Gym Fear

jillsjourney

Does anyone else have a fear of joining a gym? I don't want to be mocked because of my size and lack of coordination. I have been doing exercise videos at home but would love to add strength training and machines. Does anyone know out of all the big name gyms if one is better than the other? I live in the Omaha area and there is an array of gyms to choose from, I just don't know how to pick one and how to get past this fear that everyone will be making fun of the "fat girl" at the gym.

Thanks for any advice.

DavPul

Don't overthink this. Pick the closest one to your house that you can afford. And then go. No one is going to mock you for your weight. Just go work out.

Crankstr

Does anyone else have a fear of joining a gym? I don't want to be mocked because of my size and lack of coordination. I have been doing exercise videos at home but would love to add strength training and machines. Does anyone know out of all the big name gyms if one is better than the other? I live in the Omaha area and there is an array of gyms to choose from, I just don't know how to pick one and how to get past this fear that everyone will be making fun of the "fat girl" at the gym.

Thanks for any advice.

I did... I was sad and ashamed about the way I looked. I had a lot of anxiety and fear about going in and looking stupid.
BUT I did it...I faced my fear, told it to (blank off) and went...

Every time it got a little easier...you can do this
Feel free to look in my pics...there are some before pics from a year and half ago

I recommend strength training.
http://startingstrength.wikia.com/wiki/The_Starting_Strength_Novice/Beginner_Programs

ebr250

Once you realize everyone at the gym is thinking about themselves you will lose the "gym fear." No one is looking at you. When I move to a new area (and I move a lot ugh!) I tour all the gyms within a workable distance. There really is no substitute for seeing the gyms in person. Choose the one that you really feel comfortable or excited to visit and dive in!

714rah714

Everyone's busy doing there own thing at the gym. so trust me when I tell you that no one will even notice that you are there. Good luck to you

jillsjourney

Thanks you all are right. I just need to face my fear and get over myself. I appreciate it.

sukatx

Personally, when I see people at the gym who you might call the "fat girl", I feel admiration for them. I know how difficult it can be to commit to exercising, so anyone who does it deserves a little admiration. But it's more challenging for people who are more overweight simply because they're carrying more weight on their bodies than an average-weight person.

So, think of that when you hit that gym! Sure, there are going to be a couple of shallow people who have negative opinion of you, but those aren't the types of people you'd want anything to do with. For the most part, people working out at the gym are doing so because they're trying to improve themselves and they'll think positively of you for doing the same!

arcticfox04

Only fear your having a is a mental fear. When I goto the gym I pretty much zone out everyone unless someone needs a spot.

Angie__1MR

You gotta start somewhere! People are going to look at you and think you're there to get healthy, that you're making a change, that you're doing something great for yourself! The serious gym goers aren't even going to notice you.

Hannah7783

I used to have Gym Fear too! I was so worried that everyone there would be lean mean gym machines, that it used to put me off, to the point that I just decided there is no point going EVER. But the reality is - that while there will be some people there like that, there will be plenty of others who aren't! And don't forget, some of the gym bunnies are former couch potatoes! We all have to start somewhere, and sounds like you are starting in a good place! You've already done something at home, you want to improve further and so you are going to go to the gym! Excellent!

I'm in the UK so I can't recommend and particular gyms near you, but I'm sure you can go and look around some and see how you like them.

Having said that, I am now at a gym that is much more 'me' than others I have been to. It's a really relaxed atmosphere, the staff are helpful and it's not an intimidating place - neither is it wall to wall mirrors!! (I don't understand why some gyms have so many mirrors - a few in choice places is great for being able to look at your form while you are doing a certain exercise... but in front of the treadmill...?! That put me off big time - I looked horrendous!!!) And I went to another which was above a KFC... so you'd be running on the treadmill, as if you were running towards the chicken!! Which is just not good!!!! (Although, did used to make me chuckle!). As I said my gym now is great and I actually love to go there and spend a morning/afternoon, because it's just a nice place to be - theres a little terrace cafe, an outdoor pool for the spring/summer or if you are a little crazy the winter too, there are plenty of classes and the gym is not full of meatheads! Its also in the middle of a park, so I often walk there from home as its pleasant to do that, or I have a cool down by walking round the park if I have driven there.

So, I would say, have a look round your local gyms and see which one you feel comfortable in. Once you have found one, keep going with your programme because it's so nice to have measurable results. For example, when I started going I could only walk/run on the treadmill for a really short time, and really slowly. This morning, I did 6k on it in 50 minutes. When you can see improvements in yourself, it really makes it worthwhile going, and you will lose the fear eventually!!!!!

Go and find a gym - I PROMISE the anticipation of the first workout will be so much worse than the reality! Let us know how you get on!

