Motivation vs. Defeatism

Krilpa

I've been doing really good about changing my diet and I'm starting to get more motivated to exercise. I've found that my big problem is motivation vs. defeatism when it comes to this step. I was watching the show Heavy on A&E last night and these people spend six months working out 5+ hours a day and lose a lot of weight. I'm currently not working so I have the time to do the same but the problem is - I don't want to. I want to exercise and I think if I do an hour a day of cardio and then some weight or targeted training that is reasonable.

This is were my defeatism kicks in.Its not EXTREME ENOUGH or FAST CHANGE. I see these people doing 4-5 hours a day and I think I should be doing that. "Should" is an evil word, I know this from my work as a therapist and from personal experience. I keep thinking I should do more I should try harder to lose weight I should do these extremes and then I get unmotivated and feel completely defeated before I even try.

I should do the things that these people on TV are doing. I'm an educated women, I know that is bull****. So why is it still eating away at me?

What is it about these "Role Models" on TV that are giving me such mixed messages. O wait - its not real life and its not sustainable.

So how do you stay motivated and not defeated? I want to know because I need to have more real life support. I need someone to tell me that I am not wrong in thinking that I need to stop watching these weight loss shows as they are doing me more harm than good.
Good for those people on TV, but I shouldn't relate to you, because I am not you and my journey is different.

Comments and Thoughts Welcome!

emilyc85

I am very much the same way
It is all or nothing and I get very discouraged very easily. exactly what you said is what you need to do. Probably stop watching those shoes. Every single situation is different and the feeling those shows (seem to be) giving you are not healthy for you and your weight loss goals
You have got this!!
Feel free to add me if you want or need somebody to talk to

Good luck to you!!

gsschulte

I understand the need to fix everything right now, its a easy way to fool yourself into not doing anything.

Some of the greatest minds of our time found out the one universal truth of improvement, if you do not fail you are not trying hard enough, or as Thomas Edison put it "I merely found 10,00 ways not to make a light bulb." you need to give yourself the freedom to actually try with no expectation of blowing it out of the park. its okay to make a base hit as long as your swinging. If you do the same thing you will get the same result.

newhabit

focus on how far you've come each and every day.

just getting on here is one step forward
just tracking one day
just tracking one week
just doing one workout
losing 1 lb

think of it as small steps, one day at a time.
of course you see big changes on tv. that's what tv sells. and that's not reality
and working out that much could be bad for your body if you're not used to that much physical activity.

morkiemama

Those EXTREME programs are actually very unhealthy and are not the way you should be losing weight. So you SHOULDN'T be doing that stuff, even if you have the time. The healthy way is in moderation and not making your body beyond exhausted/puking during workouts/etc.

You SHOULD be doing what you are doing. A consistent, steady, maintainable workout program and eating healthy. YOU GOT THIS!!!!!

mediastar

We have shows like that over here too. I'm sure if you ask any of the stars what they truly wish for, their answer would be 'a second series'. The Producers would ask for a 'higher advertising revenue stream '

bookworm_847

I understand the need to fix everything right now, its a easy way to fool yourself into not doing anything.

Some of the greatest minds of our time found out the one universal truth of improvement, if you do not fail you are not trying hard enough, or as Thomas Edison put it "I merely found 10,00 ways not to make a light bulb." you need to give yourself the freedom to actually try with no expectation of blowing it out of the park. its okay to make a base hit as long as your swinging. If you do the same thing you will get the same result.

Love this!

I failed before by setting these huge goals and putting extreme expectations on myself (absolutely no more chips or pop, work out 5 times a week for an hour each, lose all my extra weight within a short period of time, ect). When I couldn't meet those marks, I got frustrated and depressed and just gave up altogther... adding another 10 pounds in the process.

This time around, I'm setting small goals for myself and using that momentum to get more things going. I'm slowly taking Pepsi out of my daily diet; I don't think I've had a whole can or bottle of Pepsi in a couple of weeks now. I set a goal to get up early 3 days a week to work out for a half hour, and have actually been getting up 4-5 times and working out for 30-45 minutes just because I've found a workout I enjoy.

Everyone has different things that work for them, but small steps are probably the way to go.

Good luck!

msudaisy28

I can't imagine working out for 4-5 hours a day consistently, even if I had the time! I keep myself motivated by setting small, mini goals and focusing on those. I see that you've got your ticker set for a large weight loss - maybe you can break that up in to 10 or 20 lb increments. I have mini-goals at every 10 lbs and milestone goals at a 10% loss from my previous weight. My ticker is set for my ultimate goal weight now, but that's because I'm in the homestretch!

Also, I try to focus on fitness and nutrition goals that I feel are reasonable for me. I've found walking to be a very good form of exercise that I can consistently get in, so I set goals for the number of steps that I'm going to take each day, week, month and year. I try to not compare myself to others, as much as possible. I also have set my calorie goal on MFP to be fairly generous and don't worry so much about how fast I'm losing as long as I'm making progress. This means that I have more calories to play with and I don't feel deprived most days. My deficit is currently at 250 calories/day (1/2 lb loss per week). Even at the beginning of MFP I had it set at no more than 500 cals/day (1 lb loss per week).

Good luck - if you stick with this you'll be fine!