When Anorexics Try to Add You

supplemama

The original content of this post has been removed and this topic has been locked.

stephdeeable

While I agree that it concerns me and saddens me to see these profiles, what if that girl was to see this post and whatever comments you may get on it? Think of how it will make her feel. While it probably wouldn't have accomplished what you wanted, messaging her directly would probably be the better way to go.

As for "why someone would intentionally do this?". Eating disorders are a disease, most people need professional help to overcome them. It is a life long struggle for many people.

Bobby__Clerici

NOPE!
Folks like that need professional help to heal or a funeral planner if they do not.
I have no use for that.
Adios!

EstiloPanama

I am 27 now, and even though I am 250 I feel more 'comfortable' with who I am and how I look than I did when I was 18. I remember being 18 and feeling 'fat' at 160. I remember looking in the mirror and feeling horrible and ugly, feeling depressed because I was a size 12. (LOL). Man..things have changed. I know at that age , I looked at anorexia forums, called "pro-Ana" but I loved food too much to be able to give it up. I did stop eating for a while and lost weight, but gained it all back. Thinking back, it was RIDICULOUS and unhealthy, probably messed up my metabolism. I was trying to lose weight to LOOK good for other people. I'm a mom of two kids, a college student, and engaged. I'm trying to lose weight to have a good heart, flexible and pliable lungs and be in shape! Priorities change. It's sad that whoever that girl is got down to less than 90 pounds. My brother's wife is like that. She is tall and less than 90 pounds and I used to have her on my facebook , but she would (everyday) post pictures of her on the scale, and take a picture of her weight. It would read 81.2 one day, then 82.1 another day, and she would cry about how fat she was. In fact, I used to have a friend who was trying to impress a guy and we were trying to find something nice for her to wear. She tried on her size 0 jeans...and couldn't fit into them. And started to cry because she had to wear her size 2 jeans. LOL. I had to 'comfort' her by reminding her that I wore a size 18 (at the time). It's sad I had to comfort someone by putting myself down! I was young and naive, and too focused on what others thought of me...(as many 18 year olds are).

Hopefully she finds someone in her life who encourages her to be HEALTHY , and maybe someday she will find out that healthy does not mean THIN. In fact, being anorexic and thin is just as horrible or worse than being overweight and obese. What a life..

cmriverside

Yeah, OP, the kind thing to do would be to delete (edit) your post while you still can.

This type of thing can be emotionally painful for those who are suffering in or trying to recovery from an eating disorder.

92_sweetheart

Not being rude, but I do agree with the other two posters. This can be triggering for many people suffering from an eating disorder or have suffered from one. I advise deleting this. On another note: instead of declining her perhaps you could have talked to her.

Think about it! Is NOT like they are intentionally putting their self in harms way. Many people suffering from EDs are very emotionally scarred and have underlying issues (such as Body Dysmorphic Disorder) that causes their disease.

GiftsbyNature

If She is struggling, and if she does need help - what she needs is support and compassionate direction not people saying they have no use for her. Or berating her...I hope she finds the support and help she needs...and I hope this post is deleted before she sees it.

daffodilsoup

Do you feel better now that you've called them out?

MSWDiet

HEY THERE, I DON'T KNOW YOU BUT I'M SO GLAD YOU POSTED THIS THREAD. YOU CARE ENOUGH TO REPORT THE PROFILE AND AS A PARENT I GET YOUR REASONING. THIS PERSON NEEDS HELP DESPERATLY NOT SUPPORT FOR THE ANNA/ MIA LIFESTYLE. SEEING THIS THREAD MAY CAUSE THIS PERSON PAIN BUT THERE IS ALREADY PAIN WHERE OE IS WORKING OT STARVE TO DEATH. HOPEFULLY THIS WILL CAUSE SOMETHING TO CLICK IN TH EPSHYCHE OF THE POOR SOUL AND LEAD TO SEEKING HELP.

MSW I'M NOT YELLING AT YOU ITS JUST THAT I AM HARD OF SEEING ;-)

isaacandjacobsnana

I'm sorry i don't see where Supplemomma said anything wrong so i don't see why she would need to delete her post the only thing i see maybe is she could have added her as a friend & maybe try to talk to her cause maybe she don't have anyone but at sametime i don't think she should even do that because the girl needs professional help she wouldn't listen to anyone on here we all want to lose weight we are here for eachother but you can't help someone like that she needs more than we can give her..just my opinion

WinnerVictorious

OMG some child starving herself to death tried to add me. I say child because she's only 18. Current weight is only 87 pounds!!!! Goal weight 80 pounds!!! What in the actual eff! And she has a pic up, she is rail thin and bony, this is not a very short person! Of course I declined, and reported the profile using the contact form on the site. I feel awful. I have a child that's 18, (my kids are 23, 18, and 15) and I would be so terrified and heartbroken if they wanted to destroy themselves. My goodness. What on earth could be so wrong with your life that you would intentionally do this to yourself??

