Calling all parents of sedentary kids!

MissyJessy

my 4 year old who is the same loves to cuddle up on the couch watch tv and is a bit of an introvert now gets mad at me when i work out and he doesnt get to take part. Watching him to jumping jacks is hilarious but he loves it and brags to all of his friends and family about how hard the exercise was that he did with me the other day.

MissyJessy

Riding is a great activity for kids who struggle with team sports... it also teaches a lot of responsibility but on the same side team work with learning to work with the animal... yes OWNING a horse is expensive but most kids that i have worked with and watched take lessons love it... generally lessons cost $20 a week, its great exercise. It gets them out doors meeting people who are the same as them.

just an idea :bigsmile: gotta push my sport some how lol

JustAGirlyGeek

Bump for later.

gailmelanie

I asked a very similar question of MFPs yesterday about my 11, almost 12, year-old daughter. It seems some people don't take kindly to the idea of being concerned about whether our kids are weak and obese until they are adults. I don't want it to come to that for my daughter because I know it will be more of a struggle for her and bad for her health if I do wait. She sees both me and her dad being active and knows we exercise to keep fit, but she doesn't find that motivating and is only vaguely interested on working out at the gym. I'm thinking the only solution is to require them to accompany us for part of our exercise and control what they eat as much as possible with some education about food content, nutrients and nutritional requirements superficially added. One thing I did when my son was young was to put him on his bicycle, tell him to stay where I could see him, if not beside me, and walk as fast as I could (or run, if necessary) to keep up. That way we both got our excercise. Another thing my family does, in good weather, is take trips around town on our bikes. We go to the library, farmers' market and out to lunch, then home again. It's probably not more than 6 miles all together, but better than nothing. I'm sure you could find areas near you that would make a good day trip on bikes.

FiestyIrish

My daughter just recently turned 8 and is also in 2nd grade and would sit around on the computer or the Wii if I let her. My husband is also a very picky eater and doesn't eat much in the veggie department, so she doesn't either.

For activities, I enrolled her in ice skating lessons this past summer and she LOVES it! If she didn't, we'd find another sport. You just have to keep trying until you find an activity or sport that he enjoys. Also, we live only 1/2 mile from her school, so on sunny days we walk to and from school. She may whine for a second when she comes out and sees me with her scooter, but then I challenge her to a race and everything's good.

For food, I made a deal with her. She has to choose one new fruit and one new vegetable to try at the store every week. If she doesn't like it, fine. She doesn't have to eat it. But we have found several new options she enjoys. If you get him involved in choosing those foods on his own, he may be more apt to try them.

PRMinx

Riding is a great activity for kids who struggle with team sports... it also teaches a lot of responsibility but on the same side team work with learning to work with the animal... yes OWNING a horse is expensive but most kids that i have worked with and watched take lessons love it... generally lessons cost $20 a week, its great exercise. It gets them out doors meeting people who are the same as them.

just an idea :bigsmile: gotta push my sport some how lol

I love riding and I think it's a fantastic sport for kids. I grew up riding horses myself, but it was a big expense for my parents.

Where do you live that riding lessons are only $20/week? Is that only if you own your own horse? One lesson per week?

We didn't own a horse, I was signed up at a stable, but even so it was pricy. I think somewhere around $50/lesson and that was in the 90s. It's not just the lessons either - the equipment and showing fees are expensive, too.

jporte

I really appreciate all the replies. Please keep the ideas coming.

A few things...

He has played sports since he was old enough. He has a "trophy" for every year from 2008-now. He's played t-ball and soccer, but also participated in Karate. He is not the most athletic kid and is kind of awkward on the field. He is aware that he isn't the fastest and that bothers him, even though we've not said a word. His friends have started making comments that tag isn't as fun when he is "it" because he isn't fast. Hearing this bothered me and clearly him, otherwise he wouldn't have mentioned it.

Do I continue pushing sports when I am well aware it affects his self-esteem? We tried Karate. He enjoyed it until his teacher humiliated him for not being physically able to do a stretch. He didn't understand what he was asking, and instead of him helping or showing him proper form he screamed at him over and over until I had to intervene. He kind of shut down in a panic. Sorry, I'm not going to allow my then 6 year old to be brought to tears because an adult is not doing their job as a teacher. It has very much scared him away from classes like that.

We are a member of a huge gym that doubles as a swim club. He goes to "kid's quest" while I workout. There's inflatables and giant climbing things. Sometimes he'll play and sometimes he won't. It really depends on his mood. We also swim a lot during the winter. He does get activity on occasion but if I allow him his stuff at home that's where he'd much rather be.

I will definitely look into the geocaching!! I realize now that I shouldn't call it exercise and just emphasis activity. We don't say the word fat around here - just healthy.

Sounds like you are trying to do all the right things to me. I have one kid who was terrible at soccer and was getting to an age that his friends would start making fun of him, so he is no longer in soccer. Found out he loves Tai kwon do though (has an awesome teacher) and we do swim team and golf in the summer ....may not be able to continue swim team because he is the slowest too unfortunately. He also runs laps around his room at bedtime...no clue why but I figure it's a great way to excercise so why stop him (he is really skinny). Eats all kinds of fruits and veggies.
My other kid who is extremely athletic but is also starting to get chunky...not due to lack of excercise because he never stops moving either but I'm pretty sure it is his eating habits. He will only eat 2 types of veggies and most fruits though and the couple of times we made him try other veggies he puked them up. I just limit his junk intake and push the veggies he will eat and fruit and hope for a growth spurt (he's also very short for his age and that doesn't help either and wears glasses now too)


Also insist both my boys go play with their friends on the evenings they don't have much homework and weekends.

My daughter is not even 3 yet and she takes dance (she loves it) and in the spring we will try and see if she likes soccer.

If he likes the karate, I would find another place to take him to...get friend recommendations, teacher just sounds like an a-hole....no need for that...
Best of Luck!

MissyJessy

Riding is a great activity for kids who struggle with team sports... it also teaches a lot of responsibility but on the same side team work with learning to work with the animal... yes OWNING a horse is expensive but most kids that i have worked with and watched take lessons love it... generally lessons cost $20 a week, its great exercise. It gets them out doors meeting people who are the same as them.

just an idea :bigsmile: gotta push my sport some how lol

I love riding and I think it's a fantastic sport for kids. I grew up riding horses myself, but it was a big expense for my parents.

Where do you live that riding lessons are only $20/week? Is that only if you own your own horse? One lesson per week?

We didn't own a horse, I was signed up at a stable, but even so it was pricy. I think somewhere around $50/lesson and that was in the 90s. It's not just the lessons either - the equipment and showing fees are expensive, too.

Look at smaller barns, the big showy barns will charge more to get into their lessons programs because they charge for tack rental and use of a lesson horse. The kids that ride at my barn which is a show barn but a bit more tight knit pay $20 for one lesson a week that includes lesson horses and tack. Lessons are for an hour.

Most barns will also allow you to work for your lessons once you get a bit older. I agree that if they get serious in it its expensive but coming from a family that couldnt afford to put me in much and the amount of trouble i got into.... i guess id rather work 2 jobs to keep my son in something that he loves and keep him out of trouble.

Even as an adult i pay $30 a lesson

mdcoug

I think you've gotten a lot of good advice and it sounds like you're already doing some of the right things.

I would just add, why don't you sit down with him and look at all the programs that your county's Parks and Rec. dept. offer? Maybe choose one a session to either try out or repeat?

Also, schedule hikes at local parks on the weekends. It's a great way to spend time with each other and get in some activity.

OkieinMinny

I may be a complete *kitten* for saying this, but I just don't understand the whole "I make 2 dinners" and "I pack him a lunch I would never imagine eating." My son is 3 and eats what I give him, if he doesn't want all or some of what is on his plate he'll see it again as part of the next meal and there are no treats.

^^ I have a motto at my house menu: eat it or starve - they have to try everything and prob 8 out of 10x they will end up liking it - he's only 7 so his taste buds are going to change and they may change from day to day - so continue to introduce new and healthy foods - I also agree with a post earlier - why are you giving him a choice with exercise - my 9 year old would MUCH rather sit on the couch or play video games - but we make him come outside with us, we tell him just give us 15 minutes and usually it ends up being an hour or more bc he's having fun playing basketball, or biking - or even play nerf wars with him - running and FUN all rolled into one!

angelz_love

Finally, on the exercise, why are you giving him a choice? He's 7.

Thank you!
This is the conversation I have with my son all the time:
"I'm an adult. You are a child. I am your mother. I tell you what to do. You do it. Remember? You can ask why but it needs to be respectful, you still have to do it, and I don't always have to explain myself..to..you." Most of the time he laughs.

Maybe you and hubby could comprimise. A healthy food day 2-3 days a week where you don't have to cook 2 x's. I was doing the same thing but now husband is working out with me. SO MUCH easier with support!

dq_diva

Regarding the eating....have you ever let him do the cooking? Give him a cookbook, let him pick out the recipe and then the 2 of you cook it together. Kids will usually eat what they have prepared themselves. I did this with both of my kids when they were that age. They will eat just about anything now!

LOVE the geocaching idea! There are geocaching clubs in this area.