Cr01502

Don't overthink this. Pick the closest one to your house that you can afford. And then go. No one is going to mock you for your weight. Just go work out.

This. The hardest part is just getting there.

lacroyx

It took me a while. I started going when I was around 450+ lbs. I would go super early or really late at night. I had a membership at one of those 24/7 gyms. I was self-conscious and wanted to avoid being seen by anyone. I am near sighted so I wear contacts and one morning, in my rush to get to the gym to do my workout and leave before others arrived, I didn't wash my hands before popping in my contacts. Upon arriving to the gym my eyes burned so I removed them. Since I couldn't see at all I had to do everything much slower. People of course starting arriving and I began to panic. I then laughed at myself when I realized I couldn't tell if they were looking at me. Since then I no longer care who is at the gym.

leannems

I'm a big girl that goes to the gym 4-5 times a week (5'9, 275, looking to lose 100 lbs). I work my butt off in there. I sweat like a pig and do strength training and interval cardio.

When I first started going I would get headaches just from doing the elliptical. Now I push myself harder and harder, and get my heart rate up higher than ever before - with no headaches. I've already made my heart healthier.

All the employees know me by name. A lot of the members too. Everyone knows I'm in there to better my health in 2013 and they're all proud of me. I'm not always the biggest person in the gym, but frequently I am. No one says anything but encouragement.

Heck - I went in yesterday in my work clothes (I usually change into my workout gear before I get to the gym) and everyone was telling me how beautiful I look in "non-gym" clothes.

Tour the gyms which are closest to your work or home (the ones you're most likely to go to) and see which feels the best. When you pick one to join, get to know the employees as well as the other members who go at the same time that you do. No one will judge you for anything other than something positive. They will see that you are there for your health, and they will admire you for it. Trust me on this, as I really am the big girl at the gym.

Viola47

I second DavPul.

However, I've had the same fears you have, so here are some things that have helped me in the past:
-NO ONE will make fun of you.
- People in the gym aren't all fit and model-esque. There are people of all different shapes and sizes and different fitness levels.
- People in the gym - particularly the very fit ones - are really more interested in watching themselves than in watching other people (for a number of reasons)
- Being overweight at the gym can actually gain you respect - you're putting yourself out there, and trying to better yourself and your life, and people can see that. No matter what shape you're in, you should be proud that you're putting in effort to improve your health!
-In my personal experience, people at the gym either ignore everybody (most people are like this), or they're kind of friendly, but still basically ignore everybody. Most people don't go to the gym to be social.

You can tour gyms before you join to see how comfortable you feel. Some gyms have women-only sections (like Gold's Gym), if that helps. Also, some people say that paying for a personal trainer the first few times helps them get more comfortable at the gym and familiar with the equipment. Regardless, the employees should be willing to explain and show you how to use any equipment you have questions about. In my experience, it doesn't matter if you're the fat girl or the buff guy - people at the gym leave you alone, the employees are nice and mostly helpful, and it's a GREAT experience. Good luck!

christy3565

I was terrified when I first started going for the same reasons you are. Once there I realized no one even looked twice at me. They were all there for the same reason I was, to get healthy. I know how hard it can be to try something because you are afraid your size will make you stand out, but most people I have talked to are in awe of you doing what you are doing to make a better you.
You can do it girl!

darrensurrey

They probably won't look at you but one thing you could do to appear to be part of the crowd is to hire the services of one of their PTers for a few sessions. When they see a regular with a new person, they'll probably accept you for who you are and as one of the gang. Humans, eh. Who needs 'em.

jillsjourney

Thank you everyone! You are all so encouraging. I am going to go tour some gyms today! I will remember all of your words of encouragement.
I will update and let everyone know which one I choose!

Rambo529

The vast majority of people at the gym don't care what anyone looks like, and I have yet to see anyone who's overweight get mocked at my gym. Some of the people there have been in your shoes and did something about it, which holds more merit than anything else there. Don't be afraid to ask someone how to use a machine if you're unfamiliar with it either. It happens to me all the time, and I had to ask on a few machines that were unfamiliar to me when I first joined my gym.

Good Luck!

roxxie25

A few other thoughts:

1) Different gyms have different vibes, so you need to find one that feels right for you. Maybe just visit a few gyms for a tour just to familiarize yourself with the different options.
2) Is there an all female gym like curves in your area? That might be less intimidating for you.
3) You can absolutely get a good work out at home with free weights and DVDs. Don't let your fear of the gym hold you back from incorporating some strength training at home.

Good luck!

1Fizzle

Don't overthink this. Pick the closest one to your house that you can afford. And then go. No one is going to mock you for your weight. Just go work out.

