GRRRR...I've got a rant....
leavinglasvegas
Posts: 1,495
First let me start by stating my situation so nobody thinks I'm flying off about something I know nothing about.
I'm a single-mom. No child support, no welfare, no boyfriend paying my bills for me. Just me alone. At the moment I'm a full-time student and getting unemployment compensation. I'm considered at more 100% below the poverty level by the state of Michigan. (I don't know what they determine as poverty, but whatever, I make it by the skin of my teeth every month.) I'm very busy. I have things to do everyday, all day just like anyone else.
Everyday I hear someone whining about how hard it is to eat healthy. I'm not specifically talking about anyone on here. Its someone in my family, a friend, a comment online, a parent at my kids school, blah, blah, blah. I hear all of these excuses and people like to tell me how my life would be easier if I shopped at Wal-mart or they say I'm too into health.
Meanwhile, these people tend to have constant sickness. The kids always have runny noses and hacking coughs. The complainers are obese, scarfing down a Big Mac and diet soda while they complain that they can't lose weight. They tell me they have to have all those cable channels so they can keep up with all their shows. Nobody will go out with my daughter and I because they can't "afford" to go out. Nobody wants to eat at my house because they assume that my healthy foods are flavorless. I hear non-stop complaining about how hard it is to lose weight because someone can't give up their favorite foods.
I used to think, well it is a hard transition to make. But lately, I feel like just screaming! OMG, get off the dang couch and take a walk with your kids! Manwich is NOT a full serving of veggies just cuz the can says so! You can actually get a full serving of veggies for cheaper than the can of stupid manwich! Your life will go on even with out the stupid reality shows about people's lives who aren't actually real! Take a few moments to budget your 2 incomes and make it work for you! Don't freakin' whine to me, you have more than I do and I DO NOT have any sympathy for you!
I get by on less than $200 a month for food. I can buy a weeks worth of groceries for $30! None of that is tv dinners or canned entrees and I don't have to shop at Wal-mart! I choose healthy food over cable, designer purses, and a gym membership that I never use. I don't rely on a drive-thru. I hold myself accountable for my mistakes. I don't deny myself of anything. I budget my money. I clip cupons and I'm not ashamed to use them. I cook my own food. I educate myself on what is in my food and I focus on my well-being. Dance and Karate classes are expensive, but it keeps my kid from plopping down with a bag of cheetos in front of the TV, so its worth every penny. Again, I budget my money to make it work FOR me.
Everything I do involves work, determination, and a touch of common sense. I have problems, I indulge in junk, I fall off the wagon, I have lazy days, I even have health problems, and I'm far from perfect. But I refuse to believe that living a healthy life is so costly. If I can manage this type of lifestyle, then I find it very hard to believe that a 2 income family cannot.
It is not my intention to judge anyone. I'm just so tired of the excuses and complaining and judgements aimed at me! (OR US!) I guess I'm realizing that I need to seriously consider changing my surroundings. I have to just end conversations when they take on this direction because it always end up with someone thinking I'm preaching. If someone says "its too expensive" and I say, I do it pretty cheap, that tends to set someone off. I NEVER start to topic. I avoid it like the plague! People seem to want to bring it up and insult my lifestyle then get defensive when I politely defend myself. Its not my fault anyone else is miserable.
Thanks for listening.
Holly
I'm a single-mom. No child support, no welfare, no boyfriend paying my bills for me. Just me alone. At the moment I'm a full-time student and getting unemployment compensation. I'm considered at more 100% below the poverty level by the state of Michigan. (I don't know what they determine as poverty, but whatever, I make it by the skin of my teeth every month.) I'm very busy. I have things to do everyday, all day just like anyone else.
Everyday I hear someone whining about how hard it is to eat healthy. I'm not specifically talking about anyone on here. Its someone in my family, a friend, a comment online, a parent at my kids school, blah, blah, blah. I hear all of these excuses and people like to tell me how my life would be easier if I shopped at Wal-mart or they say I'm too into health.
Meanwhile, these people tend to have constant sickness. The kids always have runny noses and hacking coughs. The complainers are obese, scarfing down a Big Mac and diet soda while they complain that they can't lose weight. They tell me they have to have all those cable channels so they can keep up with all their shows. Nobody will go out with my daughter and I because they can't "afford" to go out. Nobody wants to eat at my house because they assume that my healthy foods are flavorless. I hear non-stop complaining about how hard it is to lose weight because someone can't give up their favorite foods.
