  • vanguardfitness
    vanguardfitness Posts: 720 Member
    fake it? Get water with a lime in it.
  • BerryH
    BerryH Posts: 4,698 Member
    Never empty your glass. If you have a vodka and tonic, keep topping up the tonic, so when someone gets a round in you can just say, "No, I'm OK for now".
  • Nixie_Pixie
    Nixie_Pixie Posts: 8
    "I promised (insert friend's name here) that I'd keep an eye on her tonight." (this works best with a female friend when you are somewhere with strangers.)

    "I'm getting over a stomach bug"

    "I try not to drink on weekdays/I'm working early tomorrow."

    "I don't drink after ___ o'clock"

    "Oh, I'm doing this healthy detox vegan yoga spiritual boot camp, do you want to hear about it?" (of course, this could easily repel people from you all night)
  • LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo
    LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo Posts: 3,634 Member
    I just try to hang out less to avoid temptations coz I'm very weak at saying no to alcohol when I'm surrounded with it
  • Bobby__Clerici
    Bobby__Clerici Posts: 741 Member
    Does anyone have a problem with saying no to alcohol? I'm not talking AA limits, but what do you do when you lead a very social life and everyone around you is having a beer or a glass of wine - or my personal favourite....bubbles! How far down do you have to dig to find the self control to say "no thanks, I'll have a glass of water!!!!!"
    I hate to say this...it's never received well....:grumble:

    If you're anything like me, you don't say no.
    And that means severing those connections and seeking out new, like-minded people.
    Good Luck...
  • 20shan08
    20shan08 Posts: 219 Member
    I used to go out a couple times a month and have drinks. But I stopped. The calories aren't worth it to me. But I don't need to try to say no anymore, I just have no desire to waste my calories in that way.
  • R0asted
    R0asted Posts: 83 Member
    drive!

    these days ''i'm driving'' is something nobody will argue with.

    This is a good "excuse". Most people can't understand "I can't drink, I'm dieting" but they'll understand "I can't drink, I'm driving".
  • sjohnny
    sjohnny Posts: 56,142 Member
    I make sure I have room for a drink or three. I enjoy drinking. But if I don't want to drink I don't. I don't usually have a problem saying no.

    Is the issue pressure from your friends to drink or is it your lack of willpower to not have the drink in the first place? Letting friends know up front that you're not interested in drinking for whatever reason should be enough that they won't pressure you to drink. If not tell them to fck off. If it's a willpower issue for you then you just need to work on making yourself do what you know you need to do. It's not easy but it's worth it.
  • TrailRunner61
    TrailRunner61 Posts: 2,505 Member
    If your problem is willpower:

    The same way I walk away from a Snickers bar. Not that I NEVER have one, just sayin.

    Tell yourself that each time you deny yourself a drink, or whatever else you think you shouldn't have so much of, it makes you stronger.

    If your problem is worrying about what people think if you don't drink:

    I used to drink and can't now due to a medical issue. I still go out with my friends and they drink so it was kind of hard at first. I was alwayssss explaining why I wasn't drinking and I had the feeling that some thought it was against my religion, I was a prude, I had an alcohol problem, blah blah blah. Now that I'm older and wiser, I just plain don't give a crap about what people think about me and what I do or don't do. If they are true friends, they should get it.
  • JacquiDawn
    JacquiDawn Posts: 43
    When I'm back home during the holidays I'm quite often driver as it just makes it so much cheaper for myself.

    When I'm at uni, I try and stick to just one type of drink throughout the night, and it's usually vodka and diet coke. I used to love wine, but it would give me a cracking hangover!
  • My0WNinspiration
    My0WNinspiration Posts: 1,146 Member
    By adding the word HELL in front....HELL NO!!!
  • sunsnstatheart
    sunsnstatheart Posts: 2,544 Member
    Does anyone have a problem with saying no to alcohol? I'm not talking AA limits, but what do you do when you lead a very social life and everyone around you is having a beer or a glass of wine - or my personal favourite....bubbles! How far down do you have to dig to find the self control to say "no thanks, I'll have a glass of water!!!!!"
    I hate to say this...it's never received well....:grumble:

    If you're anything like me, you don't say no.
    And that means severing those connections and seeking out new, like-minded people.
    Good Luck...

