Funny stupid jokes. 3..2..1.. GO!

Scareah
Scareah Posts: 40 Member
What kind of shorts do clouds wear.. Thunderwear!

Why did the tomato blush? Because she saw the salad dressing

Replies

  • Windy_
    Windy_ Posts: 1,012 Member
    What do you call a bear with no teeth?














    Gummi bear.
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
    What did one wall say to the other wall?











    Meet ya in the corner...
  • Windy_
    Windy_ Posts: 1,012 Member
    How many apples grow on a tree?















    All of them.
  • Lisa1971
    Lisa1971 Posts: 3,069 Member
    Why did the chicken cross the road?























    Because the hen egged him on!
  • mcshoelovin22
    mcshoelovin22 Posts: 263 Member
    Who did Tigger find in the toilet?













    Pooh
  • Windy_
    Windy_ Posts: 1,012 Member
    What can you steal and not get in trouble for?












    2nd base.
  • myofibril
    myofibril Posts: 4,500 Member
    Knock knock
    Who's there?
    Yodel A He
    Yodel A He who?
    I didn't know you could yodel!
  • PhiliciousCurves
    PhiliciousCurves Posts: 395 Member
    How do you make a handkerchief dance?




    You put a little boogie in it.

    Get it? Boogie? :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Sometimes, I just crack myself up!
  • jesslintch
    jesslintch Posts: 63 Member
    What do pig police officers use?






    Ham-cuffs.
  • FitBeto
    FitBeto Posts: 2,121 Member
    *holds up mirror to your face*
  • myofibril
    myofibril Posts: 4,500 Member
    Knock knock
    Who's there?
    Doris
    Doris who?
    Doris locked so let me in goddamit!
  • myofibril
    myofibril Posts: 4,500 Member
    Knock knock
    Who's there?
    Olivia
    Olivia who?
    Olivia here so how the hell did you get into my house???
  • grammysboy
    grammysboy Posts: 151 Member
    When geese fly south for the winter, they fly in a V formation. Why is one side of the V always longer than the other?








    There are more geese on that side.
  • Betsiz17
    Betsiz17 Posts: 95 Member
    Did you hear about the fire at the circus???


    It was in tents.
  • Betsiz17
    Betsiz17 Posts: 95 Member
    What did the fish say when he swam into the wall???




    "Dam"
  • grammysboy
    grammysboy Posts: 151 Member
    A priest, a rabbi, a blonde and a three legged dog walked into a bar. The bar tender looked up and said " What is this, some kind of a joke !!
  • n0ob
    n0ob Posts: 2,390 Member
    how do you kill a blue elephant? Blue elephant gun...

    How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold his trunk until he turns blue then shoot him with a blue elephant gun.
  • grammysboy
    grammysboy Posts: 151 Member
    Yesterday my dog ate a cantelope. She has been a little melon collie ever since.
  • rush0321
    rush0321 Posts: 120 Member
    Why aren't there any Walmarts in Afghanistan ?!











    Because there are too many Targets!!! :laugh:
  • Betsiz17
    Betsiz17 Posts: 95 Member
    Yesterday my dog ate a cantelope. She has been a little melon collie ever since.

    Now THAT's FUNNY
  • Why aren't dragons hungry on the weekends?





    Because they feasted on weak knights :-) :laugh:
  • rsjohnb
    rsjohnb Posts: 215 Member
    what do you call a guy with a rubber toe.....





    Roberto!:laugh: