any other ladies self concious in the weight room?

minimalist92
minimalist92 Posts: 11
in Fitness and Exercise
Are any other girls out there uncomfortable lifting, because you're the ONLY female in the weightroom?

At my gym, I'm always the only girl in the weight room and it makes me super uncomfortable. So I put off going, or stick to cardio where I'm more comfortable. I try to bring my boyfriend with me, but most of the time our schedules don't match up.

What have you done to get over this? Any tips?
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Replies

  • hannahamay
    hannahamay Posts: 77 Member
    I was incredibly uncomfortable the first few days I started going to the gym but not because I was the only girl, but because I was surrounded by very fit women who could lift and do more than me. I was intimidated but now I'm over it. Men don't worry me as much though for some reason, maybe because I don't feel like I have to compete? What made me get comfortable is talking with other people and asking them what work outs they do and what their diet is like. If you smile at them and mind your own business they shouldn't bother you. They aren't at the gym to judge you, they're going for them so that's what they focus on. Just remember that you may feel uncomfortable lifting now but in a few months you're going to be really good at it. :) Don't give up!
  • The_Saint
    The_Saint Posts: 358 Member
    Remember the reason you are there. Forget about who else is there, the only thing that should matter to you, stay focused. If a guy is using the equipment you intend to use. Just politely ask how much longer he intends to use it. Its important for women to lift and more important that they feel comfortable doing so.
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,329 Member
    just do it. the weight room isnt going to turn into a gang bang because 1 girl is in there. :laugh:

    most of the time they are ignoring you and doing their own workout ... or at least pretending to ignore you.

    stop standing in your own way and get the work done :wink:
  • Flixie00
    Flixie00 Posts: 1,195 Member
    Been using the weights room since last February, and I know exactly what you mean, they stare at you as if you are an alien. I am in my mid 40's and I don't dress in scimpy work out clothes, but I still find guys staring at me. Nowadays, these guys tend to be non regulars, as guys that are in my gym regularly have got used to me and are friendly and supportive.

    Don't let them put you off, they are just curious as they probably don't get many women in their territory, and they will soon get used to you being there.
  • username_misso
    username_misso Posts: 50 Member
    i used to be, but i got a personal trainer who showed me around the "big boy weights" and got me feeling comfortable with what i was doing. i would only barbell bench with him to spot me, and if i wanted to try an increased DB weight i would try it first with him so i knew i didnt have to worry about dropping it on my face when i was doing it on my own.

    im pretty lucky, now i train with a group of awesome super strong guys who just see me as another lifter, rather than as a "girl". i found that the ones that are more concerned with a "girl" being in the weights area are the insecure ones with something to prove, so now i just let my lifting speak for me :P

    ive got a fair idea what im doing now, so just go about my program. at first, i didnt know how to take guys at foreign gyms when they would offer to spot if i needed it - i wasnt sure if they were being helpful and friendly or just though i couldnt handle it, but popular opinion seems to favour the former so i got with it. if i need a hand i look for the guy lifting the biggest weights with the best form and ask, they are more than happy to help when they see someone making an effort.

    and if i cant work out how to adjust a new type of rack or something, a flutter of the eyelashes never fails ;)
  • FitFabFlirty92
    FitFabFlirty92 Posts: 384 Member
    I want an answer to this too, the idea of going into the weight room at my gym terrifies me. :(
  • AMYJK7110
    AMYJK7110 Posts: 126 Member
    I was always worried that I would look like a fool. Like I didn't know what I was doing. So I made a plan (stronglifts specifically), a workout I was going to do. I then took those exercises and youtubed them to see them demonstrated and what was needed to do them. I then practiced the form at home with no weights and had my husband or son watch me do them. I then walked into the weight section like a boss and did it! After a few times, I am def. braver and will ask for advice on form or spots if I need it.
  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
    Just go. Trust me, none of the guys care that you are there. We are not staring at you. We are not thinking bad things about you. We. Don't. Care.

