Afraid of failure

Hey everyone. It's a new year meaning new starts and of course resolutions. This year I opted not to make a resolution, just be more productive. I want to loose weight...I need to loose weight...but I just don't know where to start. I have tried so many things....I have even tracked here on and off but something alway comes up and just like that i'm off track. Now I'm afraid to even try again because I'm just like "what is going to be different this time than all the other times". I am going to be 30 this year, it's a big one and I would just like to have accomplished one of my life goals by then but I'm having a hard time getting going. I need help..I don't know what to do, just tired of failing.

Replies

  • rockangel8907
    rockangel8907 Posts: 429 Member
    If you don't do it you have already failed. If you are truly ready nothing will stop you.
  • GellisIndigo
    GellisIndigo Posts: 55 Member
    If you don't do it you have already failed. If you are truly ready nothing will stop you.

    This. Exactly this.
  • XanthePersephone
    XanthePersephone Posts: 34 Member
    It doesn't matter what you choose to do so long as you decide it is a part of your life and keep your focus. You can do it.
  • deb3129
    deb3129 Posts: 1,294 Member
    Just take small steps. Decide that you are going to drink less soda, or more water, or eat more veggies, etc. You don't have to change everything at once. Just small steps like trying to get in more steps every day can make a difference. This can be less overwhelming than trying to change everything at once. There are a lot of people here who are making it work, and you can do it too!
  • amyfliesalot
    amyfliesalot Posts: 51 Member
    Oh, to be 30 again...

    Caitlin, today is the first day of the rest of your life! You sound much like me, so I'll do my best to support and advise you like I would have done for the 30 year-old me if I could have seen into the future.

    I've been really lazy for a lot of years, and am the Queen of Justification, so I have a lot of "reasons" why I'm fat. Still fat, actually. But I'm highly motivated now, because I have a family beach vacation coming up the first week of July. I want to be able to play on the beach with all the kids, and not be freaking out over wearing a swimsuit and the thousands of pictures I know will be taken.

    So let's do this together!
  • lynheff
    lynheff Posts: 393 Member
    Are you sayiing you define success as "I am unhappy with my weight but I didn't fail to lose weight since I didn't try"? I'm not sure how that will make you feel better. It mlight help you mentally to set smaller, more doable goals and define success as--for example-- losing 1 pound a month. Sadly this old lady can tell you from experience that it is a never ending battle and you will have days of success and days of failure. Good luck!
  • DarkAngel262
    DarkAngel262 Posts: 118 Member
    I see you lost 11lbs already which is a great start! I too am turning 30 this year and I want to give myself the gift of health and loving my body again. I'm only on day three but I logged in to MFP, my diary is super clean, and I'm seeing a trainer on top of regular work outs. We have to MAKE it happen!!!
  • sjmitchner
    sjmitchner Posts: 121 Member
    Hey,
    I totally get it. I turned 30 in September. I did lots of crying the 2 weeks before. I can honestly say I have struggled with staying committed. I just finished a blog entry about what I figured out, and what I'm trying to do to fix it. I think the most important thing (IMO) is to figure out what is holding you back. The difference is between wanting to change and being ready to change. But then I'm just beginning again so maybe I'm off base. Regardless feel free to add me if you want.
  • taunto
    taunto Posts: 6,420 Member
    Hey Cait.

    Congratulations on making the big step of deciding to make a change. I know all about the feeling about failures. The only that would help is that you can't be afraid of your failures. You HAVE to accept that failures are a part of life. You NEED to learn from your failures.

    Ask anyone on this site who's been successful. Almost all of them will say that they failed once (many more than once). I mean you're making a huge change in your life, you're leaving old habit, your body and mind will resent that.

    The only thing I can suggest is, just keep on logging. No matter if you succeed or fail. Keep on logging please. Try to surround yourself with supportive friends on MFP. These 2 are my keys of staying on this site for long enough to see a change my body. Even though I still have lots of work to do on my body, I am at least making progress and for that, my friends and my persistence are what will help me.