    ^I mostly agree with this. If its work, drink tonic or soda water with a lime and don't tell anyone. If its friends and they won't take "no thank you" for an answer then you need new friends.
  • seena511
    seena511 Posts: 685 Member
    "Oh, I'm doing this healthy detox vegan yoga spiritual boot camp, do you want to hear about it?" (of course, this could easily repel people from you all night)

    this lol
  • alpine1994
    alpine1994 Posts: 1,915 Member
    Find some friends that like to do things that don't center around drinking

    I would say this, but they're not easy to find, especially when in your 20s! Unfortunately my ideas of going to the art museum or glow bowling were not as popular as going to bars. You could offer to be the DD so you won't be tempted to drink since your friends are counting on you to get home safely. Eventually it starts to not be such a big deal to just order a club soda with lime and nobody will care or give you a hard time about it.
  • windyleal
    windyleal Posts: 20
    I am not a drinker so I have no problem turning down alcohol. When people offer something I do not eat I like to just say "thank you for offering but this doesn't fit into my plan and I've worked to hard to take steps backward now."
  • T1mH
    T1mH Posts: 568 Member
    Remove yourself from the situation. That's easy for me to say because hanging out in a bar was never my idea of fun.
  • valleemic
    valleemic Posts: 103 Member
    We seem to have quite a few social events too and yes, it is hard. I try to save up some calories to fit a drink or two in and then alternate the alcoholic beverages with something that looks like a drink like Perrier and diet 7 up with lemon.
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
    It depends on how often you're going out. If we're talking nightly, or even a few times a week, then yes, you're going to have to come up with an alternative. I'd rather use my calories for real food on a regular basis than have a drink. Just get seltzer water or a diet soda.

    If you're going out once per week, a drink or two shouldn't be a big deal, just plan your day accordingly to allow for the extra calories by keeping your eating light and/or getting some exercise in. Skip the cocktail drinks though because the sour mix and juices most of those have can really amp up the calorie count. Instead have a wine spritzer or your favorite clear liquor (gin, rum, vodka) mixed with a diet soda. Either of those choices will be about 100 calories.
  • Baileytoo
    Baileytoo Posts: 5
    I usually go out on either Friday night or Saturday night and try to limit the calories during the day because I know that I am going to have a beer, that is not my favorite but a light beer, with low calories allows me to milk it. Then if I want something else I'll have it and then the next day will work off all the calories that I consumed the previous evening. Mind you that I only do this once in a while, have the extra, if you get stuck in the social situation like you're talking about it's just mind over matter, do what you prefer and don't feel guilty. You can always throw in some extra workouts.
  • Bobby__Clerici
    Bobby__Clerici Posts: 741 Member
    Does anyone have a problem with saying no to alcohol? I'm not talking AA limits, but what do you do when you lead a very social life and everyone around you is having a beer or a glass of wine - or my personal favourite....bubbles! How far down do you have to dig to find the self control to say "no thanks, I'll have a glass of water!!!!!"
    I hate to say this...it's never received well....:grumble:

    If you're anything like me, you don't say no.
    And that means severing those connections and seeking out new, like-minded people.
    Good Luck...

    ^I mostly agree with this. If its work, drink tonic or soda water with a lime and don't tell anyone. If its friends and they won't take "no thank you" for an answer then you need new friends.
    My problem was never them but me.
    Sure, they'll take no for an answer, but I won't drink water if everybody else is drunk and partying.
    I had to just decide that I no longer wanted to be that guy.
    I needed new friends into fitness, health and general wellness.
    It's a personal choice each of us make.
  • quirkytizzy
    quirkytizzy Posts: 4,052 Member

    "Oh, I'm doing this healthy detox vegan yoga spiritual boot camp, do you want to hear about it?" (of course, this could easily repel people from you all night)

    :laugh:

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