I am sorry if I have no picture
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This is actually my second time around. I was on this site for over a year and, since I've been back, I never found so many people ready to be mean for no reason. I actually don't really keep up with who accepts me and who doesn't but I do know that no one on my FL would choose to be mean just for the sake of being mean.
It didn't seem like the OP said anyone was being mean? Just that they thought that lacking a picture may be why they had denied friend requests?
You've made two posts in this thread about your anger at people in the forums. Perhaps that would be better suited in a blog post, and not in hijacking OP's thread? That, and having two accounts, is technically against forum rules...
Does seem like some serious bitterness is seeping out from a couple peeps. Really - cliques and those who you may consider as "divas" or "mean" has nothing to do with this post. It shouldn't have even been said to be honest. You want to talk about negativity - you just pushed your assumptions right out there didn't you. For all we know, the people the OP has sent friend requests too might not be accepting those they don't know in RL, might not be looking for any more friends, may be wanting a message with FR and didn't get it...etc. There are a lot of other reasons than just people being "mean".
But anyways. BACK to the topic... OP - I would do like taunto suggested and maybe upload a funny pict or a goal pict, etc. See if that helps. And when you do your FRs - make sure to add a courtesy message with a hello and why you are adding...0 -
All i got to say is you have not been seeking the right kind of people. you need motivators and people that will help you stay on track. feel free to add me and i have many on my friends list that would love to help you on your way to your goal. i feel that you can eat what you want it is not my buisness. i will not critisize i may have a question once in a while but my goal is to be motivatede and help motivate others. we all have off days and can use a hefty dose of inspiration and thats what my friends and i do for eachother.
ok so congrats on getting started at mfp and hope you dont let others get you down. God Bless.
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Being angry and pi$$y to other members is no way to be.
Try to enjoy your Journey. :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:0 -
I mean, having thousands of people with the same default blue profile pic gets confusing
Good luck
This is the best reason I've seen to post a picture. No picture makes it harder for you to stick in people's minds because there is nothing in the picture to bind them there. I don't post pictures of myself, either.
It's obviously not a requirement, though. Good luck to you!0 -
. You wouldn't want to be in their clique anyway.
^^This^^ has become all to clear lately. If I ever start acting like a diva just because I lost a bunch of weight, please someone kick me.
Name names0 -
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Believe it or not, this is not an actual current picture of me, yet I have all the friends I need. Trust me OP, just post something.
And please know that people will turn down PAL requests for all sorts of reasons, including not having a picture uploaded.0 -
I have noticed people being rude both ways, both on and off this particular topic.
In all reality, we are all here to answer/ask questions, support, motivate, and become healthier versions of ourselves. The people here who have already lost weight and have been here a while have no business being rude to someone just because they're here. If they're being "know-it-alls", here's a thought: Don't talk to them! And the newbies have no business being rude to the older members without actions to base an opinion on, and if that opinion is in anyway negative, I say again: Don't talk to them!
Most people state on their profile what their "conditions" are for adding people. I personally don't have any conditions, I will almost always accept and if I find I don't like you or how you're doing things, then I'll delete.
We all need motivation and support here. The negativity can be extremely harmful to success... which is what we all want, right?0 -
Being angry and pi$$y to other members is no way to be.
Try to enjoy your Journey. :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
I stopped believin' years ago.
Boy I bet Steve Perry is pissed....
:sad:0 -
I have sent friend requests and not had an acceptance. Yes some have and I appreciate the ones who have. But I have no idea how to do it and I really don't think it is that important. But my purpose of being here is to lose weight and this place does do that for me. And if I can help some one else that is even better. But I can't do it by myself and I don't get a lot of support at home and that is why I have reached out here for help. So if anyone wants to add me I would appreciate it. But I have no picture
Friend request sent.0 -
I am a newbie - I don't know how to send friend requests, but if you send me one, I will gladly accept. We all need the support on our journey!0
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This is actually my second time around. I was on this site for over a year and, since I've been back, I never found so many people ready to be mean for no reason. I actually don't really keep up with who accepts me and who doesn't but I do know that no one on my FL would choose to be mean just for the sake of being mean.
ironic post is ironic0 -
On a serious note, if you want something you have to give something. All i ask is that people have some sort of personality. It would be nice if they had a similar sense of humor, goals, or routine, but that's not a requirement. But if you have no pic, no profile info, and send a no-message FR, what are you offering me? I can't really identify you on my wall and have no idea why you think we'd be a good fit or what you expect from me.