I used to think, well it is a hard transition to make. But lately, I feel like just screaming! OMG, get off the dang couch and take a walk with your kids! Manwich is NOT a full serving of veggies just cuz the can says so! You can actually get a full serving of veggies for cheaper than the can of stupid manwich! Your life will go on even with out the stupid reality shows about people's lives who aren't actually real! Take a few moments to budget your 2 incomes and make it work for you! Don't freakin' whine to me, you have more than I do and I DO NOT have any sympathy for you!
I get by on less than $200 a month for food. I can buy a weeks worth of groceries for $30! None of that is tv dinners or canned entrees and I don't have to shop at Wal-mart! I choose healthy food over cable, designer purses, and a gym membership that I never use. I don't rely on a drive-thru. I hold myself accountable for my mistakes. I don't deny myself of anything. I budget my money. I clip cupons and I'm not ashamed to use them. I cook my own food. I educate myself on what is in my food and I focus on my well-being. Dance and Karate classes are expensive, but it keeps my kid from plopping down with a bag of cheetos in front of the TV, so its worth every penny. Again, I budget my money to make it work FOR me.
Everything I do involves work, determination, and a touch of common sense. I have problems, I indulge in junk, I fall off the wagon, I have lazy days, I even have health problems, and I'm far from perfect. But I refuse to believe that living a healthy life is so costly. If I can manage this type of lifestyle, then I find it very hard to believe that a 2 income family cannot.
It is not my intention to judge anyone. I'm just so tired of the excuses and complaining and judgements aimed at me! (OR US!) I guess I'm realizing that I need to seriously consider changing my surroundings. I have to just end conversations when they take on this direction because it always end up with someone thinking I'm preaching. If someone says "its too expensive" and I say, I do it pretty cheap, that tends to set someone off. I NEVER start to topic. I avoid it like the plague! People seem to want to bring it up and insult my lifestyle then get defensive when I politely defend myself. Its not my fault anyone else is miserable.
Thanks for listening.
Holly
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Replies
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I've got to say *great job* on getting a weeks worth of groceries for $30!
I'm in Canada..and I couldn't do that!0 -
People ALWAYS look for excuses to not do what they should be doing...sometimes that takes the form of "I can't afford it..." My question is how can you afford NOT to be healthy. Think big picture folks...healthcare costs in the long term aren't anything to pretend don't exist. Good for you for posting this :happy:0
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I say Congrats to you for choosing to make the right decisions for yourself and your family to live a healthy active lifestyle.
You should be very proud of what you are doing all on your own, rather than complaining and blaming your lot in life on others.
As for other people, you can't change them, and you should definitely not let them change you.0 -
Being vegetarian helps the pocketbook quite a bit. But people even seem to think being vegetarian is too expensive.0
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i know somewhat how you feel. i am married and have a kid, but we're a single income family. we don't have cable, we have cars that work and are paid off (although nothing to look at twice), we bought a modest home, and we eat healthy and at home (almost) always. many of our friends earn twice what we do and always complain that they're broke. well, they bought a house they can't really afford, drive very nice, very expensive cars, have the highest cell phone and cable packages and eat out constantly. many of them are also very overweight and constantly sick and always have back problems. gee, wonder why you're sick and broke!!! sometimes i feel like people look down on us for living such a simple lifestyle, but i think we're the rich ones because we live within our means and we take care of our health. you go girl. rock on with your bad self and know that you are doing the right thing! in the long run, the extra money (even though i agree it's actually cheaper) you spend on a healthy lifestyle will pay you back ten fold when you don't have to pay for the medical care that always goes hand in hand with an UNhealthy lifestyle.0
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Sounds like you are surrounded by sabotagers!! Hang in there & keep up the good work! So many people aren't happy unless everyone around them is miserable too! You should be very proud of yourself for what you are accomplishing! Don't let them bring you down!