    Good luck in your adventures :)
  • I can SO relate. In fact tomorrow is my first weigh in day and I am so nervous I should have gone to sleep half an hour ago, but I am too twitchy!!
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,996 Member
    Say you shoot for a 10lbs loss and get 8lbs only. You failed, but how bad was it?

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 28+ years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • DeeDel32
    DeeDel32 Posts: 542 Member
    You just need to do it.

    The time will pass anyways. May as well use it productively.
  • dianalee9
    dianalee9 Posts: 134 Member
    "You've got to say: If I keep working at this and want it badly enough...I can have it. It's called perserverance." ~Lee Iacocca~
  • Erin_goBrahScience
    Erin_goBrahScience Posts: 1,215 Member
    Everyone has to start somewhere. It's a long road, and you just have to decide to take the first step and then the next. Pick one good thing to do for yourself today, then tomorrow try to do the same and add on. Be it talking a walk, or passing on something you know you shouldn't partake in.

    When you are really ready...you will take the necessary steps. But don't wait to start because you don't know where to start.

    What can you do today? Do you want to workout? If so what is stopping you?

    Do you want to eat better? What is stopping you?

    You can always find an excuse to not do something, what is stopping you from doing what you want to do?
  • 4mydogs
    4mydogs Posts: 66 Member
    I think you need to really think about what you want to do here, write some weekly attainable goals and then just do it. No offense, but you have stated you kind of post and log here but you are afraid of failure? Fully engage in your goal and you won't fail.
  • caitlindrew422
    caitlindrew422 Posts: 109 Member
    Thank you all so much for your inspiration...I started logging again today. That will be my first step who knows what the next step will be but as long as I'm trying i'm not failing, it's a start! Thank you all again!
  • Reubinski
    Reubinski Posts: 37 Member


    The only thing I can suggest is, just keep on logging. No matter if you succeed or fail. Keep on logging please. Try to surround yourself with supportive friends on MFP. These 2 are my keys of staying on this site for long enough to see a change my body. Even though I still have lots of work to do on my body, I am at least making progress and for that, my friends and my persistence are what will help me.

    Good luck in your adventures :)

    Right here is what is really helping me. Logging every day (even the "cheat" days) and being motivated and inspired by my friends here on MFP. It is a long-term thing so be patient and stay with it! Good luck! :)
  • deksgrl
    deksgrl Posts: 7,237 Member
    Log every day, even on the bad days. Don't let the bad days discourage you but rather let them encourage you to do better tomorrow. As someone else suggested, start making small changes, cut back on the unhealthy things and add more healthy things. Again, don't quit or beat yourself up when you have a bad day, just keep moving on. Do some exercise every day, even if it is only a 20 minute walk.

    As I became more consistent, the changes started to become more part of my daily life. It gets easier, I promise!
  • sarahrbraun
    sarahrbraun Posts: 2,261 Member
    Hey everyone. It's a new year meaning new starts and of course resolutions. This year I opted not to make a resolution, just be more productive. I want to loose weight...I need to loose weight...but I just don't know where to start. I have tried so many things....I have even tracked here on and off but something alway comes up and just like that i'm off track. Now I'm afraid to even try again because I'm just like "what is going to be different this time than all the other times". I am going to be 30 this year, it's a big one and I would just like to have accomplished one of my life goals by then but I'm having a hard time getting going. I need help..I don't know what to do, just tired of failing.

    How about making your 'goal' to make positive changes in your life? Last year I told hubby that if he FINALLY got me a YMCA membership, I WOULD use it. I knew that I HAD to go first thing in the morning, or it would not happen. So I pushed myself to go to the gym 3-4x a week. I haven't lost as much weight as I wanted to, but I have been consistently going. My body IS changing.
  • Don't try to do everything all at once, and don't expect to be supermodel skinny in a month. that's really all I can tell ya :3