I don't need your life story or to see pictures of your intimate family moments, but can you offer something, anything, that differentiates you from a stick of wood? Does that make me stuck up?0 -
. You wouldn't want to be in their clique anyway.
^^This^^ has become all to clear lately. If I ever start acting like a diva just because I lost a bunch of weight, please someone kick me.
no Cliques here...
just people who have all lost the weight together and support each other and as a result their banding together in the last 4, 6, 8 or 12 months has created the illusion of a clique.
trust me, if you stick with this site, REALLY stick with it...and create a network of supportive people within this site, THOSE people will be the ones you joke with in the forums, the ones you stick up for, the ones you cry on their shoulders, and the ones that stick up for you....
THAT is the only reason why they seem like cliques, because they've BEEN there and been cheering each other on for the past several months...
you will develop your own "clique" over time...a group of people that really help you stick to it through thick and thin, good and bad...
and that's a good thing....
perhaps you have found yourself bitter because you have not managed to find that level of camaraderie and support that several other members have managed to find.
I am sorry for that, but to gain it, you have to put it out there...and this anger and bitterness you are showing will make others reluctant to try.....
true story.
also, often, "meanness and rudeness" that people feel they see in the in forums is not that at all, but simply a matter of people laying things out in the simplest, shortest terms possible.
eat less, train more, try harder...
sometimes small sentences carry a bigger punch....
and yet are interpreted as hateful, mean or hurtful.
it's never intended that way.
OP, a picture would help....like others suggested, even if it's a motivational poster, or a picture of what you want to be, or a picture of a hobby or pet or something. It does NOT have to be you....but something that does show you are invested in this place, really trying and working towards being supprted and being supportive....
that would help.0 -
This is actually my second time around. I was on this site for over a year and, since I've been back, I never found so many people ready to be mean for no reason. I actually don't really keep up with who accepts me and who doesn't but I do know that no one on my FL would choose to be mean just for the sake of being mean.
Wow, that's EXACTLY the way I've been feeling since I came back last week after about a 2 year absence. I can't believe how downright cruel some of the members are with their comments! And when I said something like that in a post, agreeing with a few others who felt the same way, I got slammed too!
It's too bad some people have to be like that!
I DO know that MFP works, since I'd reached my goal once before. And now that my knees have both been replaced and I can exercise again, I'm back to hopefully AGAIN reach my goal!0 -
. You wouldn't want to be in their clique anyway.
^^This^^ has become all to clear lately. If I ever start acting like a diva just because I lost a bunch of weight, please someone kick me.
no Cliques here...
just people who have all lost the weight together and support each other and as a result their banding together in the last 4, 6, 8 or 12 months has created the illusion of a clique.
trust me, if you stick with this site, REALLY stick with it...and create a network of supportive people within this site, THOSE people will be the ones you joke with in the forums, the ones you stick up for, the ones you cry on their shoulders, and the ones that stick up for you....
THAT is the only reason why they seem like cliques, because they've BEEN there and been cheering each other on for the past several months...
you will develop your own "clique" over time...a group of people that really help you stick to it through thick and thin, good and bad...
and that's a good thing....
perhaps you have found yourself bitter because you have not managed to find that level of camaraderie and support that several other members have managed to find.