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I want a hug! You've hit everything right on the head! I'm with you, I'm not a single mother, but I was staying at home for a time with my daughter, and we were making it just fine on one income... and baby's sure aren't cheap these days (we also were getting no state help)
I cook all of our foods, even make our own bread crumbs, will be starting to make our own dried herbs etc. If I had the time I would make our own bread (which really my husband only eats, and so sparingly we keep it in the freezer)
My husband recently joined MFP to gain weight (damn skinny minny, his whole family was blessed with the metabolism of the gods
)
I am with you 100% and I admire your strength, motivation and determination. It's women like you who raise strong, brilliant children.0 -
Amen Sister!! 0
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I agree with you 100% and you are doing great. :flowerforyou:0
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i know somewhat how you feel. i am married and have a kid, but we're a single income family. we don't have cable, we have cars that work and are paid off (although nothing to look at twice), we bought a modest home, and we eat healthy and at home (almost) always. many of our friends earn twice what we do and always complain that they're broke. well, they bought a house they can't really afford, drive very nice, very expensive cars, have the highest cell phone and cable packages and eat out constantly. many of them are also very overweight and constantly sick and always have back problems. gee, wonder why you're sick and broke!!! sometimes i feel like people look down on us for living such a simple lifestyle, but i think we're the rich ones because we live within our means and we take care of our health. you go girl. rock on with your bad self and know that you are doing the right thing! in the long run, the extra money (even though i agree it's actually cheaper) you spend on a healthy lifestyle will pay you back ten fold when you don't have to pay for the medical care that always goes hand in hand with an UNhealthy lifestyle.
Your friends are living the typical "American Dream" unfortunately it's sucked so many people in and is so distorted from it's original meaning. I think everyone should start living the "simplier life" Everyone would see the beauty in the little things and be much happier.0 -
Hey, I know what you mean about a 1 income family. We have 4 mouths to feed in my house, and it's all from my hubbys income, which is not alot at all. I spend a whole lot on groceries, getting better at it, for feeding myself anyways. My hubby is a meat and potatoes guy, and my 2 girls eat just about anything I cook. One thing I can say, I cook almost every single day, unless it's friday and it's pizza day in my house. I think it's hard for me, just because I am eating healthier, which means that I feel everyone in the house shouldn't have to eat what I eat. I usually end up making a meal for them, and something else for me. My girls are young, and they don't do salads, or tuna!!! lol I hear ya tho, because it annoys me when I hear my single friends talk about how broke they are....and I am like, you dont have to feed a family of 4 on one income. I always tell my one friend, talk to me when you have kids to feed, then tell me how broke you are!!!! lol0
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Way to go Holly!
I know how you feel...my hubby is out of work and it's only my income supporting all three of us and our three dogs. I still manage to pay the bills (mortgage, car, utilities, gas, insurance, daughters ballet, eat pretty clean and vegetarian). I get tired of hearing it as well...but it's their fault for being in the position they are in. It's what you do with your resources and time that makes a difference in the long run. :flowerforyou:0 -
Good for you, Holly!! You should be so proud of yourself for making your income work for you and providing yourself and your child with what really matters in life. Don't listen to those complainers! They don't deserve even a second of your time.0
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I enjoyed your "rant!" I too always hear the excuses from family members about losing weight... like the other day i hear someone say "i'm back up to 215. I might as well quit." this is the very person who complains they can't lose weight when they bring home doritos, ice cream, nutty bars or donuts from the store... its like "and you wonder why you don't see results?!"
They give me reasons like "i'm too old," or "i can't do that stuff anymore" and its like... "You're right you can't because you won't." They have this defeated attitude before they even start. I am one of those people who believes in accountability and changing things in your life that you don't like instead of complaining about it. Like that saying goes "if you think you can or you think you can't, you are probably right." The body conforms to the thoughts and feelings you have in your head... you gotta change the inside before you can change the outside.0 -
Awesome post! 100% correct too! Hang in there! Remember, sometimes people attack the very thing they have guilt about in themselves. So, easier to attack you and your lifestyle than to have to admit that they are being lazy!
Your kids are learning alot about life from you, and it will stick, all your hard work and choices now for their benefit and yours will come back as they get older and do the same things for their families.
Great job!! :flowerforyou:0 -
AHHHH HAAAAAAAAAAAAAa!!!
Yessss, you tell it like it is sister!!
I love rants like that, makes me feel less crazy, I say that same crap once a week....0 -
Well, as single mother with little help, too, I have to say I think you are doing a PHENOMENAL job! Don't ever let ANYONE bring you down....we all have switches. The people you are ranting about-they have a switch that makes them complain when someone mentions actually doing some work. Other people, they have a switch to justify EVERYTHING they do and NOTHING you do. You, my dear, have a switch to STAY STRONG, STAY FOCUSED, maintain a GREAT BUDGET, raise health conscious kids! GOOD FOR YOU!!