    Just work out
  • DontStopB_Leakin
    DontStopB_Leakin Posts: 3,863 Member
    Just go. Trust me, none of the guys care that you are there. We are not staring at you. We are not thinking bad things about you. We. Don't. Care.

    Just work out
    ^This.

    And you know what? Even if the guys at your gym DO care, who cares? I mean honestly, women need to stop acting like the weight room has a "No Girls Allowed!" sign on it. Go in, do your thing, kick *kitten*, get out.

    Stop worrying about everyone else. You're not doing this for everyone else. You're doing it for you.
  • RedHeadDevotchka
    RedHeadDevotchka Posts: 1,394 Member
    If you have a plan and have a good idea of how to perform specific exercises then you will feel more confident and will have an easy time easing your way to the weight side. But it's going to feel weird, you will probably hate it for a bit and then you will begin to love it. Put on your big girl panties and get in there! :)
  • sarahstrezo
    sarahstrezo Posts: 568 Member
    Just go. Trust me, none of the guys care that you are there. We are not staring at you. We are not thinking bad things about you. We. Don't. Care.

    Just work out

    ^^^ This! Just go and do your workout. I'm pretty much the only woman in the weight room at my gym and I don't care. Nobody pays any attention to me that I am aware of. And if they are paying attention to me....I'm too busy to notice or care.
  • wrecktechno
    wrecktechno Posts: 145 Member
    I couldn't care less, in fact I prefer it when there are tonnes of guys in there. I feel good knowing that I know what I'm doing and having big muscley guys around makes me work harder to prove that I know what I'm doing.
  • millerll
    millerll Posts: 873 Member
    Yeah, I feel terribly self-conscious in the weight room. I hate making the guys look bad..................:devil:
  • aimeeernest
    aimeeernest Posts: 159 Member
    I actually don't mind it because then i feel so bad being so weak. lol. when giant guys are around you, you dont feel so bad for being a girl who can only press 30-100lbs. Haha! I'd feel more self conscious if I were around women in much better shape than me doing my entire workout as their warm-up. Guys don't bother me because I compare myself with women. I can focus better with less women. and I wear big t-shirts that hang below my butt so I'm not worried about them checking me out. hahaha
  • aimeeernest
    aimeeernest Posts: 159 Member
    Just go. Trust me, none of the guys care that you are there. We are not staring at you. We are not thinking bad things about you. We. Don't. Care.

    Just work out

    its funny i know this with men but i have to remind myself with women. I know I look at the women, especially the ones in perfect shape, like "i wanna know what they do here to look that fantastic. I wanna look like that someday!" but then i don't go looking at those heavier than me and think "man, they're not trying hard enough". if anything it encourages me to know that everyone starts somewhere and if you're at the gym then you're on the right track! :D
  • Tw1zzler
    Tw1zzler Posts: 583
    I used to feel that way but now I kind of like it. Less competition for equipment! Just keep at it and you will get more comfortable. Have a plan when you go. The guys are focused on their workout, not you.
  • bonniecarbs
    bonniecarbs Posts: 446 Member
    Are these people really staring at unfit people like they are aliens, for real? Do they really care that somebody who is not fit paid his or her money to use the gym that they had to pay for too? I'm being rough with my answer because I was the same way, looking around to see who was laughing at me, etc. and I was so angry with myself when I thought about it a little longer. So many people in the world everywhere you go - and you just cant segregate everywhere. What's that movie Arnold said - "get your *kitten* to mars" - well get your *kitten* to the gym and be proud of yourself.
  • Hezzietiger1
    Hezzietiger1 Posts: 1,256 Member
    Hire a trainer for a session or 2.u will learn tona and b way more confident. Plus, guys dont care if u r doing it right. Just remember ur doing it for u... no one else matters
  • AZKristi
    AZKristi Posts: 1,801 Member
    I had already been a member of my gym for a few years before venturing into the free weight area. The first few times I was intimidated, but after a while you start seeing the same people again and again. When they see that you are committed to lifting they will respect you.
  • jenndymond
    jenndymond Posts: 117 Member
    Go in with a solid plan for what your going to do. Put in your headphones and just do it.
  • Markguns
    Markguns Posts: 554 Member
    Know what your lifting regime is going to be, and get a trainer or your friend to get you acquainted with the equipment. Don't worry about the men, we just don't want you to make us look bad! :embarassed:
  • VeronicaAM
    VeronicaAM Posts: 69
    Yes and I do live in a very small town and I am not from here everybody stares big time and can affect my nerves most days I do cardio , to bad
  • smantha32
    smantha32 Posts: 6,990 Member
    I was a little worried about it so I joined a ladies only gym.
  • VeronicaAM
    VeronicaAM Posts: 69
    Some people stare bad and I am not strong enough to hit them with a barbell :angry:
  • tameko2
    tameko2 Posts: 31,634 Member
    Some people stare bad and I am not strong enough to hit them with a barbell :angry:

    So? Ignore them? What's the worst that can happen in this scenario, really? They're all thinking "who the hell is that? is she going into the weight room?" to which you answer "I'm veronica and yes I am".

    I was maybe a bit self conscious the first time but not anymore. And I actually prefer going alone (except that if I went alone my husband wouldn't do any exercise at all) because it takes less time and I can do exactly what I want, no more or less, without waiting for someone.

    But seriously ladies, what are you scared of in there? Are you afraid people are gonna look at you and judge you for lifting weights? Let them. The only person who's judgement matters is your own. Are you afraid someone's going to ask you what your'e doing back there? then TELL them - you've got a lifting plan right? Follow it. Don't let them intimidate you away from asking to use the rack when they're finished. Tell them no, they can't have those plates because you're using them. Yes, you do have more sets to do here, but they can work in if they need to.

    Act like a person who doesn't let themselves be intimidated and you will BECOME a person who doesn't let themselves be intimidated.
  • Mutant13
    Mutant13 Posts: 2,485 Member
    I was a little at first, mostly because I thought they would all be snickering at me.

    It's a little vain, but I got through it by telling myself 'one day, ill come in, pick up a big *kitten* weight and impress the *kitten* out of them'

    Also I've actually found most other people in the weight room don't really mind what you're doing. The two times I've caught people staring at me, the following happened-

    The first one was a woman. She wanted to know where is gotten my shirt.

    The second was a guy. When I looked back at him he smiled. I'd say he was other watching to see if I was still using a weight I had so he could use it, or looking at my butt ;)

    So don't worry. Just focus and doing your future self a favour and being awesome
  • kdeaux1959
    kdeaux1959 Posts: 2,675 Member
    In our gym there is actually a good mix of male and female.. Some of the females are stronger lifters than I am. We have a really supportive community and even the stronger lifter guys are supportive of those of us who have not been there as long. I won't lie to you though... Each gym community is different. If you find yourself bothered by an occasional guy, discuss it with the management of the gym... they don't want issues any more than you do. In the end, we are all there for the same purpose (well, most of us are)... we want to get stronger. I enjoy seeing others work out and may occasionally look and see what they are doing... Many times this is simply because I want to know what seems to be really working for you... Yes, I have picked up strength training exercises from women... One in particular had obviously strong shoulders and I realized one of the exercises she was doing would really help on that... so I started doing it and it does help... So lift, learn and enjoy.
  • sixpacking
    sixpacking Posts: 148 Member
    just do it, you're paying money just as they are!
  • lawrahmck
    lawrahmck Posts: 57
    I agree with other comments, if you're not sure on what to do once you're in there, get a trainer for a couple of sessions so you're confident. For me, it's headphones in, do your thing. Go for it :)
  • minimalist92
    minimalist92 Posts: 11
    you guys are all right. I just need to get over my insecurities and get in there.

    Thanks for the pep talks! :)

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