I am sorry for that, but to gain it, you have to put it out there...and this anger and bitterness you are showing will make others reluctant to try.....
true story.
also, often, "meanness and rudeness" that people feel they see in the in forums is not that at all, but simply a matter of people laying things out in the simplest, shortest terms possible.
eat less, train more, try harder...
sometimes small sentences carry a bigger punch....
and yet are interpreted as hateful, mean or hurtful.
it's never intended that way.
OP, a picture would help....like others suggested, even if it's a motivational poster, or a picture of what you want to be, or a picture of a hobby or pet or something. It does NOT have to be you....but something that does show you are invested in this place, really trying and working towards being supprted and being supportive....
that would help.
^ This x10000000.0 -
On a serious note, if you want something you have to give something. All i ask is that people have some sort of personality. It would be nice if they had a similar sense of humor, goals, or routine, but that's not a requirement. But if you have no pic, no profile info, and send a no-message FR, what are you offering me? I can't really identify you on my wall and have no idea why you think we'd be a good fit or what you expect from me.
I don't need your life story or to see pictures of your intimate family moments, but can you offer something, anything, that differentiates you from a stick of wood? Does that make me stuck up?
Dav she does have some information in her profile!0 -
I try to stay out of cliques on here. You will notice members on here acting like the regulars at a gym when the New Year comes. They hate all the newbies giving it a shot. Yes, lots will drop off but some won't. You never know. Just remember that its the internet and even though you do not know these people they will still form cliques and post things that simply irk the HECK out of you! Its how it goes. But trust me, you will find a good group that motivates you and you mesh well with, you just need to keep looking. Good luck to you for trying something new and I wish you the best of luck on your journey...picture or not!
Yes, all of the regulars on the site hate newbies giving it a shot. You've got EVERY single one of us all figured out.
The group of people I associate the most with on this site are some of the most supportive, motivating, and knowledgable people I've ever had the pleasure of "meeting."
They have snark and find humor in posting but they also are constantly posting extremely helpful advice on the forums.0 -
. You wouldn't want to be in their clique anyway.
^^This^^ has become all to clear lately. If I ever start acting like a diva just because I lost a bunch of weight, please someone kick me.
no Cliques here...
just people who have all lost the weight together and support each other and as a result their banding together in the last 4, 6, 8 or 12 months has created the illusion of a clique.
trust me, if you stick with this site, REALLY stick with it...and create a network of supportive people within this site, THOSE people will be the ones you joke with in the forums, the ones you stick up for, the ones you cry on their shoulders, and the ones that stick up for you....
THAT is the only reason why they seem like cliques, because they've BEEN there and been cheering each other on for the past several months...
you will develop your own "clique" over time...a group of people that really help you stick to it through thick and thin, good and bad...
and that's a good thing....
perhaps you have found yourself bitter because you have not managed to find that level of camaraderie and support that several other members have managed to find.
I am sorry for that, but to gain it, you have to put it out there...and this anger and bitterness you are showing will make others reluctant to try.....
true story.
also, often, "meanness and rudeness" that people feel they see in the in forums is not that at all, but simply a matter of people laying things out in the simplest, shortest terms possible.
eat less, train more, try harder...
sometimes small sentences carry a bigger punch....
and yet are interpreted as hateful, mean or hurtful.
it's never intended that way.
OP, a picture would help....like others suggested, even if it's a motivational poster, or a picture of what you want to be, or a picture of a hobby or pet or something. It does NOT have to be you....but something that does show you are invested in this place, really trying and working towards being supprted and being supportive....
that would help.
can we be friends :blushing:0 -
Feel free to add Cadaya! Pic or not.0
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Look you have to share some of yourself if you want to connect with people. I posted some advice about this the other day but it was largely ignored, so in a very passive aggressive way, I'm putting the link here:
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/839160-if-you-want-this-to-work?hl=if+you+want+this+to+work#posts-126007540 -
my only requirement AFTER i accept your friend request is that you are serious and log in daily. or dont make it so that my thread says so and so has not logged in for _ days. those drive me crazy.