I also liked the person who said "don't give him a choice, go for a walk". When I was young, my mom MADE me take short walks with her. I complained the entire time, ha! After I got my first job in a different town, all I could think about was wanting to take a walk with my mom. She died of cancer shortly after I moved. Now I just remember those walks as being a special thing I did with her and I'm thankful she made me do it

Good luck to you and your son. He's lucky to have you as a mom

jennyjo79

I know it will be difficult at first for you all, but I think it's time to start putting your foot down. Like others have said, you're the parents ... therefore, you should be in charge of his activity level & what he's eating. I'm not saying take away all treats or force him to jump into multiple sports, by any means, but start making small changes.
Luckily, Cole is a VERY active kid, who would rather be outside than sitting in front of the TV or playing a video game for the most part, but he's still not a huge jock that loves sports either. He would rather be walking in the woods or sledding than playing organized sports, so we, of course, definitley encourage that. We do, however, tell him that he needs to participate in one sport throughout the year to stay in shape. We let him choose the sport. Sometimes he does more than one a year and others it may just be hockey [which he's now been doing year round]. I am fine w/that. I just want him to be active.
Same goes for eating. Cole is a kid ( ... well, teen ... ). He still likes his treats and there's nothing wrong with that; we all do. But I limit how much junk he can have. If he's already had say, a cookie for an after-school snack then the night time snack will have to be something healthy, such as a piece of fruit or yogurt. I also do not cook seperate meals at my house. If I'm making spaghetti w/ground turkey & whole wheat pasta, that's what everyone gets. Don't like it, don't eat, but then you're not going to fill up on junk later. Let me tell you, they learn pretty cook that they better just eat what's offered.
I think our kids learn a lot by example, so next time Spencer sees you exercising maybe have a talk with him [especially if he asks questions] about WHY you exercise. Maybe make a point to tell him that you always don't LIKE doing it, but you do it because it makes you feel good and keeps you healthy. Same with eating. Cole has seen me reading labels on food before and I have taught him to do the same. I've given him the basics, such as calories & fat and most importantly, have stressed the importance of the serving size listed on foods.
Good luck, girl! You've done amazing work on yourself, there's no reason the rest of your family shouldn't benefit as well! Whether they like it or not. Someday they'll ALL thank you.

carolstartingover

I have 2 kids. They are both adult girls. They both ate the same food, had the same parents, and did activities as a child. As they got older, the youngest stayed very thin (size 2). The oldest became sedentary and at 10, I sent her to a fit club. I also bought her a treadmill, which I used one everyday. I joined her up with Nutri-system, only to find Twinkies in her closet. They are both very good kids and they get along well despite their differences. I even went to WW with the oldest and I got to goal and she quit early on. So, I am here to tell you what my shrink told me, you cannot control the fate of your child's obesity. You can do your best and pat yourself on the back like I did, but it will be up to them. Some people in the family are heavy. My siblings and I are not obese, I am overweight from taking prednisone, but I was fine before that and back on track. Their father was not heavy. My mother was obese and some of the cousins on both sides are or were. Unless they make their mind up to change, it won't happen.

tjradd73

alright girly....I totally feel your pain!!!

My son is more of a indoorsy versus outdoorsy person too!! In order to get him to do more physical activity...limit how much he can go on the computer or play games or even read!!! If you limit the things he normally does...he will have to fill his time with other things!! Also...find other activities that you can do togethor that have more benefits!! If you get him a camera, and then offer to take him hiking so he can take pics...he might be more inclined! If you offer to run a race togethor where he can get a medal, he might be more excited!!! MAKE IT FUN...LIMIT the norms!!

As for the food...that is completely up to you and your hubby...if your hubby has "crap" in the house...then allow your son 1-2 of his OWN snacks (my son gets a pack of cookies every 2 weeks and a box of fruit scacks), at first tell him that that is what he gets for the 2 weeks....when it is gone it is gone!! See how he does...if he consistently runs out week after week...then start limiting him 2 servings per day!! (let's face it...2 oreos is never enough!)

If you go out to eat....don't let him get the pizza every time....have him try new things each time!! Having him try new things will get him to learn what other things he may like and therefore intro him to some other healthier options prob!! If you go to subway...MAKE him get at least 2 veggies of his choice on the sub....I did this with my son...and now he gets like5-6 most times!!

Point being...his future is in YOUR hands....help carry him to success instead of push him to failure!

jennyjo79

If you go out to eat....don't let him get the pizza every time....have him try new things each time!! Having him try new things will get him to learn what other things he may like and therefore intro him to some other healthier options prob!! If you go to subway...MAKE him get at least 2 veggies of his choice on the sub....I did this with my son...and now he gets like5-6 most times!!

Point being...his future is in YOUR hands....help carry him to success instead of push him to failure!
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Love your idea on the veggies at Subway! I always make my kiddo eat SOME of whatever veggie we're having for dinner at home, but when he goes to Subway he just gets meat, cheese & lettuce on his sandwich. I always think, 'How boring,' but since we're dining out I let him choose. I think in the future I'll apply the 'pick at least 2 veggie' rule when we go to Subway. While he doesn't hate veggies, hopefully he'll learn to love them as much as I do eventually!