I agree....you see all ages, colors, shapes and sizes at the gym. They all let you tour their facilities, so you can feel free to see what each offers. So go, it will become habit and before you know it, you'll be a sweat-filled, iPod wearing machine like the rest of us!! C'mon!!!

Angie1366

Don't your gyms do a free try out, ask a friend or relative to go with you and see if they make you feel comfortable or not. Never ever feel embarrassed to go to the gym. When I see a bigger person in the gym I think how great it is to see them working out... And think - crikey they are running fast!!!!!

After all - anyone can sit in the house doing nothing!
And...
To be fair, all the ones with perfect mascara and skinny bodies make me laugh - they usually stand around chatting looking in the mirror at themselves, too self centred to care about anyone else... (and they never ever sweat!!! I mean it's a gym!!)
The muscle builders are so focussed on their exercise regime, they are not interested in anyone else.
The rest of us are there with a nice smile, an encouraging chat and the need for our own encouragement!

SO DO IT! Join that gym and meet new friends like me!

andeey

Yea, I've been there, done that. I'm not going to lie, it *is* scary if you're intimidated to go. But after I toured my gym and saw so many shapes, sizes, and ability levels, I felt much more comfortable and forced myself to go. The first few times, it was scary, just because you think everyone is staring at you, but they are just doing their work. Throw headphones in and go about your business. After those first few times, that feeling went away.

Nearly a year later, and I'm amazed at how much I like going to the gym. The employees know me and (surprise to me) I've made friends at the gym along the way. People see I'm working hard (sweating like a pig, in there on a regular basis, losing weight, changing my shape) and they comment in a positive manner. So, are they looking? I guess so, right? But that's motivated me to keep going. Nobody ... and I mean NOBODY, is going to say anything rude or negative to you.

Good luck!

tpt1950

Everyone has to be a beginner at some point.... so no matter what fitness level they are presently at, they all had to walk into that gym for the first time too!!! Don't let that stop you ~ chances are that everyone in that gym is focused on what they are doing, NOT what you are doing. Just bite the bullet and get started - YOU CAN DO IT!!!

bbgughj

I would have to agree with all , Everyone at the gym is busy doing their own thing, Just pick one close to home and go...
If you have that much fear , Bring your Ipod , Mp3 player , and just go to town , It helps blocking any distraction while working out ...

MumOfADuo

Does anyone else have a fear of joining a gym? I don't want to be mocked because of my size and lack of coordination. I have been doing exercise videos at home but would love to add strength training and machines. Does anyone know out of all the big name gyms if one is better than the other? I live in the Omaha area and there is an array of gyms to choose from, I just don't know how to pick one and how to get past this fear that everyone will be making fun of the "fat girl" at the gym.

Thanks for any advice.

I work in a gym.....you need to find the gym where you feel comfortable....I guarantee you that MOST people that look at you when you walk into a gym are NOT thinking look at the fat girl...they (if they are true gym rats) are thinking, YOU GO GIRL!!! YOU ROCK FOR TAKING THAT 1st STEP because we KNOW how hard that step can be!!!....THAT is what they are thinking...and in REALITY...who CARES what they think (telling myself this!!!) It is hard WORKING in a gym and being the biggest one here, but I am working on ME and the support you will get if you stick with it is AMAZING!!!!!!!! YOU CAN DO IT!!!!!

cubbies77

I started going to the Y when I weighed 357 pounds. Nobody looked at me twice. Even still, I always chose a treadmill at the back so nobody had to look at my butt. While there, I realized everyone was focused on their machine or the TV sets. Nobody looked at anyone else for more than a second because they were so focused. Once I started working out, I was the same way.

Now I go to Planet Fitness. I use the recumbent bikes, ellipticals, and treadmills. It's the same thing. Everyone is staring at their machine, their feet, or the TV sets. The people in the weight area are looking in the mirrors to make sure they have proper form. Nobody has looked at me longer than a quick glance to make sure I'm not waiting for their machine or to nod and say "hi" at one of the little spray bottle/paper towel areas near the machines. Again, I'm the same way. When I'm on a machine, I'm pretty much staring at the timer thinking, "Ten more minutes... nine more minute... five more minutes... omg one more minute push push push..."

Also, even though I'm not one of the fit people yet, I do feel very proud when a heavy person walks in and starts exercising. I don't care how fast or slow they're going; I'm just so happy they're there, and I think (to myself), "I hope they keep coming. I hope they don't get scared. I hope they realize how much fun this is."

Nobody has ever teased me or looked at me funny. Someone did smile at me the other day, and I'm not sure if it was friendly or mocking, but I really don't care. I like to think it was friendly. If they were mocking me, screw them. I'm going to look *awesome* in several months, and then they can eat their foot.

