Can anyone relate?

sclaibo

I am a young African-American female under 30. I loved to exercise, but i LOOOOOVVVEEE to eat more! I am really struggling with overeating on good food. I don't want to give up good food, but I don't want to gain weight or let it stop me from losing weight. I have loved to exercise ever since high school, mostly to stay thin because of my insecurities. I HATE my body shape. Although the Lord blessed me with really big breasts, I have no hips or butt. So when I gain weight, I gain it all in my upper body which is REALLY unattractive. My goal has always been to be thin enough to where my upper body is not drastically larger than my lower body. At my peak, I have been a size 14/16 pants, 2x top, and size 22 dress size. In 2007, I was going to a party and had to shop for a formal dress and was shocked that I had to get a size 22 dress. I weighed 230 lbs and I am 5'7. I lost 40 lbs that year and vowed never to let myself get that big again. Since then, I haven't gotten that big, my peak being 215 lbs and my low being 188 lbs (that was a great year). When I got to 188 lbs, I went on a shopping spree and have all these clothes when I was a size 10/12. Now, I still have these clothes and I am really hesitant to buy bigger sizes cuz I am hoping to fit back into them! But the exercises that I do to lose weight are no longer working and I can't help but eat a lot. When I lost 40 lbs in 2007, I did with MyFitnessPal and loved it. I am hoping to get some of that same motivation back. My problem now is that my husband and I live apart and he loves to eat to. Its our thing to go out to eat whenever we see each other to have fun, he insists and I don't stop him. So dieting gets really hard when I see him on the weekends. We also love buffets! I am trying really hard to stick to my new year's resolution not to go to a buffet or all you can eat place for 2013.

I live by myself, husband comes on the weekends, stressed at work, and studying for the bar! I feel like I can't get motivated and don't have the energy to exercise. I am also worried about my hair! I know that may sound selfish, but as a black woman, I really don't have time to do my hair EVERYDAY so that it is professional for work. I used to have weaves, but those are expensive (especially if I want to exercise and keep it looking nice). I want my hair to get back to being healthy and I need to let it breathe to do that. I don't want to choose between having nice hair and having a nice body.

Is there anyone out there that can relate to ANY of my problems? What do you do about it?