But I think you forgot about the most important switch of all-and YES, you do have one...
Its the switch that turns down the volume on what these people b*tch about so that it is NEVER louder than your own thoughts...and Sometimes, when it becomes overbearing, you can even switch to MUTE! Imagine that; isnt that amazing???? I know! I was stoked when someone told me I had THAT switch! *wink*
You are doing just fine, so much better than fine, actually. Just keep doing it. Your success will be your validation!0 -
YOu sound like you are doing an AMAZING job!!! I've heard people say that eating "healthy is expensive"... never made much sense to me either... I do shop at Wal-Mart :laugh: But I use common sense when making selections ... I have started.... wait for it... here it comes.....really profound.... READING LABELS!! GASP!!! :laugh:
I say WAY TO GO!!! Keep at it!! You're setting a wonderful example for your kiddos and even those around you that annoy the *kitten* out of you!! :drinker:0 -
I agree and even when I am paying more for something like I buy the 99% fat free turkey 1.5 pounds for $7.00 but I cut it in half and it is two meals for four people, and I portion everything now, oh how long things last when you're not consuming it all in one sitting.0
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It's a shame that the food industry jumps on the healthy kick bye overcharging us disproportionately for what little extra care goes into producing healthier food.
Like Gallagher said "Every where you leak, someone wants to hang a bucket."
It's like the local brewer is cleaning out the bottom of the vat. He used to have to pay to dispose of it, but decided to bottle it and call it Hefeweizen instead.0 -
Thank you MFP for having my back!
This is why I spend so much more time here with you, than there with them!0 -
Someone gave me the perfect response to those kind of winers the other day. "Oh, that's too bad." That's it. Nothing else. Just repeat. I laughed! It IS more expensive to eat healthier. But, really, when you factor in the cost of medication for high blood pressure, diabetes and all manner of other illnesses obesity contributes to, it comes out a LOT cheaper in the end!
Holly - you are doing a phenominal job! Keep up the great work - you rock. Your kid(s) will thank you in the future for teaching them true priorities and for providing a great childhood. Way to go!0 -
I just love you guys!!!!
:happy: :bigsmile: 0 -
I want a hug! You've hit everything right on the head! I'm with you, I'm not a single mother, but I was staying at home for a time with my daughter, and we were making it just fine on one income... and baby's sure aren't cheap these days (we also were getting no state help)
I cook all of our foods, even make our own bread crumbs, will be starting to make our own dried herbs etc. If I had the time I would make our own bread (which really my husband only eats, and so sparingly we keep it in the freezer)
My husband recently joined MFP to gain weight (damn skinny minny, his whole family was blessed with the metabolism of the gods )
I am with you 100% and I admire your strength, motivation and determination. It's women like you who raise strong, brilliant children.
:flowerforyou: {[HUGS]}:flowerforyou:0 -
I agree and even when I am paying more for something like I buy the 99% fat free turkey 1.5 pounds for $7.00 but I cut it in half and it is two meals for four people, and I portion everything now, oh how long things last when you're not consuming it all in one sitting.
Exactly! Thats one of the disagreements I ran into recently. My box of Vegan cookies were 3.50, but I only eat 2 at a time. The other person was complaining that they can't stop at 2 cookies. All I could do is shake my head. Really? Maybe it needs to start with a little self control, not cheaper cookies.0 -
Sorry double post.0
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The other person was complaining that they can't stop at 2 cookies. All I could do is shake my head. Really? Maybe it needs to start with a little self control, not cheaper cookies.
HA! Hilarious! and soooo true!0 -
I've got to say *great job* on getting a weeks worth of groceries for $30!
I'm in Canada..and I couldn't do that!
Same.
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Holly, I need some grocery shopping advice. I'm on a very tight budget as well, and it seems every extra penny I have has to go for groceries. I'd love to see your weekly grocery shopping list.0
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Holly, I need some grocery shopping advice. I'm on a very tight budget as well, and it seems every extra penny I have has to go for groceries. I'd love to see your weekly grocery shopping list.
I have to clean my house right now and then get my daughter to karate and I also have a class later.
When I get home tonight I'll organize the way I make it work and I'll post it. I must say, not every week comes to 30, but I've made it work either way.
OK, I better get to cleaning so I can get on with it!0
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