Anyone with rocky relationships...

projectxreborn

Anyone with rocky relationships have a complete turnaround once you started losing weight?
My husband and I were not really rocky but we seemed to be drifting apart more and more.
Now that things have improved so much, I have really noticed how sad things really were.
We didn't fight or argue but we weren't really working on being close. It was just a going
through the motions sort of existence. We are not at goal yet but I think we are more in love
now than when we got married 12 years ago. My husband talks and smiles more
which I am loving. And I am sure I am a bit more cheerful as well. Didn't expect this type of
bonus.

Rinylee

I know that when I feel better about myself I'm more confident, in turn more attractive to my partner. When I feel like I need to lose weight, I don't have enough confidence to feel sexy, and he notices it.

projectxreborn

Exactly...what I also didn't expect is that as he is feeling better he is more confident
with me as well. He has always acted like the strong silent type, but he is starting to
let out his playful side. It is just so weird for me to realize how uncomfortable he
really felt about himself before...he always acted like it never bothered him.
He has always known how crappy I have felt about myself though, LOL.

Bronx_Montgomery

I have been on MFP for a while and have met many different people on here with opposite results. It seems that you and your husband are both losing weight (am I correct on that?). Most folks have rocky relationships because the person who is losing the weight becomes more active and wants to do more while the partner who isn't stays the same and tends to be negative towards the person losing the weight. Its crazy but it happens.

cjsacto

My boyfriend has always been pretty fit, and I didn't realize how much my weight bothered him. After seven years together, we actually broke up for a long stretch, and then it came out - that he felt I didn't want to do active things with him (only partially true, it depended on the activity) and that I didn't care about him enough to take better care of my body and my health.. [Of course there were other issues/reasons for the breakup, such as poor communication and not enough time together.] From my perspective, I had tried to lose weight all my life and was angry at his lack of understanding and support, even during periods when I did really well and was regularly getting lots of exercise.

After a miserable one-year separation, we got back together and we've been back together now for a little over a year. I was still the same size when we reconciled. I have been making real efforts to get in shape (for ME, not for him) for the last five months and I do think our relationship is improving. I'm not to the point yet that my confidence about what I look like nekkid has really improved though.

We still need to work on areas of our relationship but getting out and hiking together and going to the gym together has helped, I think. He's not totally on board with the changes in my eating (I eat more often!) but he's trying to be supportive.