LoveMyLife_NYC

When I first started working with my trainer, I was out of shape with a back injury. I was hard on myself because I couldn't do the exercises and thought I looked silly. He grabbed me by the shoulders, looked me right in the eye and said, "But you're here."

It's been a few months now, and all those "strong, fit" people who used to intimidate me at the gym say hi to me now. I became one of them just by showing up and taking care of my body.

You're at the gym to take care of yourself. Not to impress others.

jbalistriere

I have the same fear; all eyes are on you and if you don't a machine the right way or you start off slower people will laugh or make rude comments. While, yes, sometimes people are jerks, most of the time they're incredibly supportive. For example, there were two ladies (who, btw, weren't exactly tiny themselves), kinda laughing and making comments under their breath when I first started going. I was tempted to turn around and walk away. I was extremely fortunate enough to be able to talk to my boss and adjust my work schedule so that I'm done with work earlier (my daugher has sports that start at 5:00) and on my non-mommycheerleader days, I can get to the gym before the rush and that really helped me. Lately, I've been working more and the gym has been ridiculously crowded with the 9-5ers and the Resolutioners but I'm not discouraged. I feel like I have a right to be there, too. I understand that my approach was a little extreme and I was very fortunate to have the opportunity to adjust my schedule to a less busy time but it really helped me.

That said, I've lost 53 pounds and am still the "fatty" at the gym. It's challenging but when I finally opened up about how much I struggle to another lady that works out around the same time that I do, she said "you know what, at least you're doing something about it and NO ONE can fault you for that". She's right. Another item worth noting is that the gym I use it at work - which I think adds to my anxiety because I really have no desire for the people I need to take me seriously to see me at my most vulnerable but I think work is where I get the most encouragement.

While my anxiety is not gone, it is a lot better. I've used my stubborness to my advantage to say that I will not let someone's jerkiness take away from my goals. And, you shouldn't either. You deserve to be healthy as much as everyone else does. Be strong, you're going to do great! And, if you ever need a little support - add me. We can pep talk each other. Best of luck!

wimeezer

Surprisingly no. And I joined at 390 lbs. Doubly surprising because I am not very comfortable in public situations. I wanted it and want going to let anyone stop me (even myself). Once I got there and realized everyone is focused in their workout and not everyone elder I was 100% fine. I love the gym; I'm there 6 days a week, twice a day sometimes. My comfort there is nothing short of a miracle. Please don't let your fear keep you from doing what you want to do. Go for it!

loolabell15

Everyone focuses on their own workout. Don't worry about others around you. Everyone is there for the same reason! To be healthy.

Corkline

You need to read this.

Hey, Fat Girl!

Yes, you. The one feigning to not see me when we cross paths on the running track. The one not even wearing sports gear, breathing heavy. You’re slow, you breathe hard and your efforts at moving forward make you cringe.

You cling shyly to the furthest corridor, sometimes making larger loops on the gravel ring by the track just so you’re not on it. You sweat so much that your hair is all wet. You rarely stay for more than 20 minutes at a time, and you look exhausted when you leave to go back home. You never talk to anyone. I’ve got something I’d like to say to you.

You are awesome.

If you’d look me in the eye only for an instant, you would notice the reverence and respect I have for you. The adventure you have started is tremendous; it leads to a better health, to renewed confidence and to a brand new kind of freedom. The gifts you will receive from running will far exceed the gigantic effort it takes you to show up here, to face your fears and to bravely set yourself in motion, in front of others.

You have already begun your transformation. You no longer accept this physical state of numbness and passivity. You have taken a difficult decision, but one that holds so much promise. Every hard breath you take is actually a tad easier than the one before, and every step is ever so slightly lighter. Each push forward leaves the former person you were in your wake, creating room for an improved version, one that is stronger, healthier and forward-looking, one who knows that anything is possible.

You’re a hero to me. And, if you’d take off the blaring headphones and put your head up for more than a second or two, you would notice that the other runners you cross, the ones that probably make you feel so inadequate, stare in awe at your determination. They, of all people, know best where you are coming from. They heard the resolutions of so many others, who vowed to pick up running and improve their health, “starting next week”. Yet, it is YOU who runs alongside, who digs from deep inside to find the strength to come here, and to come back again.

You are a runner, and no one can take that away from you. You are relentlessly moving forward. You are stronger than even you think, and you are about to be amazed by what you can do. One day, very soon, maybe tomorrow, you’ll step outside and marvel at your capabilities. You will not believe your own body, you will realize that you can do this. And a new horizon will open up for you. You are a true inspiration.

I bow to you.

From: http://flintland.blogspot.com/2012/05/hey-fat-girl.html?m=1

This is on my inspiration board.