i wouldn't just decline without sending her a mail and telling her why you declined her. she may have self-esteem issues, so no need to exacerbate that. let her know that you're not equipped to help somebody suffering from an ED and it's not personal that you declined. then urge her to get professional help. alot of these young girls don't understand what they are doing to themselves and many of them think they need to be ultra skinny to have friends or boyfriends and their self-image and self-esteem is wrapped up in the number they see on the scale. they need proper nutrition information, and this site can help them with that, but first they have to start getting a handle on their ED. that takes professional help.

92_sweetheart

HEY THERE, I DON'T KNOW YOU BUT I'M SO GLAD YOU POSTED THIS THREAD. YOU CARE ENOUGH TO REPORT THE PROFILE AND AS A PARENT I GET YOUR REASONING. THIS PERSON NEEDS HELP DESPERATLY NOT SUPPORT FOR THE ANNA/ MIA LIFESTYLE. SEEING THIS THREAD MAY CAUSE THIS PERSON PAIN BUT THERE IS ALREADY PAIN WHERE OE IS WORKING OT STARVE TO DEATH. HOPEFULLY THIS WILL CAUSE SOMETHING TO CLICK IN TH EPSHYCHE OF THE POOR SOUL AND LEAD TO SEEKING HELP.

MSW I'M NOT YELLING AT YOU ITS JUST THAT I AM HARD OF SEEING ;-)

By why would you want to cause more pain for someone that is already in pain. That doesn't make any sense. How do you know that she was PRO-ANNA? In her mind she probably thinks she needs to lose 7 more lbs.

nexangelus

I have been there and done that and my food diary is private...so I add them, only if they are recovering or are at a place where they are dealing with the ED...

It is all in the mind and it is a horrible disorder. I have taken 21 years to be completely symptom free...past three years have been clear though : )

ShannonECTD

I would've just kept that to yourself, we are all quite aware that there are people suffering with eating disorders on here and while we may not agree with how they eat/act they need support and positive feed back just like everyone else.

stephdeeable

I'm sorry i don't see where Supplemomma said anything wrong so i don't see why she would need to delete her post the only thing i see maybe is she could have added her as a friend & maybe try to talk to her cause maybe she don't have anyone but at sametime i don't think she should even do that because the girl needs professional help she wouldn't listen to anyone on here we all want to lose weight we are here for eachother but you can't help someone like that she needs more than we can give her..just my opinion

Yes, she probably needs professional help, not a bunch of strangers calling her out on a message board. I don't think the OP said anything particularly nasty or had the intention to be mean, but I still think someone seeing this post about themselves is more harmful than helpful.

alexbusnello

Not being rude, but I do agree with the other two posters. This can be triggering for many people suffering from an eating disorder or have suffered from one. I advise deleting this. On another note: instead of declining her perhaps you could have talked to her.

Think about it! Is not like they are NOT intentionally putting their self in harms way. Many people suffering from EDs are very emotionally scarred and have underlying issues (such as Body Dysmorphic Disorder) that causes their disease.

THIS

MoreBean13

Terrible thread. People suffering from eating disorders do need help, and definitely don't need public shaming. It's certainly your choice whether you choose to add them to your network here, but this post is uncalled for.

kmuree

I would've just kept that to yourself, we are all quite aware that there are people suffering with eating disorders on here and while we may not agree with how they eat/act they need support and positive feed back just like everyone else.

This ..

92_sweetheart

I'm sorry i don't see where Supplemomma said anything wrong so i don't see why she would need to delete her post the only thing i see maybe is she could have added her as a friend & maybe try to talk to her cause maybe she don't have anyone but at sametime i don't think she should even do that because the girl needs professional help she wouldn't listen to anyone on here we all want to lose weight we are here for eachother but you can't help someone like that she needs more than we can give her..just my opinion

It is VERY triggering to people suffering from EDs.

alexbusnello

I'm sorry i don't see where Supplemomma said anything wrong so i don't see why she would need to delete her post the only thing i see maybe is she could have added her as a friend & maybe try to talk to her cause maybe she don't have anyone but at sametime i don't think she should even do that because the girl needs professional help she wouldn't listen to anyone on here we all want to lose weight we are here for eachother but you can't help someone like that she needs more than we can give her..just my opinion

It is VERY triggering to people suffering from EDs.

This is true

Velum_cado

What on earth could be so wrong with your life that you would intentionally do this to yourself??

It's a mental illness, so it's a bit more complicated than that.