I HAVE AN AMAZING FREIND LIST.. I know personally maybe 5 of them max. The rest of my crew are all people I met by posting in the threads or friends of friends. Having a great support system here is the best thing you can get...
I dont care if you dont have a pic, I do prefer it because then i remember that pic and screen name and for some reason makes me feel better. HAHAHA..
I have a few people that will not put a pic of themselves so they do their favorite sport team, or beaches etc... I dont want to know your life story but I do like to get a message of how you found me..
plus when you know a little more about your peeps it helps relate to their struggles.... My friends know everything about me.. I am a pretty open person. Some might delete me after because I am pretty forward and honest..
this is my page and my journey you can be a part or it or not... if not, no biggie life will go on.0 -
On a serious note, if you want something you have to give something. All i ask is that people have some sort of personality. It would be nice if they had a similar sense of humor, goals, or routine, but that's not a requirement. But if you have no pic, no profile info, and send a no-message FR, what are you offering me? I can't really identify you on my wall and have no idea why you think we'd be a good fit or what you expect from me.
I don't need your life story or to see pictures of your intimate family moments, but can you offer something, anything, that differentiates you from a stick of wood? Does that make me stuck up?
This. I can be pretty open, TMI, TL;DR, what have you on my page, and it just creeps me eff out if I have faceless, completely empty and locked profiles reading all my fingertip diarrhea. I need to picture your face getting annoyed or angry or grossed out at all of my inappropriate status postings.0 -
blah blah blah STEVE PERRY blah blah blah.....
Sorry to the original poster....but Steve is looking gooood in that old clip. Thx Teddie.0 -
I try to stay out of cliques on here. You will notice members on here acting like the regulars at a gym when the New Year comes. They hate all the newbies giving it a shot.
I hear what you're saying, but you've got it backwards. No one hates the newbies giving it a shot. Just the opposite. I want you here. IRL, i try to convince everyone i know to join. Why? Because MFP works. I made my goal weight months ago. I'm still here because i want you to reach yours.
What you're seeing as meanness is a group of people trying very hard to steer newcomers into a direction of diet and fitness that actually works. And it's hard. There is so much misinformation out there that knocking it down in the forums is like playing a never ending game of whack a mole. To fight the region there are jokes and some trolling, but no lies, no bull$hit quick fixes, and no risky meal plans. Sorry if we're not nice when telling someone that a stupid plan is stupid.
Maybe I'm crazy, but I'd rather get advice from a sharp tongued successful diva than someone who keeps quitting and returning and has never reached their goal.0 -
If this is OP's idea of "Introduce Yourself", maybe lack of photo isn't the reason for the decline.
I suppose this post is in response to something that happened here, but everyone isn't privy to that information. Everyone has probably had a request declined at some point, and you really cannot control who takes a shine to you. How you handle it is entirely up to you.
Good luck.0 -
Or it just MIGHT be because some people have reached their friend limit and feel overwhelmed? I personally very rarely accept friend requests because if my friend list continues to grow, I won't be able to interact with my current friends as I do and they would be neglected. How is that fair to the people that I actually really consider friends?. You wouldn't want to be in their clique anyway.
^^This^^ has become all to clear lately. If I ever start acting like a diva just because I lost a bunch of weight, please someone kick me.
Edit: To the original point. Whether someone has a profile picture or not has absolutely no bearing on whether I accept their friend request. If I have something in common with someone and they are someone I'd like to get to know, I'd accept regardless of profile picture.0 -
Well I gathered all the courage I could muster, and believe me, I had to do that. I am technologically imbalnced and I added a picture of my cat.0
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Well I gathered all the courage I could muster, and believe me, I had to do that. I am technologically imbalnced and I added a picture of my cat.
Awwww..your cat is adorable
And glad you were able to do it I would have added a walk through if I'd known you didn't know how. 
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Well I gathered all the courage I could muster, and believe me, I had to do that. I am technologically imbalnced and I added a picture of my cat.
beautiful cat!!
see? You've got this!0
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