Struggling to get it together....

nursemarie162

I have been heavy for a majority of my life, and two weeks ago I finally reached my point of no return! I realized that I was the heaviest that I have ever weighed and instead of gettting depressed about it I decided to DO SOMETHING!....the only problem is though I am getting great support from my family...my friends have not been so supportive...they have been continously discouraging me from exercising, encouraging me to eat 'whatever', and drink alcohol....my friends are all super skinny and they dont know what its like to be heavy and have to lose the weight....i guess im just realizing that my goal to transform my body is going to really affect EVERY part of my life...I dont see my "friends" sticking around and its scaring to be going into a new chapter of my life with no one there....Is it wrong to want to feel good about myself and be comfortable in my skin? they make me feel so selfish and wrong...any words of wisdom? anyone else have to completely wipe their WHOLE LIFE clean?

HPChelsey

You are NOT wrong to want to feel good about yourself and comfortable in your skin. If they are giving you a hard time or are discouraging you or putting you down, you don't need them any way! Real friends will love you for who you are, but support you in any way possible. Many of my "friends" no longer talk to me because I don't drink alcohol, I'm married, and I have a child. Every time I have a major life change, a few of my friends drop off the map. Sometimes, it's good to wipe the slate clean!

I too have been heavy most of my life. Not like crazy heavy, but I've always been in the "overweight" area. It's hard to have skinny friends who don't have to lift a finger... But, it will catch up to them while we, who are taking control, will come out on top! Feel free to add me!

Moya6512

Use the negativity to fuel you. Shine bright like a diamond and they will have no choice but to acknowledge your effort. I know exactly how you feel. Not everyone in your circle will understand your dreams and goals. Surround yourself only with people that will take you higher. Someone fresh off the bottle, going through rehab, is not going to be successful at a bar with his buddy's. He is not strong enough, because he is not disciplined enough yet. Get me.....This is a journey.
Don't allow people to get in your way.

weston23

I am with you, that is good advice. Fortunately I don't have that issue, my issue is getting over the holiday hump now and get back on track. I am just lacking the motivation to get back to exercising and working out I am going to try today I think meeting people and friends on here is a great way to get motivated and stay motivated!! We can do this.

PaulineRiddell

Sounds to me that you'll be losing unhealthy friends to make way for new healthy friends in your life. Ones who will share the same goal of taking care of themselves in the long term. It won't happen overnight and there will be times you feel lonely. I know it's hard so go for a walk in the fresh air, ask someone after exercise class if they want to go for a healthy meal and if you hang around at the gym long enough people talk to you. I wish you luck. I've just signed on as well. Just moved country and put on over 28lbs and I wasn't light to start with. Most importantly these people won't look after you when you suffer health complications from your weight. You have to look after yourself. I wish you luck.

Clbuwg

First off- GO YOU for wanting to feel good about yourself!

I know exactly what your going through, Im in college and all my friends do is party and drink, drink and party more and their all "SLB's" (skinny little...women). They didnt understand when I said that I wanted to start getting in shape, eating right and exercising and the jokes were harsh and ignorant. I didnt ditch my friends completely but I figured- if your not going to be something positive, then your going to be nothing at all- and we hang out less and less. In many ways that was probably one of the most intelligent things to do because I realized that being around that unhealthy lifestyle (drinking, eating out, staying up late, not exercising, snacking on junkfood) was a bigger part of my life than I realized and I needed to take a step back and focus on ME and MY GOALS.

So your right, making this lifestyle change is going to affect every aspect of your life, but only in the most positive way! You dont have to do it alone, you already have the support system you need and in the end no one is going to do it better than you. Since passing on the old friends Ive made several new ones- where of all places??? IN THE GYM. Similar chicks going through the same dilemma and on the same journey. Its just a matter of making oneself get up and do it, positively reinforcing the things you accomplish, and realizing that a change like this can be for no one else other than yourself. SO your RIGHT AGAIN- be selfish! This is all about you becoming a better you!

nursemarie162

Thank you everyone for the loving words and advice...I guess I thought this transformation was just going to be my body and now im realizing that I am completely transforming myself and growing as a person. Im so happy to have the support on here and its has helped me so much. 2013, for me is about making the changes in my life that encourage me to love myself fully and finallly reaching a goal that I have been struggling with my ENTIRE life...2013 is the year of change for us, sooooo lets get out there and KICK ITS *kitten*!!!!!:drinker: :drinker: :drinker: :drinker: :drinker: :drinker: :drinker: :drinker: :drinker: :drinker: :drinker: